Ender: The hunted.....LbH: Ender's shield
By Ender
Ender & LbH: *Sitting in director's chairs in a room with a cheep prop on a stage*
LbH: NEXT!!
Man: *Walks onto the stage holding a shotgun* Hail to the King baby....
Ender: Ok.....*Checks list*.....Duke....What kinda skills do you have that would be helpful to the popularity of our fic?
Duke: I've saved the earth a couple times......Saved the earth's babes a couple times......I got this shotgun here........I named him bob. I don't have many friends so now he is my friend. Isn't that right bob?
Bob: *Can't talk because he is a shotgun and shotguns don't have mouths*
Ender: Uh.....We'll get back to you.....NEXT
Kinneas: *Walks onto the stage and takes a BIG bow* Hello my adoring fans, I Kinneas have accepted your gracious offer to perform here for you all. I really hope that--Hey, whats going on? Where are all the fans?
LbH: Uh....Kinneas? That was yesterday. You completely missed the concert and have a whole bunch of angry people who wasted their money on tickets looking for you.
Kinneas: Oh....ok. So what are we doing here?
Ender: I'm auditioning for people to insert into my fic.
Kinneas: OH! OH! CAN I TRY???
Ender : Uh....how many people are left outside?
Kinneas: Um....I was practicing outside and........
Ender: Nevermind. I dont wana hear it.
Kinneas: Does that mean you will put me in your fic??? ^_^
Ender: O_o Kinneas? You are already in my fic, remember?
Kinneas: Oh yea....I wana do something new.... can we think of something new to do?
Ender: Uh....*Checks Watch* Ok. But I have to be back home by nine o'clock. Ok?
Kinneas: Why do you have to be home? And just where do you live anyway?
Ender: Tifa found me after the palace disaster in the last chapter. She really likes having me around...
Kinneas: Oh.. isn't that sweet....So you're having a good time?
Ender: NO!! SHE THINKS THAT I NEED TO BE ADOPTED! I DON'T WANT TO BE ADOPTED, I'M AN AUTHOR!!!!
Kinneas: *Snicker*
Ender: Dont even start that...
Kinneas: *Covering mouth to keep from laughing out loud*
Ender: O_O IM WARNING YOU!!!
Kinneas: Ok, ok.....What kinda job should I have?
LbH: Hmmmm.....How about bodyguard?
Kinneas: :) THAT'S A GREAT IDEA!!!!
Ender: I'm going to regret this.....
Zage: *Walks into the room* Ender! Hows it goin buddy?
Ender: Zage.....you left me at the hands of Tifa......
Kinneas: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Ender: *Swipes Kinneas' Clarinet of doom from her hands and beats her over the head*
Clarinet of doom: *WACK* *SMACK*
Kinneas: Gahhh....*Falls to the floor unconscious*
Ender: I really needed to do that.
Zage: Uh....Ender?
Ender: Not now Zage.
Zage: But Ender....this is important!!
Ender: Zage...I will not help you find Psycho_monkey. Why dont you go ask Zidane?
Zage: ENDER!!
Ender: WHAT?!?!?!?!?
Zage: *Points above Ender*
Ender: *Looks up to see Tkarr, Takui's giant demon harpi, right above him bearing its claw*
Ender: eep...
Tkarr: GRWARRRRR
Ender: ACK!!!
LbH: RUN AWAYYYYY!!!!!
Ender: Get back here you!!! *Grabs LbH*
Tkarr: *Dives at Ender*
Ender: O_O NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! *Raises LbH up in between him and Tkarr*
Tkarr: *Flys right into LbH's back and gets hedgehog spines stuck everywhere*
Ender: YEA!!!
Tkarr: *Falls to the ground whimpering*
Ender: *Walks over to Tkarr* HA! I'm smarter!
LbH: O_O *Twitch* *Twitch*
Ender: I AM THE MASTER!!!
Tkarr: WRAWRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!
Ender: Uh oh....
Tkarr: *Advances towards Ender*
???: CONFUSE!!!!
Tkarr: WRAWRAW-moo!!!
Ender: O_o
Tifa: Ender! Lets go!!!
Ender: *Grabs Zage and Kinneas and runs towards exit*
Tkarr: MOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
LbH: *Hypnotically* Giant cheeseburger...... *Does the trademark Homer Simpson drool with head back and everything*
Ender: LbH!! IT'S NOT A COW! DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!
LbH: *Pulls spike off of his back* *Hypnotically* Must kill cow.....must get cheeseburger......
Zage: LBH! YOU IDIOT!!!
Tkarr: *Looks at LbH amused for a moment before it realizes that LbH is trying to kill it*
LbH: *Hypnotically* Must.....kill.....
Tkarr: *Grabs LbH* MOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! *Flys off to take LbH to Takui*
*************************
At Takui's NEW palace location
*************************
Takui: Sephy! I want a report on my new palace!
Sephiroth: At this rate, it will be complete by august.
Takui: Please go round up some new slaves or something. We need this thing done by summer.
Kurai: Takui! Tkarr is returning! And it looks like its holding something!
Takui: Excellent! *Mr. Burns style*
Tkarr: MOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! *Dives into the room and drops a twitching LbH on the floor in front of Takui*
Takui: What the F***?!?
Tkarr: MMMOOOOOOOO!!!!
Sephiroth: O_o I think its time to put ol'Bessie down ma......
Takui: I'll deal with you later Sephers....HEAL!!!
Tkarr: GWARRRWRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!1
Takui: ^_^ Much better! Sephy? Can you please take this hedgehog and chain him up in the dungeon?
Sephiroth: Yea....*Grabs LbH and drags him off*
Takui: This is going well.....
Kurai: I think we should have just left him as a muse.....he's causing too much trouble....
Vincent: O_O DO YOU REALISE WHAT IT WOULD DO TO HER WORK?!? WITH HIM MUSING FOR HER, ALL HER FICS WOULD BOMB AND WE WOULD BE LAUGHED OFF FANFICTION.NET!!!!!
Kurai: Good point.....Well, I'm off....I have some things to go and buy.....
Takui: O_o What is there on this planet that you don't already own?!?!?!?
Kurai: A bigger coffin. :)
Takui: Oh good grief.....
Snoopy: Walks up to Takui with a food bowl in his mouth.....
Takui: O_o Ok....This is just getting ridiculous....END THE FIC ALREAY!!!!!
A/N: Thank you, to all of you that are reading this.....just a few things to say really quickly before I let you go....I don't own Duke Nukem. ID Software owns him. I don't own Monty Python. I don't know who owns him anymore...I don't own anything from The Simpsons (Thank god)...and I don't own Snoopy. Snoopy was created by Charles Sholultz (Did I spell that right?).....Thats about it....OH YEA! REVIEW PLEASE!! YOU NEED TO BE A GOOD READER AND TELL ME HOW GOOD THIS IS OR HOW MUCH IT SUCKS!!! (I wouldn't flame me if I were you... its not very wise to upset me.....did any of that make sense???)