How Many People Did You Have To Kill?
Part 1 - Jess
Spoilers: References to 'Lorelai's Graduation Day'.
Pairing R/J with one Java Junkie reference.
Belongs... not to me. Just a humble fan writing a little extension to the genius of Amy Sherman-Palladino and friends... Don't sue me! Please!
A/N: This is just a little super-cliché Rory and Jess story. It's not really cliché until the last bit, so if you have a problem with that, then I'm sorry. It was mostly written late at night, so it might not make a whole lot of sense. Although no one's ever mentioned an alcoholism in Liz, I've always thought it possible, so that's why it's included. That's why it's got a PG-13 rating. Please R&R. I live only because of reviews. (Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating.) I'll stop rambling now, so read, read, read and review, review, review! -Em (a.k.a. PPW)
She came to see me. Me. She skipped school, hopped on a bus, wandered around New York to find me.
I've been sitting here for the past two weeks either reading in the park or lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about her. It's driving me crazy.
I can't say I had an exactly warm welcome when I got here. Mom just looked at me and my bag and left. Came home pissed and passed out in the hallway. I haven't had to deal with that in so long, I almost forgot what to do. I there for about and hour, just watching her sleep. Neither one of us moved.
It was like shell shock. I was living in the smallest, most sheltered place imaginable for nine months. To come back to what had been formally normal was almost impossible. The difference was overwhelming.
I finally woke up to myself and picked her up and dumped her in bed. No one should have to wake up on a cold linoleum floor, not even my mother.
We probably haven't exchanged more than ten words since then. If she's home, I make sure to get out. She's dying to interrogate me as to why I'm back, but I think she's finally learned that she'll never understand me. I think she's given up trying. Which is fine by me.
Nothing here has changed much, even if I feel everything has. The streets are still filled with strangers, lost even if they think they know where they're going. It's interesting to see the same crazy guy in an old fishing hat and Columbo coat walking in front of my building whenever I enter or leave. If I look out my window at any other time, I can't see him, but everyday he's there. He gives me a toothless grin and then proceeds to stare at the sky.
I haven't gone to see Seth or Scott since I've been back. They don't know I'm here and don't need to. Best friends somehow seem obsolete when the girl with the clearest blue eyes is far away. Every reason I wanted to be in New York again has gone out the window. When I said that I wanted to get as far away from Star Hollow humanly possible, I thought I meant it. I did at the time.
Maybe it was the bus ride here that made me realize that it was home. People dying to get away from small-town life and repression surrounded me, but I could only think about going back. Being the good guy and making everything right again.
Jess from nine months ago would never do that. The thought wouldn't have even crossed his mind. This Jess would do anything to change what happened. It really makes me sick. Everything I've ever believed in seems irrelevant.
All because of a girl. An academic genius. A girl that wears a plaid skirt and bowling shoes to private school everyday - by choice. She's going to go to Harvard. She has a meat-and-potatoes boyfriend. The perfect relationship with her mother.
But she also has the best library outside my own. Her music taste is exceptional and she has the most unjaded outlook on the world. She has a naiveté that is so rare to find in any girl. And the way she looks right through me like she does. I've talked more to her in the last two months than I have with anyone. Ever.
Maybe that's why she really came. To scrutinize and delve further into my soul. She said she came because I didn't say goodbye. Was that really it? Did she really find life so much more interesting when I was there? Do I really bring anything to her life that she can't find in Stars Hollow?
But then I think of how she said goodbye and I know that the answers can only be yes.
The only thing my mind is telling me is to give in - take a chance. Hop on a bus and see if all of everything is true.
And it's becoming harder and harder to resist as the days go by and that goodbye reechoes in my ears.
Part 1 - Jess
Spoilers: References to 'Lorelai's Graduation Day'.
Pairing R/J with one Java Junkie reference.
Belongs... not to me. Just a humble fan writing a little extension to the genius of Amy Sherman-Palladino and friends... Don't sue me! Please!
A/N: This is just a little super-cliché Rory and Jess story. It's not really cliché until the last bit, so if you have a problem with that, then I'm sorry. It was mostly written late at night, so it might not make a whole lot of sense. Although no one's ever mentioned an alcoholism in Liz, I've always thought it possible, so that's why it's included. That's why it's got a PG-13 rating. Please R&R. I live only because of reviews. (Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating.) I'll stop rambling now, so read, read, read and review, review, review! -Em (a.k.a. PPW)
She came to see me. Me. She skipped school, hopped on a bus, wandered around New York to find me.
I've been sitting here for the past two weeks either reading in the park or lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about her. It's driving me crazy.
I can't say I had an exactly warm welcome when I got here. Mom just looked at me and my bag and left. Came home pissed and passed out in the hallway. I haven't had to deal with that in so long, I almost forgot what to do. I there for about and hour, just watching her sleep. Neither one of us moved.
It was like shell shock. I was living in the smallest, most sheltered place imaginable for nine months. To come back to what had been formally normal was almost impossible. The difference was overwhelming.
I finally woke up to myself and picked her up and dumped her in bed. No one should have to wake up on a cold linoleum floor, not even my mother.
We probably haven't exchanged more than ten words since then. If she's home, I make sure to get out. She's dying to interrogate me as to why I'm back, but I think she's finally learned that she'll never understand me. I think she's given up trying. Which is fine by me.
Nothing here has changed much, even if I feel everything has. The streets are still filled with strangers, lost even if they think they know where they're going. It's interesting to see the same crazy guy in an old fishing hat and Columbo coat walking in front of my building whenever I enter or leave. If I look out my window at any other time, I can't see him, but everyday he's there. He gives me a toothless grin and then proceeds to stare at the sky.
I haven't gone to see Seth or Scott since I've been back. They don't know I'm here and don't need to. Best friends somehow seem obsolete when the girl with the clearest blue eyes is far away. Every reason I wanted to be in New York again has gone out the window. When I said that I wanted to get as far away from Star Hollow humanly possible, I thought I meant it. I did at the time.
Maybe it was the bus ride here that made me realize that it was home. People dying to get away from small-town life and repression surrounded me, but I could only think about going back. Being the good guy and making everything right again.
Jess from nine months ago would never do that. The thought wouldn't have even crossed his mind. This Jess would do anything to change what happened. It really makes me sick. Everything I've ever believed in seems irrelevant.
All because of a girl. An academic genius. A girl that wears a plaid skirt and bowling shoes to private school everyday - by choice. She's going to go to Harvard. She has a meat-and-potatoes boyfriend. The perfect relationship with her mother.
But she also has the best library outside my own. Her music taste is exceptional and she has the most unjaded outlook on the world. She has a naiveté that is so rare to find in any girl. And the way she looks right through me like she does. I've talked more to her in the last two months than I have with anyone. Ever.
Maybe that's why she really came. To scrutinize and delve further into my soul. She said she came because I didn't say goodbye. Was that really it? Did she really find life so much more interesting when I was there? Do I really bring anything to her life that she can't find in Stars Hollow?
But then I think of how she said goodbye and I know that the answers can only be yes.
The only thing my mind is telling me is to give in - take a chance. Hop on a bus and see if all of everything is true.
And it's becoming harder and harder to resist as the days go by and that goodbye reechoes in my ears.