Ahhh yes, the next installment. I was listening to Lovers only by Maxwell when writing this, heehee its in the story as always.
Why? That question consumes my every waking moment. My every breath and beat of my heart. I lie here motionless. There are tubes stuck in me, I can't feel them. Logan sits for hours in the corner. Sayin nothing. What life is this? This is no life. The only view I see all day is the ceiling. Hmmmph. This is no existence. I'm gonna go crazy. I should have died.
What can I do for her? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. This strong woman, now so helpless, and defenseless. Decaying from her own self hatred, loathing. But what can I do? Well I can start by getting up off my butt. Sigh. It's so hard sometimes to look at her like this, scared and angry. Maybe I can change that. At least I'll try. I owe her that much.
"Max?"
"What?"
"You doing ok?"
"Yes."
"You know, I was thinking of getting you a bed that moves up and down."
Silence.
"I'll get that first thing tomorrow, ok?"
Silence. "Yeah."
"Well, if you need anything, I'll be just outside here." He paused by the bed. He looking at her. Then he moved on. He sat down on the couch. She heard his muffled crying.
She wasn't sure if she had fallen asleep or just was in a daze, but music brought her to reality. Lovers Only, by Maxwell was playing. Out of the corner of her eyes she noticed Logan leaning against the door, smiling.
"I want you to do something for me."
"What?"
"I want you to close your eyes."
"What?"
"Close your eyes."
"Why?"
"Please just do it." She sighed, and wondered what he was up to.
"Fine." She closed them.
"I want you to picture us dancing." She opened her eyes.
"What?"
"Close your eyes, come on." She closed them again, reluctantly.
"We're dancing slowly." He was crouched next to the bed, whispering in her ear. "Your head is resting against my shoulder. I kiss you." He leaned over and kissed her on the lips. "Then we look into each others eyes for hours, dancing slowly long after the music has stopped. I kiss you again." He kissed her softly. "Then you kiss me." His face was over hers. "And I tell you that I love you, as my hand caresses your cheek." His hand caressed her cheek. Tears began to fall from her eyes. "My fingers touch your lips." He did this. "Max, I need you, and I love you." She opened her eyes, tears still falling. He kissed her again, then picked her up in his arms.
"Logan, what are you doing?"
"Shhhhh. Close your eyes." He nestled her head against his shoulder, and slowly danced around. He kissed the top of her head, and rested his head there. She pictured them dancing in a huge ballroom that was all their own. It was lit by candle chandeliers, and the music played softly just for them. They were dancing, and smiling as they looked into each others eyes. Even when the music stopped, he continued to dance with her. Finally, he sat down on the couch, she was still in his arms. He looked down at her. "Always picture in your mind the two of us dancing when you think you are all alone, or you are scared. I will always be by your side, no matter what. I love you Max. I need you to understand that. I know that I didn't really show you that sometimes, but now I am. I'm sorry I wasn't there Max, I'm so sorry. Everyday I wish I had been." He trailed off.
"It's not your fault. It's mine."
"No Max it isn't."
"Yes it is. I was the one who went. I volunteered."
"If you hadn't someone else might have gotten killed. You sacrificed yourself for others lives. That's what I love about you most."
"But I can't move." She broke down there in his arms.
"Shhhhh." He held her there in his arms for hours. Holding her close, as her feelings let go. And she finally opened up to him, and let him in.
Sigh. I hope that was good. I was trying to think of the sweetest thing for him to do. And I thought, well dancing of course.
Why? That question consumes my every waking moment. My every breath and beat of my heart. I lie here motionless. There are tubes stuck in me, I can't feel them. Logan sits for hours in the corner. Sayin nothing. What life is this? This is no life. The only view I see all day is the ceiling. Hmmmph. This is no existence. I'm gonna go crazy. I should have died.
What can I do for her? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. This strong woman, now so helpless, and defenseless. Decaying from her own self hatred, loathing. But what can I do? Well I can start by getting up off my butt. Sigh. It's so hard sometimes to look at her like this, scared and angry. Maybe I can change that. At least I'll try. I owe her that much.
"Max?"
"What?"
"You doing ok?"
"Yes."
"You know, I was thinking of getting you a bed that moves up and down."
Silence.
"I'll get that first thing tomorrow, ok?"
Silence. "Yeah."
"Well, if you need anything, I'll be just outside here." He paused by the bed. He looking at her. Then he moved on. He sat down on the couch. She heard his muffled crying.
She wasn't sure if she had fallen asleep or just was in a daze, but music brought her to reality. Lovers Only, by Maxwell was playing. Out of the corner of her eyes she noticed Logan leaning against the door, smiling.
"I want you to do something for me."
"What?"
"I want you to close your eyes."
"What?"
"Close your eyes."
"Why?"
"Please just do it." She sighed, and wondered what he was up to.
"Fine." She closed them.
"I want you to picture us dancing." She opened her eyes.
"What?"
"Close your eyes, come on." She closed them again, reluctantly.
"We're dancing slowly." He was crouched next to the bed, whispering in her ear. "Your head is resting against my shoulder. I kiss you." He leaned over and kissed her on the lips. "Then we look into each others eyes for hours, dancing slowly long after the music has stopped. I kiss you again." He kissed her softly. "Then you kiss me." His face was over hers. "And I tell you that I love you, as my hand caresses your cheek." His hand caressed her cheek. Tears began to fall from her eyes. "My fingers touch your lips." He did this. "Max, I need you, and I love you." She opened her eyes, tears still falling. He kissed her again, then picked her up in his arms.
"Logan, what are you doing?"
"Shhhhh. Close your eyes." He nestled her head against his shoulder, and slowly danced around. He kissed the top of her head, and rested his head there. She pictured them dancing in a huge ballroom that was all their own. It was lit by candle chandeliers, and the music played softly just for them. They were dancing, and smiling as they looked into each others eyes. Even when the music stopped, he continued to dance with her. Finally, he sat down on the couch, she was still in his arms. He looked down at her. "Always picture in your mind the two of us dancing when you think you are all alone, or you are scared. I will always be by your side, no matter what. I love you Max. I need you to understand that. I know that I didn't really show you that sometimes, but now I am. I'm sorry I wasn't there Max, I'm so sorry. Everyday I wish I had been." He trailed off.
"It's not your fault. It's mine."
"No Max it isn't."
"Yes it is. I was the one who went. I volunteered."
"If you hadn't someone else might have gotten killed. You sacrificed yourself for others lives. That's what I love about you most."
"But I can't move." She broke down there in his arms.
"Shhhhh." He held her there in his arms for hours. Holding her close, as her feelings let go. And she finally opened up to him, and let him in.
Sigh. I hope that was good. I was trying to think of the sweetest thing for him to do. And I thought, well dancing of course.