By Eve
Disclaimer: I don't claim any ownership to GW. Obviously if you're reading this story then you *do* know what would have happen if I had any say…
Warning: You think I'd get tired of putting these up… There's blood, gore, suggested *adult* situations, as well as the usual angst… And in this interlude there's a harmless spurge of fluff. See if you can find it. *grins* I dare ya.
Dedication: Once again, thank you all for making me a happy little offer. To Ani-chan, *shakes head* you always have the most interesting reviews. To oneechan, thanks *winks* for finally e-mailing me. And to my twin star Starlight-oneechan , you're just too *cool* dear.
Special Thanks: Thank you to all those who have been staying loyal to the story since day one, especially to Silver Wing, Crystal, and everyone else who I can't remember. It means a lot to me. Also to Starlight-oneechan for beta reading this crazy stuff, thank you dear.
See End for Notes… Thoughts are indicated in Italic, Flashbacks are in Bold
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Chapter 13: I Found Purgatory
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Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it inflames the great.
Christopher Marlowe
She found him outside in the balcony to the nurses' station, overlooking the miniature gardens. He stood with her back to her, hands gripping the cool metal bar of the edge. Heero had changed, she could feel the energy around him. Conflict, hardship, pick any one. She could feel the despair radiating from his body. She had heard about Noventa's death, news traveling fast. But she couldn't understand why he had-
"I did it so I could understand you when you returned."
She said nothing, eyes watching him. Taller, leaner, his eyes were now a piercing blue almost like a tiger stalking it's prey. She being the prey. She reached out, taking his hand in hers. Her long slender fingers traced over the calluses and cuts. He took up the sword. Her eyes met his. For me, he went back to learn the sword. Why?
"You know why, Relena."
She sighed, bringing his hand to her cheek. Jagged against silk, his fingers moved in a caress of small circles. Her eyes closed. Their relationship had always been different then other. Always highly dependent on the emotions that surrounded them, but now it was different. Now, it was like a primal need for her to be near Heero. Possession, she belong to him as he belonged to her. Basic need.
She looked up. "I know why you went Heero, but-"
"It wouldn't have been fair. We would have been at two different levels if we were to continue. I need to understand myself, so that I would be willing and ready for you when you came back."
"But was this-" She paused, her hand reached up to his cheek, tracing the crisscrossed scar. She felt him ease at her touch. In the back of her mind, she understood and even knew what he had done. But…
"Was it worth it?"
"Again."
Blood was dripping down the palms of his hand as he picked up the katana once more. Determination must be a strength. I have to get through this. For me. For Relena. He planted his feet firmly onto the ground and shut his eyes, reenergizing the feel of battle in himself.
"Again, boy. Do you want to accept failure?"
"Iie," he hissed. "I cannot accept any form of failure."
"Good."
And once more the clashes of the swords began.
"There was a man in Japan, a kind old man with a unrelinquishing spirit. He was a swordsman long before the war. He taught those who wanted to learn old customs, mainly boys who wanted more meaning in their lives. But with me, it was different… With me it was teaching the concept of *living*."
"The sword is a life of honor. You must really love this girl to take it upon yourself, boy."
He nodded, fingering the newly applied bandages to his palms. His eyes closed as thoughts of Relena invaded his mind. Where was she? How long would he have to wait?
"Patience isn't called a virtue for nothing, baka. Just remember one simple thing. You've accepted her and what she may become, but you need to also accept the fact that you too are changing. Keep this question close to your heart. Would you do *absolutely* anything for her?"
His blue eyes narrowed. "Anything and everything."
"You've protected me long enough, Relena. Let me be the one to protect you."
She chuckled, rolling her eyes. "Even if I said no, you'd do it regardless. So what does my answer matter anyway?"
"It matters to me," Heero whispered, fingers tangling themselves in her hair. He pulled the ribbon lose, her hair falling around her shoulders.
"You think you're in love with my hair at this rate."
"Koi…," he growled.
"Then love her, you fool. Love her like you haven't love anyone before. Not everyone gets a chance like you have. Do not let it slip through your fingers… Regret is only but a weakness for a warrior…"
For a brief moment, the two looked nothing more than a pair of young lovers. No pain, no guilt, just the two of them alone. For a brief moment, they could be free…
"Behind every strong man, there's an even stronger woman…"
**
"You can't hide in here forever."
Merian rolled her head over on the pillow, eyes meeting the smoky-violet eyes of Catherine. The other woman sat beside her bed, fingering a knife.
"You're a satanic bitch. Obviously, I can't move. Remember, I pulled the goddamn needles out to give the son-of-bitch a piece of my mind."
Catherine rolled her eyes. "I still think that you're hiding in here. It doesn't take this long to recover. You and I both know that. Chang's dead. Except it and face the facts."
Merian hissed, pushing herself up on one arm and ignoring the screeching pain. Nothing mattered anymore. "Do think I should dishonor my husband and just go ahead and kill every bastard that's robbed someone of life." She watched as Catherine moved the knife in front of her, the silver blade taunting her ruthlessly. She felt her fingers began to flex, slowly moving towards the other woman's outstretched hand.
"Take it and end it. There's no reason for you to be here if you're going to feel sorry for yourself."
She said nothing.
"Take it, Mer. Take it, that's all ya gotta do."
End it. What does it matter?
"Take it."
He's gone. Normalcy is gone. What do I have left?
"Just take-"
She grabbed the knife and slammed into the night table beside her bed, pieces of wood shooting out. She looked down at her hands, blood trickling down her palms from a new cut that was formed.
"Good."
Merian's eyes blazed with anger when Catherine nodded her head in satisfaction. What the fuck is she-? Catherine stood and headed for the door.
"We're in a war, remember that. Mourning is at the end."
Blood will be shed.
**
"This is how you do recruiting?"
Dorothy rolled her eyes, cursing at the son of a bitch who had stuck her on a recruiting mission with Maxwell. She nodded and watched as he scowled.
"I could be-"
"Having wild, passionate monkey-love with one of my best friends? Please."
"Quatre not giving you any?"
She smacked him. "I swear you act like you're fucking four! Sit down and shut up." Her eyes wandered around the loud bar, looking for any faces she could recognize. This is the last time I let Doc. talk me into a recruiting mission. This is bullshit. Her eyes widened in recognition and her lips curved into a feral smile.
"Maxwell…"
The pilot of Gundam model 02 shrunk back into his seat.
"Ah, hell no…"
**
Author's Notes/References:
Okay, so I lied. It's not an interlude, it's the next chapter. But it was with all good intent. I got to thinking and well, an interlude wouldn't fit right about now. *holds hands in the air* You'll find out how Heero got the scar, I promise. I'm going to do one of those pre-battle hang out chappies. You'll find out!
Another thing, Heero and Relena are in love. Just want to make that clear, I'm not going to kill either of them. *crosses arms at chest and humphs* Especially not Heero, that comments for you Ani-chan. So again, neither of them are going to die. And while on the subject of who's gonna die next, thanks for all the interesting comments and e-mails 'cause they make my day. *shakes head* And please people, the threats don't work on me. I *will* kill whoever's next.
I didn't mean for Catherine to be like a heartless bitch, it's part of the personality. Merian at that point wasn't fully turned until she was forced to face her problems/fears head on. She was being a bit of a coward understandably, but then again she had every right to be. Cat was just, well pushing her a little bit.
The Rurouni Kenshin references will be explained in the next interlude. I promise you won't have to wait much longer, but this is the way it's going to be with the direction I'm taking.
E-mails, reviews and other comments are welcomed. Oh and 'neechan, go right ahead with your idea I'll be waiting.