Even Though It's Painful...Always

by Kara

*Epilogue up--Complete!* 2024--The virus is gone, and Max and Logan finally have a chance to make their life together. But family problems and the rise of Manticore complicate the issue...

2. A Long Way to Run

Even Though It's Painful, Always…

Chapter Two: Long Way to Run

Are these times contagious

I've never been this bored before

Is this the prize I've waited for

Now as the hours passing

There's nothing left here to insure

I long to find a messenger

Have I got a long way to run

Yeah, I run

Is there a cure among us

From this processed sanity

I weaken with each voice that sings

In this world of purchase

I'm going to buy back memories

To awaken some old qualities

Have I got a long way to run

Yeah, I run

--Collective Soul, Run

As they entered the restaurant on the waterfront, Logan had to try hard not to grin. Max and Jondy flanked his wheelchair on either side, both dressed so impeccably in conservative sweaters and skirts that he doubted even Aunt Margot could find a fault with them. Max had thrown a fit royale, much to Jondy's amusement, when he'd explained the dress code. But she and Jondy had both turned up this morning dressed so well that Logan thought a boutique in the Mall might be missing a few outfits…

Bennett and Marianne waved from their table by the window, but his beloved aunt only wore her usual frosty smile. Since the fall of Cale Enterprise and the trust that had given her the wealthy edge, Margot Cale had turned into a bitter woman. Logan knew that Bennett and Marianne survived, mostly due to the fact that Bennett was actually putting his Yale law degree to use, and Marianne subsidized his income with her teacher's salary. But Aunt Margot--she had to depend on the kindness of strangers, living off stock-option remainders and what she could scrounge from her once decadent lifestyle.

"Merry Christmas, Aunt Margot." As he rolled by the woman, he dropped a light kiss on her cheek. His aunt had turned haggard in the past four years. There were streaks of gray in her blond hair that coloring just wouldn't hide. Though she still had the last vestiges of beauty, she couldn't use the glamour of wealth anymore. Compared to faded Margot, Max and Jondy shone like the sun.

"Merry Christmas, Logan." Her smile softened a bit, making him wonder if the old bitch really did have feelings in that calculating heart of hers. It wasn't as if she was a cold-blooded killer like his Uncle Jonas. Maybe Aunt Margot really was just blinded by money. "And Max. It's so good to see you again, dear." His aunt stood, giving Max the required kiss to each cheek.

"How French of you, Margot. You've reminded me of how much I miss the Gallic air," Max drawled, looking at his aunt through her dark eyelashes. For someone of an unconventional upbringing, Max could be as snide and arrogant as any of his aunt's society.

But Max must have noticed the pained look that crossed over Logan's face, because she immediately gave his aunt a more apologetic look. "Merry Christmas, Margot," she amended, returning the required kiss.

"And who is this delightful young woman?" Bennett broke in. Logan shot his cousin a grateful look. "I'm Bennett Cale, as my scoundrel cousin has doubtlessly forgotten to tell you. And this is my wife, Marianne."

Logan laughed softly at the wince on Bennett's face as he shook Jondy's hand. "Jondy Guevara," Max's sister said smoothly, giving his cousin her most ingenuous blue-eyed look. Logan could see where Max had picked that one up, having fallen prey to it often enough himself. "Of the Greenwich Guevaras."

Marianne coughed to cover a smile. "Of course," she said "Sit down, please. Max rarely speaks of her family, so we were very interested to meet you."

Max automatically moved the chair away from the head of the table for him, then slid into the chair to his right. Her hand found his under the table. "We're your basic family, so there isn't much to talk about," she said in a noncommittal tone. "How's your class, Marianne?"

But Aunt Margot wasn't going to let it drop. "You look nothing alike, dear. It's almost hard to believe that you are sisters." The snide look returned to his aunt's face.

"We don't really like to talk about that." Jondy smiled sweetly, masking the fact that she was holding Max down by straightening the locket on Max's chain. "What with it being highly confidential information--the experiment, and the recombinant DNA... Daddy didn't like people to know. Military secrets and all that."

Logan could see his aunt trying to digest that information.

"So your father wasn't the mailman?" Bennett grinned at Jondy conspiratorially.

Luckily for Logan, his cousin had inherited a sense of humor from somewhere- obviously not from the Cale side…

Jondy grinned back. "That's always my second tactic. I leave the alien hybrid theory for late nights at the bar." She shrugged, her face serious again. "Our parents couldn't have children, so they adopted. It wasn't a horrid upbringing--Greenwich in summer, tea at the Compound in Hyannisport…You know, the usual. Our father was military--a colonel--so we moved around a lot." Max choked at that. Jondy shot her sister a dirty look before continuing. "Our parents died when we were young, and we were split up. Now, we get together when we can." Giving her sister a last squeeze about the shoulders, Jondy sat back, flashing Logan a quick smile.

After four years with Max, Logan thought that nothing would surprise him anymore. Apparently, he was wrong. Jondy was an amazing woman, but that was almost expected, since she was Max's favorite sister.

"I remember when Logan's mother died. It was a tragedy--she was a beautiful woman. You were what, eleven, Logan?" There was almost a wistful look on his aunt's face. "His father didn't last too long after that."

"Four years, Aunt Margot." Four years of hell, living with a drunk father who thought mourning was for women and pansies--a man who considered his son little better than a mama's boy. "I was fifteen when they sent me to live with you." Followed by another two years of living a rich boy's wet dream, playing the same tired social intrigue games… College had been a dream for Logan. AP classes and summer session allowed him to finish Yale in three years--three years away from his family, that itself was a blessing. But a BA in journalism only did so much in a Post-Pulse world. His degree meant nothing to his pedigreed family. The work he accomplished through his articles and exposes only brought his family's opinion of him down. But none of it really mattered in those years. It wasn't until he was thirty-one that his world took the great dramatic turn, when a gen- synthed cat burglar decided to fall through his skylight one night…

"That's a lovely locket you've got on, Max. Might I see it?" The ice returned to his aunt's voice as she reached out one thin hand across the table.

Max stood, catching on to Aunt Margot's game. Logan watched as Max took the chain, holding the locket closer to Aunt Margot's elegant nose. "It was Logan's mother's. See? On the back, his father engraved the date." Without letting his aunt touch it, Max turned the locket over. Logan didn't need to look to know what the engraving said. "For Sara, for her greatest gift. November 11, 1988."

Aunt Margot sniffed, almost as if she knew she was defeated. "I thought it was familiar," his aunt said, not meeting anyone's eyes. "It's beautiful."

With a cat's look of satisfaction, Max sat back beside him. "Yes, it is."

"Almost as beautiful as the woman who wears it," Logan whispered in her ear. He reached out with one hand to rub the back of her neck. His fingers lightly traced the puckered scar just below her barcode.

"If Logan gave you the locket, Max, I'm surprised he hasn't given you a ring yet." Again, his Aunt Margot wore her smug look. "Unless you won't marry him now that his money is gone."

There was a stunned silence. Logan and Jondy both reached out at the same time for Max's shoulders, in case she decided to take a flying leap over the table to tackle his aunt to the ground.

"Bennett took almost five years to propose to me," Marianne spoke up, breaking the silence. "In this day, isn't it better to make sure that the one you marry is the right one?" Logan saw her smile at Bennett, reaching for his cousin's hand. "Not that I wasn't sure."

"Our sister married young," Jondy said, an almost lost look in her eyes. "She knew right away that Charlie was the one, and they had five years together, and a beautiful little boy."

Marianne leaned forward, Margot forgotten. "What happened?"

"She died." Max's voice was flat. "And now, her husband is left alone, and my nephew grows up without his mother."

Logan knew that what happened to Tinga still ate at Max. The few night she did sleep, she still woke up sometimes, sobbing for Tinga. And in a rare moment of weakness, Lydecker had actually told him about finding Max, cradling Tinga's body in her arms, crying in a way that Lydecker never thought his kids would. The great Colonel himself had needed a moment to compose himself, for the one time in his life when he might have regretted what he did to the X-5s.

Jondy put her arm around Max's shoulders, giving Logan's family a protective glare. In those fierce blue eyes, Logan could see the aftermath of Manticore and how, to their dying day, Max and her siblings would protect and defend each other.

"Quite the usual Cale Christmas," he cracked. And it was. His family put on a very nonchalant and uncaring appearance, but that was only because Aunt Margot refused to air dirty laundry in public.

Bennett returned his half-hearted smile, probably remembering the last few Christmases with Logan's father. No doubt the family would never forget Logan Robert Cale, Sr, throwing an entire bottle of his best brandy at his younger brother's head. Family. If it didn't drive you mad or try to kill you…

"Perhaps the ladies are hungry," Bennett suggested. "It looks like the buffet line has lightened up a bit. Would you care to join me, Max? Jondy?" If Logan knew anything, it was that the way to Max's heart was through her stomach, and that his dark angel would never refuse an offer of food.

She stood gracefully, taking his cousin's arm as if she were born a society lady. Jondy followed, a scant second behind, with the same feline grace. Bennett made quite a sight framed by the two women--Jondy, with her slight, ethereal beauty, and Max, her darker, more seductive shadow. It was still hard, even now, for Logan to reconcile the fact that these two almost delicate women could easily take out the entire restaurant.

As Bennett gallantly led them to the buffet table, Aunt Margot turned to Logan. "I'm surprised she hasn't left yet, Logan. I didn't expect her to stick around after the money ran out. Apparently, your spinal injuries must not be as bad as we thought." Her eyes narrowed. "Unless she's supporting you now, since I doubt that petty journalism of yours actually pays."

Logan clenched the wheels of his wheelchair, thanking God that he didn't have Max's strength or Zack's temper. It was easy enough to imagine snapping his aunt's skinny neck.

"I think that's a bit uncalled for, don't you, Aunt Margot?" Sometimes not rising to the bait worked with Max, when she worked herself up into one of her rages. But his aunt was the queen of cold, and knew the tricks. Logan was all too familiar with her tactics after years of living in her house.

"Uncalled for? You, my nephew, are probably the only hope for a Cale heir. Bennett's wife is barren, and Robert and Jordan are fools. Uncalled for is you not fulfilling your family obligations by marrying the tramp you've shacked up with for the past five years." His aunt's voice had a chilly undercurrent to it, though her face still wore a mask of indifferent civility. "My son wastes his law degree on the dregs of society, and my husband was gunned down for who knows what reason, while my only nephew probably sold out his own family to that Eyes Only. Tell me that you weren't behind your uncle's death, Logan. You loved him about as much as he loved your father."

For the second time, he was glad that Max was far away. Logan closed his eyes, knuckles white as they clenched the steel wheels of his chair.

"How the mighty Cale have fallen!" his aunt's voice mocked. "Logan, Sr, dead at forty-five, a worthless drunk. Jonas, shot in the back by his own family. Logan, Jr, a cripple, and Bennett and his brothers, as worthless as their cousin." Margot's voice dropped. "A cripple, Logan. Don't try to hide behind your woman and your lifestyle. No matter what you do, you'll always be a cripple. And someday, that little Max of yours will realize that."

He lunged across the table, reaching for her throat.

"Logan!" He heard a plate drop, and then Max's arms were around him, holding him back against the chair.

"Take that back, you bitch," he growled. He struggled against Max's grip. "You ruined my mother's life. Your husband turned my father against her, and that killed her." Hot tears burned in his eyes, but Logan didn't care. "And if you ever say a word against the woman I love again, I swear I'll kill you." Logan shrugged off Max's hands and leaned towards his aunt. "I had nothing to do with the death of Uncle Jonas. He brought that on himself."

He pushed away from the table, wheeling his chair around. "Sorry, Max, I don't feel hungry anymore."

As Logan rolled away, he saw Bennett and Jondy coming back from the buffet, plates in hand. Jondy took one look at him before handing her plate to Bennett. "It was nice meeting you. Apparently, we're leaving now."

"Keep in mind what I said. If you ever need anything…" His cousin trailed off, looking between Logan and the commotion at the table behind them. "I'm sorry, Logan."

He shrugged. "A typical Cale Christmas. The more things change…"

Bennett smiled a little. "The more Mother stays the same."

~*~*~*~*~

The drive back was silent. Logan's hands clutched the wheel of the Aztek as he replayed the conversation in his mind.

"Why do you put up with this shit?" Looking over at the passenger seat, Logan could see Max's arms crossed over her chest, a scowl on her face. "It's not like you need them."

"Because they're my family," he said carefully, turning his eyes back to the road. They paused at the Sector Nine checkpoint, and Logan flashed his pass. "You put up with the same thing from Zack for years."

He could hear Jondy make a sound of protest from the back seat.

"Yeah, and Zack gave up his life for me," Max pointed out. "Your uncle tried to kill you."

Zack was still a sore point, even after all these years. He was still a rival, even now, even though Max had never seen him as anything but a brother. "Zack didn't exactly look at you as a little sister, Max. You think he'd turn himself back into Manticore for anyone? He gave up his life for you--not just once, but twice."

"Three times," Jondy said softly. "The escape."

He could hear Max rattling the door. Before she could jump out, he locked the doors. Thank God for the foresight of child safety locks, even on the front passenger door…

"Unlock the door, Logan." Max's voice was dangerously quiet. "Unlock the fucking door before I break it off the hinges."

He pulled over, shutting off the engine. The eyes that met his were dark with fury. "You're not getting out of this car, Max. Not until we talk this out."

"Not until we fight this out? I love you, Logan, but that won't keep me from getting medieval on your ass." Damn, she was beautiful when she was angry. "Why do you put up with their shit? Your family's done nothing but tramp all over you since your father died. There's no money left. There's no reason for you to keep holding on to something that's not there."

"Like you did with your brothers and sisters, even after Zack wouldn't let you stay together?" It was a low blow, Logan knew, but there were times when he felt like being petty. And this was something that had to be said.

"I was obeying orders." From the stubborn set of her jaw, Logan knew she was clenching her teeth. "The Colonel said that our duty was to our family, and my objective was to find them. They were all I had. Some of us weren't born rich white boys with superhero complexes." She looked at him out of the corner of her eyes.

It always came down to this. Manticore versus Sector 9. A penthouse on the east side against military barracks. Logan couldn't imagine her childhood anymore than she could comprehend his. But they tried. They both tried.

"Idiots. You're both fucking idiots, you realize that, right?" Jondy broke in. "Dammit! I should let Original Cindy put a smackdown on both your asses. Don't you get it?" She reached over Logan's seat, fumbling for the locking mechanism. He heard a click as the door locks opened. "I can personally name eight people who'd give their lives for what you guys have. We all have issues. Get over it. Either love each other, or stop taking for granted how good you've really got it." And the door slammed shut as Jondy stumbled out of the car.

There was silence.

"Logan."



"Max."

Max chuckled, which was a good sign. It was even better when a small hand reached out for his. "I'm sorry," she said finally, still looking straight ahead. "I guess I--"

"Yeah, me too." He squeezed her hand. "Family…" He reached over, unbuckling her seatbelt. With one swift movement equal to any X-5s, he shifted her slight weight into his lap. "You're my family, more than they ever were, and as much as I try to separate myself from them, part of me still needs their approval." He buried his face in her curls. "I'm sorry, Max."

One arm reached up, her hand rubbing the back of his neck. Her eyes were downcast, a lost look on her face. Angels shouldn't look so lost. "Why haven't you asked me yet?" she asked in a small voice.

"Asked you?" He tipped her face up, forcing her to look at him. Then he remembered what his Aunt Margot said, the only question he hadn't asked her yet. "Max, this is gonna sound bad, but…can this wait til we get back? I promise, I'll answer you then. There's just something I need to do."

His heart broke as her face fell. Then, she composed herself and put on her blank Manticore face again. "Yeah." She slipped out of his lap and over the manual shift into the passenger seat. "I get it."

With a sigh, Logan turned the Aztek back on, and moved out into traffic.

~*~*~*~*~

The apartment seemed empty when they got back. Logan rolled his wheelchair into the front room and locked the brakes. It felt good to stand again. It would have felt better to stand in the restaurant and walk out, but there were too many problems that would cause among the Cales--problems that weren't really worth five minutes of petty gratitude at the shocked looks on his family's faces. Max kicked off her heels and flounced over to the couch. Before she sat down though, she walked back over and picked up her shoes, lining them up neatly against the wall next to a pair of even smaller blue heels. Manticore. It was in everything she did, even the small things.

Logan watched as Max walked over to her favorite chair by the window and curled herself up in it. The look she wore on her face was the same one he'd seen a thousand times when she was thinking about her family and her past. He'd seen it on Alec's too, whenever anyone mentioned the name Rachael. It was a resigned face, as if she knew what her doom was, and how little chance there was at escaping it. But even transgenic soldiers deserved the occasional happily ever after...didn't they?

The door to the guestroom opened, and Jondy padded out on silent bare feet. She'd washed the makeup off her face, and her light brown hair was down again. It was long now, longer than he'd ever seen it over the past three years. It almost hung to her waist, making her look younger than she was-- even younger than Max. Without a word, she handed him a small wrapped box, a box he recognized as his Christmas present to Max.

"I thought you might want this," she said. He could read nothing from her face, wearing the same blank mask that he saw on Max's face sometimes. Manticore, even in the small things.

With his heart beating so hard that he could almost feel it in his throat, Logan turned and knelt in front of Max's chair. Though he couldn't feel the hard wood of the floor beneath his knees, its solidity gave him comfort. "Max," he said softly. "I want to explain why I never asked before."

She looked at him, her brown eyes full of shadows and tears. The look in her eyes made him remember another night, when he'd held her dying body in his arms and watched her slip away from him--a long way to run, a long way back from where she'd been… How many men can say that they've seen their lovers die and were lucky enough to have them come back to life? In that moment, Max reminded him of a song his mother once sang, about a woman doomed to dance in the shadows--child of the shadows. "She dances in the shadows, like a shadow is her hair," he sang softly, twisting one of her curls around his fingers. "Her eyes hold midnight captive, like a phantom fell and fair…"

"You're a poet and a songwriter." The edges of her full lips curled up.

"I can't claim that poetry, Max. My mother used to sing it. She got it from a book of stories that she used to read me, about this kingdom called Valdemar…"

"Were there princes in it?" In spite of herself, she looked interested, and for a moment, Logan could almost see the child she might have been, at Manticore.

He smiled, trying to remember. "There weren't princes, but there were Heralds. The Heralds were heroes who rode white horses."

There was the sound of a snort from the direction of the doorway. "Told Max that the horses would be white," he could hear Jondy mutter.

He turned back to the woman in the chair and handed her the box. "I didn't ask before, Max, because I was going to do this right." He waited until she tore off the wrapping paper, holding the wooden box in her hands, almost as if she didn't know what to do with it. "Open it," he whispered.

The sounds of Sibelius' Valse Triste filled the room. Max's eyes widened as a tiny dancer popped up, whirling in time to the music. She chuckled softly when she noticed that the dancer wore a long red strapless dress, and had dark curls.

"You remembered." She smiled this time, a genuine smile.

He reached out to rub the back of her neck, his thumb tracing the line of her cheek. "How could I ever forget?"

She reached into the box, and pulled out a wadded up handkerchief. "Is this supposed to be a hint or something?" Max asked lightly, breaking the mood. "You coulda just told me to blow my nose. They did teach us how at Manticore."

"Open it," he said again. Jondy must have put it in the music box, somehow figuring out his plan. Logan shifted his weight to one knee, silently thanking a former superhero named Phil for his gift of the exoskeleton. He swallowed, knowing there was no turning back. "When I asked you, I had it all planned out. I was going to have you open this, and I was going to tell you that marriage is an act of daring, requiring that we be brave enough to promise ourselves to someone else."

Max's lips twitched. "Does it require that we entrust our most secret inner selves to them?" Her brown eyes were suspiciously bright.

He chuckled. "Yeah, it does. But sometimes you're lucky enough to find that person. You cross paths by fate--"

"But become partners by choice," Max finished softly. She looked down at the handkerchief in her hands. "Should I open it now?"

He nodded, suddenly not sure if his voice would work.

As Max unfolded the handkerchief, she stroked it. "Pure silk. I could fence this for 50, easy." Her voice sounded shaky. When the box fell into her lap, Logan noticed that her strong, slender hands seemed about as stable as her voice. With a quick look at him, she opened it. "If this is a Cracker Jack prize, I'm gonna kick your ass," she warned.

"I didn't ask you, because I wanted to wait until you were ready, and it was perfect," he whispered. "When you died that night…when you tried to tell me, and I kept saying we'd have time later… I wanted the fairy tale moment that you never had, before I asked you if you'd embark with me on the greatest adventure two people can share." He took the ring out of the box, and held it up to her. "I wanted to be able to get down on one knee, and do things the right way."

She took the ring, holding it up to the light. For a moment, he was afraid she was going to refuse. "Good clarity, a flawless stone…" Max said finally, a silly smile on her face. "This would definitely get me a new tranny for my baby."

Logan heard another snort from behind him. "I'd even planned to promise never to hang my boxers on your motorcycle," he said, matching her grin. "She might even be able to stay in the apartment. In the guestroom."

"Of course." Her eyes laughed. "So are you gonna ask, or are you just gonna tell me about it?"

Shifting his weight slightly, Logan took the ring from her hand and slipped it on her finger. He could feel tears sliding down his face, but for once, he didn't give a shit about what his family would think. "Will you marry me, Max?"

And with a little chuckle and a tear sliding down the end of her nose, his forever dark angel nodded yes.

~*~*~*~

Jondy watched, clinging to the doorway. Max and Logan weren't kissing. They didn't need to. They just sat there, foreheads pressed together, staring at each other. Tinga gave Charlie the same look. Tinga and Charlie had clung together the same way. Love. Daring to take the chance despite the cost. Daring to be normal, despite the risk of what shadows you brought with you to the table. Letting yourself grow comfortable and settle. Tinga always thought it was worth it, but that wasn't a price that Jondy wanted to pay. Not yet.

They'd been running all their lives, but her baby sister seemed to have run further than most of them. And it wasn't like Logan didn't know what he was getting himself into. He'd already been host to four or five impromptu X-5 gatherings and war councils. Doubtless, he would see several more. And though he didn't have a barcode, Jondy still thought of him as a brother. He wasn't exactly a prince, but he was the kind of man that Maxie needed. He listened in ways Zack never did. But Logan had never shouldered half the burdens of their big brother. Logan had never seen the inside of Manticore.

It might work out. Logan brought out the serious side of her baby sister, and Max helped The Former Rich Boy Known As Logan lighten up a little. They gave each other a cause and a reason to live. They were good for each other. And with love that strong…

It would have never been that way with Zack. Even if Zack had loved her half as much as he'd loved Max, it could have never been--not for two X-5s. Their child was proof of that--the misshapen fetus that she'd miscarried at four months and buried somewhere near Angel's Camp in the Sierras. If there had never been a Manticore, and if Zack had been able to live a life for himself, and if there hadn't been twelve siblings that he had to watch over, it might have been different. There was no guarantee that Logan and Max would beat the odds, considering Charlie and Tinga, Zane and Samantha. Even with Krit and Syl knocking it right now… Manticore cursed whatever it touched.

But Jondy wouldn't let her visions of doom cloud the picture before her. They could have their moment of happiness, and use that to strengthen them for the days to come. Maybe it would work out. Maybe there would come a day when they could stop running. They had a long way to run yet…

And in the distance, she couldn't help hearing the cry of a crow--just a bird…it was just a bird…

~*~*~*~*~*~

Max sat back on the couch, admiring the way the ring sparkled on her finger. Even in her dingy-ass apartment, the diamond seemed to have a light of its own. She couldn't help taking it off her finger to read the inscription inside. Forever eyes. Dark. My angel. If she wasn't a romantic sap now, she was definitely in the running for candidacy.

Something deep in the pit of her stomach told her to fling the ring into the darkest hole she could find, and blaze out of the city as fast as her Ninja would carry her. Soldiers didn't get attached to civvies. Soldiers didn't let their hearts get in the way of the objective. The solder that got attached allowed himself to be weak and open to attack.

But sometimes soldiers got tired of fighting and running and hiding. And sometimes soldiers had to be vulnerable, if only to snatch at their one chance at happiness. She lost Logan once. Max didn't know if she could live through it again. She'd spent a long time running. Everyone had to stop sometime.

She could hear Jondy snickering at her from across the room, where she sat painting her toenails, one foot propped up on the footrest of her bike. Original Cindy would be proud that one of Max's sisters enjoyed the finer things in life. Her Christmas gift for Original Cindy, some old Xena comic book Logan found, still sat wrapped up under their tree. Cindy named the poor dead thing Charlie Brown for some reason, and just stared at her when Max asked why. Maybe it was a lesbian thing.

"It's not gonna get any bigger or brighter, Maxie, no matter how many times you look at it." Jondy scooted across the floor, one foot held out in front of her. "Though Logan does have good taste."

"He tastes good too." Max bit her lip when she realized what she'd said. At least she didn't blush. Jondy, with her fairer skin that had always burned on long missions outside, turned bright red.

"There are things I don't need to know, baby sister."

"But did I do right?" Max slipped the ring back on her finger. It was conspicuous, even in the dimmer light of her small apartment. "It's like a giant beacon saying 'Here I am, Lydecker.'"

Jondy wiggled her now scarlet toes with a sigh. "That's a decision you have to make for yourself, Max. You have to decide if you're ready, and if it's a risk worth taking." She shrugged. "I don't know if I could take it, but you also love Logan. And you could always think of it as one way of getting Manticore's bitch. You're strong enough to break training. Stronger than any of us." Propping her other foot up on the couch, she began painstakingly painting her other toes. "It's been way too long… Can't Logan have any cute single friends?"

Max plopped down on the floor next to her sister. "Bling's single, I think. I dunno about Alec. He and Asha get it off and on so much that it's like one of those old soap operas or some shit. He's like almost family anyway." She laughed at the face Jondy made. The few times her sister met the other X-5, Jondy wasn't impressed. "Sketchy's single again, I think. But I wouldn't wish Sketchy on anyone…even Normal."

"Bennett was kinda hot in that dork way," Jondy said, a thoughtful look on her face. "Too bad he's married. He's got brothers though, right?"

"And they all take after Margot." She played with the locket, feeling restless. "Robert was in rehab for a while, and Jordan's in Vegas, screwing everything in sight."

"Like Tawny."

Max laughed. "Exactly like Tawny." Tawny was third oldest-second oldest, now-and he'd never really adapted to life outside of Manticore. He drank, he fucked, he looked at life like it was a party he had to barrel through at 180 mph. But like a good soldier, he covered his tracks, and no one had gotten hurt…yet. Funny how he seemed to take the same attitude towards life that Alec did. Max was just glad she only had to deal with one in her life at a time.

Automatically, the two leaned towards each other. It was funny how instinctive it was, and how fast she fell back into Manticore habits with Jondy around. But you can't go back and forget the first nine years of your life, especially when they're burnt into your brain and genetic code. That was how Cindy found them, a while later, as she jingled in the door.

"Hey, boo. Hey, sugar. Why the long faces? Santa Claus didn't bring you a new carburetor for your babies?" Cindy kicked off her shoes and threw her red hat onto her bed, bells ringing as it sailed through the air. "Ain't nothing wrong with your family?"

Max shook her head. "I just get depressed at Christmas. All those years I missed out on turkey dinners and presents." She forced herself to smile.

Original Cindy flopped down on the couch behind them, twining her fingers in Max's hair. "Logan's family that bad, boo? You need Original Cindy to put a smackdown on them?"

"I'll help," Jondy volunteered. "Eva's elbow-pop could work wonders on Margot's anality." Looking down at her sister's face, Max could see Jondy's blue eyes shine with anticipation, the same way she used to look when they had E and E drills. "One little crack to the neck, and a jab with the elbow in the right place…" Jondy's small hands mimed the twist, making Original Cindy wince.

"Aiight, Original Cindy see you got your own back covered." Max could feel Original Cindy's hair brushing her shoulders as her best friend leaned forward, peering at her hand. Her roommate was quiet for a few moments. " 'Zat what I think it is, boo?"

Turning her head back, Max met Cindy's eyes. She could feel a smile creeping up on her face, and a ball of warmth filling her stomach. She opened her mouth to speak, but words wouldn't come. Maybe she had made the right decision.

Cindy chuckled, falling to the floor beside them. She reached out to examine the ring. "Damn, Max. When your man does something, that boy does it fine 'n fly. All Original Cindy can say is it's 'bout time, boo." Cindy's arm settled around Max. "And if anyone don't deserve to be happy…"

"And if he doesn't make you happy, little sister," Jondy added, her arm encircling Max from the other side, "we've got your back."

"Does that mean you'll wear that tight little catsuit?" Cindy said, breaking the mood a bit. "Two souped-up bitches in black leather is every lesbian's dream, aiight?"

"Three women on the floor together is probably every man's dream," Jondy retorted with a laugh.

Max settled back against the couch, letting herself be surrounded by her sisters' love. This was family. This was what she'd searched for her whole life-total love and acceptance of what she was, and what she would always be. Shit would hit the fan to break her tranquility, but for this moment… These were the two women who loved her best and who'd seen her at her worst, and nothing would ever change that.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Logan wheeled himself down the hallway, carefully balancing a box of food on his lap. Bling followed behind, carrying the rest of the groceries. He was still amazed that Max had volunteered to make food for her New Year's Eve party. He was even more amazed that she'd decided to have one at all.

Taking his cue from Max over the years, Logan didn't even bother to knock. He twisted the doorknob with one hand and propelled his wheelchair through. At least the elevator had been working, and Bling was spared the chore of hauling both Logan's useless body, the wheelchair, and the food up six flights of stairs. Logan wasn't quite sure how Max managed to hotwire it to work in a condemned building, but he didn't question too much. He just thanked God for small favors, even ones as meaningless as electricity not browning out.

"Honey, I'm home!" he couldn't help calling out as he wheeled into the apartment. Jondy stuck her tongue out at him as she stirred something in a mixing bowl, flour on her nose.

"Sorry, we don't want any," she said, waving the batter-covered spoon at him as Bling closed the door.

"Speak for yourself." Max walked from the other side of the small kitchen, kissing Logan gently. "I want as much of it as I can get."

Jondy snorted. "TMI, baby sister. Way too much."

Original Cindy high-fived Jondy from the other end of the counter, where she stood stuffing a chicken. "Word, boo. Total word, aiight? Original Cindy's happy that you two finally got the wires uncrossed, but she don't need to get sick to her stomach, or she gonna put a smackdown on both your asses for all the romance dealio."

From behind him, Logan could've sworn that he heard Bling snicker as he set the bags on the table. "I've got errands to run. You girls need anything while I'm out?"

"A sweet and spicy homegirl with eyes like hot chocolate," Cindy automatically replied. "Wouldn't hurt if boo looks good in a catsuit too." She licked her lips, and then grinned. "If you find some paprika to rub on this chicken, Original Cindy would love you forever, boo."

Bling nodded. "Spices it is. Logan? Max? Flowers for a centerpiece, noise-makers?"

Logan noticed the blank look on both Max and Jondy's faces. "Noise-makers? You actually wanna draw attention to the party?" Jondy's voice sounded genuinely puzzled.

"No noisemakers then." It surprised Logan sometimes, that he actually forgot that there was a Manticore. Max and Jondy seemed so normal in some ways, until he was blatantly reminded that their childhood hadn't exactly been conventional. "Logan?" As Logan shook his head, Bling grinned. "I'll take that as my cue. Later, girls."

"Late!" three voices called out in response.

Logan hauled himself onto a stool next to Jondy. "Anything I can help with, MacDuff?"

She giggled at their inane little joke, brandishing the mixing spoon. "Watch out, or Max'll have a chocolate covered Logan if you aren't careful." Both she and Max wore their hair pulled up, barcodes clearly visible on their necks like black marks of Cain. "Maxie, toss me the sugar." Logan tried to ignore how close the spiraling Tupperware container came to hitting his head as Jondy caught it neatly in one hand. "Whatcha bring? Maybe you can find something to do in the bags."

Max was already rummaging through the box on the table. "A nice full- bodied Zinfadel, pre-Pulse," she said with a grin, laying the wine bottle on the table. "Raid Bennett's wine cellar?"

Normally, it would've been beneath his dignity to snort, but this was Max. "I think Aunt Margot got there first. This was a bottle Bennett promised me when we were in prep school, in honor of my engagement." Max didn't need to know how close he came to smashing the bottle after Daphne, and how Bennett had conveniently forgotten it existed by the time Valerie accepted his proposal.

She pulled out one of the baguettes, her hand seeming to automatically fall into 'ready' position as she held it upright. "Hey, Jondy, catch!" This time, a loaf of bread nearly missed hitting his ear.

Jondy caught the bread as easily as she'd caught the sugar, the loaf slipping through her fingers until she too gripped it like some edged weapon. Somehow, Logan doubted they'd played Knights of the Round Table as children. Even though it was bread, it somehow looked dangerous in Jondy's small hand.

"You challenging me, baby sister?" Her lips curled up into a grin, eyes gleaming.

"You two have serious competition issues, aiight?" Cindy remarked, still calmly stuffing her chicken. "Remind Original Cindy never to challenge her boos to foos-ball again."

Mixing spoon long-forgotten, Logan picked up the bowl of cake batter and began stirring. Jondy and Max approached each other in the empty space between the couch and the two motorcycles. "I challenge you," Max said, saluting her sister with the bread. Normally unwieldy, in Max's hands, the loaf sliced through the air as if it was a delicate rapier.

"Engarde!" Jondy struck out first, moving so fast that the air around the two seemed to blur. Both women moved with the grace of dancers and the skill of tai-chi masters. When Logan and his cousins had performed the same duels, they'd flung movie quotes about schwartzes and kung fu left and right. But with Jondy and Max, there was silence--all business, even in play.

Logan watched, mesmerized. It almost reminded him of the duels in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, between Michelle Yeoh and Zhang Ziyi. He'd been twelve when that movie came out, and had dragged his friends to see it eight times in the theater. Somehow, twelve-year old Logan Cale never thought he'd have his own personal ninja family at his beck and call.

Stroke for sword stroke, they parried each other's hits. Bread crumbs littered the faded carpet from the impact of baguette on baguette. Finally, the two had to call it a draw, a loaf of bread held at each throat.

Jondy laughed. "I'd forgotten how fast you are, baby sister. Being a super hero keeps you in shape."

Max grinned, panting a little. "I think I'm slowing down in my old age though. That actually tired me out. And I didn't try to throw you or anything." She laid the battered baguette back on the counter and leaned up against Logan. Wrapping an arm around her as he continued to stir, he could feel the way her chest heaved slightly. "Think Big Brother would be proud?"

Jondy's smile faltered for a moment, but it held as she took the mixing spoon from Logan's other hand. "He always was proud, Maxie." Logan could see her peering closer at Max. "You don't look too hot, baby sister. Go shower and lay down."

"But I'm not--" Max began to protest.

"Do it, soldier!" Jondy barked.

"Yessir." With a reluctant look on her face, Max pushed away his arm, moving towards the bathroom. There did seem to be a lethargy about her. She'd been sleeping more lately--four or five hours a night, instead of her usual one or two.

"She isn't…" Original Cindy trailed off, still wrist-deep in chicken. "Do you-"

Logan looked back in forth between the two women, obviously having missed the classes deciphering the secret language of women while he was at Yale. He watched as Jondy shrugged, looked thoughtful, and then said. "Maybe."

Then it was Original Cindy's turn to look thoughtful. "And he don't--"

"Not for us," Jondy answered with a shrug, not looking up from her cake batter. "She doesn't."

Cindy nodded and sighed. "Aiight, boo. You know."

Jondy laughed softly, but the sound seemed harsh to Logan's ears. "Yeah. I know."

"Makes me so glad I'm a lesbian," he thought he heard Cindy mutter.

Logan Cale didn't think of himself as the usual obtuse male. On occasion he got a little side-tracked and tended to over-focus on something, like a mission for Eyes Only. Occasionally, he even obsessed, but he remembered anniversaries and always took care to make sure that Max knew how much he loved her. But this…he couldn't help feeling like he was missing something important, and he didn't know if it was because he wasn't genetically- enhanced, or because he lacked the extra X chromosome.

Before he could ask, there was the unmistakable click of the front door lock being picked. Automatically, Jondy slid into ready position, placing herself in front of Logan. With one swift movement, she grabbed a knife from off the counter. Her free hand motioned for him to dive on cue. Cindy reached for a hockey stick sitting in the corner.

Logan tried not to shout as he felt something brush up behind him. "Shhhh," Max's voice said in his ear, laying a still-wet hand on his neck. Looking back, he could see that she'd wrapped herself in her robe, securing it shut with what looked like hair clips. She and Jondy exchanged nods as the door began to swing open.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The brief stay under cold water had helped pound the fatigue out of her muscles. Max had been a lot more tired lately. It wasn't like she was doing anything out of the ordinary. Half the nights she spent sitting up with Jondy, talking and listening. And yeah, she and Logan were going at it like rabbits, but that wasn't unusual. Her stamina was still up for doing it three or four times in a row…

She'd pulled her bathrobe around her when she heard the click of the tumblers and the sound of footsteps outside the door. There was a board that squeaked if you didn't step on it right. Jondy was already in 'ready' position when Max snuck out the door. She couldn't help feeling a little ridiculous. How many soldiers kicked ass dressed in faded blue bathrobes with little stars on them?

Jondy motioned quickly, nodding towards Cindy. Max tried not to laugh when she noticed her roommate standing, her smackdown hockey stick gripped tightly in both hands. Even Logan tensed, perched on the edge of the stool and ready to dive behind the counter. But Max quickly placed herself in front of her roommate, knowing Jondy had Logan covered.

The door opened slowly. From the sound of it, there were at least three people outside, maybe four. They walked lightly, so they were definitely trained well. But the first one didn't notice the slight dip in the doorway, and tripped into the room. As the first body fell through the doorway, Max launched herself, taking care to hit low and Jondy tackled high.

"Max, it's me!" Rolling on top of the intruder on the floor, she realized that she knew the voice.

"Krit?" Dark brown eyes met her own in a face that always startled her with its similarity to her own.

He grinned. "Happy New Year, big sister. Jondy said something about you throwing a party?"

She hugged him tight before she realized that she was still laying on top of him, and he was probably getting a great view down her bathrobe. Manticore never had any qualms about shoving soldiers together in mixed-sex showers, but that had been years ago, before puberty and the outside world intervened. She stood, pulling Krit's body up with her. He reached out, hugging her again. "Good to see you, baby brother."

It wasn't until recently that they'd found out their actual ages. Max wasn't surprised that she was the youngest girl, but she'd never known Krit was even younger, if only by days. Lydecker himself had called her 'youngest.' Years of habit were hard to shake off.

Looking behind her brother, she recognized the other three as they filed into her apartment. Syl followed Krit at arm's length, and Max couldn't help noticing how the two kept in constant physical touch with each other. Zane didn't say anything as he swept her up into a bear hug, swinging her around.

"Millie?" His dog was noticeably absent.

He shook his head, his long brown hair hiding his face for a moment. "Mille fought her last battle right after Christmas." Though he wore the carefully-schooled Manticore mask, Max could see the hurt in his gray eyes. "It's the way of the wheel. She's found her peace and gone to a better place."

"All dogs go to heaven," the last figure quipped as he maneuvered between Krit and Zane. Tawny's amber-gold eyes didn't light up the way Zane's had, but he still gave her a hard hug. "Happy Holidays, baby sister."

Things were still strained at best with Tawny. Max wasn't half the hard- ass that Zack had been about location and always keeping vigilant, but Tawny seemed to fight her in ways he'd never fought Zack. They'd never been tight, even back at Manticore. But he was her brother, and their shared experiences alone were enough to make her forgive him, time and time again. He hadn't been the same since Lydecker took Jack. He and Jack had been as inseparable as she and Jondy.

"Keeping the squadron in line, huh, Maxie?" Tawny nodded towards Jondy, still holding the knife in one hand. Original Cindy hadn't relinquished her grip on the hockey stick yet either, even though she had one arm wrapped around Syl.

"Damn, boo. Your sisters get hotter and hotter, and none of y'all swing for the right team," Cindy complained with a grin. "Then they get all attached too."

Syl grinned back, letting go of Krit long enough to hug Cindy properly with both arms. "If the door ever swings that way, I'll give you a call," she said with a laugh. Max couldn't help studying the blond, noticing that Syl seemed to shine with some inner calm now. Maybe it was finally getting it together with Krit, after all their struggles of the past three years. Or maybe it was just that her sister was at peace with most things now.

"Looking good, little sister." Jondy dropped the knife, joining Cindy and Syl in a three-way hug. Max watched as Jondy peered closer at Syl. "Syl, are you-"

Syl shook her head, her face darkening slightly. "Of course not. You know we can't…" But there was a wistful look on her face.

Something about the thought of Syl pregnant made Max's stomach churn. She couldn't tell if it was envy, or breakfast. Pregnant. She'd seen what happened when two X-5s tried to procreate, back at Manticore. And from things Jondy said… Case had turned out fine, and Max was growing up as normal-looking as Case, but she still couldn't help being afraid. If she ever got pregnant… She wrapped her arms around her stomach protectively. A little person that would be both hers and Logan's--a potential pawn in any hostile situation, but proof of their love and everything they fought for… Her hormones must be surging again. Usually she was good about suppressing any maternal longings.

"Remind me to have a little talk with you, baby sister. There are some things you need to know…" And Jondy dragged Syl off into the corner.

"Aren't you going to introduce us, Maxie?" Tawny spoke up, breaking Max's daze. Her big brother's voice was oddly gentle.

"Tawny, this is Logan Cale and my roommate, Original Cindy. Original Cindy, Logan, my big brother Tawny."

She saw Logan give Tawny a half-smile. "You'll pardon me for not standing up," he said, holding out his hand.

Tawny's golden skin flushed slightly, as if he'd finally noticed the wheelchair sitting off to the side. He ran his free hand through his thick dark hair. "Understood. Good to finally meet you after hearing Krit rave from San Fran on up." Krit shot him a dirty look.

"If you've driven that far, you're welcome back at my apartment to clean up and rest for a while," Logan said, making a show of easing himself back into the wheelchair. "I think the girls'll be occupied here for a while."

To Max's surprise, Tawny actually laughed. "That'd be great. Maxie, if you don't mind sharing floor-space for a few days…"

"Syl can bunk here with me and Jondy if you guys wanna crash at Logan's. He's got a guestroom," Max offered, resting one hand on Logan's shoulder. His hand automatically came up to intertwine with hers.

"My room still available?" Krit asked with a grin. "We can bunk if you want, Tawn, since Zane snores like the bear he is."

Tawny laughed, his almond-shaped eyes crinkling at the corners, while Zane tried not to look hurt. It was true. Zane did have a bit of a bear's look about him with the way his shaggy brown hair fell into his eyes all the time. He wasn't big or clumsy, he was just very…deliberate. He knew one exact way of doing something, and that was the way he did it, even if it took him 48 hours for him to figure it out. But it was always the best way. Zane's nimble fingers had always been the best at picking locks and hacking into any security system. Even now, he could fix anything with parts. Teamed up with Syl's talent for explosives and electronics, they'd made a bad-ass team back at Manticore.

"Sharing a room with one, or twenty-four, it doesn't matter to me," Tawny answered in a flippant tone. "As long as I'm clean and dry, it's all good. Though a warm feminine body next to me doesn't hurt."

"Not in this lifetime, Tawny," Jondy shouted from the corner. Max couldn't help laughing.

"Need a lift?" Logan rummaged in his pocket for his keys absently. Max grabbed them off the counter, dangling them in front of his nose with a teasing grin.

"Got my bike. It's good. Thanks for the offer." Tawny pulled a pair of blue-tinted goggles out of his pocket. "2001 Suzuki Hayabusa 1300, in bright crimson." Logan looked like he was trying not to laugh. Max knew he'd never understand the love between an X-5 and a bike. Her baby meant the world to her.

"Name her?" Krit asked with a grin.

"Priss." And to Max's surprise, Tawny actually blushed.

"Is 'replicant' painted on the side?" Logan grinned too. "I can see why BGC could appeal to you."

Tawny's eyes immediately brightened. "It has to be 2040 though, dude. None of this Mackie lusting after Sylia crap. I like the cleaner lines of the later series."



"Nene's less annoying too, so that helps," Logan agreed. Max just exchanged a clueless look with Krit, though she was glad her brother at least found something in common with Logan.

"Hey, Maxie, lemme see your hand," Zane said suddenly. She was wondering if one of her brothers would notice. Her hand looked small in Zane's large one as he held her left hand up to the light. "Is that-"

She nodded. Zane's gray eyes had a wistful look in them as he leaned in, gently kissing her cheek. "Better luck to you, baby sister," he whispered. "I think you might get it right. Buddha will forgive you for kicking Manticore's ass."

"Hey, Maxie, you going with?" Krit nodded towards the door, where Logan and Tawny were still deep in discussion about something having to do with bubble gum.

She shook her head. "I'm gonna hang with my homegirls. Catch ya later, though. Take care of my boy."

A brief smile flashed over her little brother's face as he kissed her, just as Zane had. "If you watch my girl." He nodded his head towards her hand. "That looks really nice there, Maxie. I like the way you wear that. It completes you."



She twisted the ring around her finger, with what felt like a silly smile on her face. "Yeah. It does."

"Syl, we're heading to Logan's to shower. See you in a few?" Krit called across the room. Syl waved back, still in a heated discussion with Jondy. Krit shrugged. "I guess we'll see you later."

Logan seemed to realize he was halfway out the door before he wheeled back suddenly and turned towards her again. "We'll call in a few hours. I'll get the guys situated, and maybe we'll grab some more food, since the guest list just doubled." He gave her a playful grin. "You'll be okay?"



Max nodded, leaning down to kiss him. "Don't let my brothers give you too much grief. And if you tell them anything" she stressed that word, "then I'll let Cindy put that smackdown on your ass."

His hand caught at the back of her neck, fingers winding themselves in her hair. "If it's you doing the smackdown," he whispered, kissing his way up her throat, "I'll tell them anything you don't want me to."

She could feel the heat beginning to rise in her stomach. "And if you don't leave now, I'm gonna drag you into the bathroom and take another cold shower." She leered back at him. "Maybe later…"

"Mmm, later." Another kiss. "I'll hold you to later." And then with another grin, he turned back to the door.

The door shut on the four men, deep in conversation again. At least they were getting along. Tawny wasn't up to his usual fits and sulks yet, and Zane actually seemed social for once. Usually, her biggest brother only talked when he was in a philosophical mood. He wasn't the same joker he'd been before Samantha. But love changed all of them. Even Syl, once the most cynical of all, seemed more light-hearted than usual. She smiled with her eyes and her mouth now.

With a yawn, she made her way back to her sisters. Max settled on the couch, suddenly feeling like she'd been hit by ten tons of bricks. Damn, she was getting out of shape. She'd been eating more too--more than usual. But it was winter, and her body always seemed sluggish in winter. Maybe they all had a little bear DNA in them.

"You okay, boo?" The cushions on the couch dipped as Original Cindy sat next to her. Max's body automatically shifted so that she rested against her best friend's shoulder.

"Just tired. I guess all this holiday planning shit's wearing me out. Maybe it's cause I'm actually thinking with parts of my brain that never worked before. All that unused Martha Stewart DNA." She quirked a grin at Cindy, trying to make the worried look on her friend's face disappear.

Cindy's hand pushed Max's still wet hair back from her face. "You like a box of chocolates, girl. I never know what's goin' on inside you. Nuts, chews, you got it all."

"No partridge in a pear tree though. I don't think Manticore used any avian DNA." Max watched Jondy and Syl, not surprised that Jondy was waving her arms about now, like she did when she got overexcited. Zack had called her a firecracker, always ready to explode. Jondy looked more helpless than she was, so even Lydecker had tended to underestimate her.

"Your family takes things seriously, don't they, Boo?" Original Cindy waved her hand at Syl, who had Jondy pinned up against the wall.

"They're family," Max answered simply. That was all there was to it, all that needed to be said.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Nice digs," Tawny said, looking around with an appreciative grin. "Who'd you kill?"

"My uncle," Logan answered dryly, hanging his jacket on the lowest hook on the wall. "Bathroom's down the hall on the left. There's some shirts in the armoire if you need to borrow one." He turned his chair towards Krit and Zane. "If you guys don't mind waiting, there's a shower in my bathroom too."

Tawny nodded to his brothers. "You guys can go first. I'll chill with Logan." Logan noticed the almost wary look on Tawny's face, and wondered what he was in for. Zane seemed to tense for a moment, but Krit gave him a long look before the other man nodded.

"I'll take Logan's shower," Krit said, pulling Zane with him down the hallway. "Logan, if you only have Max's flowery shit shampoo in your shower again, I'm gonna kick your ass..."

Logan wheeled himself into the kitchen, pulling a bottle of beer out of the fridge. "Want one? It's Killian's." He pulled out a second, waving it at Tawny. The younger man stalked over, for all the world reminding him of another proud and snide X-5.

Tawny unscrewed the cap with his bare hand, making Logan wince. The X-5 took a sip, nodding slightly. "Not bad. I prefer the lighter brews. Too much head fills me up." A red flush spread over Tawny's sharply-planed face. "Too much yeast," he corrected with a little bit of a chuckle.

With another easy swing, Logan pulled himself up onto the counter. "Freudian slip. It happens," he said nonchalantly, sipping at the beer. "So, what's up?"

Though Tawny looked casual as he leaned against the wall, Logan's practiced eye still caught how tense the other man's body was. X-5s seemed to have a hair-trigger programmed into their genetic code. He'd seen Syl go off at the drop of a hat, and she was one of the slower of the siblings. Zane moved with the careful deliberation that came with his tall height. Tawny reminded Logan of one of the big cats--ready to strike at any moment, just biding his time.

"Why Max?" Obviously, Tawny was a graduate of the Zack School of Subtlety too. "She's not normal. Technically, only 75% of her DNA is human."

It was a familiar argument. Lydecker had tried the same approach. Maybe it ran in the family. Logan took another long sip of beer, letting the slightly bitter aftertaste roll around on his tongue for a while. "Doesn't matter. She's Max."

Tawny nodded slightly. "She'll have to leave you. You already lost your legs. What if you lose your life?"

That was still a sore point, even now. He knew Max still looked at him and felt guilty. But if he hadn't lost use of his legs, would she have ever come back? As much as he hated to say it, getting shot in the back brought them together. Their love grew out of a mutual need. And because of that, it was worth it. "I lost her once," Logan finally answered, remembering the dead weight of Max's body in his arms, her dark eyes lifeless. "Every day since then has been bonus time. And that'll always be worth any price." Just as his almost brother-in-law had said, three years ago... "Even after everything that's happened, I wouldn't give a minute of that time." He met Tawny's eyes, noticing that they even had the yellow-brown color of one of the big cats. " Not a second."

"And the ring you put on her finger? Is that for real?"

Though Max tried to play off how much it meant, Logan still caught her looking at it with a silly smile sometimes. He was still shocked that she'd said yes, as if something between them had a chance. He knew, deep down, that they were on borrowed time. And just the fact that she wore the ring was almost enough. Almost. He didn't let himself think about what it would be like to have her as his wife, what children they'd create together. The future was still a fantasy, but for now... "It's more real than anything I've ever done, and whether or not it works out, I'll always mean it."

Tawny looked at him for a long time, measuring Logan up with his unblinking gaze. It wasn't hard to see where he got his name: golden skin, golden eyes, even dark hair that was bleached to blond at the tips. Somehow, the inscrutable look sat better on Tawny's Asian features than it did on most of Max's other siblings. But Tawny wasn't Zack. And Tawny hadn't routinely insulted Logan's manhood and threatened to kick his ass.

"So why the third degree? I'm touched that Max means that much to you..." Tawny's scrutiny was beginning to unnerve Logan. "Besides, I think if I ever did hurt Max, she'd be the first in line to kick my ass."

The X-5 actually allowed himself to chuckle for a moment. "Maxie's never been my favorite sister," Tawny admitted with a slight shrug. "Zack could've picked someone a lot more worthy to die for. Everything was always for Max, even when we were kids. But she's my family. And the Colonel made her Zack's Second before we could even read. Family takes care of its own." He gave a long, shuddering sigh. "So while I don't get kicks out of this whole family togetherness shit, and while I hate the fact that there are six of us together in one town where Manticore and every other world military organization knew X-5s like to hang, it's for the folk who got me out of Manticore. And for them..."

"You're lucky." Tawny gave Logan a startled look. Logan just grinned slightly, loving any chance he had to shock one of Max's brothers or sisters. "Your family's been through hell and back, but you've always been there for each other. I can't say that about my relatives." He snorted. "Half of them refuse to acknowledge that we belong to the same gene pool."

"Sometimes I doubt the Manticore genepool spread too far," Krit's voice called out from halfway down the hallway, where he and Zane both stood in jeans and towel-turbans. "Budget cutbacks and all." In the past three years, Max's overly serious little brother had definitely lightened up. Logan still hoped that Krit's new-found sense of humor wasn't warped by months of hanging with Bling.

"Honey, we're home!" a voice called from the balcony as the sliding glass door slid open. Jondy grinned, coiling her trusty black rope around her waist. "What?" she said, an innocent look on her face. "We got a little bored."

A wolf-whistle echoed from behind Jondy. "Sexy men everywhere. Have I died and gone to the Good Place?" Syl teased, slipping in from behind Jondy.



Jondy shook her head. "Sorry, little sister, but I still think of three of these men as my brothers, and there are some places even I can't go." She blew a kiss to Tawny, a mocking look on her face. "No offense, big brother."

To Logan's surprise, Tawny laughed. "None taken, little sister."

"Max didn't come with you?" Logan tried not to look anxious.

An odd look washed over Jondy's face, but it was almost gone before Logan could read it. "She's asleep. Cindy's watching over her. She's got Maxie's back."

"Maxie sleeping?" Zane looked worried as he toweled off his long hair. "I know you two used to crash hard about every one night in ten when we were in the barracks, but..."

Jondy shrugged, tugging on her ear slightly. She made a movement with her hand that was too quick for Logan to catch. Damn the X-5s and their secrets. They were more open with him now then they first were after Max's disappearance, but there were still times when they blatantly reminded Logan that he wasn't one of them, no matter how much he loved their baby sister. But apparently Zane realized what Jondy meant, because he nodded.

"Whatcha got grub-wise, huh, Miracle Boy?" Jondy opened the fridge as if she owned it. "If you guys are hungry, Mr. Cale's a master chef."

"Omelets," Syl spoke up, now tucked under one of Krit's arms. Briefly, Logan wondered if he and Max looked like that, clinging so close together, as if they were almost afraid to be apart. "I've been craving a ham and cheese omelet since Portland."

If one thing stayed constant, it was an X-5's appetite. And for that one bit of normalcy, especially where Max's family was concerned, Logan would always be grateful.



~*~*~*~*~*~

December 31, 2023

"All set for tonight, Max?" Sketchy thumped down next to Max as she laced her shoes tighter. "Natalie's sending some food. She feels guilty for bailing at the last minute, but the restaurant wouldn't let her out of the shift."

"So you're back together again?" Max grinned, noting the dopey look on Sketchy's face. "'S all good. Some of my family's in town, so more food's always welcomed."

"Her family's eatin' us outta house and home," Original Cindy muttered, shoving her backpack into her locker and slamming it shut. "Sugar, if Original Cindy didn't sleep like the dead, you and your sisters would keep me up all night." Max tried to keep her face from falling, but Cindy must've noticed some change. "Not that I don't mind, Boo. I'm just glad it ain't your brother-men too. At least your sisters is hot, aiight?" Her best friend gave her a comforting grin. "Speakin' of sisters..."

Max saw Jondy making her way across the crowded floor, neatly dodging the bikes as they sped off on runs. "If you invite Normal to the party, do you think he'd let me work for a few weeks, Maxie?" Jondy rolled her blue eyes expressively, blowing her long brown hair out of her eyes. "I'm bored." Only her dancing eyes took away from her impression of an airhead. Jondy had always been good at impersonations and confusing the enemy.

"I don't believe we've met," Sketchy spoke up, exuding his usual misguided attempt at charm and grace. "Calvin, at your service."

"This is Sketchy. Sketchy, my sister..."

"Jenny." Jondy snorted as Sketchy actually kissed her hand. It looked like someone had been watching too much Camelot again. "So, whatcha think, Max? Who do I talk to about getting a gig?"

"You must really be bored, Boo, if you willin' to work for this hella- hella." Original Cindy pointed to Normal's cage in the corner. "Talk to the Bleater-Man in there. And if he bip bip bips at you, just tell him you'll put a smackdown on his little ass."

Max looked down at her sneakers, concentrating on filtering out the excess noise as Jondy walked up to Normal.

"Are you Reagan Ronald, sir?" Max almost winced at the sweetness that Jondy poured into her voice. But she'd learned from the best. Zack could've charmed anyone when he wanted to--when he felt like putting up the effort.

Looking up, she could see Normal giving Jondy a suspicious look. "It's the name they christened me. And if you know a guy named Sam, and you're asking for a job, the answer's no, missy."

Jondy actually managed to look confused. "The only Sam I know is my brother's old fiancé, sir, and last I heard, she was back in Los Angeles. My dad worked for The Living Express-y'know, the Pony Express re-enactment troupe-after he retired from the Post Office, and since I'm in town visiting my brother for a few weeks, I thought I might check here for work."

"Your sister's got moves, Max," Sketchy said, awe in his voice. Even in the crowded room, Jondy's light voice carried over the usual rush of noise. She'd always been good at yelling and making herself heard.

Max noticed Normal pointing at her, so she pretended to rummage through her bag, looking for something.

"That girl there--if you're friends with her, there's no way you're getting a job here. No way, no how. She corrupted my golden boy before he even completed his first run. Even managed to convince him to change his firetrucking name to Zack." Max could hear Normal thump a package against his desk. "There's only one reason why I don't fire that ingrate…"

"I just thought I'd ask for work, sir." Max could almost hear the tears in her sister's voice-either of forced sorrow, or explosive laughter. Which, she couldn't tell. "My father's best friend Theo used to work here, and--"

"Theo, huh?" Peeking up, Max noticed Normal's face blanch slightly, as if he still felt guilty about Theo's death, even after all these years. "I guess we can fit you in on a few runs-just for January though. And if you screw up once, I'll make sure you never work in the delivery industry again."

Jondy's face contorted for a moment before she calmed herself enough to squeak a thank you. Max found the urge to dig for something in her bag again, hiding her shuddering shoulders deep in her locker. Her sister would've made Zack proud. Her sister would've even made the Colonel proud…

"Max! Get your lazy butt over here!" With a sigh, she walked over to Normal, flashing a quick "good move" to Jondy.

"Yes, oh mighty one?" She gave him her usual half-bored, half-condescending look.

"This is--" Normal looked at Jondy quickly. He studied the ID she'd handed him. "This is Jenny Perez. Can you take her around and try not to screw her up?" There was an almost painful look on his face as he continued. "I'll pay you extra for the days you train her."

Max pretended to consider it, enjoying watching Normal squirm. "Fifty bucks a day."

Normal's face paled. "Five."

"Twenty. A girl needs to be able to eat, Normal. And you can't eat if you're dead." She gave him a pointed look. "I still have your friend the art collector's number. I think he's due outta jail in a few days…"



"Twenty bucks! Deal." Normal shoved an application and temporary Jam Pony ID into Jondy's hands. "You can take a locker over there. We're not responsible if anyone steals your stuff. Grab a bike from the rack. You break it, you buy it. And I'm making Max personally responsible for you, so if you firetruck up, she'll kick your butt." He swallowed, looking as if he were trying to forget something. "Believe me."

Max smiled sweetly as she held out a hand to her sister. "Max Guevara. Those are my peeps, Sketchy and Original Cindy."

Jondy grinned. "Jenny Perez. You worked with Uncle Theo, didn't you? He kept talking about this Max person that-" As soon as they were out of earshot from Normal, Jondy's carefully-schooled mask cracked. "He can't be serious, Maxie," she wheezed between fits of laughter. "He can't be. Any guy that tense should've had a coronary ten years ago."

Max threw one of her spare vests at her sister. "He's not so bad, once you learn to ignore him." Jamming her baseball cap over her eyes, she grabbed her bike from where it leaned against her locker. "C'mon, Jenny, I'll show you where the extra bikes are kept."

Sketchy followed behind them like a puppy. "How do you make shit up like that? And can you teach me?" There was a look of awe on his face. "Hey, does that mean that you kick ass like Max too? Cause there are these guys that I know who-"

Max turned back to Sketchy, resisting the urge to pull his black beanie over his chin to shut him up. "Hey, Sketchy, remember the last time, with those Russian dudes?"

He nodded, swallowing.

"That's what happens to guys who can't keep their mouths shut. Aiight?"

Sketchy nodded again. "So, ummm, I'll see you tonight at like 8?"

Jondy laughed again as he hightailed it back to his locker. "Whipped, Max. That boy is so whipped. No wonder I can't find myself a man. None of 'em fight back."

Original Cindy grinned, rolling a bike towards Jondy. "That's when you start playin' for the all-girl team, boo. And when you do, look me up, aiight?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was almost five when they got home after work. Max was surprised that Jondy'd actually enjoyed the day, riding around the city. Normal was impressed that the runs had gotten done at all, much less finished in less time than Max normally took. Not that she slacked off at work or anything, but it seemed more fun with her sister there. It was almost like they'd never missed out on those ten years that Manticore took away, as if they had escaped together that night…

"Normal invited you back, sugar. That's enough to impress Original Cindy," Cindy said as the three rolled their bikes down the hallway. "And Matt already asked for your number. Last time someone got that much attention was when we got Mr. Pretty Boy Alec. Don't ask Original Cindy about all the fights he caused."

Jondy snorted, pulling out a pocketful of papers. "And Jimmy, and Ty, and Jared. And that little blond, Beth…"

"She swings that way? Original Cindy gotta have a long talk with that girl." With a practiced kick right below the doorknob, Original Cindy pushed the door open. "Hey, boo, we got company," she called from the apartment.

Max was the last one to roll her bike through, so she was surprised when she saw the five men in her small kitchen, busy at work. Syl was lying on the couch, reading a book. Her brothers must've been bored during the day, because the apartment was cleaner than she'd ever seen it. Even the two motorcycles in the corner sparkled, as if someone had polished her and Jondy's babies.

Logan stood with his back to them, frantically stirring something over the burners on the stove. Max's stomach growled as she smelled all the different foods crowded into one small area. She could hear Jondy's stomach rumbling in response, and laughed. With her enhanced sense of smell, she could almost pick out every ingredient of the marinade that Logan was dipping the meat into. And people wondered why eating was an extremely sensual act for an X-5…

She leaned her bike against Jondy and Original Cindy's and snuck up behind Logan. "Smells good," she whispered, nibbling on his neck. "Tastes good too." She could feel the heat of his blood warming his skin as he turned his face to kiss her.

"Uncle Jonas' special recipe." Logan's voice was husky, his glasses slightly fogged as he turned back to the meat he was grilling on the portable grill he'd brought. "If I tell you what's in it, I'll have to kill you." The edges of his mouth twitched, even though his voice was deadpan.

"How bout later?" Max asked, running one hand down his spine. Grabbing his ass had a less than satisfactory response, since he couldn't feel it, so she settled for tracing patterns against his back to make him squirm.

Logan wriggled away slightly from her touch, his face grimacing. She loved the fact that he was still ticklish in some spots. The fact that he could feel nothing below the waist still caused problems on occasion, but they got creative. And creativity was all good… "Later would work for me. Lemme check my calendar," he said with that sexy little grin of his. He leaned closer, kissing her again. "Maybe tonight, we can head back to my place, and-"

"Do you two have to do that here?" Original Cindy's voice broke the mood. "That's what those things called bedrooms is for, aiight? Just cuz some of you getting' some don't mean we all need to know about it."

Max and Logan broke away. She could feel her face heating up, even though there was really nothing to be embarrassed about. Her family knew what it was like to have that constant animal hunger for sex. For weeks after her heat, she still felt the traces of it sometimes. And from the way her brothers always seemed to act around her during that time of the year, she knew it affected them almost as headily as it affected her.

"Hey, Cindy, if you're free later, we can always go scouting for chicks. There were some hotties at that bar you took us to last night." Tawny grinned as he cut up little wedges of cheese and lunch meat. Even though the Cale Trust was long sucked dry, it looked like Eyes Only still had a few connections. Either that, or Tawny'd been sleeping for food again. Alec did that sometimes, when he wasn't charming people out of shit. But you did what you had to do to eat. Trade, barter, sex…

Original Cindy opened the fridge, pulling out a bottle of what looked like orange juice. "If this is fresh-squeezed, I'm gonna make my mama proud and kiss one of you boys." Max watched her roommate open the bottle and take a careful sip. A look of rapture washed over Cindy's face. "Damn, boo, if I weren't a lesbian…"

Jondy moved to the cabinet, taking out every glass in there. "Share the wealth, my sister. I think I'm getting scurvy from all the lack of C. You people need some sunshine here."

Max took the glass that she was handed, trying to ignore the look that passed between her sister and her roommate. Logan just looked puzzled, so at least she knew he wasn't in on whatever head trip Cindy and Jondy were surfing. Whatever. Orange juice. She could remember the first time she'd seen orange juice, and how startled she'd been that beverages came in colors other than white milk, clear water, and black coffee. If she could taste sunshine, she was sure it would be just like orange juice. If freedom hadn't been enough, orange juice would have won her over from Manticore forever.

"So the cheese is cut," Logan paused, letting her brothers finish snickering, "the meat's almost done, and Bling made the salads earlier, since apparently none of us are artistic enough. There's more beer and wine at my place in the cooler, and the girls won't tell us where the cookies are stashed, so we're set, right?"

"Sketchy said Natalie was sending food, and I think Herbal's woman's bringing some grub too," Max offered, settling back against Logan's chest again. "Joshua made macaroni and cheese." Joshua had a little more freedom now. Max knew that keeping him cooped up in Father's house wasn't much better than the caged life he'd lived at Manticore. He was careful on the few occasions he went out, and always made sure to wear his hood. This New Years, Big Fella actually had a date with Rita, the curator at the museum. It was a slow friendship that had grown up between the two. Max was happy for her friend. He deserved something good in his life. And his art career was really starting to build.

"Now we just gotta clean you girls up." Cindy stood, her arms crossed over her chest. "I hate to say it, boo, but your family does not know how to dress. 'Cept maybe for this one here." She and Tawny grinned at each other. "Wheels' got his own sense of white boy style, but you…" Cindy began shoving the guys towards the door. "You go and get pretty while I work on Sleeping Beauties here. No sistah-girl of mine's entertaining lookin' like that."

Max looked down at her Capri pants and quilted vest. "What's wrong with the way I'm dressed? I can shower. And my undies are clean. It's all good."

Original Cindy choked. "That, girlfriend, is why it's not all good."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Is this what it's like to have sisters?" Syl sat on the floor in front of Jondy, letting her sister play with her long hair. Jondy's quick fingers wove ribbons in and out of the blond hair.

"You have sisters," Jondy said, chewing on her lip. "Light blue or dark blue, Syl?"

Her little sister tilted the hand mirror up, trying to see the wreath that Jondy'd woven in to her braid. "Light blue. You already used dark blue." Syl's dark eyes met Jondy's in the mirror. "I didn't mean it like that, Jondy. I meant it like normal sisters. The way people grew up Outside."

Even more than ten years later, it was still Outside. Almost fourteen years since the escape, and they still thought of themselves as set apart from everyone else. It was just one more reminder that they'd never be normal.

"I have two sisters, sugar." Cindy looked up from where she sat on Max's motorcycle, painting her toenails. Max was in the shower, otherwise Jondy was sure that her baby sister would be throwing a fit right now. "It ain't all it cracked up to be, aiight? Big sister bossin' Original Cindy around, baby sister whinin' about how Mama don't love her, Daddy always complainin' why can't you be like Keisha and Rainie…" She rolled her eyes. "Trust the word, boo. You ain't missin' a thing."

Jondy finished off her sister's braid, surprised at how good it looked. Usually, it didn't look right. She didn't know if it was because she was still backwards, even after being years out of Manticore, or if there was just something defective in her genes. "We missed out on childhood though. That might've been a nice thing to go through…"

She looked down for a moment, staring at her hands as they still clutched a handful of brightly colored ribbons. She tried to imagine what it would've been like, growing up with a mother and father and Max and Syl and the rest, all crowded into one house. No one had braided anyone else's hair at Manticore. She hadn't known what a ribbon was until the escape. Even underwear had mystified her at first, since boys and girls alike had worn the same military regulation shorts.

Cindy didn't say anything for a while. "You turned out aiight, sugar. Yeah, you revved-up females sometimes call in black helicopter boys, and seems like someone always doggin' your tail, but you aiight. You're tight with your sisters, and you ain't some whack killing machine. And my boo love you almost more'n that Miracle Boy of hers. And if y'all willin' to trust your life with Original Cindy, you aiight with her too." She stood, walking carefully towards Jondy. Jondy could feel one of Original Cindy's hands running through her hair. "If you put a little glitter in here, and wear that little blue shirt Max has stashed in her closet with those leather pants, you'd pass for more than hot, sugar."

Maybe she lacked a little growing up. But that was the past, and there was no use changing that. She had sisters now, sisters who would always be there, no matter how far she had to run.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

8 PM. There was a knock at the door. Max knew this was nothing compared to live ordnance drills, but her stomach was still in a fit of panic. Jondy had that deer in the headlights look on her face again, one Max hadn't seen since the escape. It was friends at the door, just friends who-

"Max? You in there?" Kendra's voice echoed form the other side of the door. "If I come in and people are naked, I'm gonna be really mad…"

"Open it, Maxie." Jondy shoved her towards the door. "It's just a party. It's not like we're on an E and E mission or anything."

Max looked to Logan helplessly. He shrugged from where he stood, rearranging the skewered meat on its tray. "It's your party, Max. You have to answer the door. We can't do it for you."

It was just a door. She wasn't scared of some dumbass door. These were her friends…

"Happy New Years, Max!" She found herself in the middle of Kendra's arms. Looking over her shoulder, she could see Kendra's latest squeeze of the month, Eric. Her old roommate had worn out Mr. Multiples after about a year and a half. Apparently even great sex didn't last. At least this new one was nothing like the last Eric, the one she'd picked up at Crash in heat…

"Happy New Year, Kendra." There was a hat perched on her former roommate's head. Max still wasn't sure what dopey hats had to do with New Years, but maybe she'd figure it out eventually. It was probably like the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree thing, or all the Star Wars references that Logan liked to make. Something about a force being with them…

"Max, you remember Eric. Eric, my old roommate, Max." Eric was pretty hot- dark brown eyes, long black hair. He kind of had the old Goth thing going, even though Goth had apparently been out of date for years-whatever it had been.

Eric grinned, and Max could see why Kendra liked this one so much. "Thanks for inviting us."

As they walked in, Logan walked over, slipping an arm around her waist. "See, that wasn't hard," he teased, kissing her by her ear.

Eventually, others arrived. Sketchy showed up with the promised food in hand, and he actually managed not to drop any of it. A few others from work showed up, and Ty and Brian kept hovering around Jondy like she was the next best thing to God. Even Herbal came, showing off his woman, Harmony, and their two year old daughter, Dylan. Dylan spent most of the evening asleep on Syl's shoulder, and Max caught an oddly wistful look on both her sisters' faces.

"Grub's great, Max." Sketchy held up a chicken wing from where he stood deep in conversation with Tawny. Krit swore the sauce was from some place called Buffalo that had supposedly invented the chicken wing. He'd presented the bottle to her like it was gold, reverently invoking the name of the Anchor Bar. Logan knew it, so it had to exist, even if Max did doubt its godlike qualities…

"See, it's not so bad, is it?" Logan said from behind her. "Throwing a party doesn't have to be like Bennett and Marianne's wedding. These are people who love you. They just came to be with you, not to be impressed."

Max leaned up against him, looking around at the twenty people crowded into her tiny apartment. Cindy'd even found someone, a friend of Kendra's named Star. The two spent most of the night sitting close on the couch, never taking their eyes off each other.

"I'm just not used to all these people being together--people who aren't my family. People who love me."

Logan's arms came around her, and she could feel his chin resting on her shoulder. "There are a lot more people that love you than you think, Max. And your family's a lot bigger. You aren't some barcode to us. You're our Max, and because of that, we all love you." His breath tickled the back of her neck. "Especially me."

Jondy and Krit slowly made their way across the crowded room. "You have a lot of nice friends, Maxie." Her sister smiled wistfully. "I can kinda see why you never wanted to leave before."

Krit gave Jondy a quick hug. "It'll be over someday, Jondy. We'll be able to stop running. We might not get that happily ever after that you and Maxie and Tinga always talked about, but we'll get something out of all this shit."

But in her sister's eyes, Max could see clouds of doubt. For Jondy, there was no happily ever after. To Jondy's knowledge, her prince died years before, and with him, all chances for a normal life. But Jondy never seemed to regret. She only hoped she could be that strong, if she had to leave someday. Max twisted the ring around her finger again. When she had to leave…

"Max, I'm gonna cut out. It's almost midnight, and Natalie wanted me to stop by the restaurant." Sketchy had his usual dopey grin on his face. "This time, I'm gonna do right by her and try to make it work. I promise. You can kick my ass if I don't."

Max couldn't help chuckling. "You know I will, Sketch. One false move, and I'll have your ass. Got it?"

He nodded seriously. "And I meant to say…" He nodded towards her hand. "I didn't notice it at work today, cause you had your gloves on, but I wish you both happiness. And if you don't invite me to the wedding, I'll be seriously hurt." Sketchy grinned. Then, to Max's surprise, he leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek. "Best of luck, Max."

Hesitating for a moment, Max reached out and hugged him hard. "You too, Sketch." She tugged the collar of his shirt briefly, reminding him of exactly well she could kick his ass. "Just remember…"

Sketchy flashed a grin at her. "I don't think Natalie'll let me forget this time. Late."

"It is time for I and I to go as well," Herbal's slow drawl broke in. Dylan was asleep on his shoulder, one small hand in her mouth. "My baby sleeps, so we must get her home before we can't get her to sleep again."

Max reached out, carefully hugging one of her oldest friends. "Happy New Year, Herbal. Your family's beautiful."

Herbal's hand reached out, cupping her cheek. There was a soft smile on his face as he reached out with his other to Harmony. "Congratulations, Max. Ja says that yours will be as well." He nodded to Logan. "You are a lucky man, my brother."

"I know," Logan answered. "Believe me, I know."

As if on cue, the others began to trickle out, claiming engagements elsewhere. Max wasn't sure if this was the way it was supposed to go, but she was cool with it. As much as she loved her friends, the apartment was beginning to seem a little crowded. And Cindy was starting to get that look on her face that said she'd probably have company tonight…

"Half an hour til midnight. Wanna move this party to my place?" Logan nodded towards the couch, where Cindy and Star sat, still talking intently. Max looked at her siblings, who nodded. One was noticeably absent though.

"Tawny slipped out about an hour ago with the red head," Syl offered, noticing that their brother was missing. "He said he'd come back tomorrow morning."

Jondy snorted. "Hopefully he'll be wearing his own underwear this time."

Max shot her sister a curious look, but figured it wasn't worth asking. There were some things she didn't need to know about her brother and his sex life.

"Six of us, two motorcycles. I doubt Tawny left his bike here, so I guess we'll have to borrow your bike, Maxie." There was a hopeful look on Krit's face.

"Or you could borrow Logan's car." Max automatically shot her brother a dirty look for daring to even think of such a thing. "No one takes my baby. No one." She looked at Logan over her shoulder. "Wanna go for a ride?" She needed the feeling of fresh air on her face. Even now, she still felt a little claustrophobic, even though no one at the party hadn't been someone she trusted and called a friend.

"Looks like you're with me, Zane." Jondy pulled on her jacket, tossing her spare goggles to Zane. "Wanna race, Maxie?" Her blue eyes danced.

"It's no contest," Max answered with her own crooked grin. "I'll kick your ass so far that you'll wind up back in Gillette."

Jondy laughed. "We'll see about that, baby sister." She began to wheel her bike towards the door.

"Headin' out, boo?" Original Cindy called from the couch. Her eyes looked bright in the flickering candlelight.

Max walked over, grabbing her keys off the kitchen counter. "We're gonna crash at Logan's tonight, since six more bodies would get a little crowded in here." She leaned over, giving Cindy a hard hug. "Happy New Year, boo."

Cindy returned the hug, a slight smile on her face. "You too, Max. New Years mean new starts. Maybe this'll be your turn, boo." She looked back at Star, her smile deepening. "Maybe it'll be my turn again too."

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Dammit!" Max gunned the accelerator as they rode through the silent streets of Seattle. Logan's arms tightened around her waist automatically. "She can't beat me. This is my turf. There's no way she caught the shortcut."

She caught a flash of Jondy's black motorcycle as they rounded the corner into the Financial District. From the pained look on Zane's face, Max could tell that her big brother wasn't enjoying the ride as much as Jondy was. Jondy had a look of pure ecstasy on her face.

"I thought Jondy was your favorite sister," Logan shouted over the wind.

"She is," Max called back. "But that still doesn't mean she can beat me on her bike."

She grumbled as they pulled into the garage under Fogel Towers. Jondy sat on her bike, grinning like a cat, while Zane fell to his knees, kissing the ground in relief.

"You weren't supposed to know about that back alley near the Big Rhino," Max grumbled as she parked her bike next to Jondy's. Jondy just looked at Logan, who found something more interesting to look at over near his neighbor's Jaguar. Before she could say anything else, the Aztek rumbled into the space next to their bikes.

Syl jumped out. "So?" she asked. Max only glared at Jondy. "You owe me 20, Krit."

"Maxie, how could you let me down?" Krit whined as he hopped out the other side, tossing the keys to Logan. "And don't blame me for Jondy knowing about the alley behind the Big Rhino. I didn't tell her." Her brother paled as she began to stalk towards him. "I swear, it was Syl. I swear, Maxie! Syl, back me up!"

Her sister just laughed. "What were you saying, Krit?" Max couldn't help laughing as Syl backed away to stand next to Jondy.

"Peace, boys and girls. I don't feel like separating you, so why don't we just take this all upstairs?" Zane interjected in a mild tone. There was a pained look on his face.

"Buddha's no fun if he doesn't approve of fighting, big brother," Jondy remarked with a grin as they moved towards the elevator. "I don't think I like this new religion of yours."

"It's not about religion, Jondy," Zane explained patiently. "It's finding inner peace and keeping the balance within your life." He shrugged. "It doesn't rewrite the past, but it helps me live with it a little bit."

"Like Lex." Jondy hooked her arm through Zane's as they reached the elevator. "Father Alexander," she corrected herself. "I just never saw a lot of good in faith."

Max looked at Logan, wondering if it was faith that kept him going in those long months while she was at Manticore. She didn't know if she could call what she had faith. Life hadn't exactly given her reason to believe in a greater good, but sometimes… Sometimes, even the eternal cynic inside her couldn't help but wonder.

They were silent as they walked down the hallway to Logan's door. Max could hear the muffled sounds of parties coming from the floor above and below. The apartment was silent, so Bling had probably disappeared with whatever lady friend he had a date tonight. Logan walked to the kitchen, fumbling around in the wine rack. Krit and Syl slumped down on the couch, Jondy rummaging for glasses in the cabinet above the stove. When Logan finally found the bottle he wanted, he uncorked it, pouring out six equal shares into what was left of his mother's wedding crystal.

Max took her glass, sipping the white Zinfandel slowly. It was a lighter wine, not the heavy red that Logan usually favored. "This is the last bottle from my parents' wedding, back in '85," Logan said, coming to stand beside her. "My mother said to open it at a special occasion. And I can't think of anything more special than family."

The silence grew heavy in the apartment, the light-heartedness of the earlier party forgotten. Max crossed one arm over her stomach, feeling an oppressive weight building there, like something was coming-something big. She moved to the window, looking out the same way Logan did when he brooded. She sat on the arm of her chair, trying to pick something- anything-out from the lights of Seattle below, as if she could read her fortune there.

"Do you feel it, Maxie?" Syl came to stand at her elbow, arms wrapped around herself.

Jondy appeared on Max's other side. "Something's building. A storm or something. I can feel it, but…" She trailed off, her blue eyes trying to find something in the darkness below.

Max looked at her sisters, their faces echoing the same sense of foreboding that she'd felt the night they attacked Manticore, and the morning of the first escape, when she was nine years old. Something was coming. Soon.

Syl shivered, though Max knew it wasn't from the cold. From behind her, she could feel the warmth of Logan's body as she leaned back against him. Krit stood beside Syl, Zane next to Jondy. Even shoulder to shoulder with her family, Max still couldn't shake the feeling that this something was bigger than she could handle--bigger than all of them together could handle.

The clock in the hall sounded twelve times, announcing the arrival of the New Year. It startled Max, the same way loud noises had once shocked her in the barracks on this same night, decades before.

"Like that night when we were small-before the barracks, but after we got shoes-and all the horns went off…" Syl chuckled, as she jumped at the same moment Max did.

"And we all ran so fast… We thought it was a siren or something, and even Zack fled with us." Zane said. He lifted up his glass of wine, his voice thick with emotion. "For Zack. Godspeed, big brother, and put in a good word for us in the Good Place."

"For Tinga," Syl added. "And Brin, and Eva, and Jack. All the ones who didn't make it out alive."

"For Case and Max, two kids who are in for a lot more than they bargained for." Krit raised his glass. "Someone watch over them, so they don't pay for the same things we did."

"For Ben, telling stories and making room for us with Zack," Max whispered, trying not to remember the last look she'd seen on her laughing brother's face before she took his life.

"For Hope," Jondy said finally, the tears on her face reflecting the lights of the city below. Somehow, Max didn't think her sister meant the emotion though.

"And for a boy named Ender," Zane finished. "And a man who'll probably never know how right he was about kids playing soldier."

"Cheers," her family echoed. Max drained the wine glass.

"Happy New Year, X-5s." Logan leaned over, kissing both Jondy and Syl in turn. Krit and Zane each placed gentle kisses on her forehead, and Max soon found herself in another three-way hug with her two sisters-her only sisters remaining, from the original escape.

"Happy New Year," Max whispered to the window and whatever darkness was building there. "We'll find you, and we'll beat your ass. You can't bring us down, no matter how hard you try."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jondy watched as Krit and Syl and Max and Logan each kissed, and then began to move towards their respective rooms. Zane had already fled for the night, claiming the last guestroom as his in Tawny's absence. For a while, Jondy prowled around the empty apartment. The Manticore part of her was tempted to hack into Logan's computer just for the challenge, but that part was getting its ass kicked by Jondy who had been out in the world for far too long. Maybe this would be the year they could stop running. Maybe this would be the year that it all changed. Bring it on, 2024…

Without realizing it, she found herself at Zane's door. She didn't need hyper-sensitive hearing to know what was going on in the other two bedrooms. Logan and Max had never been subtle about their hornier than usual sex life, and Jondy'd been through a relationship with an X-5, so she knew how heady it was for Krit and Syl. It wasn't all about sex, but a good part of it was grounded in emotional and primal urges--mostly primal. But it wasn't primal urges that drew her to Zane's door. It was too many nights spent alone.

"C'mon in," a voice called from inside. Jondy opened the door, not too surprised to find Zane still up, laying on top of the covers, as if he were waiting for her. He'd stripped down to his boxers, and she could feel the heat beginning to rise in her stomach. Zane was her brother, but he was also human and an X-5, and though he technically should have taken over for Zack, he'd stepped aside without even asking after Max broke out of Manticore. He'd never had the drive to protect the way it had been drilled into Max and Zack. And even now, he looked out for them as he could. He didn't offer comfort. But he didn't deny it either.

"Can I--" Jondy trailed off, shutting the door behind her. "I can't…not tonight. I need--"

Zane pulled back the covers from the bed, patting the place beside him. "I know, baby sister. I know."

With a sigh, Jondy let herself sink onto the bed. She carefully stripped down to her underwear, gratefully taking the t-shirt that Zane held out for her. Without a word, she crawled under the covers, letting herself curl up against Zane's warm body.

His arm wrapped around her, drawing her closer. "If you need…" This time he trailed off, not knowing the words to say. But they didn't need words. Not now, not for this. Zane rolled over, his large hand reaching out to trace her face in the darkness. "It's okay, Jondy. I know."

And he did know, because he'd let her come to him the same way, that first time they'd met again after Zack died. There had never been many men in her life, and she knew that there was something twisted about the fact that she sought comfort in the arms of a man she'd called brother. But she wasn't like other people. None of them were. And there were times when Outside rules didn't apply. Krit and Syl were proof of that.

"Her name would've been Hope," she whispered, letting the tears fall onto Zane's waiting hand. "Or Ender…"

She felt his lips brush against her cheeks and lips, kissing away the tears. "There'll still be Hope," she heard him whisper as he rolled on top of her. "She might not be yours, but there will be Hope for us." In any other life, Zane, like Ben, would have been a prophet, or even a man with his own show on one of the religious networks. But somehow, Jondy felt that her brother might be right this time. Dark times were ahead, but something would carry them through. They would handle it together. They could be strong.

And until it arrived, all they could do was run towards it, just as they had been since the escape.