Disclaimer: No I don't own the characters, heck I don't even own this
story. I am putting this up for somebody else who wanted me too but review
anyways because she will be reading them. But I did help her a bit with
editing. (
Time frame: Right after Hello Goodbye (one of the saddest most depressing eppies of all time)
A/N There are about 4 more chapters so review and request and I will post the rest.
It had been week and a half since she told him. Since she lied to him. She thought it was best for him. She walked around everyday telling herself she was saving him and keeping him safe. But it hurt like hell. Every day the little voice was screaming to her louder with each passing day that she shouldn't have lied and she should at least go check on him He doesn't have to know about it, but everyday she beat the voice back. She went into a daily routine of Jam pony Crash and Joshua's. Nothing was changing and she honestly thought it was for the best. Amazed how Alec was right and that regular people and them didn't mesh and they were just a danger. She played the game well. She dulled the pain when she was with people but Cindy worried about her and so did Joshua.
Alec hated to see her in such a way even but he kept thinking it was the right thing to do for all of them. Joshua wouldn't see Annie and Max wouldn't see Logan and his slightly romantic thoughts of Asha were overcoming him but he wouldn't do it to her either. It was painful but it was for the best.
Max was over at a table with Cindy talking about life and other pointless topics as Alec went to the bar to order another pitcher of beer for them. As he waited he looked down the bar and saw Asha standing there talking to someone he never saw before. The man handed her a bunch of papers and her emotions were coming off determined. 'God she's beautiful. No wait dammit Alec you won't let her affect you. Nothing happened, nothing will.' Alec sighed and when the man left Asha suddenly noticed he was a few bar stools over. She glared at him with a hatred he had never seen. Asha sat down and went back to looking at the files handed to her. Alec watched her with interest. She wasn't interested that much when he let her down so what was that all about. Suddenly her face scrunched up at the files and looked like she was going to cry and throw up at the same time. Alec moved towards her.
"What are you looking at?" Her head snapped up and she quickly closed the file before he could glance at it.
"Sorry to break up your own little party but I thought maybe you have something on your mind." 'Dammit Alec what the hell are you doing you need to back off. But if she needs help I suppose it wouldn't kill anyone.' She glared at him.
"Fuck you."
"Why thank you. What is your problem?"
"My problem?" she looked surprised and angry with him. "My problem is your sister over there."
"What did she do to you?" she gave out a cry like laugh as if to indicate what hasn't she done.
"She killed him." Alec knew whom she was talking about but he didn't know what she meant. He may go into depression but Logan was a fighter and he would get over her one day and it was for his own good.
"Who do you mean?"
"Dammit Alec you know very well who the hell I am talking about. Max killed Logan. And it wouldn't surprise me a bit if you were the one who told her to do it."
"She did the right thing. She is a danger to him."
"He can't live without her you know that."
"He can't live with her."
"They would've found a cure. Eventually no matter how long it would have taken he would've found it."
"Yeah but before she accidentally killed him or got him killed by white or Manticore?" She looked him straight in the eye.
"Alec your wrong. I know your wrap. Normal people are in danger around your type blah, blah, blah, but hadn't you ever thought Logan was putting her in just as much danger? That by being an eyes only contact and a do gooder he put her in danger as well? Or that matter you. We aren't normal people. Logan, Max's friends or even me."
"Oh yeah and now your going to tell me how he is throwing himself into his work because of the break up. But that is what he does. He fights and throws himself into work when times get rough and one day it'll pass." She let out a small laugh that clearly said you have no idea.
"No. That isn't how he is taking it. I wouldn't be worried if that were the case." Alec was perplexed.
"Then how is he taking it? "
"The day after he saw her in the apartment something snapped in him. He doesn't eat. I had to actually make him eat in front of me because he kept insisting he didn't need it. He hasn't touched his work since then. The computer has never stayed this cold so long. He dulls the pain with a drinking habit he picked up and I bet he picked up a few tips from his ex- wife on how to dull the pain in that sense. He isn't living anymore. He is a shell that won't tell. He doesn't care about what happens to himself anymore. He disappears way to often and even I can't even track him. The worst thing is he is fighting any more as you put it. He doesn't give a damn about his life style and he isn't fighting to get her back. We both know he would be trying to tell her everything will eventually turn out ok and he would try his damndest. She said something that night that made him step into the shadows and he is slipping away."
"Look, if he knew that this was for his own good then he might not be so hard. Have you tried to tell him where she is coming from? Cause if it gets to out of hand I will spell it out for him." She made a noise that sounded like another laugh but it cracked.
"You won't get the chance."
"What do you mean?" She looked down and tried to stop the stinging in the back of her head and eyes.
"He was nabbed last night." She looked back up at him and his face was filled with lines of concern and disbelief. She went on.
"He was coming across the room to talk to me because of a dire situation requiring help from eyes only and he was there to discuss it so he could refer the problem to someone else. We were at that bar in sector 4. Suddenly there were 3 guys who came up to him and he they said something to him and I can only guess they had guns. He didn't even blink. He could've easily taken them out with his gun and fist with training he picked up from people he meets in his business, but he didn't even try. I think he was waiting for it. He calmly walked out with them and I saw a van drive up and they hit him with the butt of their gun and tossed him in the car. He didn't even flinch." Alec couldn't believe he was hearing this. This was Logan who was all about the fight. He didn't give up like that. But now he was wondering about Asha.
"Why didn't you do something?" Asha looked down again as the tears threatened to fall.
"He looked at me when they approached him and he gave me instructions for a scenario for this once and that I was not to interfere and follow them. Although I am sure he really didn't want me to follow them. I got the license plate number and I managed to get the messages meant for eyes only about Logan." She gestured towards the file she was looking at previously. She closed her eyes as if not wanting to remember something. Alec looked at her and then reached down to the file. He opened it and the first thing on top was a picture of Logan. His eye twitched as he saw it.
Logan was so beaten up and bruised he could barely tell it was him. His face was swelled up and purple, he had a bloody nose there were clean cuts most likely made with a knife over various parts of the body for the worst reaction without actually killing him. It almost looked like there was a bullet hole wound in his right shoulder. His head was hanging down but his expression could be seen. No signs of crying or hatred or of any emotion. Like Asha said his eyes reflected the hollowness he was feeling. Asha regained her composure.
"He can't feel it." Alec looked up at her with his brows furrowed.
"The cuts I mean. He can't feel any of that. He doesn't give a damn about what is happening and what is going to happen. But unlike him or other people I do give a damn and I am going to get him back." Her expression turned pained.
"What?"
"Well the thing is I don't think even if I can bring him back he won't let it happen or he might even try it himself. I can't save his soul this time. Max can only do that." She looked him straight in the eye with an intense look of sadness and determination.
"You and your damn distance."
"Asha don't start."
"No I will. I am not gonna bite Alec. I'm not in any more danger if I get involved with you. I am with the S1W for god's sake! You think you left Manticore? You think Max left Manticore? Hell no!! They have just as much control on you as they did when you were in there! Your emotions never changed and their lessons will always be with you so you might as well be back in there. Unless you let all that shit go then you are no better than the soldier they wanted." Alec's face was unreadable.
"Which you are not." She added.
Alec looked at the picture of Logan again. Then he came up squarely with her.
"I am going to help." She looked at him in wonder. She nodded took the file from him and left the club. Alec took a swig of beer from the pitcher he ordered. He picked it up and took it to Max and Cindy. Max looked up at him with a puzzled look on her face.
"Why were you talking to Asha?" Alec sighed. He didn't want ask her because he didn't know what would happen but he needed to know.
"What did you exactly tell Logan when you broke up with him?" She cast her eyes down.
"That it was over and I can't endanger him."
"Max stop lying." She snapped her head up towards him.
"Come on Max what the hell did you tell him? I need to know." She closed her eyes.
"That day after I got you out of jail and you left my apartment Logan saw us and when I saw him again he thought there was something there. He was drunk and confronted me but I didn't deny it. I told him we were together now and that it was over."
Alec couldn't believe it. She lied to him like that? She said THAT? Good god, no wonder why Logan was giving up. Cindy looked over at her surprised as well. She spoke first.
"You told him THAT? Damn Max that was hitting below the belt." Barely above a whisper she responded.
"I had to." Alec ran his hands through his hair and his breathing was increasing. 'Oh man I can't believe she did that to him. She really did kill him. It is all my fault. Fuck!! Oh damn what the hell are we gonna do now. Oh when Asha hears this she isn't going to believe it.'
Max noticed his frantic stance and the panic passing through his eyes.
"What?" He sighed looked at her and sat down on the chair next to her.
"Max," he went slowly, "Logan was kidnapped yesterday." Her eyes didn't believe it.
"That can't of happened." She retorted. Cindy whistled a slow whistle.
"Damn. Let me guess, the blonde over there is going to get him back." OC said. Alec nodded. Knowing that Logan could let it all go. If he wasn't fighting what they were doing to him then he was a goner. More to himself than anyone under his breath he said,
"If she isn't to late." Max's eyes were becoming more frantic.
"To late? You getting all soap opera like on me?" Alec looked at her than shook his head in disbelief towards the floor. Max eyes were anxious.
"Was it White or Manticore?" He looked at her and realized how much of what he said she had taken to heart thinking it the best to keep him from getting hurt.
"Neither. It was a group bent on Eyes Only. Asha got the vehicle info and," he paused, "the demands and other such things. I 'm gonna help her get him out of there."
Max nodded her slowly.
"Tell her I am in to."
Time frame: Right after Hello Goodbye (one of the saddest most depressing eppies of all time)
A/N There are about 4 more chapters so review and request and I will post the rest.
It had been week and a half since she told him. Since she lied to him. She thought it was best for him. She walked around everyday telling herself she was saving him and keeping him safe. But it hurt like hell. Every day the little voice was screaming to her louder with each passing day that she shouldn't have lied and she should at least go check on him He doesn't have to know about it, but everyday she beat the voice back. She went into a daily routine of Jam pony Crash and Joshua's. Nothing was changing and she honestly thought it was for the best. Amazed how Alec was right and that regular people and them didn't mesh and they were just a danger. She played the game well. She dulled the pain when she was with people but Cindy worried about her and so did Joshua.
Alec hated to see her in such a way even but he kept thinking it was the right thing to do for all of them. Joshua wouldn't see Annie and Max wouldn't see Logan and his slightly romantic thoughts of Asha were overcoming him but he wouldn't do it to her either. It was painful but it was for the best.
Max was over at a table with Cindy talking about life and other pointless topics as Alec went to the bar to order another pitcher of beer for them. As he waited he looked down the bar and saw Asha standing there talking to someone he never saw before. The man handed her a bunch of papers and her emotions were coming off determined. 'God she's beautiful. No wait dammit Alec you won't let her affect you. Nothing happened, nothing will.' Alec sighed and when the man left Asha suddenly noticed he was a few bar stools over. She glared at him with a hatred he had never seen. Asha sat down and went back to looking at the files handed to her. Alec watched her with interest. She wasn't interested that much when he let her down so what was that all about. Suddenly her face scrunched up at the files and looked like she was going to cry and throw up at the same time. Alec moved towards her.
"What are you looking at?" Her head snapped up and she quickly closed the file before he could glance at it.
"Sorry to break up your own little party but I thought maybe you have something on your mind." 'Dammit Alec what the hell are you doing you need to back off. But if she needs help I suppose it wouldn't kill anyone.' She glared at him.
"Fuck you."
"Why thank you. What is your problem?"
"My problem?" she looked surprised and angry with him. "My problem is your sister over there."
"What did she do to you?" she gave out a cry like laugh as if to indicate what hasn't she done.
"She killed him." Alec knew whom she was talking about but he didn't know what she meant. He may go into depression but Logan was a fighter and he would get over her one day and it was for his own good.
"Who do you mean?"
"Dammit Alec you know very well who the hell I am talking about. Max killed Logan. And it wouldn't surprise me a bit if you were the one who told her to do it."
"She did the right thing. She is a danger to him."
"He can't live without her you know that."
"He can't live with her."
"They would've found a cure. Eventually no matter how long it would have taken he would've found it."
"Yeah but before she accidentally killed him or got him killed by white or Manticore?" She looked him straight in the eye.
"Alec your wrong. I know your wrap. Normal people are in danger around your type blah, blah, blah, but hadn't you ever thought Logan was putting her in just as much danger? That by being an eyes only contact and a do gooder he put her in danger as well? Or that matter you. We aren't normal people. Logan, Max's friends or even me."
"Oh yeah and now your going to tell me how he is throwing himself into his work because of the break up. But that is what he does. He fights and throws himself into work when times get rough and one day it'll pass." She let out a small laugh that clearly said you have no idea.
"No. That isn't how he is taking it. I wouldn't be worried if that were the case." Alec was perplexed.
"Then how is he taking it? "
"The day after he saw her in the apartment something snapped in him. He doesn't eat. I had to actually make him eat in front of me because he kept insisting he didn't need it. He hasn't touched his work since then. The computer has never stayed this cold so long. He dulls the pain with a drinking habit he picked up and I bet he picked up a few tips from his ex- wife on how to dull the pain in that sense. He isn't living anymore. He is a shell that won't tell. He doesn't care about what happens to himself anymore. He disappears way to often and even I can't even track him. The worst thing is he is fighting any more as you put it. He doesn't give a damn about his life style and he isn't fighting to get her back. We both know he would be trying to tell her everything will eventually turn out ok and he would try his damndest. She said something that night that made him step into the shadows and he is slipping away."
"Look, if he knew that this was for his own good then he might not be so hard. Have you tried to tell him where she is coming from? Cause if it gets to out of hand I will spell it out for him." She made a noise that sounded like another laugh but it cracked.
"You won't get the chance."
"What do you mean?" She looked down and tried to stop the stinging in the back of her head and eyes.
"He was nabbed last night." She looked back up at him and his face was filled with lines of concern and disbelief. She went on.
"He was coming across the room to talk to me because of a dire situation requiring help from eyes only and he was there to discuss it so he could refer the problem to someone else. We were at that bar in sector 4. Suddenly there were 3 guys who came up to him and he they said something to him and I can only guess they had guns. He didn't even blink. He could've easily taken them out with his gun and fist with training he picked up from people he meets in his business, but he didn't even try. I think he was waiting for it. He calmly walked out with them and I saw a van drive up and they hit him with the butt of their gun and tossed him in the car. He didn't even flinch." Alec couldn't believe he was hearing this. This was Logan who was all about the fight. He didn't give up like that. But now he was wondering about Asha.
"Why didn't you do something?" Asha looked down again as the tears threatened to fall.
"He looked at me when they approached him and he gave me instructions for a scenario for this once and that I was not to interfere and follow them. Although I am sure he really didn't want me to follow them. I got the license plate number and I managed to get the messages meant for eyes only about Logan." She gestured towards the file she was looking at previously. She closed her eyes as if not wanting to remember something. Alec looked at her and then reached down to the file. He opened it and the first thing on top was a picture of Logan. His eye twitched as he saw it.
Logan was so beaten up and bruised he could barely tell it was him. His face was swelled up and purple, he had a bloody nose there were clean cuts most likely made with a knife over various parts of the body for the worst reaction without actually killing him. It almost looked like there was a bullet hole wound in his right shoulder. His head was hanging down but his expression could be seen. No signs of crying or hatred or of any emotion. Like Asha said his eyes reflected the hollowness he was feeling. Asha regained her composure.
"He can't feel it." Alec looked up at her with his brows furrowed.
"The cuts I mean. He can't feel any of that. He doesn't give a damn about what is happening and what is going to happen. But unlike him or other people I do give a damn and I am going to get him back." Her expression turned pained.
"What?"
"Well the thing is I don't think even if I can bring him back he won't let it happen or he might even try it himself. I can't save his soul this time. Max can only do that." She looked him straight in the eye with an intense look of sadness and determination.
"You and your damn distance."
"Asha don't start."
"No I will. I am not gonna bite Alec. I'm not in any more danger if I get involved with you. I am with the S1W for god's sake! You think you left Manticore? You think Max left Manticore? Hell no!! They have just as much control on you as they did when you were in there! Your emotions never changed and their lessons will always be with you so you might as well be back in there. Unless you let all that shit go then you are no better than the soldier they wanted." Alec's face was unreadable.
"Which you are not." She added.
Alec looked at the picture of Logan again. Then he came up squarely with her.
"I am going to help." She looked at him in wonder. She nodded took the file from him and left the club. Alec took a swig of beer from the pitcher he ordered. He picked it up and took it to Max and Cindy. Max looked up at him with a puzzled look on her face.
"Why were you talking to Asha?" Alec sighed. He didn't want ask her because he didn't know what would happen but he needed to know.
"What did you exactly tell Logan when you broke up with him?" She cast her eyes down.
"That it was over and I can't endanger him."
"Max stop lying." She snapped her head up towards him.
"Come on Max what the hell did you tell him? I need to know." She closed her eyes.
"That day after I got you out of jail and you left my apartment Logan saw us and when I saw him again he thought there was something there. He was drunk and confronted me but I didn't deny it. I told him we were together now and that it was over."
Alec couldn't believe it. She lied to him like that? She said THAT? Good god, no wonder why Logan was giving up. Cindy looked over at her surprised as well. She spoke first.
"You told him THAT? Damn Max that was hitting below the belt." Barely above a whisper she responded.
"I had to." Alec ran his hands through his hair and his breathing was increasing. 'Oh man I can't believe she did that to him. She really did kill him. It is all my fault. Fuck!! Oh damn what the hell are we gonna do now. Oh when Asha hears this she isn't going to believe it.'
Max noticed his frantic stance and the panic passing through his eyes.
"What?" He sighed looked at her and sat down on the chair next to her.
"Max," he went slowly, "Logan was kidnapped yesterday." Her eyes didn't believe it.
"That can't of happened." She retorted. Cindy whistled a slow whistle.
"Damn. Let me guess, the blonde over there is going to get him back." OC said. Alec nodded. Knowing that Logan could let it all go. If he wasn't fighting what they were doing to him then he was a goner. More to himself than anyone under his breath he said,
"If she isn't to late." Max's eyes were becoming more frantic.
"To late? You getting all soap opera like on me?" Alec looked at her than shook his head in disbelief towards the floor. Max eyes were anxious.
"Was it White or Manticore?" He looked at her and realized how much of what he said she had taken to heart thinking it the best to keep him from getting hurt.
"Neither. It was a group bent on Eyes Only. Asha got the vehicle info and," he paused, "the demands and other such things. I 'm gonna help her get him out of there."
Max nodded her slowly.
"Tell her I am in to."