*Disclaimer*- I don't own Rayearth. Although, I wish I did but then again who doesn't wish that they owned Rayearth?! All of the characters belong to CLAMP.

*A Note From the Always Lovely Summoner Firefly*- Sorry, its been awhile since I put this story up! I have been focusing on my humor fics for the last few months and have literally thrown this story and "Lily Vision" out the window! But now I am back and still kicking! I will finish this story no matter how long it takes and believe me I have no idea how long this will take! Originally, this story was only supposed to be two parts that were really long but I seem to have cut up the story into chapters and made it even longer! Sorry! I hope you like it! ^-^

Slowly, as I awake from this dreamless sleep of mine I find that the pain in my heart still lingers on. It seems that no matter how hard I try to forget your face, I cannot forget you. Why am I unable to shake this feeling out of my heart? Was I that much in love with you that I never realized it? But I did realize my feelings towards you. At least Nova did. But why?

As I gradually arise from my bed to look at my broken self in the mirror, I hear a knock at the door. The piercing knock breaks the silence that once existed in this room and causes panic to steadily fill my heart. Then a voice can be heard through the door. One solitary voice is pleading for me to be allowed into my room but I won't let the voice in. The door is locked so there are no worries. At least I think.

I try to ignore the voice and it's pleading but I can't seem to get the voice out of my head. So, I walk over to the door to see who the voice belongs to and then I see his face. Lantis. Why is he here? Doesn't Lantis understand how I truly feel? No, no one understands my heart, not even me.

As I stare through the peep-hole it suddenly comes to me. No one understands the truth that lays hidden in my heart, not even Lantis. That means that I can pretend to have only loved you as a friend and then mask the truth. At least until the time is right for me. Then, I open the door.

Two days have passed since your death and no one suspects a thing. But why does the pain still linger in my heart?

I am sitting at the dinner table and across from me is Lantis, Fuu, and Umi, each staring at me and my plate. I look down at the plate. It's soup. I don't feel like eating a thing but if I want them to leave me alone I must then finish the whole bowl. As I take a sip, I feel the warm soup stinging down my throat and my stomach trying to push it back up but I can't let it. Gradually, each sip stings less and less until I have finally finished this horrible bowl. Now I can be excused from the rest of this dinner and instead go to the garden to sulk by myself.

As I walk by the garden I can still picture myself chasing after you from when you invaded the castle. Then I was mad at you because I truly didn't understand the whole situation but now I can only feel regret for have ever disliking you. More then anything, I wish that there was some way that I could bring you back to life but no there isn't. You are dead. Everyone seems to be realizing the truth and getting over it but I can't. It is then that I realize what I must do.

It has now been a week since your death and no one at all suspects what I am about to do. Everyone thinks that I am only grieved over your death because I loved you like a friend, not a lover. Because of this everyone has allowed me to visit your grave by myself and even have time at the gravesite with no one around me for hours. So, today when I go for my usual visit to your grave I will take my life so that we can once again be together. Then I can finally tell you my true feelings towards you.

Now as I stand at your grave all that I can think about is that how happy that I will be after this is all over. Is that wrong? No, because once I am dead I will finally be rid of all of this pain that still exists in my heart that never seems to lessen or go away. Instead, I will be able to feel pure joy even if it is after death. I stare at your grave once more and kiss my hands softly as I press them one last time on your grave.

Then I call out the strongest spell that I possess and it slowly engulfs me. The fire burns my skin worse and worse as each seconds passes but the pain is no more worse then the pain that still occupies my heart. Finally, the fire totally over powers my body and I collapse to the ground on your grave.

I am lying here on your grave while watching the last few moments of my life pass me by. I should be savoring these last moments with the one that I love. But how can you do that when the one that you love is buried underneath you? Or I should be depressed on how the end of my life is shortly donning near. Instead my heart feels relieved as do I. My heart will soon be rid of the suffering to which it has faced. Watching you die was the worst moment of my life. The days that which followed were only full of that one moment playing over and over again in my head. No one around me suspected a thing because I am good at masking my feelings but I still can't help to feel a little bit of sadness to not be able to see them once again. But there is nothing that I can do.

Alas, in a few moments I will be able to see your face once again, even if it is after death. After death is only a small price to pay to see that warm, inviting smile once more and to tell you how I truly felt. Now it is my time and I can only think of you.

Then I hear a voice call out my name. It is Lantis. But he is to late...

*Another Note from me...the author!*-So what do you think? If you liked it then fear not because this isn't the end! This is only the end of part one! There is a part two that I now will be working on but it will still stay under "Tears of Silence" because I want it to! If you didn't like it then fear not you won't have to read on to see what happens. Either way please review because I would like to know what you people thought of it. Although, if you are going to comment on the way that I am writing this fear not part two will actually have speaking in it but it will still be told from Hikaru's point of view because these are her tears of silence and she needs to tell them! ^-^ Also, I am sorry if there are any grammatical errors because I tried to fix them all but I don't know if I did! Anyway, please review the story!