The Broken Silence
Author's Notes- Back again. ^^ The three reviews really inspired me,
considering it had only been up during the school day. This is Cassie's POV
after Jake, Tobias, and Marco left, and how she takes it. I truly hope you
enjoy it.
I don't think Cassie would ever take the path she does here, but it was
something I had to do. I don't own anything, KA owns
everything but the song, which Caroline King owns.
10-10-03- I'm going back and replacing the stories which had errors with symbols and html and such, even though it's been over a year. Hope you enjoy!
To those who
live for writing, and who writing is life.
'Now and Forever,
I'll remember,
All the promises still unbroken,
I think about all the words between us,
That never needed to be spoken'
~Now and Forever
Caroline King
***
They say that trust is what runs all things, what holds friendships, what
decides your fate. Without trust, you couldn't live a day where you did, couldn't
take any steps where you were, couldn't reach any previously set goals or talk
to people you once trusted. Trust... betrayal. They say that once you are
betrayed, you will never be the same, never be different, never laugh, never
cry, never wish on a star... wish that one person hadn't gone against you, wish
that the others hadn't followed, wished that you could go back just once and
change that word that changed your life. One word, one
step... betrayal. Silence.
He left me three years ago, to the day, to the hour, to the minute... I'll
never forget that time, that moment, that life... how he told me that I have a
place here. He was right, for then... but not now. I can't live like this, so
bottled up and lost to the world like the falcon that flies in the night. A
tear falls down my cheek, and falls to the rolling ocean below.
I'm the last Animorph.
The news came late last night, with an Andalite scout
ship that had been on patrol near the Kelbrid
boundary. They had jettisoned the ship they were on, and found their bodies
inside. They all died slowly, horribly, from lack of oxygen after they
apparently attempted to ram the blade ship. So stupid, so
fruitless... I still don't understand, still don't comprehend. Even
though the funeral is now... I still don't believe it. Believe I'm the only
one, the only hope for Earth. Shouldn't it be Rachel Berenson,
strong beautiful Rachel? Or Jake Berenson,
powerful, amazing Jake? Surely not me; quiet, boring
Cassandra Brown. Even Marco Westgate... funny, funny
Marco... or Tobias Fangor? Why me? How me? How
will I last through the funeral right now?
*******************************************************************
They asked me to make a speech to the Animorphs in
Heaven. This is all I could say, all I could understand. Because no words can
express the love I feel for them.
Marco Westgate... I never knew him too well. The war was our only connection,
our only link, our only tie. Whenever we were in 'sure death' situation, he
would get us out, only if with his enlightening. Knowing Marco, he died making
a joke about the blade ship, trying to say the joke but no oxygen carried his
words. He was so strong... hiding from us the fact that his mother was the one
we must kill... saving his father from the Yeerks...
making the jokes that saved us. Saves our bodies, but also saved much more.
Tobias Fangor. I never took the time to love you
until it was too late; I was never blinder in my life then abandoning you.
Tobias, your father was a great man. He died saving us, and protecting what he
believed in. You took care of Rachel, saved her, and watched us. May your eyes
always watch over and guide us, brother hawk.
Ax. I never took the time to learn your real name well enough. I never needed
to, but now that you're a legend, I may have to. Ever since I heard your plea
for help that summer's night long ago, I've respected you. As a fighter, no one
matches up to you. As a friend, and an ally, you were all that you could be. We
understood your alliance to the Andalites... we
respect you for staying that loyal after so long and so much pain. Although you
never avenged your brother, you are the greatest warrior I've had the privilege
of knowing.
Rachel Berenson. I know you didn't die in this
battle, but you deserve to be mentioned here in the middle. Because you were
our center, our backbone, our strength... you taught me how to match outfits as
well as fight with the best of them. There isn't much else to say- you know all
of it. You've known me way too long, my friend.
Jake Berenson, Fearless Leader, Prince Jake... Jake,
you were all of them. You led us through the best and worst times. You didn't
fall when it came to your family. You made the right decision in everything you
chose, and I mean that. Others may think less of you, but you did what you had
to do. And Jake, I love you for it. I always have, always will love you for it.
You meant so much to me, I didn't know how to express
it. When you asked me to marry you, I wanted with all my heart to say yes. But
the mission came first, we both knew it. Jake, you were the first and only
person that I have loved as much as respected. Trust me, it's more than you can
imagine.
I love you all so much, more than the sky above. Perhaps now, as I cry, the
tears that are for you will find their way to the clouds of Heaven, and I can
be with you. I truly love you all.
**********************************************************************
The funeral ended seven hours ago- I'm the only one left here now. The Berenson's just left... crying out, screaming for even one
son lost to the war to return. The Westgates... Eva,
yelling to the Maker to take her instead... you really don't
understand people until you see them in death. You wouldn't see me sitting on
the rocks next to the ocean crying at two in the morning usually, but because
their ashes are all here... I feel like I have to be here. With
my friends. Dead. Why wasn't I there? I should
be. I should be dead. I should be dead. I should be dead. I loved them all so
much, Maker, I loved them. Why? Why? Why?
My tears will never reach Heaven, there isn't a chance. It's too big a world,
to slim a chance. But in death? Maybe only then will I
see them. I can't wait that long. I won't wait that long. Jake, Rachel, Tobias,
Marco, Ax... I'll see you so very soon. I love you too much to hold on. Just
give me the chance at forgiven for what I'm about to do.
'And I wish I could always be with you,
The way we used to do,
Now and forever,
I will always think of you,
Now and forever,
I will always be with you...'