Pt. 11: A Leap Of Faith
As she felt the solid ground beneath her feet, stars flashed in a monochromatic staccato rhythm against her closed eyelids. As soon as she found the strength to open her eyes Whistler was there, trying helpfully to guide her to her feet- while simultaneously trying to dry her tears. But it was too late or too soon, she didn't know which. Her legs were nerveless; her emotions in a shambles and Whistler soon gave her up to her pain; her wish to just curl up in a ball and disappear as the pain buffeted her crumbling defenses.
Time seemed to stop on that quiet hillside with the bright glory of the sunshine surrounding her in a sympathetic embrace. She just could not wrap her head around all that she had witnessed and the change of heart that had accompanied all this strange and dark new knowledge. It hurt like a physical wound, she thought she had experienced complete and utter agony once before but she had never felt as bad as this before, never. It amazed her, how one moment Angel had been her whole life, everything she had ever wanted and now, losing him didn't seem like the end. Now if she could just get home it would be the beginning, the beginning of a love so strong nothing could break it, not God, or man, or death and certainly not Angel.
Buffy pulled her face up to meet Whistler, gazing at him with still wet, red-rimmed eyes as she softly spoke. "Is this everything I needed to know before I make my decision about whether to go back or not?"
Across from her, perched on a dazzling piece of granite shimmering in the sun Whistler continued to watch her. "What do you think?" The demon replied lackadaisically.
That was the real last straw for Buffy, she gained her feet in seconds and knocked the demon to the ground with exquisite force. She was good at force, when words couldn't get something done, violence was usually an improvement in tactics. At least it had always worked for her and it made her feel better at the same time, after all the watching she had done today- it was good to get back into the action.
"LISTEN TO ME YOU SELF RIGHTEOUS ASSHOLE, I'VE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OF THIS CRYPTIC CRAP, ALRIGHT! TELL ME HOW TO GET HOME RIGHT NOW OR YOU'RE GOING TO FIND YOURSELF ON THE WRONG END OF A STAKE, AND WITH ME THAT'S A VERY DANGEROUS PLACE TO BE!" Fire flickered in the slayer's eyes, cold miniature bolts of lightning flashing brilliantly with a powerful and ominous warning.
"Jeez, Buff! You're in quite the mood today, I thought we went over this already, I thought we were friends? There's no need for violence... I was just joking, ok! Cool it!" Whistler pushed the girl away hastily, she might be small but she was incredibly strong and at the moment very angry, a lethal combination.
"Oh, great point Whistler, Why should I be in a good mood?" Buffy retorted angrily. "I mean what did I do today? oh yeah I died, I watched my friends die and stood by as the man I loved was sliced open and left to bleed to death on the dirty floor of a stinking, vampire infested warehouse. I've had crappy days before, Whistler but this has got to take the cake. Add to it the load of crap you've put me through and I'd say this has to be the worst day in the history of humankind!" She was running out of steam now, she just wanted to go back home if she could. "Please Whistler, can I go home now?" Buffy whispered achingly.
"Is this your final decision?" Whistler countered "You choose to return to your world, and you understand why it is SO important that you choose wisely?"
"Yes!" Buffy returned humbly, "I just want to go home. Now, how do I do it?" She pleaded.
Whistler watched her with kindness. "All you have to do is take a leap of faith." Whistler smiled at her, as his eyes looked meaningfully beyond her towards the cliff face visible just over her shoulder. In confusion Buffy glared at him and then turned back towards the impossibly high and extremely scary edge of the bluff on which she stood.
The slayer laughed uncomfortably. "You want me to jump..." she smiled oddly and waved her hand at the ridge, "...off of that?" "I don't think so, this could all be some crazy plot to kill me, a get rid of the slayer scenario! It's crazy!" They had managed to find her one weak spot, she wasn't afraid of 'little' heights, i.e. roofs and stuff, but this drop was big, big, big, there was no confusing it with little here. Just standing near the edge of it made her dizzy.
Whistler was still smiling. "You're already dead, Buff, and this is the only way.
If you wanna go back and stop whatever nastiness you saw occurring in the future."
Buffy stared at him; she was chewing thoughtfully on her bottom lip, all her uneasiness manifesting itself in that minute gesture. She walked to the very edge of the cliff, and closed her eyes in indecision. If she really trusted Whistler, then this was the only way, the only way home to Xander and the life she had dreamed of since she'd been a little girl and read her first fairytale. Where the handsome prince and beautiful princess conquered their demons and lived happily ever after.
Then a powerful voice spoke up in the back of her mind. You're the risk taker, aren't you? The fearless slayer, conqueror of all things evil? Even if this is all in your imagination, some deluded dream/nightmare, isn't it worth it to take the plunge? Look at what you'll win if it works, If you ever doubted Xander and his love for you, then back out of it now, but if he never gave you a moment of doubt, then jump. because how can you lose? How can you lose with love on your side? At these words Buffy felt an immense smile break out upon her face.
Whistler watched the slayer earnestly, worried, when suddenly she half turned to face him, and he felt all traces of reservation leave him. The smile upon her face spoke volumes; shone brighter than the sun, in all his years of observation of the human species he had never once seen anything to compare it to. It was pure happiness; all bliss experienced throughout centuries portrayed in one incredible moment of decision, and commitment. It was the look of love, or at least what love would surely look like if it was a solid, material object. It was immeasurably beautiful and for the moment Whistler felt how empty his life had been before he had ever seen that look, and it gave him hope.
He watched entranced as the once fearful slayer gazed upon the space before her, then in a heartbeat she threw her arms behind her in a wide arc and dove towards the clear azure sea below her. Whistler moved forward to watch her on her wingless flight, and smiled as she plummeted to the water below. Where she disappeared before she reached the water, as if she had been plucked out of the air by some unseen hand. He began to whistle a jaunty tune as he walked towards the calm, cool beauty of the forest a few feet away.
As she felt the solid ground beneath her feet, stars flashed in a monochromatic staccato rhythm against her closed eyelids. As soon as she found the strength to open her eyes Whistler was there, trying helpfully to guide her to her feet- while simultaneously trying to dry her tears. But it was too late or too soon, she didn't know which. Her legs were nerveless; her emotions in a shambles and Whistler soon gave her up to her pain; her wish to just curl up in a ball and disappear as the pain buffeted her crumbling defenses.
Time seemed to stop on that quiet hillside with the bright glory of the sunshine surrounding her in a sympathetic embrace. She just could not wrap her head around all that she had witnessed and the change of heart that had accompanied all this strange and dark new knowledge. It hurt like a physical wound, she thought she had experienced complete and utter agony once before but she had never felt as bad as this before, never. It amazed her, how one moment Angel had been her whole life, everything she had ever wanted and now, losing him didn't seem like the end. Now if she could just get home it would be the beginning, the beginning of a love so strong nothing could break it, not God, or man, or death and certainly not Angel.
Buffy pulled her face up to meet Whistler, gazing at him with still wet, red-rimmed eyes as she softly spoke. "Is this everything I needed to know before I make my decision about whether to go back or not?"
Across from her, perched on a dazzling piece of granite shimmering in the sun Whistler continued to watch her. "What do you think?" The demon replied lackadaisically.
That was the real last straw for Buffy, she gained her feet in seconds and knocked the demon to the ground with exquisite force. She was good at force, when words couldn't get something done, violence was usually an improvement in tactics. At least it had always worked for her and it made her feel better at the same time, after all the watching she had done today- it was good to get back into the action.
"LISTEN TO ME YOU SELF RIGHTEOUS ASSHOLE, I'VE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OF THIS CRYPTIC CRAP, ALRIGHT! TELL ME HOW TO GET HOME RIGHT NOW OR YOU'RE GOING TO FIND YOURSELF ON THE WRONG END OF A STAKE, AND WITH ME THAT'S A VERY DANGEROUS PLACE TO BE!" Fire flickered in the slayer's eyes, cold miniature bolts of lightning flashing brilliantly with a powerful and ominous warning.
"Jeez, Buff! You're in quite the mood today, I thought we went over this already, I thought we were friends? There's no need for violence... I was just joking, ok! Cool it!" Whistler pushed the girl away hastily, she might be small but she was incredibly strong and at the moment very angry, a lethal combination.
"Oh, great point Whistler, Why should I be in a good mood?" Buffy retorted angrily. "I mean what did I do today? oh yeah I died, I watched my friends die and stood by as the man I loved was sliced open and left to bleed to death on the dirty floor of a stinking, vampire infested warehouse. I've had crappy days before, Whistler but this has got to take the cake. Add to it the load of crap you've put me through and I'd say this has to be the worst day in the history of humankind!" She was running out of steam now, she just wanted to go back home if she could. "Please Whistler, can I go home now?" Buffy whispered achingly.
"Is this your final decision?" Whistler countered "You choose to return to your world, and you understand why it is SO important that you choose wisely?"
"Yes!" Buffy returned humbly, "I just want to go home. Now, how do I do it?" She pleaded.
Whistler watched her with kindness. "All you have to do is take a leap of faith." Whistler smiled at her, as his eyes looked meaningfully beyond her towards the cliff face visible just over her shoulder. In confusion Buffy glared at him and then turned back towards the impossibly high and extremely scary edge of the bluff on which she stood.
The slayer laughed uncomfortably. "You want me to jump..." she smiled oddly and waved her hand at the ridge, "...off of that?" "I don't think so, this could all be some crazy plot to kill me, a get rid of the slayer scenario! It's crazy!" They had managed to find her one weak spot, she wasn't afraid of 'little' heights, i.e. roofs and stuff, but this drop was big, big, big, there was no confusing it with little here. Just standing near the edge of it made her dizzy.
Whistler was still smiling. "You're already dead, Buff, and this is the only way.
If you wanna go back and stop whatever nastiness you saw occurring in the future."
Buffy stared at him; she was chewing thoughtfully on her bottom lip, all her uneasiness manifesting itself in that minute gesture. She walked to the very edge of the cliff, and closed her eyes in indecision. If she really trusted Whistler, then this was the only way, the only way home to Xander and the life she had dreamed of since she'd been a little girl and read her first fairytale. Where the handsome prince and beautiful princess conquered their demons and lived happily ever after.
Then a powerful voice spoke up in the back of her mind. You're the risk taker, aren't you? The fearless slayer, conqueror of all things evil? Even if this is all in your imagination, some deluded dream/nightmare, isn't it worth it to take the plunge? Look at what you'll win if it works, If you ever doubted Xander and his love for you, then back out of it now, but if he never gave you a moment of doubt, then jump. because how can you lose? How can you lose with love on your side? At these words Buffy felt an immense smile break out upon her face.
Whistler watched the slayer earnestly, worried, when suddenly she half turned to face him, and he felt all traces of reservation leave him. The smile upon her face spoke volumes; shone brighter than the sun, in all his years of observation of the human species he had never once seen anything to compare it to. It was pure happiness; all bliss experienced throughout centuries portrayed in one incredible moment of decision, and commitment. It was the look of love, or at least what love would surely look like if it was a solid, material object. It was immeasurably beautiful and for the moment Whistler felt how empty his life had been before he had ever seen that look, and it gave him hope.
He watched entranced as the once fearful slayer gazed upon the space before her, then in a heartbeat she threw her arms behind her in a wide arc and dove towards the clear azure sea below her. Whistler moved forward to watch her on her wingless flight, and smiled as she plummeted to the water below. Where she disappeared before she reached the water, as if she had been plucked out of the air by some unseen hand. He began to whistle a jaunty tune as he walked towards the calm, cool beauty of the forest a few feet away.