Chapter 4

I don't remember how I got home from Hogsmeade. It was cold and snowing hard. My tears froze to my face as the icy wind blasted me with its force. The first person I saw when I got back to Hogwarts was Hermione.

"Ginny! What's wrong? What's on earth's happened?" Hermione grabbed my shoulders, looking worriedly into my bloodshot eyes.

I drew in a ragged breath. "I- I- Malfoy… I-" I couldn't get the words out.

"What? What has he done to you, Ginny? Oh my God, he hasn't…?!" panic shot across Hermione's face. I didn't know what she thought he'd done but I shook my head anyway. She couldn't have predicted what had gone on.

Furiously wiping at the tears that insisted on falling from my eyes, I couldn't take it any more. I pulled free of Hermione's grasp and ran until I was out of her sight. I heard her calling my name but I didn't- couldn't- turn back. I stopped by the steps where I'd been last night and sank down in a small alcove. The snow was still falling, but I was sheltered here.

Pulling my cloak around me, and the hood over my head, I heard Malfoy's words hissing unceasingly in my ear.

"You're pathetic, Weasley. You're not worth my time." Not worth his time? I hadn't intended to waste his damn time. I didn't know what I'd done to deserve that treatment. Standing so close to him as I had been, I was sure I could see something more than malice in those eyes. Something deeper. Something that made me think I was right about him- there was more to him. But then he opened his mouth and a flow of pure hatred came out. How could he do that? A fresh rise of hot tears sprang into my eyes. I tried to blink them away. Crying wasn't going to help. Crying wouldn't bring Malfoy here so I could make him tell me what the hell he was playing at. Why he showed interest in me- then threw it away. Why.

As much as I loathed admitting it, the only thing that could make me happy now was him. In some converse way, the only person who could take this pain away from me was the one who had given it. But in my heart I knew that wasn't going to happen. He was obviously somewhere else right now, probably with Pansy, definitely not thinking about me. My heart ached seemingly unreasonably. I should have listened to Ron. To Harry. Or Hermione. I should have trusted their judgement. But I still didn't want to. For some reason, a part of me still wanted to believe that Malfoy was someone I could call a friend. At least. It didn't help that whenever he fixed me with that evil look of his- I melted. I hate it. I can't help it.

Sighing, I shivered and pulled my cloak tighter around me. I should go inside. I expect Hermione will be looking for me. A few last tears dropped from my eyes as I raised my head to wipe them away. The sight that greeted me made my heart miss a beat. Before me stood Draco Malfoy. A rush of instinctive anger coursed through me.

"Just leave me alone. Haven't you done enough already? " Why did I say that? The last thing I wanted now was for him to leave me again. But still, he had to know how angry I was with him.

He glared down at me for a second, and I was afraid he was going to shout at me again, but then his gaze softened. "No, I haven't." He said quietly. "There's something I forgot to do before…" He extended his hand towards me. I looked at it, unsure of whether to trust him or not. I felt my hand held tight in his as he pulled me up easily.

All traces of expression were lost from his face as he leaned in and kissed me. After the last few hours consumed with an absolute feeling of total rejection, this was as if I was wanted again. Like I'd been deprived of something I was addicted to, and then it was given back to me. I wrapped my arms round his neck. It was if I was saying, don't go, don't leave me again.

Suddenly, panicked voices broke into my reverie. Calling me. Alarm shot through me. I pulled away from Malfoy, as if to disguise the bizarre nature of what had just happened from my three best friends. I couldn't let them find out what had happened. They would never understand.

Still calling, their voices got nearer. I couldn't respond. I looked at Malfoy, who looked calm as ever, a slight smirk playing around his lips as he waited, a look of amused anticipation on his face.

"Ginny! Thank God you're ok!" Hermione looked as if she might cry as she rushed over and hugged me. "What on earth are you doing out here with him?"

"N-Nothing," I stammered.

"You've got some nerve Malfoy. Just leave my sister alone, you hear me? Or I'll curse you." Ron's protective big brother act faltered slightly as he pushed his broken wand at Malfoy.

"You'll curse me? You'll be lucky, you couldn't manage a simple transfiguration spell with that poor excuse for a wand," Malfoy drawled. I glared at him.

"Just ignore him Ron." Hermione, the peacekeeper intervened.

Just what exactly was Malfoy going to say to them? I tried to get his attention- tried to tell him not to say anything, but he ignored me.

"Come on, let's go. We don't have to tolerate this," Harry said, maturely as ever, as he led us up the steps and through the doors. I caught Malfoy's eye as the door swung shut. He looked so satisfied with himself… so smug. Reality hit me as we made our way to the Gryffindor tower- what had I just done?

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