MORE MARVEL NEWS
By: Joey de Clorox (yet again I'm just coping stuff for you amusement)
I'm putting this in the Lastest From the News Desk 'cuz it kinda goes with it.
:RED ALERT: IF YOU LIKE BRITNEY SPEARS STOP READING THIS RIGHT NOW!!!
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In yet another move to attract a younger fanbase, marvel bought the
rights to Britney Spears from her
family Saturday in New Orleans.
"We're gonna introduce her to the Ultimate X-Men team this October,"
Marvel Editor-in-Chief Joe Quesada.
"In that timeline, she's going to be Jean Grey's long-lost twin
sister who just happens to
were toob tops, too."
The news brought a visable tear to Ultimate writer Mark Miller's eye.
"This is fantastic,"Miller said."She's the girl that went and got DD
boobs and now ever Bob Dole
wants to shag her. I think I'll make her mutant power the ability to
shake her butt, becouse it's explaninable. Like Jean Gray's telekinetics and Cyclps' ability to shoot
force rays from his eyes.
They're not like that Gambit dork. How the heck does he make things
explode, huh?"
Spears will not be limited to the Ultimate time line. She will also
appear in Morrison's NUDE X-Men.
"Didn't you see the way I had Quietly draw White Queen?" Morrison
asked. "Same hair, slutty outfit... sure she had a male package, but I can easily say she's a
hermaphrodite. So Britney is
going to be Emma's protege and lesbian sex slave in NUDE X-Men."
Finally, in what might be the final humiliation for Cabana Claremont, it
was announced that not only
is he the janitor, cabana boy, and penning the new "Artie an dLeech"
ongoing, he also no longer has a
desk. Instead, he will do his work on a big rock sitting outside the
Marvel offices.
"We're really trying to make an effort to connect with the new readers,"
Quesada said."By moving
Cabana Claremont outside, he can get more in touch with the world around him,
and learn how to write."
Claremont could not be reached for comment. On his rock outside was a
taped note that cryptically
read "I quit." Sources can't identify what exactly Claremont meant by his
note.
======================================================================================================
By: Joey de Clorox (yet again I'm just coping stuff for you amusement)
I'm putting this in the Lastest From the News Desk 'cuz it kinda goes with it.
:RED ALERT: IF YOU LIKE BRITNEY SPEARS STOP READING THIS RIGHT NOW!!!
=======================================================================================================
In yet another move to attract a younger fanbase, marvel bought the
rights to Britney Spears from her
family Saturday in New Orleans.
"We're gonna introduce her to the Ultimate X-Men team this October,"
Marvel Editor-in-Chief Joe Quesada.
"In that timeline, she's going to be Jean Grey's long-lost twin
sister who just happens to
were toob tops, too."
The news brought a visable tear to Ultimate writer Mark Miller's eye.
"This is fantastic,"Miller said."She's the girl that went and got DD
boobs and now ever Bob Dole
wants to shag her. I think I'll make her mutant power the ability to
shake her butt, becouse it's explaninable. Like Jean Gray's telekinetics and Cyclps' ability to shoot
force rays from his eyes.
They're not like that Gambit dork. How the heck does he make things
explode, huh?"
Spears will not be limited to the Ultimate time line. She will also
appear in Morrison's NUDE X-Men.
"Didn't you see the way I had Quietly draw White Queen?" Morrison
asked. "Same hair, slutty outfit... sure she had a male package, but I can easily say she's a
hermaphrodite. So Britney is
going to be Emma's protege and lesbian sex slave in NUDE X-Men."
Finally, in what might be the final humiliation for Cabana Claremont, it
was announced that not only
is he the janitor, cabana boy, and penning the new "Artie an dLeech"
ongoing, he also no longer has a
desk. Instead, he will do his work on a big rock sitting outside the
Marvel offices.
"We're really trying to make an effort to connect with the new readers,"
Quesada said."By moving
Cabana Claremont outside, he can get more in touch with the world around him,
and learn how to write."
Claremont could not be reached for comment. On his rock outside was a
taped note that cryptically
read "I quit." Sources can't identify what exactly Claremont meant by his
note.
======================================================================================================