Marvel's Releases New Power Grid
Rated:G
Note: If you want to know who wrote this look at the other two before this. This about the new
power grid Marvel has. It's very funny!
*****************************************************************************************
NEW YORK- It appears Marvel's new power grid isn't just going to be for the charatures.
Joe Quesada, Editor-in-chief, has devised a new power grid sysem to rate his own staff.
"It seemed like the right thing to do, 'Quesada said. "It's jsut another effort on our part to
reach all those new readers.
The system will rate the talent from 1 (being the worst) to 10 (being the best)
"I think I did a faerly accurate job, Quesada said.
A sampling of fome of the artist's grids were released:
Mark Millar
**********
Writing-10
Interviewing-10
Popularity-10
Creativity-10
Chris Claremont
***************
Writing-1
Interviewing-3
Popularity- (-3)
Creativity-2
Fabian Nicezia
**************
Writing-?
Interviewing-?
Popularity-?
Creativity-?
Note to self... Does he still work here???
Wolverine
*********
Writing-1,110
Interviewing-212
Popularity-1,375,038
Creativity-3,244
When asked why Claremont's scores were so low, Quesada responded "He keeps finding that dead
spot on the rock, which makes his writing all squiggly. His mai tais have been pretty weak
lately, too."
ULTIMATE 3K
Marvel will also be introducing a new comic book in December 2001.
"It's a totally new concept that nobody has ever done before!" Quesada exclaimed. "We're gonna
have me, Joe Quesada, sit in a movie theater with Jubilee and Rogue. We'll watch cheesey
Marvel comics and make fun of them!"
A theme song for it has already been posted on Marvel.com, the lyrics are as follows:
"In the not-too-distant future-
Next Sunday A. D.-
There was a guy named Joe,
not too different from you of me.
He worked at Stan Lee's Marvel Comics,
Just another great Editor-in-Chief.
He did a good job cleaning up the the place,
But the fans didn't like him
So they shot him into space.
We'll send him cheesy comics,
The worst we can find (la-la-la)
He'll have to sit and watch them all,
And we'll monitor him mind(la-la-la)
Now keep in mind Joe can't control
Where the comics vegin or end (la-la-la)
Becouse he used those special parts
To make hes comic friends.
Comic Roll Call: (All right, let's go!)
Gambit: (You'll never see me!)
Kitty: (I'm a girl!)
Jubilee: (What a cool guy!)
Roooogue: (He's a wisecracker!)
If your wondering how he eats and breathes
and other science facts (la-la-la)
Then repeat to yourself, "It's jsut a book,
I should really just relax
For Marvel Science Theater 3000!"
"It's a totally original concpet, "Quesada sand. "No one has ever done anything like it in any
entertainment medium."
***********************************************************************************************
Hope you like. Oh and by the way I have no ill feelings tourds Gambit. I think he is a babe.
Rated:G
Note: If you want to know who wrote this look at the other two before this. This about the new
power grid Marvel has. It's very funny!
*****************************************************************************************
NEW YORK- It appears Marvel's new power grid isn't just going to be for the charatures.
Joe Quesada, Editor-in-chief, has devised a new power grid sysem to rate his own staff.
"It seemed like the right thing to do, 'Quesada said. "It's jsut another effort on our part to
reach all those new readers.
The system will rate the talent from 1 (being the worst) to 10 (being the best)
"I think I did a faerly accurate job, Quesada said.
A sampling of fome of the artist's grids were released:
Mark Millar
**********
Writing-10
Interviewing-10
Popularity-10
Creativity-10
Chris Claremont
***************
Writing-1
Interviewing-3
Popularity- (-3)
Creativity-2
Fabian Nicezia
**************
Writing-?
Interviewing-?
Popularity-?
Creativity-?
Note to self... Does he still work here???
Wolverine
*********
Writing-1,110
Interviewing-212
Popularity-1,375,038
Creativity-3,244
When asked why Claremont's scores were so low, Quesada responded "He keeps finding that dead
spot on the rock, which makes his writing all squiggly. His mai tais have been pretty weak
lately, too."
ULTIMATE 3K
Marvel will also be introducing a new comic book in December 2001.
"It's a totally new concept that nobody has ever done before!" Quesada exclaimed. "We're gonna
have me, Joe Quesada, sit in a movie theater with Jubilee and Rogue. We'll watch cheesey
Marvel comics and make fun of them!"
A theme song for it has already been posted on Marvel.com, the lyrics are as follows:
"In the not-too-distant future-
Next Sunday A. D.-
There was a guy named Joe,
not too different from you of me.
He worked at Stan Lee's Marvel Comics,
Just another great Editor-in-Chief.
He did a good job cleaning up the the place,
But the fans didn't like him
So they shot him into space.
We'll send him cheesy comics,
The worst we can find (la-la-la)
He'll have to sit and watch them all,
And we'll monitor him mind(la-la-la)
Now keep in mind Joe can't control
Where the comics vegin or end (la-la-la)
Becouse he used those special parts
To make hes comic friends.
Comic Roll Call: (All right, let's go!)
Gambit: (You'll never see me!)
Kitty: (I'm a girl!)
Jubilee: (What a cool guy!)
Roooogue: (He's a wisecracker!)
If your wondering how he eats and breathes
and other science facts (la-la-la)
Then repeat to yourself, "It's jsut a book,
I should really just relax
For Marvel Science Theater 3000!"
"It's a totally original concpet, "Quesada sand. "No one has ever done anything like it in any
entertainment medium."
***********************************************************************************************
Hope you like. Oh and by the way I have no ill feelings tourds Gambit. I think he is a babe.