A/N- Thanks for the reviews! In reply to Elfstone's Maiden, I do have lots
more comedy stuff out under the penname The Evenstar, so check that out if
you like my work. In reply to Little Rat......Gandalf's birthday is
celebrated by....well, you'll just have to read below and find out won't
you?
(P.S - I know Aragorn's birthday is on 1st March, but in this Fic it is on 2nd April, so that will be something else to look forwardf to. I am also currently writing the sequel to this which is called 'The Growing Pains of Aragorn King of Gondor'.
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The Diary of Aragorn age 42 and 3 Quarters
March
Thursday 5th March
Elrond got his car back from the garage today. He was cleaning it and gloating over it for a full two hours. We drove to Gandalf's to test drive the car. He gave us a cup of Bovril and some yukky seed cake. Gandalf didn't ask how Galadriel was. He just said that Elrond needed fattening up and then he gave him another peice of seed cake.
Sunday 8th March
Arwen went to a woman's workshop so me and Elrond had boil in the bag cod in butter sauce followed by peaches and Dreamtopping for lunch. Afterwards we watched a film on the television, but then Arwen came home and started bossing us around. She started saying things like ''The worm has turned!'' and ''Things are going to be different around here!'' and then she went into the kitchen and divided the chores up into a chart. Then she said ''We start tommorow.''
Monday 9th March
Cleaned toilet, washed basin and sink, made breakfast, put washing in the machine, woke Legolas up, braided his hair, and cleaned the breakfast dished before starting on my Kingly duties. Just my luck to have an assertive wife!
Sunday 15th March
The castle is very quiet. Celeborn sits in the spare room smoking and Galadriel sits in the bedroom smoking. Arwen said she wished they would hurry up and get divorced.
Thranduil has phoned Galadriel three times. All she says to him is ''Not yet! It's too soon...'' Perhaps he had asked her to go for a drink to take her mind of her troubles?
Celeborn has put the stereo in the spare room. He is playing his Jim Reeves records and staring out of the window. I took him a cup of tea and he said ''Thanks lad.'' in a choked up voice. Galadriel was looking at old letters in Celeborn's handwriting when I took her tea in. She said ''Oh Aragorn, what must you think of us?'' I said that Gandalf thinks divorce is society's fault. Galadriel said ''Bugger society''.
I am reading The Man In The Iron Mask.....I know exactly how he feels.
Saturday 21st March
Celeborn and Galadriel are eating their meals at different times so I usually end up having 6 meals a day because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I am starting to get a bit suspicious about Galadriel's intentions towards Thranduil. I found a note to her that said ''How much longer? For God's sake come away with me- Thrandy.''
Sunday 22nd March
It was Gandalf's birthday today but he won't tell anyone how old he is. I took him a pot plant. The plant had a label stuck in the soil that said 'The sap of this plant is poisonous'. Gandalf asked who had chosen the plant. I told him that Arwen had.
Gandalf is quite pleased that Celeborn and Galadriel are getting divorced. He said he knew that Galadriel had always had a wanton streak in her and now he has been proved right.
Tuesday 24th March
I saw Galadriel getting into a car with Thranduil earlier. They must have been going somewhere special because Galadriel was wearing her boiler suit with sequins. She did look a bit wanton. I am going to stay awake and see what time they come back.
Midnight
Galadriel still not home
2.00am
No sign of Galadriel
Wednesday 25th March
Fell asleep. Don't know when Galadriel came in. Celeborn said that she had gone to Tom Bombadil's Christmas Dinner and Dance. In March?! Come off it Celeborn, I was not born yesterday!
Thursday 26th March
Gimli has been done for riding a bike without a rear light. I hope he gets sent down. I short sharp shock will do him good.
Saturday 28th March
I told Legolas about my suspicions over Galadriel and he told me that the affair has been going on for a good while! The only people not to know were me and Celeborn! I hope Legolas is proud of his Father for breaking up our home.
Galadriel has organised a 'Civilised' meeting for Monday. Thranduil is going to be there. Me, the hobbits and Gimli have been excluded, but we will listen in at the door.
Tuesday 31st March
A terrible thing happened last night. Celeborn and Thranduil had a FIGHT in the courtyard and everyone in Minas Tirith came out to watch! Galadriel tried to seperate them but they told her to keep out of it. Elrond tried to help Celeborn. He kept shouting ''Give the smarmy bugger one for me Celeborn!''. Arwen was shouting terrible things at her Grandmother. The 'Civilised' meeting broke up at five o clock when Celeborn discovered how long Galadriel and Thranduil have been in love.
They had another 'Civilised' meeting at seven o clock, but when Galadriel disclosed that she was going to Mirkwood with Thranduil, Celeborn became uncivilised and started fighting again. Thranduil ran outside and Celeborn rugby-tackled him by the laurel bush. It was quite exciting really. I had a good view from my balcony. Then someone said ''It's the King that I feel sorry for.'' and everyone looked at me in this really pitying way. I expect this experiance will give me trauma at some point in the future.
8.00pm
Galadriel has gone to Mirkwood with Thranduil. She had to drive because he couldn't see out of his two black eyes.
(P.S - I know Aragorn's birthday is on 1st March, but in this Fic it is on 2nd April, so that will be something else to look forwardf to. I am also currently writing the sequel to this which is called 'The Growing Pains of Aragorn King of Gondor'.
*********************************************************************
The Diary of Aragorn age 42 and 3 Quarters
March
Thursday 5th March
Elrond got his car back from the garage today. He was cleaning it and gloating over it for a full two hours. We drove to Gandalf's to test drive the car. He gave us a cup of Bovril and some yukky seed cake. Gandalf didn't ask how Galadriel was. He just said that Elrond needed fattening up and then he gave him another peice of seed cake.
Sunday 8th March
Arwen went to a woman's workshop so me and Elrond had boil in the bag cod in butter sauce followed by peaches and Dreamtopping for lunch. Afterwards we watched a film on the television, but then Arwen came home and started bossing us around. She started saying things like ''The worm has turned!'' and ''Things are going to be different around here!'' and then she went into the kitchen and divided the chores up into a chart. Then she said ''We start tommorow.''
Monday 9th March
Cleaned toilet, washed basin and sink, made breakfast, put washing in the machine, woke Legolas up, braided his hair, and cleaned the breakfast dished before starting on my Kingly duties. Just my luck to have an assertive wife!
Sunday 15th March
The castle is very quiet. Celeborn sits in the spare room smoking and Galadriel sits in the bedroom smoking. Arwen said she wished they would hurry up and get divorced.
Thranduil has phoned Galadriel three times. All she says to him is ''Not yet! It's too soon...'' Perhaps he had asked her to go for a drink to take her mind of her troubles?
Celeborn has put the stereo in the spare room. He is playing his Jim Reeves records and staring out of the window. I took him a cup of tea and he said ''Thanks lad.'' in a choked up voice. Galadriel was looking at old letters in Celeborn's handwriting when I took her tea in. She said ''Oh Aragorn, what must you think of us?'' I said that Gandalf thinks divorce is society's fault. Galadriel said ''Bugger society''.
I am reading The Man In The Iron Mask.....I know exactly how he feels.
Saturday 21st March
Celeborn and Galadriel are eating their meals at different times so I usually end up having 6 meals a day because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I am starting to get a bit suspicious about Galadriel's intentions towards Thranduil. I found a note to her that said ''How much longer? For God's sake come away with me- Thrandy.''
Sunday 22nd March
It was Gandalf's birthday today but he won't tell anyone how old he is. I took him a pot plant. The plant had a label stuck in the soil that said 'The sap of this plant is poisonous'. Gandalf asked who had chosen the plant. I told him that Arwen had.
Gandalf is quite pleased that Celeborn and Galadriel are getting divorced. He said he knew that Galadriel had always had a wanton streak in her and now he has been proved right.
Tuesday 24th March
I saw Galadriel getting into a car with Thranduil earlier. They must have been going somewhere special because Galadriel was wearing her boiler suit with sequins. She did look a bit wanton. I am going to stay awake and see what time they come back.
Midnight
Galadriel still not home
2.00am
No sign of Galadriel
Wednesday 25th March
Fell asleep. Don't know when Galadriel came in. Celeborn said that she had gone to Tom Bombadil's Christmas Dinner and Dance. In March?! Come off it Celeborn, I was not born yesterday!
Thursday 26th March
Gimli has been done for riding a bike without a rear light. I hope he gets sent down. I short sharp shock will do him good.
Saturday 28th March
I told Legolas about my suspicions over Galadriel and he told me that the affair has been going on for a good while! The only people not to know were me and Celeborn! I hope Legolas is proud of his Father for breaking up our home.
Galadriel has organised a 'Civilised' meeting for Monday. Thranduil is going to be there. Me, the hobbits and Gimli have been excluded, but we will listen in at the door.
Tuesday 31st March
A terrible thing happened last night. Celeborn and Thranduil had a FIGHT in the courtyard and everyone in Minas Tirith came out to watch! Galadriel tried to seperate them but they told her to keep out of it. Elrond tried to help Celeborn. He kept shouting ''Give the smarmy bugger one for me Celeborn!''. Arwen was shouting terrible things at her Grandmother. The 'Civilised' meeting broke up at five o clock when Celeborn discovered how long Galadriel and Thranduil have been in love.
They had another 'Civilised' meeting at seven o clock, but when Galadriel disclosed that she was going to Mirkwood with Thranduil, Celeborn became uncivilised and started fighting again. Thranduil ran outside and Celeborn rugby-tackled him by the laurel bush. It was quite exciting really. I had a good view from my balcony. Then someone said ''It's the King that I feel sorry for.'' and everyone looked at me in this really pitying way. I expect this experiance will give me trauma at some point in the future.
8.00pm
Galadriel has gone to Mirkwood with Thranduil. She had to drive because he couldn't see out of his two black eyes.