The next time I was let out of the Pokeball, we were outside and the sky was darkening. While inside the ball, I had fallen into the state roughly analogous to "sleep", so I had no idea what time it was. It could have been another day for all I would have known. We were standing on the opposite side of the school from the field where recess was held. This side of the building was windowless, and only a narrow stretch of grass separated the school's brick walls from the dark expanse of trees that marked the Silverspring Wood. Nobody else was to be seen.

I looked around for Josh, who presumably had been the one to release me from my ball. He was standing next to me, smiling. I could tell the smile was intended to be friendly, but there was something phony and forced about it-- like it was a thin veneer over a deeper layer of something else. Maybe sadness. No, it was definitely not sadness. Anger. That was it. Anger and frustration. I shifted my feet uneasily. I knew why he was angry, and I could even understand that he might be trying to hide it, but why had be brought me here?

"Ponyta," he began, patting me on the neck, "I know you probably want to use Fire attacks as much as I need you to use them. You don't want to be embarrassed in front of your fellow Pokemon. I want to be a Pokemon Master, and I can't do that with a Pokemon that can't use the proper attacks. We're both in this together, so I think we should work with each other to try and improve your skills, and try and make it so you can learn the attacks that you should be able to use. What do you say to that?"

"Pony," I said, nodding my head a bit for emphasis. Josh hadn't bothered to learn Ponyta-speak, or any Pokemon languages for that matter, so communicating with him was largely a matter of body language. And on top of that difficulty, I had to be very clear, or he would often merely interpret my efforts at communication in whatever way he wanted to. Humans can be so dense sometimes. At least I had learned to incorporate the unnatural motions of nodding and shaking one's head into my body motions.

Even though I had tentatively agreed to whatever he had in mind, I still wasn't completely certain. It seemed good that he wanted to work with me, but I couldn't forget the fact that he seemed distinctly angry. I had seen Josh's anger before, when it built up inside him and made him lash out-at his younger siblings, at other Pokemon, even at his parents from time to time. Josh got angry very quickly when he perceived other people as getting in the way of things that he wanted. Josh was a star student at his school and well behaved the rest of the time, though, so nobody ever said very much about it.

And he had every right to be angry with me. I had to keep reminding myself of that. I was the one at fault, not him or anybody else.

"Okay, Ponyta!" He stepped back and grinned broadly. "Let's see you give me a good Tackle!"

Tackle! That was easy; I could do that. I had done it many times to Pidgeys and Rattatas, back in the happy days before I was expected to know any Fire attacks. It's harder practicing physical attacks without a live opponent, or at least an extremely realistic dummy, but I managed to do a fair approximation. Josh looked pleased, although even that seemed forced.

"Good girl, Ponyta. Now do Stomp!"

Stomp was easier. The attack is basically what it sounds like and can be done standing still or from a running start, as needed. My diamond-sharp hooves bit into the hard ground and threw up clods of dirt. It felt good being asked to do attacks that I could perform, perform well even. Why couldn't he have asked me to Stomp that Bellsprout? I thought. He knew I didn't have Fire attacks, or suspected at least. So much could have been avoided...

"Great job! Good girl!" He was forcing a smile, and obviously trying to build up my confidence by using Normal attacks that he knew I could do. "Now let's try something a little bit harder... like Ember!"

This was it. I closed my eyes and reached deep down inside myself. It's hard to explain what goes through you when you try to use a non-physical attack. It's like there's this part of your brain that just knows what you're supposed to do. You call on that part, prod it with a sharp stick and tell it to do its thing, and suddenly there's fire shooting out of your mouth or whatever.

But in my case, there was...

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

It's equally hard to describe what happens when you try to use an attack and it's not there. It's worse when it's something that you think should be there, because you've over-committed yourself and there's nothing there to balance you. It's like grasping for something and missing. No, actually, it's like being a trapeze artist sailing through the air, reaching out for something to grab onto and then missing. Imagine that. Now imagine that there's no net.

The problem wasn't that I couldn't use the Fire attacks. The problem was that I had never learned them in the first place. Every other Ponyta in the world learned Ember at level 13. I had not.

Josh's grin slowly faded into an expression of disbelief, which quickly morphed into a scowl. "Ponyta, are you sure you're trying your very hardest?"

"Pony...ta," I managed, nodding my head weakly.

His jaw set. "Well, we'll just have to see what we can do about that, won't we. Perhaps you just haven't learned the attacks yet."

If you had bothered to try communicating with me, I could have told you that long ago, I thought quietly.

"It's possible you're just a freak or something. But I have something here that will fix that." He smiled, shrugged off his backpack, and kneeled to open it. After a few moments of rummaging around inside, he extracted an object that I recognized after a few moments. It was a TM- one of those mysterious devices that is used to teach Pokemon new attacks. The number 38 was clearly visible on the label.

"Fire Blast. Not the most basic Fire attack, but I'm told any Ponyta can learn it via TM, regardless of level." As if trying to be sure, he activated the TM's automated compatibility scanner and nodded in satisfaction when the word ABLE blinked green a few seconds later. "There? See. It'll work fine on you."

How does that work? I wondered. Does it somehow scan my neural system and determine that I am capable of using the attack? Can it discern my previous difficulties with Fire moves? Or does it just determine that I'm a Ponyta and assume the rest?

"C'mon, now. This won't hurt." Josh activated the TM and slowly moved it up to my flesh.

I felt a mild electric field radiating off the device. I shifted uneasily and pawed at the ground, backing away just a few inches.

A flash of anger crossed Josh's face, but was gone in a flash. "Now, now. Be a good girl. Just hold still for a couple of seconds..."

The TM's electrodes brushed against me. I felt a wave of energy pulsing off the point of contact and racing through my body to my brain, then suddenly dissipating. The machine went dark, its one use depleted.

He nodded, satisfied. "There. Think you can use the attack now?" It was somehow not a question.

I reached inside myself for Fire Blast. Once again, I found only void. A sense of panic gripped me as I stared at Josh, hoping against hope that he wouldn't ask me to demonstrate it right away.

"All right, girl, let's see you do it. A good Fire Blast. And be sure to aim away from the building."

What could I do? I stood there, unmoving. I didn't even try to go through the motions of the attack. What would be the point?

"Oh, now you're just being difficult. The TM said you could learn Fire Blast. We both know the TM worked on you. So don't give me this crap."

In that moment, I decided something. I decided that I wasn't going to beat myself up anymore. I've tried my very best, I thought at him. I can't do it. It's not within my power. I might be a failure, but it's no fault of my own. And if you don't understand that, then there's nothing more I can do about it.

Josh's eyes blazed. "Fine, then, if that's the way you want it," he said, his voice growing dangerous. "If you refuse to use Fire attacks-- attacks that I know you know-- then you will be punished."

Punished? I thought, terror filling me. The terror grew deeper as Josh reached into his backpack and came out holding a long whip. The thought that Josh might physically harm me had crossed my mind, but I had never given it any serious weight before this moment. I looked around frantically for anyone who might see our confrontation and intervene. Nobody was nearby; the sky was rapidly darkening and most of the students were inside. The few students who trained after dark usually kept to the courtyard on the other side of the main building.

"One last chance, you stupid horse," Josh said through gritted teeth. The anger was clear on his face. He saw me as an obstacle to his rise to glory, one that must be dealt with at any cost. After all, what trainer could hope to achieve greatness with a defective Pokemon?

I wanted to run, but fear paralyzed my muscles and rooted me to the ground. I tried to make a sound, something, anything to call for help, but I failed.

Josh struck.

I screamed as molten fire blossomed along my back, jolting me out of my paralysis. If I had thought the Bellsprout's vines had hurt, my scale of pain was in for a rude awakening. Anger welled up inside me. How could he do this to me?

As he drew the whip back for another strike, I reared backwards and pawed the air. One of my hooves brushed against his chest, knocking him backwards. As he fell heavily to the ground and lay there trying to catch his breath, I wondered frantically what to do next. Who could I turn to for help? Should I just run? Where could I go where he wouldn't find?

Josh had recovered enough to start hurling a blistering barrage of expletives in my direction. As he began to struggle to his feet again, I decided that escape was probably the best option currently available. I took off running.

"Come back here, you little-" Josh started after me, still cursing. He obviously didn't have any hope of keeping up, certainly not still recovering from having the wind knocked out of him, but the very fact that he was chasing me at all frightened me and made me run faster still.

My path took me along the sides of the building and led me towards the courtyard with the practice arena. There were other trainers there-- trainers who cared about their Pokemon. If I could get one of them to see how Josh was treating me, maybe they would protect me. It was the only hope I had left.

I rounded the corner of the building and burst out into the courtyard. There were three student trainers there, all female, apparently giving their Pokemon a break from battle. The instructor was talking with them about something. As I skidded to a stop, they all turned to face me, their startled expressions turning to puzzlement as they realized that my trainer was nowhere to be seen.

((Help! Help!)) I yelled at them. ((Do any of you understand Ponyta? You've got to help me!))

The girls looked at the instructor, whose brow furrowed in concentration. After a moment, though, he shook his head slowly. "I only know a few words of Ponyta," he said, more to them than to me. "I'm a Rock trainer by trade. We'll have to get her trainer to tell her what she's trying to say."

NO! I turned to the girls' Pokemon. ((You guys understand me, right? You've got to tell them what I'm saying! Josh tried to hurt me!))

One of the Pokemon, a Clefairy, had been playing with a shiny pebble it had picked up somewhere, and appeared to be too engrossed in this activity to even acknowledge my words. The other two Pokemon, a Quilava and a Charmeleon, heard me but didn't say anything. They didn't even move.

((What are you waiting for?))

The Quilava slowly blinked and looked and looked at the Charmeleon. It was then that I realized I had seen him before. He was, in fact, the same Charmeleon who had taunted me during recess earlier that day.

Crap.

The Charmeleon smiled, showing his teeth. It was not a pleasant expression by any means.

At that moment, everybody's attention was diverted by a hoarse shout from the edge of the arena. I turned my head to see Josh, no longer holding his whip, the front of his shirt stained with sweat and a tiny amount of blood surrounding the gashes where my hooves had torn the cloth.

"Get her!" he screamed, stabbing a finger in my direction. "She tried to kill me!"

Since it was obvious that the situation had progressed beyond the point where a logical discussion was possible, I did the only reasonable thing. I bolted.

In the corner of my eye, I saw the instructor grab a small round object from his belt and hurl it at me. It had to be a Pokeball. He might as well have saved the ball-- throwing a Pokeball at a healthy Pokemon that doesn't want to be caught is pretty much futile. Even a Great Ball probably wouldn't have done much to me in my current state.

It was only as the ball's energies began to reach out to me that I realized this ball was different. I tried to guard myself against it, but it was impossible. The power of this ball was immense, and it utterly overwhelmed any resistance I tried to offer it. My physical form slipped away and the world faded from view.

Darkness fell.