My new home turned out to be, as I had been told, a farm several minutes from the town. At least, it had probably once been a farm. Now all that was left was the house and a small plot of land. The neighboring fields were separated from the house by property fences, and it was obvious that they belonged to others. I wondered how the girl's parents made their living.

Her father was standing in front of the house as we approached. As he saw me, he gave a start, and it didn't seem like he was too happy at my presence. I knew there were some parents who didn't approve of an excessive interest in Pokemon, and I hoped that the parents wouldn't resent my presence. Fortunately, her mother had seemed quite amiable on the way home, and had even mentioned how it would be nice to have a Pokemon around the house again. The girl, whose name I had learned was Courtney, couldn't have been happier. "We're going to do everything together," she had been telling me. "You can help me work around the house, and then we'll go for rides in the woods. And don't worry, I'll take good care of you. I've had horses before."

I felt very good. It was obvious that she didn't care in the slightest whether or not I could use Fire techniques. The subject had not even come up once. Things seemed to be shaping up very well for me.

I thought about Ashley and her trainer. After we parted ways, they had gone on to Silverspring, their initial destination. I had no idea where they planned to go after that. Thinking about it, I realized I knew very little about them. It was obvious he was a career trainer, but I didn't know what their eventual goal was, or for that matter their immediate plans. Tentacruel Bay and Silverspring weren't on any of the main circuits that aspiring Trainers typically used.

I snapped my attention back to the present. We had drawn up to the house, and the father was regarding me critically. "So this is the new Pokemon," he said. "You didn't tell me when you left that you were planning on bringing a Ponyta back with you."

"We didn't know, Dad," said Courtney. "We only learned about her when we got to town. She broke her leg in an accident. A trainer found her and brought her in to the Pokemon Center, and when we ran into him, he asked us if we'd like to adopt her."

"Huh." He didn't look thrilled. "Has it occurred to you that she probably has an owner already? Ponyta aren't native to this area. Perhaps she got lost. Or maybe she was stolen. Have you heard about that Ponyta that's been reported missing from Silverspring?"

Courtney gave her father a reproachful look. "Daddy, I'm surprised at you. Didn't you hear? They called off the search for that Pokemon this morning. They must have found her."

He frowned. "Hmm. I still don't like it. It all seems a bit too convenient for me. What about this trainer-"

"Dear," interrupted Courtney's mother, "do you think I could talk with you in private for a moment?"

"Not now-"

"Pat," said the mother a bit more firmly, "I really think we should go inside and discuss in private."

The old man threw up his hands in a gesture of exasperation, but he turned and walked inside, the mother following close behind him.

Courtney turned to me and smiled. "There they go. Don't worry, everything will be all right. Daddy has a tendency to be difficult sometimes, but Mom can keep him under control. Would you like me to show you around?"

I nodded.

***

Life in the home turned out to be just like Courtney said. The father didn't seem to have any great love for me, but by the same token, he harbored no animosity towards me either. He spent most of the day in his study doing various kinds of work. I got the impression from Courtney that he was a businessman of some sort, who had made a fair amount of money and now conducted most of his work via electronic means. She loved it because it allowed them to live out in the country. I had to agree with her on that subject.

The mother, on the other hand, seemed friendly enough. She was always nice to me and Courtney, but sometimes she would adopt a patronizing attitude that annoyed me to no end. She didn't always seem to take Courtney's feelings and interests as seriously as she should have, and I could tell that this angered Courtney. I could sympathize; I knew what it was like to be treated less than seriously due to age or some other factor.

For Courtney's part, she made good on her promise to spend time with me every day. She hardly left my side from sunrise until sundown, except to go inside for meals and the like. The side of the road opposite the house was a dense forest, crisscrossed with a maze of old trails, and we followed them until I knew them by heart. In all that time, the issue of Pokemon battles never once came up. We would see other Pokemon in the wild, and occasionally one of them would be bold enough to approach and introduce themselves to me, but combat never entered the equation. After living much of my life with Josh, whose sole ambition was to become a Pokemon Master, the change in emphasis was refreshing.

It was the perfect existence. Or it should have been. But something was missing.

It took me a long time to figure out what that something was. But at last it came to me. I missed battle. Or rather, I missed the concept of battle. While my experiences in the arena had been less than positive, that was not to say that I had not spent my youth dreaming about traveling the world with my trainer, defeating other opponents in battle. In my dreams, my trainer was always good and kind and put the feelings of his Pokemon ahead of everything else, just like the ones I had seen in movies. I had spent a long time waiting for Josh to become that trainer, to no avail.

I wanted to battle. I realized that much now. Unfortunately, the truth was that was simply not an option. Even if Courtney wanted to go on the road to become a trainer, even if she could be convinced to accept my limitations (which I could almost imagine her doing), it was impossible that I could be expected to avoid Fire attacks indefinitely. Sooner or later, people would start to wonder.

It was possible that the majority of humans would not care one way or another. The only humans who had any idea of my problem were Josh, who saw it as an obstacle I had created for him, and the other children at the school, who saw it as an opportunity to tease Josh. Josh wasn't very well-liked at the school, for obvious reasons. But even if humans were to be indifferent, the fact remained that most Pokemon would look down on me and exclude me from their society. I didn't want that to happen, any more than it already had. I had almost managed to forget the scorn and derision-- indeed, in some cases, the outright hatred-- I had faced at the hands of the Fire Pokemon at the school. I had no desire to dredge it up again.

Worse-- what if I ran into Josh? Or into one of the Pokemon who had mistreated me at the school? I could still remember the malicious smile of that Charmeleon. I saw it in my nightmares. He hated me, I was sure of that. He was one of those individuals who need someone to hate in order to feel better about themselves, and he had fixated on me. I wondered if he still thought about me, or if I had passed out of his mind as soon as I left the school. Either way, I was definitely not eager to cross paths with him again.

Courtney had begun to pick up a fair amount of Ponyta-speak from the time we spent together. I was pleased by her quick learning, even considering the fact that she already knew the similar Rapidash language. After a matter of weeks, her knowledge had progressed to the point where we would have long conversations on our rides. I contemplated telling her about my problem. Just to be able to share it freely with someone else would have felt so good. Whenever I began to work up to it, though, fear of what might happen drove me to silence.

In the end, I simply gulped it down and made up my mind not to tell anybody. It's your own business, I told myself, and you have no right to inflict it on anybody else.

That was the end of that particular line of thought, at least for a while. It always lingered on the edge of my mind, but I could suppress it with a conscious effort.

Another feeling began to emerge. This one was much harder to pinpoint. It was in fact impossible, or nearly so, and after several days of trying to figure out what it was that was nagging at me, I gave up. It was a constant sort of tension that built up inside me. Sometimes my skin tingled and every hair on my body seemed to stand on end. Afterwards, the feeling would subside for some time, a period ranging from hours to days. It was a disconcerting feeling.

Courtney could tell something wasn't quite right. She started to worry about me and continually asked me if I was feeling okay. I assured her that I was fine. Which I might be, for all I knew-- I honestly had no idea what the matter was, which was part of the reason why I was reluctant to discuss it. But I couldn't figure out what was wrong, and she knew even less than I did, which I could tell frustrated her.

I decided that, no matter what, I needed to talk to somebody. And I didn't want that somebody to be someone close to me, someone that I had to see every day. Someone like that might be able to hurt me if they wanted to, and I didn't feel like I could trust anyone that much-not even Courtney. Given this, there was only one person I could think of. When we returned to the house one evening, I asked Courtney if she still had the phone number for Ashley's trainer.

"Of course," she answered. "I know how much you liked that Vulpix. Do you want to give them a call?"

((Yes,)) I answered. ((Can we do it tonight?))

"Of course. As soon as we get home, I'll go inside and get the phone."

There was one other thing. ((I... kind of need to talk to her by myself. I hope you don't mind.))

Courtney was silent for a moment. "I understand. And no, I don't mind. I'll dial the number for you, then I'll go somewhere else and the two of you can talk in private. How's that?"

I thought that sounded fine, and told her so.

"You know you can talk to me about anything you want, Ponyta. You don't have to keep things to yourself."

I didn't say anything to that, and she didn't press the matter further. We rode the rest of the way home in silence.

***

Courtney was as good as her word. As soon as we got home and I got settled in, she dashed into the house and emerged a few minutes later with the cordless phone.

"Sorry," she apologized as she showed me the handset. "We only have one speakerphone, and it isn't very portable, but this should do well enough. Will it be all right if I just set it on the stall railing?"

((That will be fine,)) I said. ((Do you have the number?))

"Right here." She extracted a piece of paper from her pocket, read down it to find the number, and dialed. "All right. I'll leave now. If you need something, just call for me." She set it down, then turned and walked away.

I was left alone with the phone, which was now ringing. For a moment panic gripped me. There was still time to back out of this.

Somebody answered the phone. "Hello?"

It was Ashley's trainer. I recognized his voice. ((Hello. It's me, Ponyta.))

"Ponyta!" he exclaimed. "It's you! No, I still can't speak your language, sorry. Let me put Ashley on the line, okay?"

I waited. I could hear a muffled conversation on the other end of the line, then Ashley's voice coming through. ((Ponyta! Where are you? How are you? Are you doing all right?))

((I'm fine,)) I managed.

((Are you getting along okay with Courtney?)) Ashley asked.

((Courtney's very nice,)) I said. Sigh. ((Ashley, there's something I need to tell you.))

((What's that?)) she asked. Her voice went from excited to hesitant and touched with concern.

((Is your trainer there? Can he hear what I'm saying?))

"Yes, I am," I heard him answer. "But if you need to talk alone, say the word, and I'm gone."

((Ashley, could you ask him to leave?))

There was a brief pause as Ashley talked with her trainer, then I heard her voice again. ((Okay, he's out of earshot now. What is it you need to tell me?))

((You have to promise me you won't hate me after I tell you this.))

There was a pause on the other end. ((Ponyta, you're starting to scare me.))

((I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that.))

I could hear her taking a deep breath. ((It's all right. Now, don't worry. Just tell me what's wrong.))

I wet my lips nervously. ((Tell me. Have you ever heard of a Pokemon who... who...))

((Who what?))

((Who... couldn't learn... the attacks they were supposed to?)) Somehow it seemed less daunting, putting it in those terms and presenting it as a hypothetical situation.

There was another long pause. I could tell Ashley was thinking. ((Well,)) she said, ((I met a Voltorb once who didn't learn Sonicboom until Level 19-))

((That's not what I'm talking about,)) I interrupted. ((I mean a Pokemon who couldn't learn attacks-- or a whole type of attacks-- at all.))

Another pause, heavier this time. ((No, I've never heard of anything like that,)) she said.

((That's my problem,)) I blurted out. ((I can't use Fire attacks. I can't even learn them.))

((You can't?)) She did not sound disgusted, or shocked, or any of the other emotions I'd encountered from Pokemon who knew of my dark secret. If anything, she sounded a little puzzled. ((You mean you've never been able to?))

((No. Never.)) My heart was still pounding, but at least the hard part was over. Whatever happened now couldn't possibly be as difficult as that.

((I... see.)) She still sounded a bit confused. ((Is that all?))

((What do you mean, is that all?))

((Well, you made it sound like such a big-)) She cut herself off in mid-sentence. ((I mean, I know it must be a big deal to you, but you sounded as though you thought I would hate you for it or something. Why on earth would you think that?))

((I don't know.)) I had just assumed that it was a possibility. ((Every other Pokemon I've ever met who's known about it has reacted that way.))

((Maybe I'm different than they are.))

((Yes, you are.)) I couldn't control myself anymore. Tears welled up in my eyes. ((Thank you, Ashley. You're such a good friend to me.))

((Of course. Don't mention it. But, Ponyta, tell me more. You can't learn any Fire attacks at all?))

((No.))

((Why not? I hope I don't sound like an idiot for asking that question.))

((You don't,)) I assured her. ((I don't know that myself. If I could find out why, half my problems would be solved. The best I can figure out is that I'm simply... different. Defective.))

((Don't use that word. You're not defective. Well, maybe in the literal sense of the word, but it's nothing to be ashamed of.))

((Nobody else believes that. I'm not even sure I do myself.))

Ashley sighed. ((You shouldn't talk that way.))

((I'll decide how I should and shouldn't talk about myself,)) I told her.

The silence that followed my statement was longer than usual. When Ashley spoke again, her voice was different. ((Hold on. Don't say anything. He's waving to me. I think he has something to say.))

I could hear the phone being picked up off the ground, then the trainer's voice came through. "Hey, Ponyta, I'm real sorry, but my phone's almost out of battery power. We're staying at a motel tonight. I'll recharge the batteries there and we can call you back, okay?"

((All right,)) I told him, even though I knew he couldn't understand me.

"Great to hear from you, girl. I'll have to get Ashley to tell me what's new with you. Don't worry-- I won't ask her to tell me any secrets. Talk to you later. Bye."

((Don't worry, Ponyta,)) I heard Ashley say. ((Everything will be all right. We'll talk soon.))

Click.

I sighed, but it was not a sigh of tiredness or despair as it had been in the past. I felt as though a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. There might still have been some weight there, but a large part of it was gone. At long last, I had found someone I could openly discuss things with. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world.

((Courtney?)) I called.

After a few moments, the girl appeared at the door to the barn and walked up to me. "Are you done? How did it go? Did you have a nice conversation?"

((Yes,)) I said. ((Very nice.))

"Well, that's good," she said, smiling. "You look happier than you did a little while ago. Did talking to Ashley cheer you up?"

I nodded.

"Are you sure there's nothing you want to talk to me about?"

I hesitated. The words were on the tip of my tongue, but after a period of several seconds, I shook my head.

"Okay, then. I believe you." She hugged me around the neck. "I love you, Ponyta. Goodnight. Sleep well."

She picked up the phone and walked away. I stood there in the darkness for a long time, thinking about nothing in particular. Eventually, I drifted off to sleep.