Disclaimer: Remus Lupin and Sirius Black are the property of JK Rowling, WB and several publishers, anyway – they're not mine! I make no profit of this, well maybe the slightest (since I have an English exam tomorrow and I needed to practice my writing) but there's no financial profit…

A/N: I was challenged by my best friend whether I could or could not write a romantic connection between Remus and Sirius, I said I can though how wonderful this ship won't be (and it's one of the best ever, it has huge potential) I can't see JK Rowling actually writing it in Harry Potter. So here is my attempt, please r&r.

Dear lover,

Funny, I couldn't make myself write anything else, after all the kinky names I called you, ruining both your name and your marauding nickname, I can't write either of them. I thought of calling you friend, but you aren't my friend any more, are you? Not after what you did. I think you've finally done something I can't forgive, and I thought that after fifth year there couldn't be such a thing. Apparently I was wrong, more than I thought it was possible. But you're still my lover, no matter how deeply I'll loathe or resent you, I will never be able to let go of my love to you, you were my first everything.

I want to forget you, lover. Forget all I had with you, all the moments we shared, after all, they couldn't be true, could they? No, it couldn't, maybe you did love me, or at least thought you did, but it wasn't enough. It's hard to be mated to a werewolf, lover, I know you've suffered. I know you tried to reduce my torture, and I'm thankful. But I will try and forget it, you see, lover, I can't live the way I do now, can't stand the memories that crawl from every corner. I'll leave Britain, go somewhere else, maybe live among muggles for a while. I'll build a new life, one, which you will not be a part of. Maybe I'll find someone else, lover, if my heart survives what you did to it.

You always loved the letters I wrote, haven't you? I used to write such shameful things while we were apart, and then do them to you when we met. I'll miss you, lover, you're hands on my body, in my hair, making me ache with desire. You're eyes, burning with lust at me, passionate kisses whenever we had the chance to steal a few. Long nights of love making; your body pressed to mine, our souls becoming one forever. And it is forever, lover, you are my mate, you'll always be there, but I will forget you.

I'm writing this letter because I can't tell you goodbye any other way, and I want a closure, lover, I need it. I wanted to come and see you for the last time, without ministry officers around, but they won't let werewolves into Azkaban, especially if it's an educated werewolf whose been lover to the most guarded convict there. Dumbledore said I shouldn't see you in there anyway, so I guess it's for the best they won't let me in. Dumbledore also said he'll give you this letter, I think he understands how important it is to me. He suggested I'll stay in Britain, maybe even get a job in Hogwarts, but I couldn't stand to be another minute in a place that symbolized us. That reminded me of you.

I probably won't see you ever again, lover, nor will I think of you. But you should know, lover, you were a part of the man I tried to be, you were my heart and soul, and now when you're gone I need to find new ones. James once said that in the end each of us would walk in different paths, no matter how strong we were connected. I knew he was right even then, I just never imagined the end would come so fast.

I loved you, and I forever will, but I will not forgive you, my star. You were the brightest of us, in many ways, now I will have to live without your shine. Forget me, lover, if you haven't already, I hope I can forget you.

Yours,

Remus J. Lupin.