A.N.: Thanks a bunch to all you Irkens and Humans (possibly even some
Muggles, Witches, and Wizards out there too?) who reviewed to such a short
chapter that hardly explains anything! And I really mean THANK YOU, because
there were a few…*a-hem*…other terms to the bet that will not be mentioned
until the end of this fic (*mumbles* if I can think of an ending) so we
keep everything fair and square! Yes…uh…fair…I know, I'm loosing my evil
touch…fluffy should know that if she reviews in here…oh well. And just to
tell those who think Zim is going to actually become a wizard in this fic:
he pretends to be a human, why can't he pretend to be a wizard? And come
on! Zim?! Gryffindor?! I really don't think so, but you'll just have to
wait and see in future chapters! Heck, even I don't know!
---
The next day, Zim leaned back in his comfortable, crescent-moon shaped red chair in front of a large computer screen; proudly looking over the report for his mission he had just finished typing. The normal day at Skool had gone by slowly, so he was glad he was still able to get the monthly report in to his Irken rulers, the Almighty Tallest, on time for once.
The day had gone like this: his rival, Dib, had made some big scene about humans being more intelligent then…whatever Zim was…in front of the whole class because he had gotten 0.3% more credit then Zim on a Math quiz. This had forced Zim to shove Dib in his locker between classes, which made Dib returned the favor during lunch by pushing Zim's face into his food tray, which Zim got his revenge on by placing an Irken bomb in Dib's backpack that Dib still didn't know was there. When he did find it though, it would just make his backpack explode. No permanent damage, unfortunately for Zim, but at least he would get the last laugh when Dib came to Skool the next week with a backpack reduced to ashes.
Zim chuckled darkly to himself at this thought. But enough of that, he still had work to do. Lately he had been looking at the different 'countries' throughout this planet, gathering every bit of possible information about them. It would take him forever to look up all the countries on the Earth though, so he simply looked up the big ones like China and Brazil, or the ones that claimed to have superior power like the Untied States of America and Russia, and the ones that have been on the news lately like Afghanistan, Israel, and Palestine. Today, Zim was reading some things on the geography of a rather small country in Europe that seemed to have either superior power or great political respect from other countries. This place was called 'England.'
"Computer, run a scan on this part of the landscape. I'd like to see a few photographs of it as well," Zim ordered, pointing his gloved finger along a random stretch of land on a touch screen that held a map of England. Expecting an immediate response from the computer, the Irken twitched his antenna in annoyance when nothing happened.
"Computer? What's going on?" he barked that the machine, red eyes narrowed in suspicion.
"Processing," was its only response.
A few awkward minutes passed. "Strange…this is certainly strange…" Zim thought aloud, "It's either a glitch in the computer or something…something to do with the land it's scanning."
Zim was beginning to grow very impatient when the computer suddenly announced, "Landscape access blocked by unknown force. Photographing access blocked by same unknown force."
"Unknown force?!" the Irken thundered. He stood on his chair to make him seem taller and furiously shook his fist at the screen. "I'll show you force! Computer, use power chip and try to break through this stupid force!"
"Uh…are you sure you want to use a power chip Master?" the computer asked with a confused tone in its deep metallic voice, "I mean…those things are expensive and it doesn't seem like the Tallest are going to send you any kind of weaponry any time soon-"
"Do not question my actions, and just use it!" the small Irken ordered and sat back down with his arms folded while he waited, angrily thinking about this 'unknown force.' There must be something unique about this land. Unknown force…that sounded so familiar…it reminded him of something, but in his impatience with the computer, he couldn't quite place it.
"Okay, I managed to send a few camera devices to the requested area," the computer finally announced, "But be quick, because I sense them malfunctioning under the same force." Zim's three-fingered Irken hands flew over the keyboard as he typed a few passwords into the computer before the screen flickered to a strange and shocking picture. The alien's eyes practically popped out as he fought hard to keep his jaw from hitting the floor when he saw what was there. At the strange sight, which his computer screen was now holding, only one human phrase came to the befuddled Irken's mind…
"Oh my god…"
The largest stone castle Zim (or any Irken for that matter) had ever seen sat perched on top of a rocky ledge surrounded by water. Behind it lay a rich green forest, so beautiful that he could almost smell the fragrant pine trees. On a bridge connecting the castle to land, he could make out several human children dressed in fancy black robes, who were playing and laughing together; in their hands they each held a short wooden stick. The image of the strange land suddenly began to fuzz in and out of focus, for the cameras were beginning to fall apart completely. Zim strained his red eyes to see this magical place as best he could until the screen fell completely dark.
Zim flopped back into his chair, his face expressionless, for he was still not over the shock from what had just seen. Whatever that place was the people there certainly didn't want anyone with technology like his poking around. The Irken's ruby eyes widened impossibly once more when he realized what this had reminded him of.
His conversation with Gir last night. Out on the roof. He had said Earth had no secrets, or at least not very many. Not like Irk…or could it?
"So…" Zim mused to himself, a slight smirk spreading across his paled face as his voice became cunning and silky. "Looks like you have your share of secrets as well…don't you Earth?"
---
The next day, Zim leaned back in his comfortable, crescent-moon shaped red chair in front of a large computer screen; proudly looking over the report for his mission he had just finished typing. The normal day at Skool had gone by slowly, so he was glad he was still able to get the monthly report in to his Irken rulers, the Almighty Tallest, on time for once.
The day had gone like this: his rival, Dib, had made some big scene about humans being more intelligent then…whatever Zim was…in front of the whole class because he had gotten 0.3% more credit then Zim on a Math quiz. This had forced Zim to shove Dib in his locker between classes, which made Dib returned the favor during lunch by pushing Zim's face into his food tray, which Zim got his revenge on by placing an Irken bomb in Dib's backpack that Dib still didn't know was there. When he did find it though, it would just make his backpack explode. No permanent damage, unfortunately for Zim, but at least he would get the last laugh when Dib came to Skool the next week with a backpack reduced to ashes.
Zim chuckled darkly to himself at this thought. But enough of that, he still had work to do. Lately he had been looking at the different 'countries' throughout this planet, gathering every bit of possible information about them. It would take him forever to look up all the countries on the Earth though, so he simply looked up the big ones like China and Brazil, or the ones that claimed to have superior power like the Untied States of America and Russia, and the ones that have been on the news lately like Afghanistan, Israel, and Palestine. Today, Zim was reading some things on the geography of a rather small country in Europe that seemed to have either superior power or great political respect from other countries. This place was called 'England.'
"Computer, run a scan on this part of the landscape. I'd like to see a few photographs of it as well," Zim ordered, pointing his gloved finger along a random stretch of land on a touch screen that held a map of England. Expecting an immediate response from the computer, the Irken twitched his antenna in annoyance when nothing happened.
"Computer? What's going on?" he barked that the machine, red eyes narrowed in suspicion.
"Processing," was its only response.
A few awkward minutes passed. "Strange…this is certainly strange…" Zim thought aloud, "It's either a glitch in the computer or something…something to do with the land it's scanning."
Zim was beginning to grow very impatient when the computer suddenly announced, "Landscape access blocked by unknown force. Photographing access blocked by same unknown force."
"Unknown force?!" the Irken thundered. He stood on his chair to make him seem taller and furiously shook his fist at the screen. "I'll show you force! Computer, use power chip and try to break through this stupid force!"
"Uh…are you sure you want to use a power chip Master?" the computer asked with a confused tone in its deep metallic voice, "I mean…those things are expensive and it doesn't seem like the Tallest are going to send you any kind of weaponry any time soon-"
"Do not question my actions, and just use it!" the small Irken ordered and sat back down with his arms folded while he waited, angrily thinking about this 'unknown force.' There must be something unique about this land. Unknown force…that sounded so familiar…it reminded him of something, but in his impatience with the computer, he couldn't quite place it.
"Okay, I managed to send a few camera devices to the requested area," the computer finally announced, "But be quick, because I sense them malfunctioning under the same force." Zim's three-fingered Irken hands flew over the keyboard as he typed a few passwords into the computer before the screen flickered to a strange and shocking picture. The alien's eyes practically popped out as he fought hard to keep his jaw from hitting the floor when he saw what was there. At the strange sight, which his computer screen was now holding, only one human phrase came to the befuddled Irken's mind…
"Oh my god…"
The largest stone castle Zim (or any Irken for that matter) had ever seen sat perched on top of a rocky ledge surrounded by water. Behind it lay a rich green forest, so beautiful that he could almost smell the fragrant pine trees. On a bridge connecting the castle to land, he could make out several human children dressed in fancy black robes, who were playing and laughing together; in their hands they each held a short wooden stick. The image of the strange land suddenly began to fuzz in and out of focus, for the cameras were beginning to fall apart completely. Zim strained his red eyes to see this magical place as best he could until the screen fell completely dark.
Zim flopped back into his chair, his face expressionless, for he was still not over the shock from what had just seen. Whatever that place was the people there certainly didn't want anyone with technology like his poking around. The Irken's ruby eyes widened impossibly once more when he realized what this had reminded him of.
His conversation with Gir last night. Out on the roof. He had said Earth had no secrets, or at least not very many. Not like Irk…or could it?
"So…" Zim mused to himself, a slight smirk spreading across his paled face as his voice became cunning and silky. "Looks like you have your share of secrets as well…don't you Earth?"