Total War
by Ryan Myers
Chapter 1: Completing the Roster
"So what now Clyne?" Master Hand asked. "What did you decide without me?"
"Well," Clyne replied thoughtfully, "Not much, actually."
"I think they'll be attacking the toy dimension first, since that's the closest." Master Hand remarked. "So let's go there."
"Waita!" Mario shouted. "Weren'ta there othera people toa recruit, Clyne?"
"Oh, you're right! Let's do that now." Clyne suggested, opening a portal.
The smashers emerged onto a strange landscape whose features seemed very polygon-oriented, except for a somewhat small building not too far away.
"Mario and Peach, come with me." Clyne suggested.
"Just them?" Samus wondered. "That's no fun!"
"He's leading them into a trap!" Falco whispered to Fox. Fox rolled his eyes.
Clyne approached the building and knocked. He motioned for Peach and Mario to enter first.
They entered a room that was completely empty, except for what appeared to be a receptionist's desk. The receptionist was-
"Peach?" Mario shouted.
"What is going on?" the receptionist asked.
"Waita a minute! I knowa what'sa going on!" Mario shouted triumphantly. He walked up to the desk. "Dr. Marioa worksa here, right?"
"Why-yes-do you have an appointment?"
"We don't need one, Peach," said Peach matter-of-factly.
"Oh-of course not…I'll get him."
Peach left the room and returned moments later with a short, plump man wearing a white coat, a stethoscope, and a familiar mustache.
"Doc! It'sa great toa see you!" Mario shouted.
"Mario, whata are youa doing here?"
"Long story." Clyne replied, coming out from behind. "We need your help."
"Well, I'lla need to cancel mya appointments…"
"You don't have any, Doctor." Peach replied from the desk.
"Oha, right. OK, let'sa go!"
The four exited to greet a very confused audience.
"Mario?" Link asked.
"Yes?" the two replied in unison.
"Bowser?" Dr. Mario shouted.
"Don'ta worry, he'sa with us." Mario answered. The doctor seemed suspicious, but accepted.
Clyne rolled his eyes. "This is Dr. Mario. He'll be joining us."
"Whata does that involvea?"
"I'll tell you later."
The next stop was very familiar to one of the smashers.
"Kokiri Forest? What are we doing here?"
"This isn't the Kokiri Forest you know, Link. This is a different version of the forest. Does it look different?"
"Well, yeah…it looks like-it did before Ganondorf attacked."
"That's right." Clyne replied. "Come with me."
Walking past the very confused elves, Link soon found someone he would have never expected to see: himself.
"Who are you?" Young Link asked.
"I'm Link."
"Like heck you are! I am!"
"You both are," Clyne sighed, "From different dimensions. Young Link, we-"
"Don't call me Young Link! I'm Link! He can be Old Link."
Clyne sighed. "You're Young Link. Unless you don't want to come…"
"Who, me? Pass up an adventure? Fine, I'll be Young Link. Just this once."
Link groaned. "This is pointless. Get to the point."
"We need your help." Clyne stated. "Will you come with us?"
"Sure, I-Wait! That's Ganondorf!"
"Oh, no." Link muttered.
"He's with us." Zelda assured.
"Zelda? You look…older."
"I am," she replied, giggling. "Just like Link is."
"Whatever. Where are we going?"
"The toy dimension. You'd like it there." Master Hand replied.
"Huh?"
Clyne rolled his eyes. "I'll tell you later."
The next stop blew everyone away.
"I'm flat! What is going on?" Falcon shouted, alarmed.
Luigi laughed. "Bring backa memories, Marioa?"
"Youa bet. Ia guess thisa person never madea it intoa 3D."
"That's for sure." Clyne replied. "Everyone, meet Mr. Game & Watch."
On cue, a small black stick figure emerged from a nearby house. The smashers at the right angles could see right through it.
"Fascinating…completely 2D!" mused Ganondorf.
"Welcome to the team, um…G & W." Samus said kindly to the figure.
The figure recoiled, though, and beeped loudly.
"Hmm." Clyne sighed. "I hadn't counted on that problem."
"What's wrong with it?" DK groaned. "Make it stop!"
"Pichu!" Pichu agreed.
Clyne shouted over the beeping, "It must have never heard English before. It just communicates with beeps!"
"Well, fix it! This hurts!" Marth complained.
Mewtwo and Ness stepped forward.
"What can they do?" Bowser roared. "He couldn't have a mind or mouth!"
Everyone laughed. "We'll give it a try." Mewtwo replied.
Mewtwo and Ness focused their mental energies on the unsuspecting stick figure. The beeps became louder and louder, until they stopped suddenly.
"Did it work?" Roy groaned, uncovering his ears.
"Well…" Mewtwo turned, holding his head. "We fed him all the info we could. Whether he understood any of it or not…"
"He looks…dead." Ness remarked sadly.
Indeed, G&W was lying unmoving on the oddly two-dimensional ground.
"Mewtwo, is that possible?" Master Hand demanded.
"Well, if you'd have asked me yesterday, I'd have said no…" Mewtwo answered, confused.
Suddenly, the figure bolted upright. "Greetings, friends. My name is Mr. Game & Watch."
"Welcome to the team." Samus repeated happily.
"So now will you tell us what's going on?" Young Link asked.
"I'd love to." Master Hand replied. "It all started…"
While he's doing that, let's see what the smashers' opponents are doing.
"Sire, there's been an unexpected problem."
"Oh really? What might that be?" Anomaly turned away from his intent watching of the toy dimension.
"Well, our attack may not be as much of a surprise as we intended."
Anomaly gave his spy his full attention now. "Not a surprise? How the hell is that possible?"
"According to our informant in the Kokiri Forest, Master Hand and his friends are most likely gathering a small army to warn the toy dimension of our arrival, and to lead the counterattack."
"How do they know?"
"The group arrived in the forest and picked up a fighter, then someone said something about the toy dimension." The spy replied wryly.
"Unbelievable." Anomaly was overcome with disgust. "Those heroes would try to ruin my plans, would they? I'll show them!"
The spy cowered. He knew that once Anomaly's temper was agitated, near him was a dangerous place to be. Anomaly pounded his fist down dangerously close to the spy, and barked out orders to the armies.
"Gather all of our forces! If they think they can stop us, we'll double our size! Triple!"
"How do you propose we do that, sire?" Anomaly's second-in-command wondered.
"I don't care, think of something! Start reproducing! I'll delay the attack another week!" came the reply.
The shadows became electrified with activity, trying to increase their numbers.
"So, Master Hand, you think you can stop me? This should prove to be an interesting war." Anomaly smiled to himself, calming down. "Very interesting."