A/N: Well, here is chapter 3. There is a twist for the ending of this
chapter, so if you think I'm going completely out of character for a while,
don't worry about it ;) Thanks to those of you who give me feedback. Enjoy!
Aeryn stared in disbelief.
"Rygel" Pilot said, exasperated.
Rygel looked quite uncomfortable.
"I-uh-apologize for walking in on your conversation" he said, shifting uncomfortably in his throne sled. "I wanted to ask Pilot something, and I realized my comm wasn't working, so I came up here.
"And congratulations, Aeryn" he added sheepishly.
Aeryn finally found her voice.
"Thank you" she said biting her lip. "Rygel, you must promise-no, swear upon your life-that you won't tell anyone-especially Crichton."
Rygel nodded. "You really ought to tell Crichton, though…"
Aeryn closed her eyes in a mixture of pain and fear. Pilot looked concerned.
"What if he doesn't accept me? He will know that he is the father, but not…" Aeryn balled her hands into fists in agony, and dropped her face to look at the floor.
"Aeryn, I really don't think he'd stop loving you for that" Pilot said, putting a claw on her shoulder to comfort her.
Aeryn shook her head wildly.
"I just can't do it. No way, no how. And who says he still loves me anyway? He's probably given up by now. I had pushed him away for so long, and now everything is back at the beginning, but worse. It's ripping me apart. He won't love me the same way. How could I expect him to? He's not my John. I can't look at him without thinking about what happened on Talyn…his double's dying face…"
Tears welled up in Aeryn's eyes. She shivered in anger of being so weak and helpless, and ran out of Pilot's den.
Rygel watched as she disappeared from view. He turned to Pilot.
"She's been through so much this past cycle. How much more can she take?"
~*~
John was punching his pillow furiously. He was also cursing very heavily. Harvey was there, and he rolled his eyes.
"John, you need to focus!"
"You've said that line at least a thousand times!" he said in a half shout.
"Obviously you don't listen" he grumbled. "What you need is a little help and advice."
"No offense, Harv, but you give the worst advice on the face of the Ear-Uncharted Territories."
"Oh, let's not start this again" Harvey groaned and slumped down on a chair.
"Looks like Earth is the only thing I can think about anymore. That- and wormholes."
"And what will you do when you find Earth? Go back?" he said, giving John a quizzical look.
"I-" John started, but then realized what the neural clone was saying.
"If you go back," Harvey continued, "It will be exactly the way things happened on the false Earth. You will be stuck there like an animal. Trapped. But this time, you won't have Aeryn there with you. And how many cycles has it been now? Three? Would anyone actually believe that you are alive?"
John groaned.
"It seems to be all I've got left."
~*~
Aeryn walked into John's room. There was no need to ask.
"I need to tell you something."
"I'm listening."
Aeryn closed her eyes. He said that so coldly to her, as though he wished she weren't alive.
"John, I-I'm pregnant."
John stopped and looked at her. His eyes blazed in anger and hurt.
"Why should I care? It's not *our* child."
"Genetically, you are the father" Aeryn said, hurt by his words.
"But I didn't help make it" he said icily.
"But John, I-I love you!" she said, tears welling up in her eyes.
"How can I love you like I did when I know that that baby growing inside you isn't really mine?!"
Aeryn's heart broke and she ran from his quarters. She found herself in the transport hangar and took a transport pod. She left and didn't say good bye to anyone.
Suddenly, she was back at the ice planet from a whole cycle before, and John was chasing after her in Farscape 1.
"Aeryn, you need to get back to Moya!" he yelled desperately through his comm.
"You don't love me anymore!" Aeryn cried, tears streaming down her face.
"I was jealous, Aeryn! I'm sorry! I want you back!"
"Really?" Aeryn said, her voice cracking.
"Really."
"I'm coming back!" she yelled.
But as she turned so quickly, she hit Farscape 1…hard. It started to spin out of control.
"John! You need to eject!" Aeryn screamed. A flash of everyone yelling at her to eject a cycle ago came back to her.
John ejected. He tried to get out of chair, but it was stuck. He was over a frozen lake.
"I can't get out!" John screamed.
Another flash. Aeryn was struggling with the belt that held her, but the mechanism was damaged. Her heart was beating rapidly.
"You can't die like this! Not again!" Aeryn cried out.
"Aeryn, baby, I love you!"
"I love you too!"
The flashes were almost confusing now. John crashed into the lake, and his voice was gone. The flashes stopped, but one appeared, steady and true. John's face was full of tears, and his eyes were puffy, full of shock.
"Oh, God" he gasped in fear. "What have I done?"
"Oh, God" Aeryn gasped in shock. "What have I done?"
She screamed in agony. She woke with a start, and her heart beat rapidly. She realized that she was still screaming.
Please Review. Am I still staying in character? Let me know…
Aeryn stared in disbelief.
"Rygel" Pilot said, exasperated.
Rygel looked quite uncomfortable.
"I-uh-apologize for walking in on your conversation" he said, shifting uncomfortably in his throne sled. "I wanted to ask Pilot something, and I realized my comm wasn't working, so I came up here.
"And congratulations, Aeryn" he added sheepishly.
Aeryn finally found her voice.
"Thank you" she said biting her lip. "Rygel, you must promise-no, swear upon your life-that you won't tell anyone-especially Crichton."
Rygel nodded. "You really ought to tell Crichton, though…"
Aeryn closed her eyes in a mixture of pain and fear. Pilot looked concerned.
"What if he doesn't accept me? He will know that he is the father, but not…" Aeryn balled her hands into fists in agony, and dropped her face to look at the floor.
"Aeryn, I really don't think he'd stop loving you for that" Pilot said, putting a claw on her shoulder to comfort her.
Aeryn shook her head wildly.
"I just can't do it. No way, no how. And who says he still loves me anyway? He's probably given up by now. I had pushed him away for so long, and now everything is back at the beginning, but worse. It's ripping me apart. He won't love me the same way. How could I expect him to? He's not my John. I can't look at him without thinking about what happened on Talyn…his double's dying face…"
Tears welled up in Aeryn's eyes. She shivered in anger of being so weak and helpless, and ran out of Pilot's den.
Rygel watched as she disappeared from view. He turned to Pilot.
"She's been through so much this past cycle. How much more can she take?"
~*~
John was punching his pillow furiously. He was also cursing very heavily. Harvey was there, and he rolled his eyes.
"John, you need to focus!"
"You've said that line at least a thousand times!" he said in a half shout.
"Obviously you don't listen" he grumbled. "What you need is a little help and advice."
"No offense, Harv, but you give the worst advice on the face of the Ear-Uncharted Territories."
"Oh, let's not start this again" Harvey groaned and slumped down on a chair.
"Looks like Earth is the only thing I can think about anymore. That- and wormholes."
"And what will you do when you find Earth? Go back?" he said, giving John a quizzical look.
"I-" John started, but then realized what the neural clone was saying.
"If you go back," Harvey continued, "It will be exactly the way things happened on the false Earth. You will be stuck there like an animal. Trapped. But this time, you won't have Aeryn there with you. And how many cycles has it been now? Three? Would anyone actually believe that you are alive?"
John groaned.
"It seems to be all I've got left."
~*~
Aeryn walked into John's room. There was no need to ask.
"I need to tell you something."
"I'm listening."
Aeryn closed her eyes. He said that so coldly to her, as though he wished she weren't alive.
"John, I-I'm pregnant."
John stopped and looked at her. His eyes blazed in anger and hurt.
"Why should I care? It's not *our* child."
"Genetically, you are the father" Aeryn said, hurt by his words.
"But I didn't help make it" he said icily.
"But John, I-I love you!" she said, tears welling up in her eyes.
"How can I love you like I did when I know that that baby growing inside you isn't really mine?!"
Aeryn's heart broke and she ran from his quarters. She found herself in the transport hangar and took a transport pod. She left and didn't say good bye to anyone.
Suddenly, she was back at the ice planet from a whole cycle before, and John was chasing after her in Farscape 1.
"Aeryn, you need to get back to Moya!" he yelled desperately through his comm.
"You don't love me anymore!" Aeryn cried, tears streaming down her face.
"I was jealous, Aeryn! I'm sorry! I want you back!"
"Really?" Aeryn said, her voice cracking.
"Really."
"I'm coming back!" she yelled.
But as she turned so quickly, she hit Farscape 1…hard. It started to spin out of control.
"John! You need to eject!" Aeryn screamed. A flash of everyone yelling at her to eject a cycle ago came back to her.
John ejected. He tried to get out of chair, but it was stuck. He was over a frozen lake.
"I can't get out!" John screamed.
Another flash. Aeryn was struggling with the belt that held her, but the mechanism was damaged. Her heart was beating rapidly.
"You can't die like this! Not again!" Aeryn cried out.
"Aeryn, baby, I love you!"
"I love you too!"
The flashes were almost confusing now. John crashed into the lake, and his voice was gone. The flashes stopped, but one appeared, steady and true. John's face was full of tears, and his eyes were puffy, full of shock.
"Oh, God" he gasped in fear. "What have I done?"
"Oh, God" Aeryn gasped in shock. "What have I done?"
She screamed in agony. She woke with a start, and her heart beat rapidly. She realized that she was still screaming.
Please Review. Am I still staying in character? Let me know…