When Eric awoke, he found himself in a hospital ward, watching an episode of "Sinefeld" on Nick-@-Nite, The one where George tells Jerry his girlfriend's thumb got cut off in a tractor accident, and it's a toe now. Rugget was asleep, and Marc was getting his foot repositioned.

"Marc," said Eric in a raspy voice "Was shakin'?"

Marc looked over and smiled. Just then, Eric noticed a bandage serading across Marc's head. Then Kris Kapp and his older brother Barney walked in, making Rugget stir.

"Hey" said Kris "Thought you guys might wanna hear some of barney's war stories. They always cheer me up"

"Und Yah," said Rugget "Tell us Var Shtories"

Master Seargent Barney Kapp was Lieutenant Masterson's right arm, so naturally, Masterson was thrilled to hear Kris had made it in to the 4th division, GDI.

Barney did a backflip and landed on the Spectrovision, turinig it off and growled "How old are ye now?"

The words of Fox Mulder echoed through Eric's head "Aww, man, I can't bileve that just happened, Geezus christ, mulder, how old are you now, sixteen?"

Barney continued to talk like a pirate "Back when I joined up, Roy... Er, Lieutenant Masterson, Gave us the exact same same speech he gave you guys, argh, except for he had restrictions on gambling. But one fateful night, Masterson called 'ol barney Kapp up to the hut to bring up a cooler full of coke, argh, because booze was restricted, argh, but he forgot that he ordered it up, argh, and Guess who sat in on Lieutenant Masterson's little POKER GAME?"

"Dan Akroid?" said Eric

"Leslie Nielson?" said Marc

"Doon Noots?" said Rugget

"Wierd Al Yankovic?" said Kris

"ME!!" Said Barney in dismay "Ar, ar, ar, ar," he laughed "And ever scince they've allowed gambling"

"So where are the others?" asked Marc

"Oh," said Kris "That reminds me, We were all sent on a siege"

"When?" Asked Eric suddenly

"Few hours ago," replied Kris "We were sent by APC. Masterson made me stay and gaurd the base"

Eric put his hands down on the bed, and lurched upward, only to discover his hands were bandaged... and chared. He got up anyways, stripped off his gown and walked into the next room. In the other room, Eric looked at the bundles of clothing sprawled out on the shelf, all labeled "Simmons, Bonner, Peters" They had been patched up. Eric grabbed them and took them into the ward, and threw them to their proper owners. "Put 'em on" said eric "See how they fit".

Marc looked at Eric like some sort of madman, and then quoted "Eh?"

"We," Eric explained "Are going to battle. And you, Barney Kapp, Are going to help us"

"Me?" Growled Barney in his usual gruff voice "What do you propose I do, Mr. Junior commander?"

"Very funny" said Eric "But at any rate, Your job is to sweet talk Masterson."

"Ummm..." said barney "I'm a HETEROsexual, just so you know."

Eric just looked at barney like some kind of wierdo

"Army joke" Said Barney

Eric explained his plan to his cohorts in great depth his plan of escape, no leaving out a thing

"So," barney said "Anything ELSE?"

Eric thought a minute

"Yes"

Everyone looked at Eric

"DON'T WAKE DADDY!!"

Everyone laughed, then moved in for the kill

Barney had to, as mentioned "sweet talk Lieutenant Masterson, and who better to do it than Barney Kapp?

"Roy," said Barney, walking up to Lieutenant Masterson "How goes the trials?"

"Mmmm," said Lieutenant "Just sent in my application, hope they get back to me in time"

"Well," said Barney "I hope you make it. You'd make a damn fine captain."

"Thanks, Barn" said Lieutenant masterson "Maybe, in the near future, they'll make you a Lieutenant, 2nd class."

"May-be" said Barney "May-be"

The static wave came over Barney's radio

"*chh* Mmm, roger alpha-niner, copy that, yes'm, over, *chh*"

"What?"

"These boys in the medical ward need to be shipped off, for better medical attention, over"

"You need supervision" chimed in Lieutenant Masterson

"Yes'm, request permission to use E2 Kris Kapp and E9 Barney Kapp, over"

"Roger that" said Masterson. he looked at Barney a minute

"You got a job to do, Barn. Hop to it."

Barney saluted masterson, then jogged over to the helipad, and with Kris' assistance, loaded the boys in an orca transport, via stretcher.