Chapter1- THE FORCE WILL HAVE ITS WAY
Fourteen years later
Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn walked through the deep shrub of the Border Forest, his Lightsaber knocking against his hip with every step he took. The Jedi was a tall, powerfully built middle aged man. He had seen much in his lifetime, the age of his experiences showing clearly in his crystal blue eyes. His grey hair spilled over his shoulders and down to his waist, wisps falling into his eyes, blown there by the gentle, evening wind. He wore a heavy Jedi robe and thick tunics but they did nothing to hide his muscular form or the various weapons that he carried. The only Jedi Brother to do so, marking him as the legendary Jinn.
Qui-Gon was tired and hungry. He desperately needed somewhere to rest and perhaps somewhere warm and safe to spend the night. His footsteps carried him on, deeper into the forest that sung with life and spoke deep into his soul. He cast his gaze about, looking for some kind of shelter. He would have stopped where he stood if not for the gentle, persistent nudges from the Force. He was about ready to give up when he saw a thin wisp of smoke rising into the sky. He followed the smoke trail down and saw a chimney popping up from beneath the smaller trees. Just ahead lay a small cabin, nestled within a clearing. A sigh of relief escaped the Jedi Master's lips at the sight.
/Thank the Force/ he thought and walked towards the little dwelling. As he grew close he could see a figure working in the cabin's little garden. Qui-Gon studied the young, fit body from a distance. The man was shorter than the Jedi but he was muscular, he had hair the colour of chestnuts that was set aflame with gold when the light touched it. There was something else about him, something that drew Qui-Gon to him.
/Like a moth to a flame./ Qui-Gon mused.
He approached slowly, not wishing to startle the younger man. When he was a ten yards away the youth looked up, straight at Qui-Gon. The Jedi Master looked deep into misty green eyes that seemed far to knowing for the boyish, young face. Qui-Gon forcing a smile to his lips, which he found easier than he expected, he stepped into the clearing. The other man stood perfectly still as Qui-Gon drew closer to him.
"Greetings. I have been travelling a long time and was wondering if I may rest here awhile." Qui-Gon wasn't sure if the boy would answer, when finally the smooth face broke out in to a generous smile.
"Of course, my Lord." He bent low in a deep bow of respect. "Would you like some refreshments?"
The Jedi warrior stepped closer to the other man, feeling more relaxed by the courtesy extended to him. He was led to the porch where he was offered a seat facing outwards onto the forest. He was left alone for the briefest of moments as his host went inside to gather food. He returned with a tray of fruits and bread.
"How rude of me, I didn't identify myself. I'm..." He was cut off.
"Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn." The look of surprise must have showed on his face for the boy went on to explain. "You wear the robes of a Jedi but you also carry weaponry. There is only one warrior Jedi, my Lord." Qui-Gon smiled and was treated to a shy smile in return.
"You have me at a disadvantage, what is your name?"
"Ben."
They sat quietly for awhile, enjoying the presence of the other without realising why. A quiet contentment swept over Qui-Gon, something he had not felt for fifteen years. He felt safe. He smiled to himself.
"So, My Lord Jedi, what brings you to the Border Forest?" Ben gazed at Qui-Gon through thick eyelashes, his green eyes flashing with lust.
"I am on my way to meet the Jedi council before they move south for the winter."
"Have you been travelling long?"
"Yes, weeks." Ben put his hand on Qui-Gon's knee in mute sympathy.
"You must be exhausted, is your journey nearly at an end?" The Jedi Master hadn't missed Ben's subtle body language. The casual touch, the searching looks, the way he leaned slightly towards him when he spoke.
"I hope so, Ben. I hope so." He was about to cover Ben's hand with his own when the younger man sat back, withdrawing his touch.
"I'm glad." Qui-Gon tried not to think of the lingering warmth left be Ben's hand or his gentle touch.
/I must be getting old, I'm starting to miss the small comforts in life/ As that thought occurred to him a familiar presence swept across his shields, bumping them slightly. Qui-Gon sat very stiffly, waiting for a reoccurrence of the phenomenon, but none came to confirm the presence he felt.
"Are you alright?"
Qui-Gon turned to his companion who was staring at him intently. He looked down at his own hands and realised they were shaking. Hastily he tucked them into his robes.
/Answer him, you foolish old man, before you scare him any more./
"Yes, I'm fine. Just a little tired."
"Oh... Then please come in, there is a spare bed if you wish to spend the night here."
Qui-Gon had the sudden desire to stay as long as possible with this man, his bright smile, his cultured voice and his obvious intelligence.
"That would be wonderful, lead the way."
Ben led the Jedi warrior into his home to the spare bedroom at the back of the cabin. The tiny room had a small bed on one side facing a window with a view of the Border Forest. Ben kept shooting glances at the Jedi. He hadn't expected that kind of reaction from his probe; maybe it had been a coincidence.
/You don't believe in coincidences./ He reminded himself, but when Qui-Gon had turned a deathly shade of white he knew it was because of him, all he needed to know now was why. Qui-Gon's voice broke Ben from his thoughts.
"It's very kind of you to let a stranger into your house, especially when you live so close to the dark border. I could have been anyone."
"If you can't trust a Jedi, who can you trust?" Humour seemed to dance behind Ben's eyes as he looked at the Jedi.
"I could have been a dark Jedi." Qui-Gon reasoned solemnly
"No you're not."
"And how can you tell?" Qui-Gon was surprised by the answer.
"The same way you know I am not an agent of the dark. Sometimes you just know." Looking at the Jedi for a moment Ben spoke again. "If you give me your robes I would be happy to wash them for you."
Qui-Gon thought for a moment deciding to take the young man up on his offer. Clean tunics and a goodnight's rest would refresh him before continuing his journey. The Jedi Master nodded his thanks and began to undress.
First he took off his heavy robe that had the brotherhood's emblem embroidered on it in shades of purple and turquoise, the only colour on the voluminous black cloak. He sat on the bed to remove his boots, the whole time conscious of the other man's eyes on him. Before he could get distracted he focused his attention on the clasps of his boots. He let out a small sigh of release as they slipped from his feet. He stood to remove the rest of his clothes.
Next to come off was his leather belt that had a pouch for all his keepsakes. He left that on the bed with the robe. He took of his sash next which he handed to Ben. He undid his outer tunic, shrugging out of it noticing Ben's sharp intake of breath. Qui-Gon smiled to himself. He moved his hands up his body, skimming over thin material with well toned flesh beneath it. He stretched up wards letting out a small groan as his muscles pulled tight. Pretending not to notice Ben's expression he removed his inner tunic, revealing a body finely tuned over years of conditioning. He handed Ben both his tunics.
Ben absently put his hand out to take the clothes but his eyes were raking over Qui-Gon's torso. Seeing the ripple of muscle as he moved and noting every scar and wondering at the story and adventure behind them. Realising he was staring, Ben blinked and dragged his eyes up to meet Qui-Gon's. The Jedi was smiling down at him. Resisting the urge to gulp, Ben met the older man's gaze squarely.
"Leggings?"
Without a word Qui-Gon bent over and slipped his trousers down his long legs, slowly revealing powerful thighs. When the leggings were pooled at his ankles he stood up straight, completely naked. He stepped out of the clothing at his feet and handed then to Ben who was now staring at the floor, trying not to look at the Jedi's magnificent body.
"I'll have them ready for you by tomorrow morning."
"Thank you." Qui-Gon practically purred at Ben who visibly melted under the vocal cures. Ben looked at Qui-Gon and whispered in a voice hoarse with lust,
"Goodnight *my* Lord Jedi." He gave the older man a shy smile as he bade the warrior goodnight and left him alone in the tiny room. Qui-Gon hadn't missed the emphasis on 'my'.
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Sleep didn't come easily to either man that night, but it remained elusive for different reasons. Qui-Gon lay on his narrow cot, staring out the window that let in the ghostly light of the stars and the full moon. From where he lay he could see it in all its beauty, its peace and tranquillity reflected in his own soul. He felt content to be in this house, to be near a man who was almost a total stranger, but there was, within that young, beautiful body a presence that was so familiar, but he was still unable to say why or give it a name.
/Almost like my soul's reflection./
For that night he lived in the moment, enjoying the unknown, but not unwelcome, presence. He would ask the questions tomorrow when what he felt wasn't such a precious comfort, in the morning when the light of the suns banished the cold darkness, tomorrow when the golden light touched the Border Forest. When the night had withered away he would no longer need the shield the presence provided and so he would be free to exam what he felt and why.
Ben lay within his bed on the other side of the cabin; unlike Qui-Gon's room Ben's room was dark and sheltered away from the shimmering, pale light of the moon. His thoughts matched his surroundings, influenced by the dark presence that never seemed to leave his side. It wasn't part of him but it was always there none the less. Ben spent that first night shivering beneath his blankets, terrified. He didn't understand what he felt from the Jedi warrior, all he wanted was to be in those powerful arms. In those brief minutes together the darkness seemed to lift, retreating from the Jedi's light. He wanted that back but was afraid of what it would cost him so he lay awake, his thoughts a tumbling mess of emotions.
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In the morning Qui-Gon found his clothes neatly folded at the foot of his bed. When he rose to do his morning exercise and meditation, he was pleased to see Ben as he went outside. The younger man greeted him with a nod of his head before continuing with his task. Qui-Gon found a soft patch of grass to sit on while he sank into a moment of quiet reflection. One thought and explanation kept resurfacing, but it was a 'what if'... he could not stand by another 'what if'... and this one, to his mind, was illogical. Finding meditation unsuccessful he opened his senses to the Living Force that surrounded him and began the Kata of Beauty. As he went through the positions he became more aware of his surroundings and his place within it.
The trees rose high above him on all sides but sun light had a clear path through the roof of foliage to the clearing where Ben's home stood. The beauty of the place struck Qui-Gon but as his connection grew deeper he felt something else. A taint. It wasn't Ben but there was something here. He wished he had time to find out what it was but he needed to meet up with the Jedi council. He could not stay here forever, however much he may wish to.
/Maybe he'll go with you./
The thought came from nowhere, as if someone else had spoken it deep within his soul, he also realised that he would like it very much if Ben would accompany him on his journey. His eyes rested on Ben's form as he worked in the garden, weeding the carrot patch. He sighed,
/The simple pleasures in life./
Qui-Gon brushed himself off, smiling as he did so. Perhaps he could help out a little while he was here, to repay the young man for his kindness. With that thought he began walking towards the cabin's garden.
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The moment the Jedi Master began walking towards him, Ben was aware of it. All of his senses seemed to be in tune and in perfect harmony with the older man. There seemed to be an intimate touch between their souls, and the sheer possibility sent a shiver of joy down his spine. He straightened from his digging to look at Qui-Gon as he walked towards him. What he saw took his breath away. Every time he saw the Jedi his desire for the man grew, the way the suns shone on his silver hair and the way he moved with unconscious grace and the way his soulful blue eyes looked deep within him. Time stood still for both as they gazed at each other. There was a subtle shift in the Force around them, as if another was there, then both lent forward to steal a light kiss.
Amazed at his own actions Ben pulled away hurriedly, embarrassed of his presumptions. He looked back up to the Jedi who was smiling at him fondly.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
"We could do with some more fire wood." He gestured over to an axe and a large pile of logs. Qui-Gon smiled and moved to comply, briefly wondering what Ben meant when he said we. Was it Ben and himself or another? A new emotion sprang into Qui-Gon's mind, an emotion he had not been acquainted with for some years. Jealousy. What if there was another? What did he or she mean to Ben? How much of his life did he share with this unidentified person? Where they intimate?
Qui-Gon mentally shook himself; he was jumping to conclusions. He was a Jedi Master and these were not thoughts befitting a man like himself. To distract himself further, Qui-Gon began his task.
He took off his tunics, revealing a fine toned, muscled torso with sun kissed skin. The morning sun shone on Qui-Gon's back causing him to sweat. Ben's mouth went dry as he watched drops of perspiration roll down the muscular body. With the strength befitting a warrior, the Jedi Master set about his task.
/Why would someone like that ever want me?/ Sighing regretfully, Ben returned to his work.
Out of the corner of his eye, Qui-Gon saw Ben gazing at him with undisguised lust. The young man sighed suddenly. Qui-Gon wondered what he had been thinking to cause such a heartfelt sound. He shook his head in frustration, it was no good, he couldn't stop thinking about the man who was now back at work, fifteen yards from where he was.
/And that kiss hasn't helped anything./
Ben seemed to be in his blood and the attraction grew with every beat of his heart.
/What bewitchment is this? That I could fall in love with someone I don't even know./ He suddenly understood what it was he was feeling. Love, as simple as that. /My Queen, My Adi, I love you still but I am unable to resist him. I wish I could talk to you./
Bitterness filled Qui-Gon for the briefest of moments. He was alone and had been for fifteen years and now this boy had broken into his heart with a kind word and a smile. But then just as suddenly it was gone, the bitterness of fifteen years evaporated with the memory of love that could be again.
/Live in the moment./ He smiled and for the first time in fifteen years it was a genuine one of complete joy.
After an hour Qui-Gon put down his axe, stretching his back. He looked around for Ben who had been working his way along the beds of shrubs but when he looked around the garden only a lone shovel stood. The Jedi Master heard a door bang behind him. Qui-Gon turned to see Ben walking towards him carrying a pitcher of water, two glasses and a bowl of fruit.
Qui-Gon smiled at Ben who blushed as he set the tray down. The Jedi warrior walked over to his companion, and when he stood before him he leaned forward, moving his body closer until he could feel the heat from Ben's body.
Ben was acutely aware of Qui-Gon's body as he leaned closer to him. The well toned flesh was mere inches from him. He watched a droplet of sweat run down Qui-Gon's chest, slipping over well defined muscle. He tracked it down with his eyes past Qui-Gon's nipple down to the top of the Jedi's leggings where it soaked into the material. Ben looked back up to the Jedi's face, lust filled green eyes met inflamed blue ones.
"You look hot, my Lord Jedi."
"Indeed I am, Ben."
"Perhaps you should have a drink." Qui-Gon didn't answer; instead he put his arm around the younger man. Ben held his breath but instead of the embrace he had been expecting Qui-Gon withdrew with a piece of fruit in his hand.
"Tease." Slipped out of Ben's lips before he remembered who he was talking to and could censor the thought. Completely straight-faced Qui-Gon replied,
"Jedi don't tease." And with that he took a bit out of the ripe fruit allowing the juice to trickle over his chin.
"Oh, really." Ben watched as a smug grin spread across the Jedi Master's face. The only warning Qui-Gon got was the mischievous glint in Ben's eyes before he found himself drenched in water with Ben standing before him holding the now empty pitcher.
"You don't look hot now, my Lord Jedi." Qui-Gon felt the cool water taking the heat from his body as it evaporated in the suns' heat, and the triumphant look on Ben's face told him he had lost.
"Thank you, Ben. I feel very refreshed." With an air of satisfaction Ben returned to tending his garden and after watching for a few moments, so did Qui-Gon.
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Midday meal soon approached and with the strenuous activities he had been doing Qui-Gon found he had quite an appetite, and not just for food. He wanted to hear Ben's quiet spoken voice and see his radiant smile.
/Love smitten fool./ Qui-Gon thought but decided he didn't mind in the slightest.
Ben moved around the kitchen with ease, preparing a light meal for himself and his guest and as he did so, Qui-Gon took the time to look closer at his surroundings. The inside of the cabin, like the outside, was neat and well kept but this place didn't feel like Ben somehow, another presence was here, drowning out Ben's. Ben couldn't have been here long enough to create a powerful imprint on the cabin. There were no books in the house which surprised Qui-Gon. Ben seemed like a well educated man, yet there were no signs of it here.
"Lived here long?" Ben turned to look at the Jedi.
"Yes. This was my childhood home."
/Huh./ From what he was sensing Ben had not been here that long. And there was something else too, niggling at the back of his mind.
"Live alone?" Ben froze for a fraction of a second and if Qui-Gon hadn't been watching closely he would have missed it.
"No, I live here with my step brother." Ben wouldn't look at him now.
/Odd/
"Where is he?"
"He goes off days at a time, I never know when he'll be back." There was hidden meaning to that but Qui-Gon didn't push any further. Ben was clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. He didn't want to pry.
/Well, not yet./
After a long tiring day of chores, the two men sat in front of a blazing fire. It was still summer but with winter's approach, the nights were becoming longer and colder. Night was also the time when the dark was most powerful and in the coming months, its strength would grow. A fire's light offered some comfort even if it was only superficial. They talked well into the night, nothing personal, just each taking joy in the other's intelligence. They talked about the state of their world and the war and of the forest outside. Qui-Gon was pleasantly surprised by Ben's level of understanding in both natural and human matters. As the evening progressed they became comfortable in each other's presence and Ben seemed to forget the Jedi and see the man by no longer calling him 'my Lord'.
Ben stood to refill his mug, and when he turned to address Qui-Gon he found the Jedi standing before him. He gazed into his blue crystal eyes and saw everything he was feeling reflected back.
"Qui-Gon, I..."
"Ssssh." Qui-Gon took Ben's cup from his hand and placed it on the table, he moved closer to the younger man, never breaking eye contact. "Don't talk." Qui-Gon leaned forward and took Ben's lips in a gentle kiss. Encouraged by Ben not pulling away like before, he deepened the kiss, seeking entrance into the velvet softness. Ben submitted easily and soon both men had their arms wrapped around the other, desperately seeking the love the other was offering. They regretfully pulled back and as they did, the world snapped back into focus around them.
"I'm sorry."
Before Qui-Gon could answer, Ben was pulling away and retreating to his own room. Qui-Gon was hurt by Ben's sudden withdrawal but he had the feeling it wasn't him that had caused it. Ben was upset about something and Qui-Gon was determined to find out what it was, he had felt the love in Ben's kiss and he needed to know what was holding Ben away.
Qui-Gon tried to follow Ben but found he couldn't. There was a pressure inside of him, pushing him to his own room instead of Ben's. He wanted to question what was happening but found his mind sluggish. He made it to his bed before falling into an unnatural sleep.
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Qui-Gon had a restless night, his thoughts churning over what had happened between Ben and himself. He awoke more than once from a nightmare that faded away into his subconscious until no memory of it remained. Near sunrise Qui-Gon awoke to a sharp banging noise, he was sure he could hear hushed voices, one angry and the other afraid. He was about to get up and investigate when the whispering abruptly stopped. He thought he heard a thud as something hit the floor but he couldn't be sure. After several minutes of silence, exhaustion claimed him and he slipped into a light sleep.
Outside his door a figure stood hidden in shadow, his ear pressed to the door listening for any further movement.
"I'm sorry Qui-Gon to do this to you twice."
If the Jedi had been prepared for such an attack he would never have succumbed to Ben's gentle prodding but Qui-Gon trusted Ben. Ben pulled his senses back into himself feeling guilt over his manipulation of the Jedi Master and the abuse of his trust but he had seen no other way.
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Qui-Gon awoke with the dawn. He lay in his bed, watching the world become alight with the flame of the suns. The golden light began to cascade over the tree tops giving the Border Forest a glowing halo of fire and for the moment he could almost forget the Dark Border that lay beyond. Soon after he woke Qui-Gon herd noises coming from the kitchen. He rose in search of breakfast.
He wandered into the kitchen to find Ben hard at work preparing a cooked breakfast.
"Can I help?"
"No, please sit down." Ben didn't turn around when he addressed the Jedi and Qui-Gon detected a note of strain in his voice. Qui-Gon crossed the small kitchen area to stand behind Ben.
"Are you alright?" Taking the other man's arm he gently turned his so they were face to face. He gasped in surprise. A dark bruise marred Ben's cheek and there was a nasty cut above his eyebrow. The Jedi began to bring his arm up to heal the minor wound but he was stopped by Ben's grip on his wrist.
"Who did that?"
"No one." Ben's eyes betrayed his misery. "I fell." Ben quickly turned back to the cooking food, ignoring Qui-Gon. "Please sit down." Just then he heard footsteps approaching and then there was another man entering the kitchen.
"My lord, this is my stepbrother, Bruck." Qui-Gon bowed to the other man noticing the startling differences between the two men. Bruck was taller than Ben and had long white hair. His skin, like his hair, was pale, white in comparison to Ben's tanned body. With his Jedi senses Qui-Gon also detected a faint taint in his aura, nothing too obvious but there was definitely something there, shaded away from everything else.
"Ah yes, my brother said we had an honoured guest last night when I returned home. I hope I didn't disturb you." Qui-Gon shook his head; he did not miss the flash of jealousy that flashed across Bruck's blue eyes or the anger that accompanied it. Nor did he miss the mocking tone that he used when he referred to his step brother. "Good, please sit down with me, I am no chef so I leave the cooking to Ben who is quite exceptional." Qui-Gon sat down with Bruck talking to him about the army's activities. He spoke often without giving anything away. He noticed Ben's absence, as soon as breakfast was set on the table he had left, going out into the yard. Qui-Gon felt that the room was oddly darker with out him in it.
"How did the two of you come to living together?" He asked in a casual tone but he was anxious to hear the answer. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know but he felt that he should, between the man's aura and the warnings in the Force he had deduced very quickly where the bruise on Ben's cheek had come from. He had only know Ben for little over a day but he felt protective of the youth and so he felt compelled to ask.
"My father and his mother were married for a short time. She died when Ben was seven, leaving him in my father's care."
"And Ben's father?"
"Died when Ben was five, my own father died last year, Ben returned here shortly after leaving the army."
"The army?"
"Yes, he never made much of himself though, he is still a weed like he was as a child." Bruck was easily ten years older than Ben and Qui-Gon wondered at their past relationship.
"I think I may go out for my morning meditation." Qui-Gon walked away from the cabin, making sure it was still within view he sat down to meditate and watch. Bruck had been very polite to him during their morning meal but it had seemed so fake. At that moment Bruck came out of the Cabin, approaching Ben from behind. When he was ten yards away he stopped and look around him,
/Checking for me./
Believing Qui-Gon was nowhere around, Bruck began shouting at his stepbrother. Qui-Gon was too far away to hear what was being said but he suspected he was the cause of Bruck's outburst. His suspicions were confirmed when a wave of jealousy and anger hit him, its source was clearly Bruck, but what did surprise the Jedi was the sympathy which rolled off of Ben and reached out to Bruck. Ben said nothing as he was laid into for no reason other than to show compassion to another person. He took the verbal abuse, showing no signs of defence. The one-sided argument ended when Bruck stormed back inside the house, slamming the door behind him.
The gentle peace that Qui-Gon had felt upon arriving and meeting Ben was shattered. He wished he could do something but he could not linger there much longer, he had to meet up with the Jedi council before they began their southward journey for winter. But the Force had led him to this isolated home among the trees. Frustration gripped his mind for an instant. If only he knew what needed to be done.
/I will see how things progress and if necessary I'll take him with me./
What if he won't leave?
Qui-Gon didn't even want to think about the possibility. Ben had been terrified last night when he had kissed him but it had felt so right. He could not imagine being without the quiet thoughtful man. After a time Ben had come out of his shell and the Jedi was delighted to find a keen intellect and a wicked sense of humour. He didn't want to lose what they had found together. They were meant to be together, the Force was practically telling them that and Qui-Gon was sure that Ben felt it too.
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Later that afternoon Ben was once again working in the yard, and Bruck was in the barn tending to the few animals the two men owned. This was the ideal opportunity to approach Ben. The closeness they had built up seemed to have vanished but Qui-Gon was not deceived by the surface feelings he could sense.
/Or maybe I'm just plain stubborn./
"Ben, may I speak with you?" Ben whirled around, clearly surprised by the appearance of the older man. He glanced over at the barn, nervously.
"Of course, my Lord. How may I help?"
"I was hoping you would let me help you."
"I'm sorry, my Lord, I don't understand." Ben began to fidget, growing more nervous with every passing second.
"Ben, what happened? I thought we had become friends." Qui-Gon's proximity made Ben nervous, he kept glancing over to the barn where he knew Bruck was. He leaned forward, whispering to the older man.
"Please, Qui-Gon, not now." Not daring to remain any longer, Ben stepped away heading towards the house. Qui-Gon didn't let his irritation take over. Instead he followed the other man, determined to get an answer one way or another.
"Ben, please let me help you."
"What can you do?" his voice held the dull tone of inevitable failure.
"Leave with me."
"Don't you think I've tried that? He always finds me. He has allies, powerful allies."
"Don't you feel it? There is a connection between us. I don't believe I could live without it now that I have found it. I don't understand it but I know what it is, it's love. I love you Ben and I want you. Let me help you." Tears streamed down Ben's face, Qui-Gon's confession reaching deep within him to the part he had hidden away.
"I love you too." The power of his emotions caused Ben's voice to come out in a harsh whisper, "but how can that help?"
"You have lost your faith," Qui-Gon said. Ben didn't answer so he continued. "I can feel the Force all around us, this love is born from it, it is light itself. It is meant to be. The Force will protect us if we follow it. Please give me the chance to prove it to you, to restore your faith." The conviction in Qui-Gon's voice stopped Ben's flow of tears but it left the ever present sadness.
"I don't understand how but I know I love you, Qui-Gon. It may be the will of the Force, it could be fate, but even if it is I am still afraid." A gentle sigh escaped Ben's lips. "I will stay here, the dark is close by and Bruck is strong because of it. He's half Jedi you know?" The Jedi Master didn't try and hide his surprise, he hadn't sensed any thing from Bruck which perhaps showed how strong he was, at least in this place. Ben turned away, gazing out into the deep forest. His voice dropped as he remembered a time long ago. "His father was a Jedi, although I question his allegiances to the light; a fallen Jedi perhaps. But what do I know, the son of a simple farmer."
"And a soldier from what I hear." Qui-Gon saw a smile blossom across Ben's face before he schooled his features back into a neutral mask.
"Yes, I was a soldier, but I returned here hoping Bruck was different, that I could help him and in my ignorance I have become a prisoner in my own family home. These are the things that the Force has given me. I see no light here, it is obscured by there trees and I am unable to pass beyond them so you will forgive me if I do not believe that love will save me. The dark is too powerful and for now I am to weak to fight it." Ben strode away from the Jedi Master. Qui-Gon couldn't bring himself to follow, he could now feel the darkness that surrounded Ben, but he could also sense that the darkness was not part of the younger man.
/He said for now. That means there is still hope deep within Ben and hope is definitely of the light./ Qui-Gon returned to his meditation determined to show Ben what he already knew.
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He spent the evening with Bruck, learning all he could about the man, his strengths, his weaknesses and ways that he could exploit them. He retired for the night confident in his ability to free Ben from this man.
It was late when he was once again woken by noises. He rose, hoping to stop Bruck before he went too far. As he reached the door that led into the corridor a loud crash from the main living area broke the silence of the night. Fearing the worst Qui-Gon rushed out of his little room.
The Jedi Master halted when he reached the other part of the cabin; the sight and the feeling of darkness that emanated from what felt like everything stunned him. The room was completely destroyed. All the furniture was turned over, bits of plates and glass were scattered all over the floor and amongst them lay splinters of wood. A sharp gust of wind swept through the cabin through the open door extinguishing all the candles that remained alight. He carefully walked over the debris to close the door. As he lowered the latch he heard a muffled sob from the corner of the room.
As Qui-Gon squinted into the darkness, the silver light of the moon revealed a figure huddled on the floor. Terror radiated from him in waves. The sandy hair revealed the figure to be Ben. Slowly he walked forward not wishing to frighten him any more than he already was. When the boy made no move he crouched down by his side.
"Ben?"
Ben's face was hidden in shadow but Qui-Gon could see the mottled bruises on his arm and neck. Qui-Gon sent his Force sense outwards, searching for the tainted aura of Bruck. All he could feel was the Border Forest and the night creatures that lived there. They were alone, for now.
"He has gone, Ben. Let me help you." He didn't get an answer but Ben reached forward grasping Qui-Gon's sleeping tunic. The Jedi's hands came up smoothing over the tight grip. He gently held the younger man's hands between his own.
"It will be alright" Qui-Gon gathered Ben into his arms picking him up off the floor. Ben shivered in his arms as he carried him over the devastated furniture. Ben's sobs reduced to quiet hiccups as he snuggled into the reassuring warmth.
Gently Qui-Gon put Ben down on his bed. He left the youth for a moment to light a candle. The orange glow from the tiny flame flickered across the room and Ben's face. There were streaks of tears on his cheeks and his green eyes glittered with unshed tears.
"Sssh, it'll be alright. Lie down." Qui-Gon helped Ben under the covers, they would have to leave in the morning, but for now Ben needed some rest. Qui-Gon rose only to be stopped by a white hand gripping his wrist.
"Don't leave me." The desperate behind the plea wrenched at the Jedi's heart.
"I won't." Ever. He added to himself. "Sleep now, we'll leave at dawn if you are willing to come."
"I'll go with you." A ghost of a smile swept over Ben's lips as he drifted into an uneasy sleep. Qui-Gon began packing, the suns would rise soon and they must be on their way by first light.
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When the first touches of light came to the forest Qui-Gon Jinn was ready. He had packed up his things and salvaged some food from the kitchen. He now stood on the porch waiting for Ben to finish collecting his things and join him.
Bruck had not returned during the night but Qui-Gon was ready for him if he did reappear. There was more to Bruck than what met the eye. And even though Qui-Gon was a full Jedi Master he was weary. Despite knowing there was still something not right around them Qui-Gon was determined to succeed in helping Ben escape. He loved the youth, of that he was sure, even if he couldn't understand how. And now he knew that Ben loved him and wanted to be with him. All that stood between them was this place.
Ben appeared on the porch next to Qui-Gon carrying a small bag.
"This is all I want." Ben look around sadly, at what had once been his family home, a place of happiness. And what had later it had become his prison. But now he was free. Ben looked at the tall Jedi and loved filled his senses. This was right, what he felt was right and leaving was right. He inhaled deeply, savouring the crisp morning air and a small, happy smile adorned his lips and contentment showed in his eyes.
"Let's go."
He held out his hand to Qui-Gon who took it with gentle strength. Ben led the Jedi around the cabin to the barn where the animals were kept. Within it were two beautiful horses, one black, and the other white. They were stark contrasts and total opposites to each other but they seemed to go together so well.
/Like us./
"Thunder and Lightning."
Qui-Gon didn't need to be told which animal was which. Their beauty and power shone from within and their colouring gave them their names. Ben began pulling tack from hook and putting saddles on the pair of horses.
"I brought them with me when I left the army. Lightning is faster, but Thunder, with his sturdier build, is more suited for battle." He looked away from the stall to see blue eyes as he spoke next. "Bruck's been riding Thunder."
Ben finished putting the tack on the horses in silence; the Jedi watched his gentle but confident movements from the barn door. Both men jumped when a sound of glass shattering broke the relative calm, breaking them both from their hypnotic actions. Ben tensed in fear, glancing towards the larger man, desperate to see reassurance.
"What was that?"
"I'll go and see."
"Take Thunder with you."
Qui-Gon mounted the horse and trotted him out to the front of the cabin. The wooden building was in flames. Fire licked at the windows and roof, burning through them, setting the whole building alight. Qui-Gon looked on with horror, his paralysis broken by the startled cry from the Barn. Turning his horse around Qui-Gon hurried back to Ben only to find him trapped in the barn, the doors obscured by fire. Bruck stood watching with a torch in his hand, admiring his handy work and feeding off Ben's fear.
"Ben, jump." There was nothing Qui-Gon could do as he watched the flames grow higher devouring the wooden structure. "Bruck, why?"
"I won't let him go."
Out of the corner of his eye Qui-Gon saw Ben mount Lightning. Turning fully he was in time to see Ben urge the horse into a gallop heading straight for the burning exit. As the horse leaped into the air the wall of flames seemed to shrink back, making a gap for the mare and her rider. Bruck was furious at Ben's escape and he began screaming his anger at the retreating forms of Ben and Qui-Gon.
The two men raced off, side by side, away from the burning cabin and Bruck's hateful words. The flames fed on the little dwelling, cleansing it of the Darkness, which had choked it for so long.
"Damn you Ben, I'll find you."
Ben ignored the threats as he rode away next to the man who he loved and who had the power to set him free.
Fourteen years later
Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn walked through the deep shrub of the Border Forest, his Lightsaber knocking against his hip with every step he took. The Jedi was a tall, powerfully built middle aged man. He had seen much in his lifetime, the age of his experiences showing clearly in his crystal blue eyes. His grey hair spilled over his shoulders and down to his waist, wisps falling into his eyes, blown there by the gentle, evening wind. He wore a heavy Jedi robe and thick tunics but they did nothing to hide his muscular form or the various weapons that he carried. The only Jedi Brother to do so, marking him as the legendary Jinn.
Qui-Gon was tired and hungry. He desperately needed somewhere to rest and perhaps somewhere warm and safe to spend the night. His footsteps carried him on, deeper into the forest that sung with life and spoke deep into his soul. He cast his gaze about, looking for some kind of shelter. He would have stopped where he stood if not for the gentle, persistent nudges from the Force. He was about ready to give up when he saw a thin wisp of smoke rising into the sky. He followed the smoke trail down and saw a chimney popping up from beneath the smaller trees. Just ahead lay a small cabin, nestled within a clearing. A sigh of relief escaped the Jedi Master's lips at the sight.
/Thank the Force/ he thought and walked towards the little dwelling. As he grew close he could see a figure working in the cabin's little garden. Qui-Gon studied the young, fit body from a distance. The man was shorter than the Jedi but he was muscular, he had hair the colour of chestnuts that was set aflame with gold when the light touched it. There was something else about him, something that drew Qui-Gon to him.
/Like a moth to a flame./ Qui-Gon mused.
He approached slowly, not wishing to startle the younger man. When he was a ten yards away the youth looked up, straight at Qui-Gon. The Jedi Master looked deep into misty green eyes that seemed far to knowing for the boyish, young face. Qui-Gon forcing a smile to his lips, which he found easier than he expected, he stepped into the clearing. The other man stood perfectly still as Qui-Gon drew closer to him.
"Greetings. I have been travelling a long time and was wondering if I may rest here awhile." Qui-Gon wasn't sure if the boy would answer, when finally the smooth face broke out in to a generous smile.
"Of course, my Lord." He bent low in a deep bow of respect. "Would you like some refreshments?"
The Jedi warrior stepped closer to the other man, feeling more relaxed by the courtesy extended to him. He was led to the porch where he was offered a seat facing outwards onto the forest. He was left alone for the briefest of moments as his host went inside to gather food. He returned with a tray of fruits and bread.
"How rude of me, I didn't identify myself. I'm..." He was cut off.
"Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn." The look of surprise must have showed on his face for the boy went on to explain. "You wear the robes of a Jedi but you also carry weaponry. There is only one warrior Jedi, my Lord." Qui-Gon smiled and was treated to a shy smile in return.
"You have me at a disadvantage, what is your name?"
"Ben."
They sat quietly for awhile, enjoying the presence of the other without realising why. A quiet contentment swept over Qui-Gon, something he had not felt for fifteen years. He felt safe. He smiled to himself.
"So, My Lord Jedi, what brings you to the Border Forest?" Ben gazed at Qui-Gon through thick eyelashes, his green eyes flashing with lust.
"I am on my way to meet the Jedi council before they move south for the winter."
"Have you been travelling long?"
"Yes, weeks." Ben put his hand on Qui-Gon's knee in mute sympathy.
"You must be exhausted, is your journey nearly at an end?" The Jedi Master hadn't missed Ben's subtle body language. The casual touch, the searching looks, the way he leaned slightly towards him when he spoke.
"I hope so, Ben. I hope so." He was about to cover Ben's hand with his own when the younger man sat back, withdrawing his touch.
"I'm glad." Qui-Gon tried not to think of the lingering warmth left be Ben's hand or his gentle touch.
/I must be getting old, I'm starting to miss the small comforts in life/ As that thought occurred to him a familiar presence swept across his shields, bumping them slightly. Qui-Gon sat very stiffly, waiting for a reoccurrence of the phenomenon, but none came to confirm the presence he felt.
"Are you alright?"
Qui-Gon turned to his companion who was staring at him intently. He looked down at his own hands and realised they were shaking. Hastily he tucked them into his robes.
/Answer him, you foolish old man, before you scare him any more./
"Yes, I'm fine. Just a little tired."
"Oh... Then please come in, there is a spare bed if you wish to spend the night here."
Qui-Gon had the sudden desire to stay as long as possible with this man, his bright smile, his cultured voice and his obvious intelligence.
"That would be wonderful, lead the way."
Ben led the Jedi warrior into his home to the spare bedroom at the back of the cabin. The tiny room had a small bed on one side facing a window with a view of the Border Forest. Ben kept shooting glances at the Jedi. He hadn't expected that kind of reaction from his probe; maybe it had been a coincidence.
/You don't believe in coincidences./ He reminded himself, but when Qui-Gon had turned a deathly shade of white he knew it was because of him, all he needed to know now was why. Qui-Gon's voice broke Ben from his thoughts.
"It's very kind of you to let a stranger into your house, especially when you live so close to the dark border. I could have been anyone."
"If you can't trust a Jedi, who can you trust?" Humour seemed to dance behind Ben's eyes as he looked at the Jedi.
"I could have been a dark Jedi." Qui-Gon reasoned solemnly
"No you're not."
"And how can you tell?" Qui-Gon was surprised by the answer.
"The same way you know I am not an agent of the dark. Sometimes you just know." Looking at the Jedi for a moment Ben spoke again. "If you give me your robes I would be happy to wash them for you."
Qui-Gon thought for a moment deciding to take the young man up on his offer. Clean tunics and a goodnight's rest would refresh him before continuing his journey. The Jedi Master nodded his thanks and began to undress.
First he took off his heavy robe that had the brotherhood's emblem embroidered on it in shades of purple and turquoise, the only colour on the voluminous black cloak. He sat on the bed to remove his boots, the whole time conscious of the other man's eyes on him. Before he could get distracted he focused his attention on the clasps of his boots. He let out a small sigh of release as they slipped from his feet. He stood to remove the rest of his clothes.
Next to come off was his leather belt that had a pouch for all his keepsakes. He left that on the bed with the robe. He took of his sash next which he handed to Ben. He undid his outer tunic, shrugging out of it noticing Ben's sharp intake of breath. Qui-Gon smiled to himself. He moved his hands up his body, skimming over thin material with well toned flesh beneath it. He stretched up wards letting out a small groan as his muscles pulled tight. Pretending not to notice Ben's expression he removed his inner tunic, revealing a body finely tuned over years of conditioning. He handed Ben both his tunics.
Ben absently put his hand out to take the clothes but his eyes were raking over Qui-Gon's torso. Seeing the ripple of muscle as he moved and noting every scar and wondering at the story and adventure behind them. Realising he was staring, Ben blinked and dragged his eyes up to meet Qui-Gon's. The Jedi was smiling down at him. Resisting the urge to gulp, Ben met the older man's gaze squarely.
"Leggings?"
Without a word Qui-Gon bent over and slipped his trousers down his long legs, slowly revealing powerful thighs. When the leggings were pooled at his ankles he stood up straight, completely naked. He stepped out of the clothing at his feet and handed then to Ben who was now staring at the floor, trying not to look at the Jedi's magnificent body.
"I'll have them ready for you by tomorrow morning."
"Thank you." Qui-Gon practically purred at Ben who visibly melted under the vocal cures. Ben looked at Qui-Gon and whispered in a voice hoarse with lust,
"Goodnight *my* Lord Jedi." He gave the older man a shy smile as he bade the warrior goodnight and left him alone in the tiny room. Qui-Gon hadn't missed the emphasis on 'my'.
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Sleep didn't come easily to either man that night, but it remained elusive for different reasons. Qui-Gon lay on his narrow cot, staring out the window that let in the ghostly light of the stars and the full moon. From where he lay he could see it in all its beauty, its peace and tranquillity reflected in his own soul. He felt content to be in this house, to be near a man who was almost a total stranger, but there was, within that young, beautiful body a presence that was so familiar, but he was still unable to say why or give it a name.
/Almost like my soul's reflection./
For that night he lived in the moment, enjoying the unknown, but not unwelcome, presence. He would ask the questions tomorrow when what he felt wasn't such a precious comfort, in the morning when the light of the suns banished the cold darkness, tomorrow when the golden light touched the Border Forest. When the night had withered away he would no longer need the shield the presence provided and so he would be free to exam what he felt and why.
Ben lay within his bed on the other side of the cabin; unlike Qui-Gon's room Ben's room was dark and sheltered away from the shimmering, pale light of the moon. His thoughts matched his surroundings, influenced by the dark presence that never seemed to leave his side. It wasn't part of him but it was always there none the less. Ben spent that first night shivering beneath his blankets, terrified. He didn't understand what he felt from the Jedi warrior, all he wanted was to be in those powerful arms. In those brief minutes together the darkness seemed to lift, retreating from the Jedi's light. He wanted that back but was afraid of what it would cost him so he lay awake, his thoughts a tumbling mess of emotions.
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In the morning Qui-Gon found his clothes neatly folded at the foot of his bed. When he rose to do his morning exercise and meditation, he was pleased to see Ben as he went outside. The younger man greeted him with a nod of his head before continuing with his task. Qui-Gon found a soft patch of grass to sit on while he sank into a moment of quiet reflection. One thought and explanation kept resurfacing, but it was a 'what if'... he could not stand by another 'what if'... and this one, to his mind, was illogical. Finding meditation unsuccessful he opened his senses to the Living Force that surrounded him and began the Kata of Beauty. As he went through the positions he became more aware of his surroundings and his place within it.
The trees rose high above him on all sides but sun light had a clear path through the roof of foliage to the clearing where Ben's home stood. The beauty of the place struck Qui-Gon but as his connection grew deeper he felt something else. A taint. It wasn't Ben but there was something here. He wished he had time to find out what it was but he needed to meet up with the Jedi council. He could not stay here forever, however much he may wish to.
/Maybe he'll go with you./
The thought came from nowhere, as if someone else had spoken it deep within his soul, he also realised that he would like it very much if Ben would accompany him on his journey. His eyes rested on Ben's form as he worked in the garden, weeding the carrot patch. He sighed,
/The simple pleasures in life./
Qui-Gon brushed himself off, smiling as he did so. Perhaps he could help out a little while he was here, to repay the young man for his kindness. With that thought he began walking towards the cabin's garden.
____________________________________________________________________
The moment the Jedi Master began walking towards him, Ben was aware of it. All of his senses seemed to be in tune and in perfect harmony with the older man. There seemed to be an intimate touch between their souls, and the sheer possibility sent a shiver of joy down his spine. He straightened from his digging to look at Qui-Gon as he walked towards him. What he saw took his breath away. Every time he saw the Jedi his desire for the man grew, the way the suns shone on his silver hair and the way he moved with unconscious grace and the way his soulful blue eyes looked deep within him. Time stood still for both as they gazed at each other. There was a subtle shift in the Force around them, as if another was there, then both lent forward to steal a light kiss.
Amazed at his own actions Ben pulled away hurriedly, embarrassed of his presumptions. He looked back up to the Jedi who was smiling at him fondly.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
"We could do with some more fire wood." He gestured over to an axe and a large pile of logs. Qui-Gon smiled and moved to comply, briefly wondering what Ben meant when he said we. Was it Ben and himself or another? A new emotion sprang into Qui-Gon's mind, an emotion he had not been acquainted with for some years. Jealousy. What if there was another? What did he or she mean to Ben? How much of his life did he share with this unidentified person? Where they intimate?
Qui-Gon mentally shook himself; he was jumping to conclusions. He was a Jedi Master and these were not thoughts befitting a man like himself. To distract himself further, Qui-Gon began his task.
He took off his tunics, revealing a fine toned, muscled torso with sun kissed skin. The morning sun shone on Qui-Gon's back causing him to sweat. Ben's mouth went dry as he watched drops of perspiration roll down the muscular body. With the strength befitting a warrior, the Jedi Master set about his task.
/Why would someone like that ever want me?/ Sighing regretfully, Ben returned to his work.
Out of the corner of his eye, Qui-Gon saw Ben gazing at him with undisguised lust. The young man sighed suddenly. Qui-Gon wondered what he had been thinking to cause such a heartfelt sound. He shook his head in frustration, it was no good, he couldn't stop thinking about the man who was now back at work, fifteen yards from where he was.
/And that kiss hasn't helped anything./
Ben seemed to be in his blood and the attraction grew with every beat of his heart.
/What bewitchment is this? That I could fall in love with someone I don't even know./ He suddenly understood what it was he was feeling. Love, as simple as that. /My Queen, My Adi, I love you still but I am unable to resist him. I wish I could talk to you./
Bitterness filled Qui-Gon for the briefest of moments. He was alone and had been for fifteen years and now this boy had broken into his heart with a kind word and a smile. But then just as suddenly it was gone, the bitterness of fifteen years evaporated with the memory of love that could be again.
/Live in the moment./ He smiled and for the first time in fifteen years it was a genuine one of complete joy.
After an hour Qui-Gon put down his axe, stretching his back. He looked around for Ben who had been working his way along the beds of shrubs but when he looked around the garden only a lone shovel stood. The Jedi Master heard a door bang behind him. Qui-Gon turned to see Ben walking towards him carrying a pitcher of water, two glasses and a bowl of fruit.
Qui-Gon smiled at Ben who blushed as he set the tray down. The Jedi warrior walked over to his companion, and when he stood before him he leaned forward, moving his body closer until he could feel the heat from Ben's body.
Ben was acutely aware of Qui-Gon's body as he leaned closer to him. The well toned flesh was mere inches from him. He watched a droplet of sweat run down Qui-Gon's chest, slipping over well defined muscle. He tracked it down with his eyes past Qui-Gon's nipple down to the top of the Jedi's leggings where it soaked into the material. Ben looked back up to the Jedi's face, lust filled green eyes met inflamed blue ones.
"You look hot, my Lord Jedi."
"Indeed I am, Ben."
"Perhaps you should have a drink." Qui-Gon didn't answer; instead he put his arm around the younger man. Ben held his breath but instead of the embrace he had been expecting Qui-Gon withdrew with a piece of fruit in his hand.
"Tease." Slipped out of Ben's lips before he remembered who he was talking to and could censor the thought. Completely straight-faced Qui-Gon replied,
"Jedi don't tease." And with that he took a bit out of the ripe fruit allowing the juice to trickle over his chin.
"Oh, really." Ben watched as a smug grin spread across the Jedi Master's face. The only warning Qui-Gon got was the mischievous glint in Ben's eyes before he found himself drenched in water with Ben standing before him holding the now empty pitcher.
"You don't look hot now, my Lord Jedi." Qui-Gon felt the cool water taking the heat from his body as it evaporated in the suns' heat, and the triumphant look on Ben's face told him he had lost.
"Thank you, Ben. I feel very refreshed." With an air of satisfaction Ben returned to tending his garden and after watching for a few moments, so did Qui-Gon.
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Midday meal soon approached and with the strenuous activities he had been doing Qui-Gon found he had quite an appetite, and not just for food. He wanted to hear Ben's quiet spoken voice and see his radiant smile.
/Love smitten fool./ Qui-Gon thought but decided he didn't mind in the slightest.
Ben moved around the kitchen with ease, preparing a light meal for himself and his guest and as he did so, Qui-Gon took the time to look closer at his surroundings. The inside of the cabin, like the outside, was neat and well kept but this place didn't feel like Ben somehow, another presence was here, drowning out Ben's. Ben couldn't have been here long enough to create a powerful imprint on the cabin. There were no books in the house which surprised Qui-Gon. Ben seemed like a well educated man, yet there were no signs of it here.
"Lived here long?" Ben turned to look at the Jedi.
"Yes. This was my childhood home."
/Huh./ From what he was sensing Ben had not been here that long. And there was something else too, niggling at the back of his mind.
"Live alone?" Ben froze for a fraction of a second and if Qui-Gon hadn't been watching closely he would have missed it.
"No, I live here with my step brother." Ben wouldn't look at him now.
/Odd/
"Where is he?"
"He goes off days at a time, I never know when he'll be back." There was hidden meaning to that but Qui-Gon didn't push any further. Ben was clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. He didn't want to pry.
/Well, not yet./
After a long tiring day of chores, the two men sat in front of a blazing fire. It was still summer but with winter's approach, the nights were becoming longer and colder. Night was also the time when the dark was most powerful and in the coming months, its strength would grow. A fire's light offered some comfort even if it was only superficial. They talked well into the night, nothing personal, just each taking joy in the other's intelligence. They talked about the state of their world and the war and of the forest outside. Qui-Gon was pleasantly surprised by Ben's level of understanding in both natural and human matters. As the evening progressed they became comfortable in each other's presence and Ben seemed to forget the Jedi and see the man by no longer calling him 'my Lord'.
Ben stood to refill his mug, and when he turned to address Qui-Gon he found the Jedi standing before him. He gazed into his blue crystal eyes and saw everything he was feeling reflected back.
"Qui-Gon, I..."
"Ssssh." Qui-Gon took Ben's cup from his hand and placed it on the table, he moved closer to the younger man, never breaking eye contact. "Don't talk." Qui-Gon leaned forward and took Ben's lips in a gentle kiss. Encouraged by Ben not pulling away like before, he deepened the kiss, seeking entrance into the velvet softness. Ben submitted easily and soon both men had their arms wrapped around the other, desperately seeking the love the other was offering. They regretfully pulled back and as they did, the world snapped back into focus around them.
"I'm sorry."
Before Qui-Gon could answer, Ben was pulling away and retreating to his own room. Qui-Gon was hurt by Ben's sudden withdrawal but he had the feeling it wasn't him that had caused it. Ben was upset about something and Qui-Gon was determined to find out what it was, he had felt the love in Ben's kiss and he needed to know what was holding Ben away.
Qui-Gon tried to follow Ben but found he couldn't. There was a pressure inside of him, pushing him to his own room instead of Ben's. He wanted to question what was happening but found his mind sluggish. He made it to his bed before falling into an unnatural sleep.
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Qui-Gon had a restless night, his thoughts churning over what had happened between Ben and himself. He awoke more than once from a nightmare that faded away into his subconscious until no memory of it remained. Near sunrise Qui-Gon awoke to a sharp banging noise, he was sure he could hear hushed voices, one angry and the other afraid. He was about to get up and investigate when the whispering abruptly stopped. He thought he heard a thud as something hit the floor but he couldn't be sure. After several minutes of silence, exhaustion claimed him and he slipped into a light sleep.
Outside his door a figure stood hidden in shadow, his ear pressed to the door listening for any further movement.
"I'm sorry Qui-Gon to do this to you twice."
If the Jedi had been prepared for such an attack he would never have succumbed to Ben's gentle prodding but Qui-Gon trusted Ben. Ben pulled his senses back into himself feeling guilt over his manipulation of the Jedi Master and the abuse of his trust but he had seen no other way.
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Qui-Gon awoke with the dawn. He lay in his bed, watching the world become alight with the flame of the suns. The golden light began to cascade over the tree tops giving the Border Forest a glowing halo of fire and for the moment he could almost forget the Dark Border that lay beyond. Soon after he woke Qui-Gon herd noises coming from the kitchen. He rose in search of breakfast.
He wandered into the kitchen to find Ben hard at work preparing a cooked breakfast.
"Can I help?"
"No, please sit down." Ben didn't turn around when he addressed the Jedi and Qui-Gon detected a note of strain in his voice. Qui-Gon crossed the small kitchen area to stand behind Ben.
"Are you alright?" Taking the other man's arm he gently turned his so they were face to face. He gasped in surprise. A dark bruise marred Ben's cheek and there was a nasty cut above his eyebrow. The Jedi began to bring his arm up to heal the minor wound but he was stopped by Ben's grip on his wrist.
"Who did that?"
"No one." Ben's eyes betrayed his misery. "I fell." Ben quickly turned back to the cooking food, ignoring Qui-Gon. "Please sit down." Just then he heard footsteps approaching and then there was another man entering the kitchen.
"My lord, this is my stepbrother, Bruck." Qui-Gon bowed to the other man noticing the startling differences between the two men. Bruck was taller than Ben and had long white hair. His skin, like his hair, was pale, white in comparison to Ben's tanned body. With his Jedi senses Qui-Gon also detected a faint taint in his aura, nothing too obvious but there was definitely something there, shaded away from everything else.
"Ah yes, my brother said we had an honoured guest last night when I returned home. I hope I didn't disturb you." Qui-Gon shook his head; he did not miss the flash of jealousy that flashed across Bruck's blue eyes or the anger that accompanied it. Nor did he miss the mocking tone that he used when he referred to his step brother. "Good, please sit down with me, I am no chef so I leave the cooking to Ben who is quite exceptional." Qui-Gon sat down with Bruck talking to him about the army's activities. He spoke often without giving anything away. He noticed Ben's absence, as soon as breakfast was set on the table he had left, going out into the yard. Qui-Gon felt that the room was oddly darker with out him in it.
"How did the two of you come to living together?" He asked in a casual tone but he was anxious to hear the answer. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know but he felt that he should, between the man's aura and the warnings in the Force he had deduced very quickly where the bruise on Ben's cheek had come from. He had only know Ben for little over a day but he felt protective of the youth and so he felt compelled to ask.
"My father and his mother were married for a short time. She died when Ben was seven, leaving him in my father's care."
"And Ben's father?"
"Died when Ben was five, my own father died last year, Ben returned here shortly after leaving the army."
"The army?"
"Yes, he never made much of himself though, he is still a weed like he was as a child." Bruck was easily ten years older than Ben and Qui-Gon wondered at their past relationship.
"I think I may go out for my morning meditation." Qui-Gon walked away from the cabin, making sure it was still within view he sat down to meditate and watch. Bruck had been very polite to him during their morning meal but it had seemed so fake. At that moment Bruck came out of the Cabin, approaching Ben from behind. When he was ten yards away he stopped and look around him,
/Checking for me./
Believing Qui-Gon was nowhere around, Bruck began shouting at his stepbrother. Qui-Gon was too far away to hear what was being said but he suspected he was the cause of Bruck's outburst. His suspicions were confirmed when a wave of jealousy and anger hit him, its source was clearly Bruck, but what did surprise the Jedi was the sympathy which rolled off of Ben and reached out to Bruck. Ben said nothing as he was laid into for no reason other than to show compassion to another person. He took the verbal abuse, showing no signs of defence. The one-sided argument ended when Bruck stormed back inside the house, slamming the door behind him.
The gentle peace that Qui-Gon had felt upon arriving and meeting Ben was shattered. He wished he could do something but he could not linger there much longer, he had to meet up with the Jedi council before they began their southward journey for winter. But the Force had led him to this isolated home among the trees. Frustration gripped his mind for an instant. If only he knew what needed to be done.
/I will see how things progress and if necessary I'll take him with me./
What if he won't leave?
Qui-Gon didn't even want to think about the possibility. Ben had been terrified last night when he had kissed him but it had felt so right. He could not imagine being without the quiet thoughtful man. After a time Ben had come out of his shell and the Jedi was delighted to find a keen intellect and a wicked sense of humour. He didn't want to lose what they had found together. They were meant to be together, the Force was practically telling them that and Qui-Gon was sure that Ben felt it too.
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Later that afternoon Ben was once again working in the yard, and Bruck was in the barn tending to the few animals the two men owned. This was the ideal opportunity to approach Ben. The closeness they had built up seemed to have vanished but Qui-Gon was not deceived by the surface feelings he could sense.
/Or maybe I'm just plain stubborn./
"Ben, may I speak with you?" Ben whirled around, clearly surprised by the appearance of the older man. He glanced over at the barn, nervously.
"Of course, my Lord. How may I help?"
"I was hoping you would let me help you."
"I'm sorry, my Lord, I don't understand." Ben began to fidget, growing more nervous with every passing second.
"Ben, what happened? I thought we had become friends." Qui-Gon's proximity made Ben nervous, he kept glancing over to the barn where he knew Bruck was. He leaned forward, whispering to the older man.
"Please, Qui-Gon, not now." Not daring to remain any longer, Ben stepped away heading towards the house. Qui-Gon didn't let his irritation take over. Instead he followed the other man, determined to get an answer one way or another.
"Ben, please let me help you."
"What can you do?" his voice held the dull tone of inevitable failure.
"Leave with me."
"Don't you think I've tried that? He always finds me. He has allies, powerful allies."
"Don't you feel it? There is a connection between us. I don't believe I could live without it now that I have found it. I don't understand it but I know what it is, it's love. I love you Ben and I want you. Let me help you." Tears streamed down Ben's face, Qui-Gon's confession reaching deep within him to the part he had hidden away.
"I love you too." The power of his emotions caused Ben's voice to come out in a harsh whisper, "but how can that help?"
"You have lost your faith," Qui-Gon said. Ben didn't answer so he continued. "I can feel the Force all around us, this love is born from it, it is light itself. It is meant to be. The Force will protect us if we follow it. Please give me the chance to prove it to you, to restore your faith." The conviction in Qui-Gon's voice stopped Ben's flow of tears but it left the ever present sadness.
"I don't understand how but I know I love you, Qui-Gon. It may be the will of the Force, it could be fate, but even if it is I am still afraid." A gentle sigh escaped Ben's lips. "I will stay here, the dark is close by and Bruck is strong because of it. He's half Jedi you know?" The Jedi Master didn't try and hide his surprise, he hadn't sensed any thing from Bruck which perhaps showed how strong he was, at least in this place. Ben turned away, gazing out into the deep forest. His voice dropped as he remembered a time long ago. "His father was a Jedi, although I question his allegiances to the light; a fallen Jedi perhaps. But what do I know, the son of a simple farmer."
"And a soldier from what I hear." Qui-Gon saw a smile blossom across Ben's face before he schooled his features back into a neutral mask.
"Yes, I was a soldier, but I returned here hoping Bruck was different, that I could help him and in my ignorance I have become a prisoner in my own family home. These are the things that the Force has given me. I see no light here, it is obscured by there trees and I am unable to pass beyond them so you will forgive me if I do not believe that love will save me. The dark is too powerful and for now I am to weak to fight it." Ben strode away from the Jedi Master. Qui-Gon couldn't bring himself to follow, he could now feel the darkness that surrounded Ben, but he could also sense that the darkness was not part of the younger man.
/He said for now. That means there is still hope deep within Ben and hope is definitely of the light./ Qui-Gon returned to his meditation determined to show Ben what he already knew.
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He spent the evening with Bruck, learning all he could about the man, his strengths, his weaknesses and ways that he could exploit them. He retired for the night confident in his ability to free Ben from this man.
It was late when he was once again woken by noises. He rose, hoping to stop Bruck before he went too far. As he reached the door that led into the corridor a loud crash from the main living area broke the silence of the night. Fearing the worst Qui-Gon rushed out of his little room.
The Jedi Master halted when he reached the other part of the cabin; the sight and the feeling of darkness that emanated from what felt like everything stunned him. The room was completely destroyed. All the furniture was turned over, bits of plates and glass were scattered all over the floor and amongst them lay splinters of wood. A sharp gust of wind swept through the cabin through the open door extinguishing all the candles that remained alight. He carefully walked over the debris to close the door. As he lowered the latch he heard a muffled sob from the corner of the room.
As Qui-Gon squinted into the darkness, the silver light of the moon revealed a figure huddled on the floor. Terror radiated from him in waves. The sandy hair revealed the figure to be Ben. Slowly he walked forward not wishing to frighten him any more than he already was. When the boy made no move he crouched down by his side.
"Ben?"
Ben's face was hidden in shadow but Qui-Gon could see the mottled bruises on his arm and neck. Qui-Gon sent his Force sense outwards, searching for the tainted aura of Bruck. All he could feel was the Border Forest and the night creatures that lived there. They were alone, for now.
"He has gone, Ben. Let me help you." He didn't get an answer but Ben reached forward grasping Qui-Gon's sleeping tunic. The Jedi's hands came up smoothing over the tight grip. He gently held the younger man's hands between his own.
"It will be alright" Qui-Gon gathered Ben into his arms picking him up off the floor. Ben shivered in his arms as he carried him over the devastated furniture. Ben's sobs reduced to quiet hiccups as he snuggled into the reassuring warmth.
Gently Qui-Gon put Ben down on his bed. He left the youth for a moment to light a candle. The orange glow from the tiny flame flickered across the room and Ben's face. There were streaks of tears on his cheeks and his green eyes glittered with unshed tears.
"Sssh, it'll be alright. Lie down." Qui-Gon helped Ben under the covers, they would have to leave in the morning, but for now Ben needed some rest. Qui-Gon rose only to be stopped by a white hand gripping his wrist.
"Don't leave me." The desperate behind the plea wrenched at the Jedi's heart.
"I won't." Ever. He added to himself. "Sleep now, we'll leave at dawn if you are willing to come."
"I'll go with you." A ghost of a smile swept over Ben's lips as he drifted into an uneasy sleep. Qui-Gon began packing, the suns would rise soon and they must be on their way by first light.
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When the first touches of light came to the forest Qui-Gon Jinn was ready. He had packed up his things and salvaged some food from the kitchen. He now stood on the porch waiting for Ben to finish collecting his things and join him.
Bruck had not returned during the night but Qui-Gon was ready for him if he did reappear. There was more to Bruck than what met the eye. And even though Qui-Gon was a full Jedi Master he was weary. Despite knowing there was still something not right around them Qui-Gon was determined to succeed in helping Ben escape. He loved the youth, of that he was sure, even if he couldn't understand how. And now he knew that Ben loved him and wanted to be with him. All that stood between them was this place.
Ben appeared on the porch next to Qui-Gon carrying a small bag.
"This is all I want." Ben look around sadly, at what had once been his family home, a place of happiness. And what had later it had become his prison. But now he was free. Ben looked at the tall Jedi and loved filled his senses. This was right, what he felt was right and leaving was right. He inhaled deeply, savouring the crisp morning air and a small, happy smile adorned his lips and contentment showed in his eyes.
"Let's go."
He held out his hand to Qui-Gon who took it with gentle strength. Ben led the Jedi around the cabin to the barn where the animals were kept. Within it were two beautiful horses, one black, and the other white. They were stark contrasts and total opposites to each other but they seemed to go together so well.
/Like us./
"Thunder and Lightning."
Qui-Gon didn't need to be told which animal was which. Their beauty and power shone from within and their colouring gave them their names. Ben began pulling tack from hook and putting saddles on the pair of horses.
"I brought them with me when I left the army. Lightning is faster, but Thunder, with his sturdier build, is more suited for battle." He looked away from the stall to see blue eyes as he spoke next. "Bruck's been riding Thunder."
Ben finished putting the tack on the horses in silence; the Jedi watched his gentle but confident movements from the barn door. Both men jumped when a sound of glass shattering broke the relative calm, breaking them both from their hypnotic actions. Ben tensed in fear, glancing towards the larger man, desperate to see reassurance.
"What was that?"
"I'll go and see."
"Take Thunder with you."
Qui-Gon mounted the horse and trotted him out to the front of the cabin. The wooden building was in flames. Fire licked at the windows and roof, burning through them, setting the whole building alight. Qui-Gon looked on with horror, his paralysis broken by the startled cry from the Barn. Turning his horse around Qui-Gon hurried back to Ben only to find him trapped in the barn, the doors obscured by fire. Bruck stood watching with a torch in his hand, admiring his handy work and feeding off Ben's fear.
"Ben, jump." There was nothing Qui-Gon could do as he watched the flames grow higher devouring the wooden structure. "Bruck, why?"
"I won't let him go."
Out of the corner of his eye Qui-Gon saw Ben mount Lightning. Turning fully he was in time to see Ben urge the horse into a gallop heading straight for the burning exit. As the horse leaped into the air the wall of flames seemed to shrink back, making a gap for the mare and her rider. Bruck was furious at Ben's escape and he began screaming his anger at the retreating forms of Ben and Qui-Gon.
The two men raced off, side by side, away from the burning cabin and Bruck's hateful words. The flames fed on the little dwelling, cleansing it of the Darkness, which had choked it for so long.
"Damn you Ben, I'll find you."
Ben ignored the threats as he rode away next to the man who he loved and who had the power to set him free.