Tuesday Afternoon

The next day Principal Kelly drove to work in a rent a car. A car that was not in the best of condition. A rent a car who's exhaust pipe made an explosion of smoke every time it stopped. This caught the eye of a police cruiser who pulled Kelly over. After half an hour of arguing Kelly was forced to head over to a garage. This was why Kelly didn't make it into work until 12:30 in the afternoon. His arrival was announced with a huge boom!

"Cool car Principal Kelly!" Todd chirped. "Man I wish I had a car like that!"

"What happened to my life?" Kelly moaned as he opened the door to the car and it fell off.

Kelly walked to his office. "Dorothy remind me never to rent a car from the Wrecks R' Us place again," He told her. "No matter how cheap." He walked into his office.

And came face to face with his missing garden gnome. It was sitting at his desk wearing fake glasses and a tie. "Wonderful," He grumbled. "So what happened this morning? Anyone else quit?"

"No," Dorothy nodded. "But there was another fight in the halls just a half an hour ago."

"Oh no the Brotherhood and the Institute nuts are at it again!" Kelly groaned.

"No this time neither one of them was involved," Dorothy told him. "For once."

"You're kidding?" Kelly looked at her. "An altercation happened without any members of those two insane groups being involved? This day is looking up. What happened?"

"I think you'd better hear it for yourself," Dorothy sighed. "I'll send them in."

Two cheerleaders walked in. "Faith Mitchell and Tiffany Bayers?" Kelly looked at them. "I'd never thought I'd see either of you for fighting so what happened?" Both girls started chattering at once. "One at a time! Faith, you first."

"Well," Faith pouted. "I found out that she stole my routine for the cheerleading competition!"

"I did not!" Tiffany pouted. "You stole my routine!"

"Did not!" Faith snapped.

"Did too!" Tiffany snapped back.

"Girls please," Kelly said. "I mean that's a pretty silly thing to be fighting over."

"Silly?" Faith glared at him.

"It shows what you know!" Tiffany growled. "The winner of that so called silly competition gets a two thousand dollar scholarship!"

"Why bother? With the grades you get you'll be lucky to graduate high school," Faith snickered.

"Oh this from the girl who thinks the Marshall Plan was a diet fad," Tiffany snapped.

"I'm not the one who asked my teacher in front of everyone who won the Civil War!" Faith snapped.

"At least I wasn't voted 'Most Likely to Graduate High School in Seven Years!'"

"Well it beats being voted 'Mattress Queen!'"

"You take that back!"

"Make me sister!"

"Bring it on!"

"Oh it's been brought on!"

Soon the two cheerleaders were slapping each other silly. Kelly tried to stop them but ended up getting accidentally socked in the jaw. He collapsed on the floor.

"Oops," Faith gulped.

"See what you did!" Tiffany snapped as they stood over Kelly. "It's all your fault!"

"My fault?! Why you little…" And the slap fight continued, with both combatants ignoring Kelly completely.

Kelly regained consciousness about an hour later. "Oh my head," He muttered to himself. He looked around and found himself in the nurse's office. "What happened?"

"You got hit," Mrs. Dooney, the school nurse told him in a voice that was way too chipper. "Here, have a popsicle!" she handed him one. "It's grape flavored!"

"I'd rather have an aspirin," He grumbled setting it aside.

"I don't know if I'm allowed to hand those out," Mrs. Dooney frowned. "I have some saltine crackers if you'd like."

"I'm not a student Mrs. Dooney," Kelly grumbled.

"Oh that's right. My mistake. Would you like these purple pills or the red pills?" She handed him some. "I forget what they're called. The purple pills make you happy. I take them all the time!"

"Really," Kelly looked at her. "I would never have guessed. And what do the red pills do?"

"I don't know," She said. "Let's try them shall we? Bottoms up!" She downed them in one gulp. "Need something to wash them down with. I still have some gin left. Want some?"

"Uh no thanks. I'm feeling much better now," Kelly got up. "Oh look at the time. Gotta go!" He got out of there in a hurry.

"Lovely lady," Kelly grumbled to himself as he left. "Really seems to care. About what I have no idea!" He hadn't gotten far down the halls when he heard a familiar voice.

"Zippy?" He heard Todd's voice. "Here Zippy!"

"Tolensky," Kelly groaned. "What are you doing out of class this time?"

"I'm looking for someone," Todd said matter of factly.

"Okay who are you looking for?" Kelly asked, even though he dreaded the answer.

"Zippy. He's a new student. I was showing him around but I can't find him," Todd said. "He's wearing a tuxedo. Real easy to spot. Have you seen him?"

"No," Kelly's headache was getting worse. "No I haven't. Tolensky just get to class, I'll see you and your lunatic friends in detention later."

Kelly walked away. "I am better off not knowing," He said to himself. "I am better off not knowing. Now what?" He heard two more students talking in the hallway.

"Why does that thing after me?" Kurt grumbled as he as Scott rounded the corner.

"Who knows? I can't believe those lunatics stole that…" Scott turned around and stopped talking. "Hi Principal Kelly."

"Stole what Mr. Summers?" Kelly growled folding his arms.

"Nothing," Scott gulped.

"Really?" Kelly raised an eyebrow. "Do you have anything to say Mr. Wagner?"

"No," Kurt gulped, shaking his head.

"Just get to class!" Kelly snapped. He made sure they left. "That's it! They are up to something! I'll talk to them in detention later! But first I have to find some aspirin."

A few hours later Kelly had recovered. He went to the detention hall. He was halfway there when he heard the shouting. He ran into the room and found the biggest mess he had ever seen in a classroom.

"WHAT HAPPENED HERE?" Kelly yelped. The kids were at their desks, some of them with guilty looks on their faces, particularly Jean, Scott and the other Institute kids. The Brotherhood was sitting there as if nothing had happened. Silly string was everywhere. But even more incredibly, half the room was covered in ice.

"They started a silly string war!" Todd pointed to the Institute kids.

"We did not!" Kitty snapped.

"Forget the silly string! What happened to the room?" Kelly nearly slid on the ice that was already starting to melt. "Where did all this ice come from?"

"What ice?" Bobby said blankly.

"The ice covering half the room!" Kelly snapped.

"I dunno," Lance shrugged. "It was like that when we got here."

"Yeah," Scott said nervously. "Maybe the pipes froze or something."

"Yeah good answer!" Several students piped up instantly.

"I think you should get an expert or something in here," Fred said.

"Yeah those pipes have been acting crazy all year," Evan said.

"You really expect me to believe that? Frozen pipes my eye! How did this happen?" He asked the teacher on detention duty.

The teacher had a glazed look in his eyes. "Every thing is fine. The pipes just froze. Nothing happened. Everything is fine. Everything is fine…"

"Everything is not fine!" Kelly snapped. "Look at this place! It looks like Antarctica in here! All it needs is a penguin! What…?"

At that moment a penguin did appear. It waddled out from behind the desk. "Wak?" It looked up at Kelly and then proceeded to nibble on his shoelaces.

Kelly's jaw was wide open. He looked at the Institute and Brotherhood members in shock. He stumbled away muttering. "I don't wanna know. I don't wanna know."