A/N - The third chapter. We're going to start getting a little weird here. I suck at writing long chapters, so bear with me. Okay?
Disclaimer – Anything that is well developed and thought out, isn't mine. Harry Potter belongs to JK Rowling and Warner Bros. South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker. Sailormoon is copyright Kodansha and Naoko Takeuchi, and Toei. Blink 128 belong to themselves.
~*~
"The Usagi/Cartman Problem"
"You guys…seriously…its just… so…gay!" Cartman breathed, sounding out of breath. It was because he was reading. An actual book, not the TV guide. Butters, Kyle, Stan and Eric had all decided to participate in the Harry Potter quiz contest. Since the prize was so grand, what did they have to lose? Five hours ago, it seemed like a good idea. Now…they were beginning to regret it.
"Oh come on fellas, it's just a little readin'," Butters said enthusiastically, turning a page. He was three quarters of the way through the second book. Kyle looked up groggily from his halfway mark through the first. Stan glared at him from chapter eight. Cartman groaned from page two. "Well, if I tell you what happens, you won't do as well on the quiz!" Butters said, not looking up.
"I guess he's right," Kyle said, still reading, "We made our moms buy us the books and enter us, the least we could do is try." He was right. They ad all called their parents and told them to buy the Harry Potter books for them. Their mothers gladly obliged, so happy their little boys were actually reading. They were a little put down about the part with the contest, but anything to keep them away from that damned Okama GameSphere.
"I can't pronounce half these things! What are they? Why am I reading this shit!" Cartman screamed, and threw his book across the room, smacking the wall. For the fifth time.
"What page are you on, Cartman?" Kyle asked. He figured he hadn't gotten too far, anything seemingly educational was Cartman's weak point. Even educational television was avoided by the fat asshole.
"Two," Cartman replied angrily. He retrieved the book, and growled at it, "I'll make you eat your parents." Kyle giggled. "Shut up, Jew!" he yelled, and began reading again.
An hour later, the boys were getting restless. Kyle had almost finished the first book, while Butters was reading the back cover of the third. Cartman had actually made it to page twenty. Stan was dancing around the room, celebrating the halfway point. Mrs. Broflovski walked in with some snacks to cheer the boys up.
"I'm so proud of you boys. Reading for once! Even if it's for a contest, reading can be fun!" She said setting the snacks down and walking back out. Cartman practically jumped on the plate.
"Sweet food! Oh yes...appetizers…snackey cakes, cheesy poofs," he drooled, shoving food into his face. The other boys stared, mouths open. But not because of Cartman shoving food into his mouth. That was perfectly normal practice. The fact that half of Cartman's body wasn't visible due to a large hole was the point of shock. The hole moved back a bit, flashed and was gone. Sitting where it was, however, was a girl with long blonde hair. With funny hair things on her head. In a sailor school uniform.
"Holy shit, dude."
~*~
In Tokyo, it was after school. Everyone was meeting at the temple for a study session. Usagi, however, was fashionably late. A fashionable forty-five minutes late. Everyone was straining to study. Except Ami. She was researching the status of the time-space leakage. It was increasing fairly rapidly. She had seen an outburst a little while ago. From her dimension through the warp connecting them to South Park. She probably expected it to be a small object, since the flare had been small. However, sine the warp is just growing, the small thing could be something significant. A growing warp can e quite temperamental, and throwing her scales off balance. She was awoken out of her daze by a loud giggle.
"Hey! Stooooop! No! No!" shrieked Makoto, as Minako tickled her. She was rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically. Minako was leaning above her, fingers wiggling menacingly. She started to swoop down when Ami's stern voice broke the giggly pleasure.
"What exactly are you doing? This is study time!" she said, looking at the pair. She cast her cold glare at them, piercing happy thoughts. If one thing pissed her off, it was people not studying seriously. They all wanted to get into high school, and they needed to pass the exams to accomplish that. And they only way the rest of the lot was going to get it, was to study. And study a lot.
"But we ARE studying, Ami!" Minako said cheerfully. "We're studying for science. The stimulant is me tickling Makoto. Her response is laughing. So I'm studying cause and effects of stimulants!" She finished, holing up her index finger importantly. Ami took a glace at Minako's science book.
"The book means stimulant drugs, Minako. Not tickling."
"Oh. My mistake. I guess the warp must have taken my brain, and switched it with a balloon. So I'm an air head now!" Minako said. Ami, Rei, and Makoto groaned. 'What a pathetic attempt at a joke…' they thought. It had been an hour. Usagi was still not there.
"Well, I'm sick of waiting. I'm going to contact Usagi!" Rei said, slamming her fist on the table. She raised her wrist and opened the communicator watch. She signaled for Usagi's watch to respond. A voice, sounding much like Luna's gave her a response:
"I'm sorry, but the communicator connection can't be established right now. Either the user is out of range or they have a voice mailbox that has not been set up yet. Please either try a different form
of communication or try again later."
Rei sat dumbfounded by the response The other girls gave her a funny look. Makoto took out her watch, and tried the same. A rather irritated Luna voice spoke:
"I already TOLD you that this communicator is out of reach! Try again later, or use the damn phone!"
Makoto raised and eyebrow. "That was odd," she said, shifting on the floor. Ami was busy with her mini-supercomputer and a small wire connecting to the watch.
"Whatcha doin'?" Minako asked curiously. She watched Ami put the tip of the wire into the watch. The other end was hooked up to the computer. Like a Game Boy link.
"I'm attempting to trace the signal. This here's the map of the four dimensions leaking," she pointed to a large picture on the screen. "A line will show up starting here, and tracing to the spot where Usagi is. Hopefully, it will work," she said. She pushed the small button, summoning a connection from Usagi. A small flashing dot appeared on the computer screen. A flashing line protruded from it, following a small strip leaning towards…the South Park dimensional area of the map. The line suddenly bounded back off the edge of the dimension back to the watch.
"It took you long enough. She's not here," the irritated Luna voice from the watch said. Everyone looked at it with a shocked expression. Usagi was gone. To South Park through the leaking dimensional warp.
"Why couldn't she go to a better area? Like the one where Tom is!" Minako complained, sitting down with a huff. Everyone groaned and shook their heads.
~*~
Everyone stared at the girl sitting in the middle of the room. Even Cartman looked up from the food. What he saw was better than any food. His jaw dropped open as well. He stared at the pretty girl, wondering who she was, or how she got here.
"Hey…who the hell are you?" Stan asked, walking up to the girl.
"I would ask the same, but I'm not as rude as you, kid," Usagi said, eyeing the kid. She had no idea where she was, or how she got there.
"Well, can you tell us your name at least? Please?" Kyle walked up and asked, looking at the girl. She was pretty, and had a pin in the middle of her boy, shaped like a heart.
"Tsukino Usagi, and you?" she said, waving. She looked around at the quaint little house she was in. It was nice, and the family seemed to be Jewish.
"I'm Kyle. This is Stan, Cartman, and that's Butters," Kyle said, pointing to each boy respectively. "It's nice to meet you...uh...Tsukino?"
"Oh no…It's Usagi. Where I live, last names come first!" She said , proud to actually know something these boys didn't.
"Well, miss, would you mind if you stayed at my house? They're plenty of food, and my mom will surely let you stay," Cartman said, walking up to the strange girl. He found her quite pretty, and having her in the house would make him look so much better than the other guys. Maybe she'd have read those damn Harry Potter books too! Plus she was very pretty.
Usagi looked at the chubby, in her opinion, boy. He seemed so cute with the little grin he had on. "Alright then, I guess. Can I tell you all something?" she asked, gathering them closer. She knelt down, meeting their height. "Okay, look. I'm actually a Sailor Senshi. Sailormoon, to be exact. I don't know how I got here, but it's bound to have something to do with a dimensional warp. I believe my cat has switched with one of yours. I'll try my best to put everything right, but I'm going to have to ask you not to tell anyone. Alright?" she finished, looking at their adorable shocked faces. She smiled. "Well, Cartman, I guess we'll be going to your house then?"
Cartman stood up and ushered her out the door, taking his books with him. Winking at the other guys, he closed the door behind them.
Upon arrival at the Cartman residence, Cartman banged open the door and led Usagi inside. He yelled to his mom.
"Mooom, I found a Sailor Senshi, can I keep her?"
"Sure, hon."
"Sweet."
~*~
A/N: More next time…sorry for the wait on this!!