Who's In Charge?

Diary of Ayeka, Princess of Jurai

Thirtieth day of June

Well, now that I've had breakfast to think things over (I made eggs and roasted apples), I can safely say that many of these items will be put to good use. Using my knack for this sort of thing, I have decided how to use these items to the best possible limit, or else how to divide them amongst ourselves.

9 bars of soap = 4 for each, 1 to be shared; hygiene

5 towels = 2 for each, 1 to be used for cleaning

4 washcloths = 2 for each; cleaning or hygiene

3 toothbrushes = 1 for each, 1 for emergencies

7 tubes of toothpaste = 3 for each, 1 for emergencies

3 hairbrushes = 2 for each, 1 for either emergencies or sifting

2 rolls of dental floss = half of box for each, other half for sewing thread and rope

2 pairs of small scissors = 1 for each, cutting skins or killing small animals

2 pairs of large scissors = 1 for each, cutting or killing

1 fingernail clipper = must be shared

2 unbroken mirrors = 1 for each; shaving, etc.

8 broken mirrors = pieces to be used as weapons or cutting tools

6 packets of women's razors = 3 packets for each

2 packets of men's razors = 1 packet for each if women's razors become dull

8 canisters of women's shaving cream = 4 for each

2 canisters of men's shaving cream = 1 each when women's runs out

(Note: Shaving shall not occur more than 2 times a week, or less than 6 times a month)

7 meters of thick rope = used to secure house, perhaps build a raft

12 meters of thin rope = used to tie wood in house together

3 maps = determine where location is

1 compass = determine where location is

3 boxes of nails = used on the house

2 hammers = 1 each, used on house

1 fresh saw = to be shared, for house

4 slabs of molding wax = 2 each, used to weld misc. objects

2 battery-powered lanterns = used during night to alert ships and planes

8 signal flares = 4 each. 1 shall be used at the first day of every other week; 1 shall be saved for an airplane or ship

3 blankets = 1 each; for bed

2 small pillows = 1 each, for bed

2 boxes of crackers = 1 box each, for emergencies only

1 jug of water = to be shared. for emergencies only

1 canteen = given to me by Ryoko

1 box of spaghetti = to be used sparingly

1 box of oatmeal = to be used sparingly

2 boxes of pens and pencils = for Ryoko

1 manual pencil sharpener = to be shared

1 blank diary = for Ryoko to use

1 packet of men's underwear = to be divided amongst ourselves (emergencies)

1 packet of women's underwear = " "

2 packets of socks = 1 packet each

3 large T-shirts = 1 each, third to be cut for clothes

3 pairs of blue jeans = 1 pair each, third to be cut

Miscellaneous clothing = divided evenly

Several ounces of packing straw and Styrofoam = used to help fire or protect valuables

Several sheets of bubble paper = used to protect valuables

Wood from the crates = for firewood or the house

Now it is up to me to use these items to the best of their ability. I hope I am suited for the job (I'm sure Ryoko isn't!).

Sincerely,

Lady Ayeka, Crown Princess of Jurai Royal Family!

Diary of Tenchi's Immortal Lover and Scourge of Space--

The dreaded Space Pirate Ryoko!

Long live the Great and Powerful Ryoko!

Men desire her gorgeous features but only one man has her heart!

Cheers!! Ryoko Forever!!

That Ayeka thinks she can boss me around. Huh, I'll show her. She did okay with all the stuff I found, but now she feels like she's done her job, and I have to do everything else. I don't have a problem with working, as long as I'm not the only one. That royal (censored content) isn't doing a lick of work; says she's "supervising" or some crap. Huh, supervising my (censored content)! Well, I'll do my fair share--then I'll see how she likes it! Ha!!

Magnificently yours,

The wonderful, beautiful, talented, loveable, and all-around kick-butt angel of Hell,

Me!! :o)

After placing most of their items inside the storage bin (which, by the way, had also been destroyed by the hurricane, so a new one had to be rebuilt), the girls more or less set about in restoring their cabin to its former glory. With the addition of several new tools and items, this task was growing easier and easier, but as things usually went, not even the simplest task could be approached well.

"Hey! What are you doing?! You're supposed to tie that rope around those logs so they'll secure easier! We don't want to lose them to another wind now, do we?"

"Grrr… why don't you come down here and secure them yourself??"

"Well, you know that I am a supervisor! I am working just as hard as you are, if not even more so!"

"Go swallow a porcupine, you hag! I'm not moving another inch until you come down here and chip in!"

"Why… you insubordinate cretin!! I'll 'chip in', all right!"

"Hey! You stupid wench! You're cutting those branches wrong! You're supposed to cut like that, see?"

"I don't see the difference! And besides, what does it matter?"

"Because those branches fit into those cracks over there! And you're cutting them so they won't be able to fit!"

"Who cares?! I'm cutting them the way I think they should be cut!"

"Grrrr… here, let me put that saw to good use!"

"Ack!! Put that away!!"

"Hey, hurry up and lift that box! It's not that heavy, now!"

"Ooohh…!!! Why don't you come over here and help me, huh? Jeez, this thing weighs almost as much as you do!!"

"I BEG YOUR PARDON!?"

"ACK!! What are you doing?! You're wasting nails!"

"I am not! I'm putting them where they're supposed to go!!"

"You're messing everything up! They're all bent and out of shape! Of course, what else was I to expect out of you?!"

"Oooh, why you--!"

"ACK, watch where you're swinging that hammer!"

"Hey, put down those broken pieces of glass!"

"Insubordinate cretin!"

"Lousy flea-infested mongrel!"

"Obnoxious back-stabber!"

"Cactus-hugger!"

"Wimp!"

"Degenerate!"

"Slut!"

"Whore!"

"Jezebel!"

"Judas!"

"Freak of nature!"

"Snot-nosed brat!"

"Demon!"

"Witch!"

And so, all efforts to be civil crashed and burned--and yet, through some fantastic miracle, the house was completed and the SOS system was finished and even improved upon. But now, the girls were right back where they started: square one, when they did nothing but insult each other and fight and argue as always.

It's good the way some things never change.