High Jumping Highjinx
A short parody
By: Afro Moogle
All characters are entitled to their respective owners; I just whip them
together with a 5-speed blender on setting #6.
Objects in () are Author's notes; there will be many as this is the author's
first fanfic.
Kain was busy trying to get the World Record for High Jumps, a Record that
imposter Reina set….
"If only she wasn't a woman… That Onna…" Kain says to himself during warm ups.
Giving steely-eyed glares towards Reina warming up on the other side of the
field Kain concentrated.
Random eek's and yeek's are heard from fan girls as Blonde haired and bodacious
Kain makes his way to the High Jump stands. Many tongue's lolled from Reina's
fan club, she had chosen a one-piece swimsuit.
ONNA!!! ONNA!!!! Must…Not…Look… Kain thinks, concentrating on not getting a
nosebleed.
Reina smirks inwardly. Oh it's so fun being a woman and watching a man squirm,
heh heh.
They both come up to their respective podiums.
"Alright ya flea bitten high jumpin' grasshoppers." The crabby voice of
Older-than-Dirt Tellah, unfortunately one of the judges's for this event. "Rules
are you two jump as high as ya can, and whoever jumps higher wins, since I don't
feel like talking anymore I'll let the other judges say their dang hellos and
whatnot, In my day we weren't so foolish as to jump so danged high…" Tellah's
voice fades away as he makes his snail pace out of the arena.
"Bah ya a crabby soul ya danged Tellah that ya are!" Came the impromptu Voice of
Cid over a loudspeaker mounted on his Enterprise.
"The names Cid, ya'll here me? Good, Ahm the judge of over 3000ft mark, if ya
don't make it past here, your not fit to hold the title!!!" Cid speaks with his
best old western accent, strangely enough a lot of people DON'T go into laughing
fits… I think they noticed that rather large cannon he's got there.
"Waaaaaazzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Comes 3D Cid, in the Highwind, high
above the Enterprise. "Names Cid too, call me Mack Daddy Cid though, it's
catchier. So while I have all you peoples attention down there, I'm judging from
five thousand, four hundred and sixty, and five eighths, up, which is the worlds
current record, jump up this high and dang, you need a medal, back to you
Tellah."
"ZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZ" Tellah snores into the mike. The crazy coot always
has naptime right when anything exciting happens…Kain thinks, wondering HOW in
the heck he got into this n the first place.
New rule when I get home, Beer is NOT the answer to all my problems… Kain thinks
to himself.
"Ahh just go and jump on 3, 1, 2, wait for it…. THREE!!" 3d Cid goes.
They both jump very suddenly; startled at the abruptness of Cid's 'Three' of
course being both accomplish jumpers they went farther than the Enterprise. It
was neck and neck up to the Highwind…. Then they went farther, but Reina started
to fall first, which means that Kain went another fraction of an inch farther!
Kain won!!!
Reina sighs as she lands on the Highwinds deck. Dang you tootsie rolls and
Twinkies, you foiled me again. Suddenly she yells out "Oh The humanity!!! WHY
did it have to be Snack Foods!!!!" and falls over in a fit of sobbing over the
fact that she ate a few extra Twinkies at dinner.
Kain just felt pure buffness.
"What? What happened? Do it again I missed it!" Came the ever-vigilant voice of
Tellah…
Everyone fell flat on the floor, anime style of course.
Author's Note: I got really tired near the end of this so it may be a bit off,
but hope ya like it, it IS my first work after all.
A short parody
By: Afro Moogle
All characters are entitled to their respective owners; I just whip them
together with a 5-speed blender on setting #6.
Objects in () are Author's notes; there will be many as this is the author's
first fanfic.
Kain was busy trying to get the World Record for High Jumps, a Record that
imposter Reina set….
"If only she wasn't a woman… That Onna…" Kain says to himself during warm ups.
Giving steely-eyed glares towards Reina warming up on the other side of the
field Kain concentrated.
Random eek's and yeek's are heard from fan girls as Blonde haired and bodacious
Kain makes his way to the High Jump stands. Many tongue's lolled from Reina's
fan club, she had chosen a one-piece swimsuit.
ONNA!!! ONNA!!!! Must…Not…Look… Kain thinks, concentrating on not getting a
nosebleed.
Reina smirks inwardly. Oh it's so fun being a woman and watching a man squirm,
heh heh.
They both come up to their respective podiums.
"Alright ya flea bitten high jumpin' grasshoppers." The crabby voice of
Older-than-Dirt Tellah, unfortunately one of the judges's for this event. "Rules
are you two jump as high as ya can, and whoever jumps higher wins, since I don't
feel like talking anymore I'll let the other judges say their dang hellos and
whatnot, In my day we weren't so foolish as to jump so danged high…" Tellah's
voice fades away as he makes his snail pace out of the arena.
"Bah ya a crabby soul ya danged Tellah that ya are!" Came the impromptu Voice of
Cid over a loudspeaker mounted on his Enterprise.
"The names Cid, ya'll here me? Good, Ahm the judge of over 3000ft mark, if ya
don't make it past here, your not fit to hold the title!!!" Cid speaks with his
best old western accent, strangely enough a lot of people DON'T go into laughing
fits… I think they noticed that rather large cannon he's got there.
"Waaaaaazzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Comes 3D Cid, in the Highwind, high
above the Enterprise. "Names Cid too, call me Mack Daddy Cid though, it's
catchier. So while I have all you peoples attention down there, I'm judging from
five thousand, four hundred and sixty, and five eighths, up, which is the worlds
current record, jump up this high and dang, you need a medal, back to you
Tellah."
"ZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZ" Tellah snores into the mike. The crazy coot always
has naptime right when anything exciting happens…Kain thinks, wondering HOW in
the heck he got into this n the first place.
New rule when I get home, Beer is NOT the answer to all my problems… Kain thinks
to himself.
"Ahh just go and jump on 3, 1, 2, wait for it…. THREE!!" 3d Cid goes.
They both jump very suddenly; startled at the abruptness of Cid's 'Three' of
course being both accomplish jumpers they went farther than the Enterprise. It
was neck and neck up to the Highwind…. Then they went farther, but Reina started
to fall first, which means that Kain went another fraction of an inch farther!
Kain won!!!
Reina sighs as she lands on the Highwinds deck. Dang you tootsie rolls and
Twinkies, you foiled me again. Suddenly she yells out "Oh The humanity!!! WHY
did it have to be Snack Foods!!!!" and falls over in a fit of sobbing over the
fact that she ate a few extra Twinkies at dinner.
Kain just felt pure buffness.
"What? What happened? Do it again I missed it!" Came the ever-vigilant voice of
Tellah…
Everyone fell flat on the floor, anime style of course.
Author's Note: I got really tired near the end of this so it may be a bit off,
but hope ya like it, it IS my first work after all.