PART FOURTEEN: SOLVING AND MAKING PROBLEMS
"I love you, Dario," sighed Riddel, snuggling up with him.
"And I love you, Lady Riddel," smiled Dario. Karsh gagged.
"You two are hopeless. Utterly hopeless." Viper beamed with joy.
"Riddel, I am glad that Dario is back with us. Are you planning to marry him anytime soon?"
"Oh, yes daddy!" blushed Riddel. Dario chuckled and scratched his neck.
"Yeah, well, only if I'm the best man!" pointed Karsh. Riddel nodded.
"But of course! And Steena will be the maid of honor!" Steena's face reddened.
"My services are yours, Lady Riddel," she said. Kid sighed.
"Man, it just ain't the same havin' you as a brother, mate," she addressed. Serge shrugged. "Don't think I've gone loony on ya, but I... well, still have feelin's for ya." Serge swallowed and Janice winced.
"Kid, babe, Serge's my boyfriend now, and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it." Kid sighed.
"Yeah, I know. Leena, Harle, Steena'n I hafta join the Lonely Hearts Club Band."
"Oh, not me," giggled Leena. Kid turned around towards her, a puzzled look on her face. As the entire gang walked away from Philadelphia, Kid couldn't help but notice that Leena and Glenn were holding hands. She grinned slyly as she leaned her head on his shoulder.
"Ahh, Leena ya shrew! Ya got yerself a right nice catch there!" she squealed. Glenn smiled.
"Yes, well... Serge felt bad for the sudden break-up, and he wanted to do something for Leena, so... Well, I sort of... 'volunteered' for the job. No regrets now, though!" The knight smiled again, and Leena kissed his cheek. She winked at Serge, silently thanking him for hooking her up with Dario's brother.
"Well, zey are 'appy at least," sighed Harle. Lucca gently clasped her hands over the jester's and tried to sympathize. "Non, it ees okay... Moi will just have to find a proper amour elsewhere." Lucca smiled sadly and gently kissed her friend's cheek.
"Hey, if I can find someone, and if Leena can find someone, then you're obviously the next in line!" Steena coughed. "Oh, uh, sorry Steena." The priestess sighed.
"Why don't you and Kid hook up, Harle?" asked a demented fanfiction writer. The two girls glared at him fiercely.
"Because I'd rather have a stick in me eye!" growled Kid.
"Becauze moi would razzer take an aceed bath!" shouted Harle. In a very rare moment of cooperation, the thief and the clown teamed up and slaughtered the evil author.
"I think I'm in love," swooned Korcha. He grinned at Kid. She blushed.
"O-oi, Korcha! Y-you wanna kick in the rear?" He scratched his head.
"N-no comment," he muttered. Kid laughed and took his elbow into hers.
"I s'pose you'll have ta do until I can find someone else of me own style!" He turned beet red, and Serge could've sworn that his sister's cheeks glowed a little more than usual.
"Ah, amore!" sighed Harle sadly. She suddenly spied Van in a straitjacket, frothing and babbling madly. Instantly, thoughts of someone just as insane and maniacal as herself flooded her mind, and love overcame the cute jester. Happily the clown skipped over to the demented artist, cooing softly as he was being wheeled across the road by Radius.
"Ooh la-la," she giggled, "vous are juzt as mad az moi!" Van glared over at Harle madly.
"Hello, Clarice!" he whispered. Harle nearly swooned.
"Ahhh, why ees it zat I alwayz fall for ze deranged uns?" Carefully, the clown took off Van's straitjacket and kissed his cheek.
"H-Harle?" he quivered. She gazed at him innocently. "D-did you just kiss me?"
"Oui."
"But why?" She giggled.
"Becauze moi becomes hopelessly inflamed whenever moi seez someone az demented az moi. And not to be rude, but vous fits ze bill quite nicely." Van grinned weakly, not knowing whether to be happy that he finally had an admirer, or horribly disturbed at Harle's offer. The clownish girl was several cards short of a full deck, to be certain, and Van never imagined ever having a girlfriend even half as deranged as Harle.
"I, ah..." Suddenly, Harle's eyes widened lustfully as she shoved Van aside. Standing from a distance, watching the entire gang with a twisted glee, was Seifer Almasy.
"Ooh la la," purred Harle, slinking over to Seifer. "Now 'ere eez a man zat makes even moi look tame and 'armless!" She giggled, and Seifer nearly screamed out in terror.
"B-back off, you witch!" he roared, pointing Hyperion at her. "I-I'm not interested!"
"Aww, haz so many yearz spent weeth Rinoa gotten you soft, mon ami?" giggled Harle. Seifer winced and slowly backed away from the maniacal jester. Van breathed a sigh of relief.
"Seifer, I owe you one," he said. Almasy nearly went berserk himself.
"G-get her off me!" he roared, trying to wriggle Harle away from him. But she was stuck; like a python constricts its prey before devouring them, so Harle was squeezing the life out of poor Seifer. To say he deserved this was almost an insult.
"Do I hear wedding bells?" giggled Riddel, and Seifer screamed.
"Oh man--get her off me! G-get her OFF!!!!"
"Not a chance!" chuckled Lucca. "This is just too precious!"
"The bus is here," said Radius suddenly. Everyone turned around to see a Greyhound bus wheel their way. The door opened, and Norris addressed the driver.
"Where are you headed?" he asked.
"New York City," replied the driver. Seeing that the vehicle was empty, Norris nodded his head and beckoned everyone to climb the bus, even Lynx, Lucca, Dario, and Seifer. Next stop: New York!