Ron found it hard to sleep that night. Lately, everything just confused him so much it was hard to concentrate on anything. He knew the reason why, though he tried to deny it. Ever since the kiss in the common room…what was that supposed to mean, anyway?
After a restless night, he woke early, just as grey morning light was shining through the window. Looking at his watch, he saw that it was six am. With a groan, he pulled his pillow over his head and tried to get back to sleep. But sleep wouldn't come. In the end he sat up in bed, with the intention of getting dressed and going down to get some breakfast…maybe do that Potions essay that was due on Wednesday. But just as he got to his feet and started rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, the door creaked open. Ron pulled back his hangings to see who it was.
"Hermione?" he whispered in shock, "What are you doing here? You're not supposed to be in here!"
Hermione gave a little jolt and turned around. Obviously she hadn't expected Ron to be awake. "You're up early," she said softly, walking over to his bed.
"Couldn't sleep,' muttered Ron as he pulled back the hangings fully. "What are you doing in here? Do you need to talk to Harry?"
"Harry?' said Hermione blankly, "no, Ron. I need to talk to you."
Ron pulled his blanket off his bed so he could make it. He didn't answer. What was he supposed to say?
"Is it okay if we go down to the common room?" said Hermione, 'only I don't want to wake up anyone else."
"Alright," said Ron. He wrapped his dressing gown around himself and let Hermione lead the way down to the common room, where fires had already been started. "What's up, then?' said Ron, sitting down in one of the armchairs. "You okay?" Hermione looked very nervous. She paced around for a short moment and then, turned to him.
"You never let me finish,' she said.
"Excuse me?' said Ron, confused. "I don't…what?"
"You never let me finish what I was saying to you, that day…remember? When you were still sick from the squid poisoning and I came to see you in your dorm."
"Oh, yeah," said Ron, trying to remember. "So…what?"
Hermione took a deep breath. "What I was trying to say, before you started yelling, was really important. See, I realised something, and I still believe in it."
Ron was a little confused. 'Did you drag me down here to remind me that I started yelling at you?"
"No, no, Ron," said Hermione. She gave him a wretched look, as if she was trying to overcome some inner conflict.
'When you fell in the lake, Ron, and the squid poisoned you, I thought…I thought…well, I was so scared."
"That was ages ago, Hermione," interjected Ron, but Hermione held up her hand.
"Pleas let me finish, otherwise I don't know if I'll be brave enough to keep on going," she said. "I was scared, for you, Ron. I was so scared. And all I could think was that, if you died, I wouldn't be able to handle it." Ron stared at Hermione. Hermione was speaking to the ground, quickly, as though she was trying to get it all out before something stopped her. He opened his mouth to say something, but thought the better of it. After a moment of silence, Hermione lifted her head and looked at him. "And then I thought…there must be a reason why this upsets me so much…and then I realised what it was…"
"Hermione," Ron started but Hermione shook her head.
"Please don't Ron!" she said in an anguished voice. "I'm sorry, but I have to say this! When you cam after me in the common room that day…I …I…"
"You kissed me," said Ron. He looked at her. She was looking so highly embarrassed he thought she might cry. He had to ask. "Why did you do that, Hermione? Why'd you kiss me and then run off?"
"I was so scared and embarrassed," she said, speaking to the ground again. "It was because you were being so nice Ron…I never thought you'd be so upset about me leaving. So I kind of…lost control. The thing is," she said, looking up at him again. "I…I don't like arguing with you. I hate fighting with you…I don't like…" she struggled to find the right words, "I like you too much to hate you," she finished quickly. Ron stared at her with his mouth open. Was Hermione saying what he thought she was? After she kissed him and ran off he didn't think it was possible, but… "What, you think I like fighting with you?' he said after a bit. "You know…after you kissed me I thought…I thought…I don't know what I thought. But when you started ignoring me after that it…it kind of got to me." Hermione lifted her head slowly but not daring to look at his eyes. "Krum was right," Ron said suddenly. He got to his feet and moved closer to her, shaking his head. "Though I hate to admit it. He was right. I was jealous. Of him…and Harry."
"Harry?' said Hermione sharply.
"Well, I suppose I thought you guys…had a thing for each other,' said Ron, blushing. "But that doesn't seem right, does it?"
"No, of course not!" said Hermione, shaking her head earnestly. "Harry? That's so ridiculous! I've only ever liked…" she stopped herself and trailed off. They drifted into silence feeling most awkward. Ron laughed after a bit. "I dunno, Hermione" he said, shaking his head at her. "We've been friends for five years, and after all we've been through…I can't be honest with you. It's like something's stopping me."
"Me too," murmured Hermione. Their eyes locked at that moment. The common room door creaked. And owl hooted outside the window.
"Do you want to be stopped?" whispered Ron.
"No," said Hermione. "I don't."
Ron reached out slowly and took her hand. "Me neither."
He couldn't take his eyes away from hers, boring into his own. Right then, all he wanted was to stand with her, holding her hand. Right then, he just wanted her to feel the same way as he did.
And she did. She must have because Hermione pulled her face up and kissed him. But this time, he wasn't surprised- he was expecting it. But he was surprised to find that he rather enjoyed it.
*
When Harry got down to breakfast that day, he found Ron and Hermione already there.
"Oh, there you are," he yawned taking a seat next to Ron. "How long have you two been up?"
"I dunno," said Ron, "I couldn't sleep."
"Me neither," said Hermione. They exchanged a glance, which Harry didn't notice.
"How come you didn't wake me up?" Harry said giving Ron a gentle punch on the shoulder. Ron shrugged. "Sorry, mate. Thought you might want to sleep."
The Weasley twins, by nature late risers, came bounding down the marble staircase, nearly flattening a few Slytherin girls emerging from their dungeon common room and skipped over to the breakfast table. As usual, they had to make a big entrance.
"Morning, children,' said Fred breezily, dropping into a seat opposite Ron. George seated himself next to him. "So what's the buzz?"
"I'm tired," said Harry, with a yawn.
"Anything else?" said George.
"I'm hungry too," Harry said, pouring himself some cereal. "You two look happy this morning."
"Well," said George as he poured a glass of milk for himself, "We just happened to see something very interesting in the common room this morning."
Ron and Hermione froze and looked up at George. He winked at them.
'Interesting?' said Ron, in a would-be casual voice. "What do you mean, um, George?"
"Ah, you probably wouldn't be interested," said Fred teasingly, grinning at them,
"Yes we would," said Hermione quickly. "I was in the common room this morning, and I didn't see anything."
"Well, you know," said Fred, "before you go into the common room you should probably check if there's anyone in there first."
"Ah, she was probably concentrating on something else," said George. 'Still it was careless of them not to notice us in the common room when they came in, eh Fred?'
"Right on George." He winked at the two of them as well. Ron and Hermione stared back, open-mouthed. Fred and George both cackled as they pushed their chairs back. George tousled his younger brother's hair affectionately. "Take care, Romeo!" he said, and the twins walked off, still sniggering. Harry watched them go. "Wow, they're even weirder than usual today," he said.
"Yeah, I'll say," said Ron grumpily. Hermione looked quite ill.
"I can't do this," she muttered.
'Huh?' said Ron. Hermione, tears welling in her eyes suddenly, looked up at him.
"I can't do this Ron. I…we…we can't start something now. I mean, I'm leaving for France in a few weeks! It was stupid of us to…oh, I'm sorry, Ron!"
"Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, getting up so quickly his chair fell over. She dodged past him, however, and ran in the same direction s the twins had gone.
Harry watched her quietly. "I get the distinct feeling you two aren't telling me something," he said to Ron. Ron, looking distracted, nodded.
"Yeah, sorry mate," he said. "But it's not like I know what's going on."