1.1.1 Chapter Three: Tact Is Just Not Saying True Stuff
Deeper among the gravestones, Cordelia stopped walking and turned to the shorter girl.
"I'm sorry for the crack about being ungrateful."
Buffy looked at the Seer in surprise. "That's okay. I deserved it. The thing was pounding us. You killed him."
"Buffy, believe it or not, I know exactly how you're feeling."
The Slayer drew in a shaky breath. "I don't think you do."
"I haven't replaced you. *We* haven't replaced you. Nobody could do that."
"It isn't about that," insisted Buffy, setting aside the small sting she felt at hearing Angel and Cordelia referred to as 'we'. "Being replaced. Hell, that's what Slayers do – we die, we're replaced. It's just, if you can do … what you do, and Angel can do what he does … and if there are enough people doing that all around the world, which, let's face it, there must be, 'cause it's not like Sunnydale has an exclusive on the evil and I'm just gonna take a breath now…"
Cordelia smiled. "You need to meet Fred sometime."
Buffy took a breath. Softly, she said, "If all that *is* happening, then why I am here?"
Cordy nodded slowly. "You could have had a normal life?"
"At least, starting from now I could. I have responsibilities. A job. I have to look after Dawn. I could just kinda … turn it on over to you guys. And the rest of the … people … like you. You know?"
Cordelia shook her head. "Nope, sorry."
"No?"
"No. Know why you're here?"
"To watch while you shine stuff to death?"
The taller girl shook her head again. "Because you're who we come to when we fail, Buffy. So … it hasn't happened yet. It might. And if it does, you're the world's big gun. You're *it*. You know? We need you. We'll always need you."
Buffy gazed at her silently, then sat down heavily. There were a million thoughts racing through her brain, not the least of which was an inability to comprehend the changes in the girl standing before her. Of all the people who could have made this much sense … it was Cordelia. CordYoda. Go figure.
The Seer sat down next to her, oblivious to Buffy's wonder. "When I ran into Angel in LA, I was about ready to cave and come home. Did I ever tell you that?"
"No."
"Well, I was. My acting career or lack thereof was a disaster, I had no money, I had no friends … basically I had no clue. I didn't know where I was supposed to be or who I was. But now I do. I know exactly what my path is, and guess what? It's the same as yours." She broke off and grinned knowingly. "Ain't that a kick in the teeth?"
Despite herself, Buffy cracked a smile. "Bitch."
"Vamp-tramp," replied Cordy, smirking.
"Shiny creepy girl."
"Fashion oversight."
"Demon half-breed."
"Hobbit-sized powerhouse freak."
"Thank you, Cordelia."
The girl in question shrugged. "I'm smarter than I look."
"And yet you still choose the rocky path of goodness?"
Cordelia tilted her head airily. "And yet."
"I mean, God, Cordelia." Buffy looked at her companion with new wonder. "What's happened to you? You're a frickin' *demon*."
"I know."
"The glowy thing…?"
"Yeah, I can't control it yet. It's kind of frustrating, actually. It only seems to happen when I'm all emotional. Like somebody I lo-, care about is in danger, or I'm really angry or really happy."
"There's evil to dust when you're really happy? What kind of agency do you guys have, anyway?"
Cordelia shrugged. "No dusting involved. Just a non-lethal, low-watt kind of shining. Without Jack Nicholson."
"I can't believe you guys didn't tell us."
"Sorry about that."
"Remember when you were mad we didn't tell you Harmony was a vampire?"
"Uh-huh."
"This is *way* bigger."
Cordelia grinned. "One day, remind me to tell you the story of how it happened. Thrills, chills, and a deal so sweet the devil couldn't have turned it down. Nobody smart would have." She paused. "Meet the dumbass who did."
Buffy looked at her quietly for a moment. "It's obviously a good thing. So, I'm glad. For both your sakes."
She didn't mention his name, but the word hung in the air between them.
Finally, Cordelia spoke. "He's doing okay, you know. Since…"
Buffy nodded. "I think we all are."
The two girls sat side by side for a moment, the soft night sounds of the graveyard beginning to creep back after the disruption of earlier.
After a while, Buffy said, "So, Cordelia?"
"Yeah?"
"When did you start doing the sensitive chats?"
Cordelia frowned. "Me, sensitive? I'm not sensitive. You watch it. I'll glow your ass off, pal."
They both started to laugh.
*On to Chapter Four…*
Deeper among the gravestones, Cordelia stopped walking and turned to the shorter girl.
"I'm sorry for the crack about being ungrateful."
Buffy looked at the Seer in surprise. "That's okay. I deserved it. The thing was pounding us. You killed him."
"Buffy, believe it or not, I know exactly how you're feeling."
The Slayer drew in a shaky breath. "I don't think you do."
"I haven't replaced you. *We* haven't replaced you. Nobody could do that."
"It isn't about that," insisted Buffy, setting aside the small sting she felt at hearing Angel and Cordelia referred to as 'we'. "Being replaced. Hell, that's what Slayers do – we die, we're replaced. It's just, if you can do … what you do, and Angel can do what he does … and if there are enough people doing that all around the world, which, let's face it, there must be, 'cause it's not like Sunnydale has an exclusive on the evil and I'm just gonna take a breath now…"
Cordelia smiled. "You need to meet Fred sometime."
Buffy took a breath. Softly, she said, "If all that *is* happening, then why I am here?"
Cordy nodded slowly. "You could have had a normal life?"
"At least, starting from now I could. I have responsibilities. A job. I have to look after Dawn. I could just kinda … turn it on over to you guys. And the rest of the … people … like you. You know?"
Cordelia shook her head. "Nope, sorry."
"No?"
"No. Know why you're here?"
"To watch while you shine stuff to death?"
The taller girl shook her head again. "Because you're who we come to when we fail, Buffy. So … it hasn't happened yet. It might. And if it does, you're the world's big gun. You're *it*. You know? We need you. We'll always need you."
Buffy gazed at her silently, then sat down heavily. There were a million thoughts racing through her brain, not the least of which was an inability to comprehend the changes in the girl standing before her. Of all the people who could have made this much sense … it was Cordelia. CordYoda. Go figure.
The Seer sat down next to her, oblivious to Buffy's wonder. "When I ran into Angel in LA, I was about ready to cave and come home. Did I ever tell you that?"
"No."
"Well, I was. My acting career or lack thereof was a disaster, I had no money, I had no friends … basically I had no clue. I didn't know where I was supposed to be or who I was. But now I do. I know exactly what my path is, and guess what? It's the same as yours." She broke off and grinned knowingly. "Ain't that a kick in the teeth?"
Despite herself, Buffy cracked a smile. "Bitch."
"Vamp-tramp," replied Cordy, smirking.
"Shiny creepy girl."
"Fashion oversight."
"Demon half-breed."
"Hobbit-sized powerhouse freak."
"Thank you, Cordelia."
The girl in question shrugged. "I'm smarter than I look."
"And yet you still choose the rocky path of goodness?"
Cordelia tilted her head airily. "And yet."
"I mean, God, Cordelia." Buffy looked at her companion with new wonder. "What's happened to you? You're a frickin' *demon*."
"I know."
"The glowy thing…?"
"Yeah, I can't control it yet. It's kind of frustrating, actually. It only seems to happen when I'm all emotional. Like somebody I lo-, care about is in danger, or I'm really angry or really happy."
"There's evil to dust when you're really happy? What kind of agency do you guys have, anyway?"
Cordelia shrugged. "No dusting involved. Just a non-lethal, low-watt kind of shining. Without Jack Nicholson."
"I can't believe you guys didn't tell us."
"Sorry about that."
"Remember when you were mad we didn't tell you Harmony was a vampire?"
"Uh-huh."
"This is *way* bigger."
Cordelia grinned. "One day, remind me to tell you the story of how it happened. Thrills, chills, and a deal so sweet the devil couldn't have turned it down. Nobody smart would have." She paused. "Meet the dumbass who did."
Buffy looked at her quietly for a moment. "It's obviously a good thing. So, I'm glad. For both your sakes."
She didn't mention his name, but the word hung in the air between them.
Finally, Cordelia spoke. "He's doing okay, you know. Since…"
Buffy nodded. "I think we all are."
The two girls sat side by side for a moment, the soft night sounds of the graveyard beginning to creep back after the disruption of earlier.
After a while, Buffy said, "So, Cordelia?"
"Yeah?"
"When did you start doing the sensitive chats?"
Cordelia frowned. "Me, sensitive? I'm not sensitive. You watch it. I'll glow your ass off, pal."
They both started to laugh.
*On to Chapter Four…*