A/N: Hi ya'all! ^__^ This is the second chapter I've written in one day,
but it's so much fun! There's nothing like writing a humor story to get
away from it all…
To Ai_heiwa: It *is* fun isn't it? ^_^ I think I have an idea of what bath time's gonna be like…LOL! (Funny mental image!)
To Millie Wolfwood: Well, I couldn't let the poor guy go without his precious doughnuts, can I? ^^;
To Kiki: ^^ I was taking a shower a couple of days ago with this story in mind and the idea of how kinky it would be if Vash took a shower as Meryl… XD I hope you all are having as good a time reading this as I am writing this!
To Lynda-chan: You were? Whoa… (Goes off into a little world of wonder) …Oh right! I'm not that good at writing humor stories (I'm more psycho than I am funny), but I'm giving it my best shot!
…and nice reviews to top it all off! Thanks you guys! Oh, BTW, here's a chart of the orphanage kids and how old they are, yadda, yadda, yadda…
Janus (boy) 8 yrs.
Febru (girl), 9 yrs.
Marie (girl), 4 yrs.
April (girl), 11 yrs.
Mayflower (girl), 7 yrs.
Junie (boy), 9 yrs.
July (boy), 9 yrs.
August (boy), 13 yrs.
Tember (girl), 6 yrs.
Tober (girl) 6 yrs.
Vember (boy) 10 yrs.
Cember (boy) 10 yrs.
There, now you know how old they all are! ^^; Sorry, I just felt like doing that…
-Ca and her kitty Sammy =^_^=
Meryl lay in her new bed, staring up at the ceiling. Today has been so weird…she wondered how she'd get out of this one.
Meryl had discarded the crimson trench coat and it was now hanging neatly in the closet. Even if that was extremely un-Vash-like, she doubted if anyone cared to look into Vash's closet. She shifted her weight a little bit; how could that man stand wearing this stuffy, black body suit all day? After much squirming, tossing, and turning, Meryl had finally had enough.
She rose from the bed and stumbled around the dark room until she had found where Vash kept all of his shirts and slacks. She didn't go anywhere near the top drawer, from a day of doing and putting away laundry, she knew where the Humanoid Typhoon kept his under garments. Instead, she went for the second drawer. Inside, there were a good assortment of button-up shirts; Meryl pulled out a crème colored one, shut the drawer, and opened the next.
In there, were all of his slacks. She delved through those until she found a pair of green PJ's that Milly had knitted for Vash a couple of Christmas' ago. Meryl looked over her inventory with satisfaction – now for the hard part.
But…where do you start? Meryl had never worn a body suit before, so she wasn't too experienced at taking them off. After a very tedious search, Meryl found a zipper going a little ways down her back. She twisted and turned and curled until it was finally down as far as it would go: halfway down the back. Meryl peeled the right sleeve off. She recoiled a bit at the sight of Vash's many cuts and scars, but persevered and stepped out of the suit, her eyes screwed shut. She dropped the suit to the floor, patted her waists, and opened her eyes again – good, he at least had boxers on. She yanked the shirt and PJ's on and dumped herself back into bed.
Thoughts of Vash seeped into her tired mind. She recalled how sweetly he had smiled at her, and how he had trustingly leaned into her shoulder. Abruptly, Meryl shook her head cleared her mind, 'Woman, you have better things to ponder than that!'
How were they supposed to turn back to normal? Though Vash had suggested that they would return in the morning, she doubted that.
'All these thoughts are giving me a headache…'
Drowsily, two droopy eyelids closed over two weary aqua-green eyes, and Meryl promptly drifted to sleep.
~*~
"Uncle Vash, Uncle Vash, wake up!"
"Waphragah…?" Meryl opened her eyes to see the two boys, Junie and July, sitting on her stomach and staring into her face with anticipation, "What is it?"
"Today's Saturday, silly!" responded July, the elder of the two, "It's cartoon morning!"
"Alright. You guys go, I'll be right with you."
"Yay!"
The two hyperactive children scampered out of the room, slamming the door behind them and giggling madly.
Now Meryl remembered – Vash and the orphanage kids always got up extra early on Saturday mornings religiously, to watch cartoons. Occasionally, Wolfwood would join them, but it didn't happen too often; they *did* get up an hour or two before even Milly and Meryl would get up.
Meryl trudged into the living room, dragging a sheet behind her. There, all twelve children were huddled around the television, armed with plushies, pillows, and blankets. Meryl inwardly groaned; Wolfwood was sitting with them, so she had to act extremely carefully. He looked up at her, "G'morning Tongari! You're looking awfully cheerful this morning."
She froze for a second – Meryl had no clue how Vash acted early in the morning. Well…he didn't get up early too often so…
Meryl responded with something that wasn't too intelligible, and Wolfwood just shrugged and patted a spot next to him. She complied and set herself down.
"So…what did you and Meryl talk about yesterday?"
"Eh?" Crap. Yet another aspect of Vash that Meryl wasn't familiar with.
"You heard me. You always tell me, so I'm asking."
"Oh er…" Meryl pondered for a moment and answered slowly, "I figured that she would probably like something to munch on while typing' up her reports…"
Wolfwood's face grew roguish as he prodded onward, "I'm sure it went beyond a bit of doughnut munching with how long you stayed in there."
Meryl could feel her face becoming uncomfortably warm, "Well ah…we er, cuddled a bit and I stuck around to watch her type her report." To make her story sound credible, Meryl quickly added, "It was sorta boring, but I didn't feel like going back to my room."
Wolfwood nodded, looking a little bit disappointed, but withdrew. It was just in time as well, for then May turned around and put a finger to her lips, "Shh! The commercials are over now!"
Meryl grinned and leaned over to Wolfwood and whispered, "Yeah Uncle Nicky! I can't hear when you're talking so loud!"
The two friends broke into a short fit of laughs as Nicholas shoved Meryl aside with mock offence. They both got in trouble with May again as she stood up, pink rabbit plushie in hand, "You two are being vewwy bad boys! Me and Bunni will have to sit in between you so you don't be bad anymore!"
"C'mon May, I can't see!" complained Janus, who was comfortably perched upon a cushy slate-colored couch.
Meryl and Nick saluted May as she sat down between them, "Yes ma'am!"
From time to time, Meryl would glance around the room at the many occupants of the room, and would smile with amusement at how engrossed they were in the misadventures of Neko, the Amazing Super Cat, especially at Wolfwood. Now she knew why Vash and Nick loved this so much; the quiet company of the children was so soothing and made you feel at peace with the world. But while Meryl was enjoying the Saturday morning cartoons, Vash was having problems of his own…
~*~
Vash had been awake for quite a while. He was truly tempted to walk into the living room for cartoons, but knew that Meryl would take him alive if he didn't brush his (or her) hair, and change first. Just great.
He had found her burgundy colored brush and was stroking his midnight-black hair until it was silky and shining. That being done, he approached the dresser. Well…he already had some clean, er, unmentionables on so no worries there… He opened the top drawer and just took out some shirt at random. In another drawer, he yanked out a random skirt.
Woo…the fun part. Vash stripped himself of Meryl's outfit from the day before, revealing a lacey, white bra and silk (Ooooh, how exotic of Meryl! ^^;) panties. He was now blushing profusely and yanked on the clothes he picked out. Vash gaped at the stunning figure that stood before him in the mirror – an elfin young woman clad in a navy blue blouse and a carnation pink skirt. Vash snapped himself out of it and gave a slight frown; pink really wasn't his thing, but he wasn't really in the mood to search for something else.
As he stepped into the living room, Wolfwood looked up and nudged Meryl, whispering, "Someone's looking' hot today," in her ear. Meryl blushed a bit, and Vash got a notion of what he might have said.
"G'morning you guys. Er," Vash concentrated as hard as he could to sound Meryl-ish, "you're all up really early…"
Marie, who had always been very fond of Meryl, sprang from her spot between Febru and April and embraced Vash warmly, "Good morning Auntie Meryl!"
Vash completely forgot his act and returned the hug, grinning his own carefree grin, "Hello princess!" He stooped down a little to meet Marie eye- to-eye, "Didja sleep well?"
"Mm-hm!" Marie's floppy mahogany curls bounced furiously as she nodded.
"Good!" Vash attempted to swoop Marie into his arms, but forgot that Meryl didn't have the immense strength he did. Regardless of that, he still managed, even though it was a bit more work to keep Marie aloft.
"Well," commented Nick, "Looks like our PMS queen has decided to go on vacation, hmm?"
Now Vash knew what Meryl said whenever Wolfwood said something like that, "Oh shut up."
"Good morning everyone!" called the cheerful voice of Milly Thompson, "It seems I slept in today!"
"Aw, that's okay, Mil," replied Meryl. Then, she added, "But some of those blueberry waffles would be great!"
"Okay, I'm off then."
"Wait for us!" called Tember and Tober as the hurried after Milly, "We want to help!"
After a plentiful breakfast of blueberry waffles, orange juice, and apple wedges, Milly handed Meryl a hand-written list, "Mr. Vash, it's your turn to go grocery shopping."
Meryl's eyes flickered over to Vash and she grinned cheerily, "Sure!" She then gazed at Vash, "Meryl, come with me!"
Vash nearly answered far too quickly, but was now sort of enjoying the intricate game he was playing. He sighed, as if annoyed and answered loftily, "Oh, fine."
"Auntie Meryl, can I come too?" Ah, the chirpy chime of Marie.
Wolfwood, who was feeling quite in the joking mood this morning, leaned down to Marie and whispered into her ear, making it only so audible so that Meryl and Vash could hear, "Sorry sweetie, but you can't. Auntie Meryl and Uncle Vash are gonna go do some grown-up things."
Meryl so wanted to slap him. She cracked when she heard her voice yell, "Will not!" Meryl knew she was a pain some of the time, but she did *not* give such child-like responses, "C'mon Va-er, Meryl, we have a lot of shopping to do."
Vash followed behind Meryl like a baby quail, as she strode out the kitchen. Meryl made a double take, and stopped near the door, and replied rather loudly, "We'll just leave Nicholas and Milly to their own little thing."
Once out of the kitchen and in the living room, Marie tugged on April's sleeve.
"What is it, Marie?"
"What kind of grown-up stuff?"
"Huh?"
"Uncle Woofwood said Auntie Meryl and Uncle Vash were gonna do some grown- up stuff."
"Oh, that…" April laughed a little and whispered in Marie's ear.
Marie's eyes widened like saucers as she stared into April's indigo eyes, "That's what they do?" April nodded.
Marie was quiet for a moment when a look that said, 'ew-that's-so-gross' crossed her face, "But boys have cooties!"
~*~
Meryl and Vash were just leaving the general store. Meryl had a mountain of bags in her arms while Vash only had two, "I still don't know why you won't take at least one more bag."
"Oh come on, you *know* you make me carry all of the bags whenever we go grocery shopping. So…I'm just going with the act!" Vash chuckled at his own cleverness as he reached into one of Meryl's bags for a doughnut.
Meryl turned and gave a sly smirk, "If you're going with the act, then no doughnuts before desert!" She plucked a doughnut out of the bag and started to eat it, just to agitate Vash. He looked on with puppy-dog eyes. Meryl looked back at him, heaved a sigh, and gave him a doughnut, "Fine, fine! You win."
"Yay!" Vash accepted the doughnut gratefully.
They walked together down the sidewalk of the dirt road, in silence, when Vash spoke up once more, "Y'know, this isn't so bad."
"What?"
"Well, I think…I think it's sorta fun pretending I'm you."
Oh jeez. Meryl rolled her eyes and answered, "Yeah, well it is sort of fun getting a front-row-seat of how you act every day. I see you have been giving Nick details of whenever we'd hug or kiss."
"E…eheh…"
"-and from the sounds of it, you've been telling tall tales."
"Erm…sorry?"
Meryl nudged his shoulder, "Apology accepted, as long as it doesn't happen again."
"Okay."
They were almost at the door to the house when Vash spoke again, "How was today's episode of 'Neko the Amazing Super Cat?'"
The two friends laughed amiably as the flock of kids came out of the house to help with the groceries.
A/N: Weeeeee, how wazzat? I know exactly what I'm going to do in the next chappy! ^^; Oh, and for any of you who have seen the Tenchi series, the orphanage is built like that, but the downstairs floor has more rooms. Wondering why I said that? Well you won't know 'til the next chapter! Bwahaha, I'm soooooo evil!
Knives: Not really.
Ca: *Starts to bawl* I know, but I'm trying my hardest!
Knives: Bah, stupid spider. -_-
To Ai_heiwa: It *is* fun isn't it? ^_^ I think I have an idea of what bath time's gonna be like…LOL! (Funny mental image!)
To Millie Wolfwood: Well, I couldn't let the poor guy go without his precious doughnuts, can I? ^^;
To Kiki: ^^ I was taking a shower a couple of days ago with this story in mind and the idea of how kinky it would be if Vash took a shower as Meryl… XD I hope you all are having as good a time reading this as I am writing this!
To Lynda-chan: You were? Whoa… (Goes off into a little world of wonder) …Oh right! I'm not that good at writing humor stories (I'm more psycho than I am funny), but I'm giving it my best shot!
…and nice reviews to top it all off! Thanks you guys! Oh, BTW, here's a chart of the orphanage kids and how old they are, yadda, yadda, yadda…
Janus (boy) 8 yrs.
Febru (girl), 9 yrs.
Marie (girl), 4 yrs.
April (girl), 11 yrs.
Mayflower (girl), 7 yrs.
Junie (boy), 9 yrs.
July (boy), 9 yrs.
August (boy), 13 yrs.
Tember (girl), 6 yrs.
Tober (girl) 6 yrs.
Vember (boy) 10 yrs.
Cember (boy) 10 yrs.
There, now you know how old they all are! ^^; Sorry, I just felt like doing that…
-Ca and her kitty Sammy =^_^=
Meryl lay in her new bed, staring up at the ceiling. Today has been so weird…she wondered how she'd get out of this one.
Meryl had discarded the crimson trench coat and it was now hanging neatly in the closet. Even if that was extremely un-Vash-like, she doubted if anyone cared to look into Vash's closet. She shifted her weight a little bit; how could that man stand wearing this stuffy, black body suit all day? After much squirming, tossing, and turning, Meryl had finally had enough.
She rose from the bed and stumbled around the dark room until she had found where Vash kept all of his shirts and slacks. She didn't go anywhere near the top drawer, from a day of doing and putting away laundry, she knew where the Humanoid Typhoon kept his under garments. Instead, she went for the second drawer. Inside, there were a good assortment of button-up shirts; Meryl pulled out a crème colored one, shut the drawer, and opened the next.
In there, were all of his slacks. She delved through those until she found a pair of green PJ's that Milly had knitted for Vash a couple of Christmas' ago. Meryl looked over her inventory with satisfaction – now for the hard part.
But…where do you start? Meryl had never worn a body suit before, so she wasn't too experienced at taking them off. After a very tedious search, Meryl found a zipper going a little ways down her back. She twisted and turned and curled until it was finally down as far as it would go: halfway down the back. Meryl peeled the right sleeve off. She recoiled a bit at the sight of Vash's many cuts and scars, but persevered and stepped out of the suit, her eyes screwed shut. She dropped the suit to the floor, patted her waists, and opened her eyes again – good, he at least had boxers on. She yanked the shirt and PJ's on and dumped herself back into bed.
Thoughts of Vash seeped into her tired mind. She recalled how sweetly he had smiled at her, and how he had trustingly leaned into her shoulder. Abruptly, Meryl shook her head cleared her mind, 'Woman, you have better things to ponder than that!'
How were they supposed to turn back to normal? Though Vash had suggested that they would return in the morning, she doubted that.
'All these thoughts are giving me a headache…'
Drowsily, two droopy eyelids closed over two weary aqua-green eyes, and Meryl promptly drifted to sleep.
~*~
"Uncle Vash, Uncle Vash, wake up!"
"Waphragah…?" Meryl opened her eyes to see the two boys, Junie and July, sitting on her stomach and staring into her face with anticipation, "What is it?"
"Today's Saturday, silly!" responded July, the elder of the two, "It's cartoon morning!"
"Alright. You guys go, I'll be right with you."
"Yay!"
The two hyperactive children scampered out of the room, slamming the door behind them and giggling madly.
Now Meryl remembered – Vash and the orphanage kids always got up extra early on Saturday mornings religiously, to watch cartoons. Occasionally, Wolfwood would join them, but it didn't happen too often; they *did* get up an hour or two before even Milly and Meryl would get up.
Meryl trudged into the living room, dragging a sheet behind her. There, all twelve children were huddled around the television, armed with plushies, pillows, and blankets. Meryl inwardly groaned; Wolfwood was sitting with them, so she had to act extremely carefully. He looked up at her, "G'morning Tongari! You're looking awfully cheerful this morning."
She froze for a second – Meryl had no clue how Vash acted early in the morning. Well…he didn't get up early too often so…
Meryl responded with something that wasn't too intelligible, and Wolfwood just shrugged and patted a spot next to him. She complied and set herself down.
"So…what did you and Meryl talk about yesterday?"
"Eh?" Crap. Yet another aspect of Vash that Meryl wasn't familiar with.
"You heard me. You always tell me, so I'm asking."
"Oh er…" Meryl pondered for a moment and answered slowly, "I figured that she would probably like something to munch on while typing' up her reports…"
Wolfwood's face grew roguish as he prodded onward, "I'm sure it went beyond a bit of doughnut munching with how long you stayed in there."
Meryl could feel her face becoming uncomfortably warm, "Well ah…we er, cuddled a bit and I stuck around to watch her type her report." To make her story sound credible, Meryl quickly added, "It was sorta boring, but I didn't feel like going back to my room."
Wolfwood nodded, looking a little bit disappointed, but withdrew. It was just in time as well, for then May turned around and put a finger to her lips, "Shh! The commercials are over now!"
Meryl grinned and leaned over to Wolfwood and whispered, "Yeah Uncle Nicky! I can't hear when you're talking so loud!"
The two friends broke into a short fit of laughs as Nicholas shoved Meryl aside with mock offence. They both got in trouble with May again as she stood up, pink rabbit plushie in hand, "You two are being vewwy bad boys! Me and Bunni will have to sit in between you so you don't be bad anymore!"
"C'mon May, I can't see!" complained Janus, who was comfortably perched upon a cushy slate-colored couch.
Meryl and Nick saluted May as she sat down between them, "Yes ma'am!"
From time to time, Meryl would glance around the room at the many occupants of the room, and would smile with amusement at how engrossed they were in the misadventures of Neko, the Amazing Super Cat, especially at Wolfwood. Now she knew why Vash and Nick loved this so much; the quiet company of the children was so soothing and made you feel at peace with the world. But while Meryl was enjoying the Saturday morning cartoons, Vash was having problems of his own…
~*~
Vash had been awake for quite a while. He was truly tempted to walk into the living room for cartoons, but knew that Meryl would take him alive if he didn't brush his (or her) hair, and change first. Just great.
He had found her burgundy colored brush and was stroking his midnight-black hair until it was silky and shining. That being done, he approached the dresser. Well…he already had some clean, er, unmentionables on so no worries there… He opened the top drawer and just took out some shirt at random. In another drawer, he yanked out a random skirt.
Woo…the fun part. Vash stripped himself of Meryl's outfit from the day before, revealing a lacey, white bra and silk (Ooooh, how exotic of Meryl! ^^;) panties. He was now blushing profusely and yanked on the clothes he picked out. Vash gaped at the stunning figure that stood before him in the mirror – an elfin young woman clad in a navy blue blouse and a carnation pink skirt. Vash snapped himself out of it and gave a slight frown; pink really wasn't his thing, but he wasn't really in the mood to search for something else.
As he stepped into the living room, Wolfwood looked up and nudged Meryl, whispering, "Someone's looking' hot today," in her ear. Meryl blushed a bit, and Vash got a notion of what he might have said.
"G'morning you guys. Er," Vash concentrated as hard as he could to sound Meryl-ish, "you're all up really early…"
Marie, who had always been very fond of Meryl, sprang from her spot between Febru and April and embraced Vash warmly, "Good morning Auntie Meryl!"
Vash completely forgot his act and returned the hug, grinning his own carefree grin, "Hello princess!" He stooped down a little to meet Marie eye- to-eye, "Didja sleep well?"
"Mm-hm!" Marie's floppy mahogany curls bounced furiously as she nodded.
"Good!" Vash attempted to swoop Marie into his arms, but forgot that Meryl didn't have the immense strength he did. Regardless of that, he still managed, even though it was a bit more work to keep Marie aloft.
"Well," commented Nick, "Looks like our PMS queen has decided to go on vacation, hmm?"
Now Vash knew what Meryl said whenever Wolfwood said something like that, "Oh shut up."
"Good morning everyone!" called the cheerful voice of Milly Thompson, "It seems I slept in today!"
"Aw, that's okay, Mil," replied Meryl. Then, she added, "But some of those blueberry waffles would be great!"
"Okay, I'm off then."
"Wait for us!" called Tember and Tober as the hurried after Milly, "We want to help!"
After a plentiful breakfast of blueberry waffles, orange juice, and apple wedges, Milly handed Meryl a hand-written list, "Mr. Vash, it's your turn to go grocery shopping."
Meryl's eyes flickered over to Vash and she grinned cheerily, "Sure!" She then gazed at Vash, "Meryl, come with me!"
Vash nearly answered far too quickly, but was now sort of enjoying the intricate game he was playing. He sighed, as if annoyed and answered loftily, "Oh, fine."
"Auntie Meryl, can I come too?" Ah, the chirpy chime of Marie.
Wolfwood, who was feeling quite in the joking mood this morning, leaned down to Marie and whispered into her ear, making it only so audible so that Meryl and Vash could hear, "Sorry sweetie, but you can't. Auntie Meryl and Uncle Vash are gonna go do some grown-up things."
Meryl so wanted to slap him. She cracked when she heard her voice yell, "Will not!" Meryl knew she was a pain some of the time, but she did *not* give such child-like responses, "C'mon Va-er, Meryl, we have a lot of shopping to do."
Vash followed behind Meryl like a baby quail, as she strode out the kitchen. Meryl made a double take, and stopped near the door, and replied rather loudly, "We'll just leave Nicholas and Milly to their own little thing."
Once out of the kitchen and in the living room, Marie tugged on April's sleeve.
"What is it, Marie?"
"What kind of grown-up stuff?"
"Huh?"
"Uncle Woofwood said Auntie Meryl and Uncle Vash were gonna do some grown- up stuff."
"Oh, that…" April laughed a little and whispered in Marie's ear.
Marie's eyes widened like saucers as she stared into April's indigo eyes, "That's what they do?" April nodded.
Marie was quiet for a moment when a look that said, 'ew-that's-so-gross' crossed her face, "But boys have cooties!"
~*~
Meryl and Vash were just leaving the general store. Meryl had a mountain of bags in her arms while Vash only had two, "I still don't know why you won't take at least one more bag."
"Oh come on, you *know* you make me carry all of the bags whenever we go grocery shopping. So…I'm just going with the act!" Vash chuckled at his own cleverness as he reached into one of Meryl's bags for a doughnut.
Meryl turned and gave a sly smirk, "If you're going with the act, then no doughnuts before desert!" She plucked a doughnut out of the bag and started to eat it, just to agitate Vash. He looked on with puppy-dog eyes. Meryl looked back at him, heaved a sigh, and gave him a doughnut, "Fine, fine! You win."
"Yay!" Vash accepted the doughnut gratefully.
They walked together down the sidewalk of the dirt road, in silence, when Vash spoke up once more, "Y'know, this isn't so bad."
"What?"
"Well, I think…I think it's sorta fun pretending I'm you."
Oh jeez. Meryl rolled her eyes and answered, "Yeah, well it is sort of fun getting a front-row-seat of how you act every day. I see you have been giving Nick details of whenever we'd hug or kiss."
"E…eheh…"
"-and from the sounds of it, you've been telling tall tales."
"Erm…sorry?"
Meryl nudged his shoulder, "Apology accepted, as long as it doesn't happen again."
"Okay."
They were almost at the door to the house when Vash spoke again, "How was today's episode of 'Neko the Amazing Super Cat?'"
The two friends laughed amiably as the flock of kids came out of the house to help with the groceries.
A/N: Weeeeee, how wazzat? I know exactly what I'm going to do in the next chappy! ^^; Oh, and for any of you who have seen the Tenchi series, the orphanage is built like that, but the downstairs floor has more rooms. Wondering why I said that? Well you won't know 'til the next chapter! Bwahaha, I'm soooooo evil!
Knives: Not really.
Ca: *Starts to bawl* I know, but I'm trying my hardest!
Knives: Bah, stupid spider. -_-