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CHAPTER SIX - CAMARADERIE

'People living their lives for you on TV ... They say they're better than you and you agree ... Another burger, another hot dog, some fries ... A wish in the well, hope your health don't go to hell, well ... Another doctor's bill, another lawyer's bill ... Another cute cheap thrill ... You know you love him if you put him in your will ... Who will save your soul when it comes to the flower ... Who will save your soul after all the lies that you told, boy ... Who will save your soul if you won't save your own? ... We try to hustle them, try to bustle them, try to cuss them ... The cops want someone to bust down on Orleans Avenue ... Another day, another dollar, another war, another tower ... Went up to where the homeless had their homes ... So we pray to as many gods are there are flowers ... But we call religion our friend ... We're so worried about saving our souls ... Afraid that God will take His toll ... That we forget to begin ... Some are walking, some are talking, some are stalking their kill ... You get social security, but that don't pay your bills ... There are addictions to feed and there are mouths to pay ... So you bargain with the Devil, say you're ok for today, ... You say that you love them, take their money and run ... Say, it's been swell, sweetheart, but it was just one of those things ... Those flings, those strings you've got to cut, ... So get out on the streets, girls, and bust your butts ...(Jewel: 'Who Will Save Your Soul')'

The Slums. Midgar. Afternoon.

Elena kicked at a loose pebble that had previously been sitting quietly on the ground. She walked without any real purpose out of the wreckage of Sector Seven. She had no idea where she was going, partially because she was feeling lost emotionally and partially because she was physically lost. She had never spent much time in the slums growing up. She could've told anyone directions on the upper plate, but down below with the Planet beneath her feet, she was completely disoriented.

She was mad at Rude for telling her she should talk to Tifa. What was she supposed to say to someone she had once considered an enemy for no reason other than that it was what Shinra said to do? She felt like a traitor to her only two friends just thinking about it.

She paused at the ruined playground and looked at the shrapnel from the Sector Seven explosion and the subsequent Weapon and Meteor attacks forming misshapen whiskers on the cat slide. She wondered of the children who had enjoyed that slide and the swings that now dangled, broken, from their moorings, unusable and purposeless. She closed her eyes for a moment and remembered back to her own childhood, trying to recall times spent in a playground. The ghosts of children who had played here filled her senses with their cries of delight. She frowned, unable to recall any of her own cries of delight, unable to recall any happy times in the playgrounds on the Plate.

Her childhood hadn't been unhappy or unfulfilled, being filled with birthday parties and pretty pink dresses with lace and ruffles. A life of nannies and play dates with the children of other Shinra executives, as her father had been. Vacations in Costa del Sol, the perfect picture of the perfect Midgar family, but no memories of playing, carefree and shameless, in a playground such as this.

She sighed as she moved on past the ruined playground. She avoided Wall Market, not wishing to find Reno or Rude right now. Even though the popular, but seedy neighborhood hadn't fared much better than the other areas, Wall Market still boasted its great bar. The bar owner had somehow ferreted away a generator powered by something other than the now-defunct Mako and was busy keeping his business afloat. Reno and Rude were more than happy to oblige him, and the former Turks could often still be found there, trying to drink one another under the table

She'd been working in the ruins of Sector Seven for the past few weeks, thinking that the desolation and ramshackle appearance of the buildings they had uncovered was due to the destruction caused by the fall of the plate. She wasn't prepared to find that same ramshackle, haphazard look to the buildings as she wandered through the rough-cut opening to Sector Five. Sector Six had suffered heavy damage during the attacks, but the buildings still stood amongst the rubble, even though most looked as if the slightest gust of wind would blow them over.

Elena shook her head as she moved on, shocked that people actually lived like this. That they could make their homes in whatever they could find- corrugated metal, sheet metal scavenged from old cars, trailers, and motor homes, even an old pipe.

She stopped, awestruck as the visage of the old church came into view, a large hole in its roof, the intricate stained glass of the windows nearly all broken out, but still looking regal in its neglected splendor. An aura of comfort emanated from its tired structure. She was drawn closer to it, as if not being moved by her own volition, but by some greater force. She stood in the arched doorway for a moment, taking in the sight of the interior that was in almost the same amount of disarray as the exterior. She was shocked to find in the center of the floor, where the floorboards had rotted away, a flowerbed.

It was so crazy. Amidst all that destruction. A perfect, blooming, flowerbed.

And it was in that very church, kneeling by that same flowerbed, that Elena found Tifa. She didn't want to bother her, seeing that she seemed absorbed in the flowerbed, but knowing that she couldn't just leave. Something deeper compelled her to stay.

Steeling her resolve, she walked over to the other woman. She had no idea what to say, but hoped that whatever force had guided her to this place would also put the right words in her mouth.

"Have I ever thanked you?" Elena wasn't sure why she had asked that question, but she shrugged inwardly, letting herself be guided.

Tifa looked up, startled to have her quiet time in Aeris' church interrupted. Despite Cloud's feelings for the other woman, Tifa and Aeris had been friends, and it wasn't really Aeris' fault that Cloud was such a jerk. She was even more shocked to find that the person that dared to interrupt her was Elena. "For what?"

"For allowing me the opportunity to join the Turks."

Tifa gave the other woman a strange look. "How did I help you join the Turks?" Elena had to be crazy. That was the only explanation for this strange conversation.

Elena smiled shyly. "You kicked Reno's ass on the plate." She looked around the building and blushed. "Oops. Maybe I shouldn't be profane in a church?"

Tifa smirked in spite of herself and her surroundings. "Even though the coward ran off before we could finish the job." Tifa too blushed, realizing what she was saying. "Maybe I shouldn't be talking of killing someone in a church."

Elena laughed softly, amazed to find even the smallest ledge of common ground that she and Tifa could, and actually were, standing on.

"I'm sorry if I've interrupted you." Elena apologized, her upper plate manners suddenly remembered.

"No, it's okay." Tifa replied, not sure why she suddenly didn't mind being interrupted by this former Turk, her former enemy. "I just come here to-"

'To what?' She thought. 'To be closer to Aeris? To think, to meditate, to get away... to be with a friend?'

"I just come here because I feel safe here." Tifa smiled shyly. "This is Aeris' church and these are her flowers."

In truth, Tifa went there to talk to Aeris, but she wasn't ready to admit that to Elena. She was trying to make sense of everything around her, and talking to her Cetra friend, despite that Tifa didn't know if Aeris really heard her or not, helped. Sometimes she thought that she could see Aeris kneeling there with her tending to her beloved flowerbed, but Tifa was certain that was only her imagination playing tricks on her. Tending to the flowers helped put things into perspective. And it was helping her to forget Cloud Strife. Maybe Aeris really was the one that Cloud had belonged with.

Elena was surprised by Tifa's admission. "You don't hate her?" Reeve had mentioned during one of their many conversations that Cloud had left when the other members of Avalanche had, headed to the City of the Ancients because of his love for Aeris.

Tifa shook her head. "No, it wasn't her fault. How can you hate someone with such a ready smile and caring nature?"

Elena had no answer to dispute her with. "I guess you can't." She looked at Tifa with a piercing gaze, one that she didn't know she possessed. "Like you for instance."

Tifa was taken aback for a moment. "Me? What do you mean?"

"We were enemies once, but I never really hated you. I secretly admired you. All of you. Besides," Elena smirked wryly, "when you really look at it, we were all fighting for the same thing."

Tifa looked at Elena strangely. "We weren't on the same side. How could we all be fighting for the same thing?"

Elena smiled. "We were all fighting for ourselves. For whatever personal gain, whether it be material or psychological. The rest... the Planet, Shinra, it was all secondary." Elena leaned back, supporting her weight on her elbows and looking up through the hole in the roof of the church, through which an ethereal light shone onto the flowers below.

Tifa looked around her at the church. "These slums, the bar... it's all I had... after Nibelheim..." She too looked up through the hole in the roof, seeing the haze of the fires, though now contained, smoldering in other sectors wafting in with the crazy ethereal light that permeated this haven. "... And now... now I don't even have that... and everyone blames me for the destruction." She placed her head in her hands, willing herself not the let the sobs that threatened to wrack her body escape. "But I never... I never blew up the reactors."

Reno's hateful words returned to haunt her, his voice mocking as it resounded through her mind. 'Look at your hands, Ms. High and Mighty. Their fucking blood is on your hands as sure as it is on mine.' She hadn't realized until that moment how deeply Reno's words had wounded her. She never thought that it was her fault. That she could take the blame for it. Not when she was only fighting to hold onto the last shred of personal dignity that she had left. She never thought to think that his anger wasn't directed at her over the reactors.

Elena was at a loss. She had never had many friends growing up, and female friends were even fewer and far between. She was afraid to touch the other woman, afraid of her reaction. They had been enemies after all. But Elena had reconciled herself to putting the past behind her and moving on to the future. Shinra was dead and she was fully behind Reeve and his plans for the new Midgar. She finally gathered up some courage and placed a hand comfortingly on the younger woman's shoulder.

"No one blames you."

"Reno does." Tifa stated sadly, not sure why she was upset over him. Maybe it was the fact that he hated her, that he was always rubbing her nose in the destruction. Or maybe it was because she had let herself get close to him in the past only to find out he was a part of the Shinra Elite. She wasn't ready to tell Elena about their past. It just didn't seem like the right thing to do at the moment, even though she was still shaking over their earlier encounter in Reeve's makeshift office. 'I may have fucked you once, but I'm not above killing you now.' It had brought back so many memories when he had gotten in her face with his threats. It hadn't been like he had said. She could remember that warm night in Costa del Sol so clearly…

He came up behind her in their room where she was standing in front of the mirror brushing out her long hair, carefully working out the tangles from a day at the beach. She still wore only the red bikini that had been driving him wild all day. She had been self-conscious in it earlier, worried about the scar on her chest. He had proclaimed it "barely noticeable", which it was, and carted her off towards the beach.

She saw him come up behind her in the mirror before she felt the warmth of his bare chest pressing against her back and his arms wrapping around her slender waist. He kissed her neck and moved his lips down to her shoulder. When he felt her stiffen slightly he whispered.

'If you want me to stop, I will."

She shook her head to tell him that she didn't want him to stop. After spending a day at the beach with him, away from Midgar, she had relaxed around him, and felt a lot more comfortable just being with him. She didn't want him to ever stop kissing and touching her.

"No, it's all right. I want you to."

Tifa mentally shook off the memories and forcefully chided herself for allowing that to resurface as she realized that Elena was speaking.

Elena looked around her, afraid to hesitate before answering, but knowing that she had to choose her words carefully. While she really wanted to say 'Reno's a dumbass', she knew she couldn't voice that sentiment, not here, and not now. How she wished for Reeve's tactful way of phrasing things at this moment. "Reno... Reno hasn't come to terms with everything yet."

"Have you?"

"I'm trying. I'm here, aren't I?" Elena paused for a moment to think. "I'm dedicated to helping rebuild Midgar. For Reeve, for myself, for the people, for my children, for all of our futures." She was having trouble grasping the right words to say.

"So am I." Tifa smiled a little through the tears. "I didn't really have anywhere else to go, and it was Midgar that became my home after... after my parents died." Tifa tried not to shudder, remembering the fire and Sephiroth's blade cutting short her father's life.

"Midgar has always been my home." Elena spoke softly, finally finding what she felt were the right words. "And I can't imagine living anywhere else."

Tifa nodded. "Nibelheim is no longer my home. It's become nothing but another in Shinra's long list of deceptions. But Midgar is our second chance, and I've decided to try. For Reeve's sake and the sake of Midgar. If I have to completely avoid Reno, I will. At least I hope I can." Tifa laughed softly. "But at least I'll see him coming. That flame on his head is hard to miss."

Elena laughed along with Tifa, feeling almost a pang of guilt at laughing at her friend, but it was hard not to laugh at the obvious, and Reno's fiery red hair was extremely obvious.

As Elena laughed with her, Tifa realized that somewhere in all of this mess she and Elena had broken the ice between them and managed to plant the first seeds of friendship.