This is something I wrote for my brother's website after a discussion we
had about *Nsync in Star Wars and Lance feeding a giraffe. That doesn't
really have anything to do with it, but Lance – he fed a giraffe y'know. Uh
huh. Go to Obi Tom Kenobi's and Qui-Gon Jimm's Star Wars Page to find out
what some, if not all, of the madness is about.
Disclaimer: I don't own, know, or am in any way affiliated with *Nsync. If I did I certainly wouldn't be wasting my time writing stories about them. I'd be…doing other stuff. You know what I mean. Same goes for Star Wars. I do kinda own the Evil Sith though. He's Qui Gon Jimm in case you hadn't guessed (dumbass). But I made him evil. So I own the Dark Side of my brother. Cool.
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away five noble Jedi had just come off stage.
JC: Whew! Good show, huh guys?
Lance: Yeah, man.
When suddenly they were confronted by a really, really evil Sith with spikey horns and ginger hair.
Evil Sith: You shall die *Nsync! You don't belong in Star Wars.
Joey: Neither do you dude.
Evil Sith: Shut up Fat One! You can't even act!
Joey: You can talk dude! And your hair looks even stupider then Chris' dreads!
Chris: Hey! If we're talking about hair, I seem to remember a fluorescent blonde stage…
Justin: Now, now guys, this is the way of the Dark Side. He's just trying to turn us against each other!
Lance: You just don't want them to start talking about your dumb white boy afro.
Justin: *lunges at Lance, but is held back by JC* You don't diss my afro, you inbred Southern fag! And you can't act either!
JC: You know he's touchy about the afro Lance!
Lance: I'll have you know that screenings of "On The Line" sold out in Laurel, Mississippi!
Justin: That's your hometown! Your momma bought them all!
Evil Sith: *clears throat obviously*Hph-hph! Can we get back to me here, Kitchen*sync?
All: Hey!
A massive battle ensued, with the Evil Sith being brutally beheaded by the noble (and cute!) Jedi of *Nsync! Nah, I couldn't really let that happen could I? James'd kill me. So…
A massive battle, blahdy blah blah, which ended with Thrusty Justy and Joey Fat One lying dead on the floor.
JC: Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Justin! Tell me you don't love me!
Chris: Dude…something you want to tell us?
Lance: Hey Chris, you know what this means don't you?
Chris: We finally get to sing!
Both: Woo hoo!!!!!!!
Evil Sith: Well, I think I'll let you three live, seeing as killing Justin and Fat One was my main aim, and you are the more attractive three.
All: …
Evil Sith: *searches for lame excuse* Well…according to my sister anyway.
Lance: Riiiiiiight.
Evil Sith: And since I've let you live, how about getting me a part in the next Star Wars film? And now that Britney's single, perhaps you could introduce us…
And they all walked off into the sunset and lived happily ever after. Sort of.
Lance and Chris went on to have a successful musical career as a duo, and became ridiculously rich. Lance married the Evil Sith's sister (Author: *whistles innocently*)
JC never really got over the loss of Justin and spent the remainder of his life in a mental home, crying whenever he heard *Nsync songs.
Evil Sith got that part in the next Star Wars film, and went on to have a successful acting career. In his spare time he liked to threaten boybands. He and Britney were married soon after, and had seven ginger children.
Disclaimer: I don't own, know, or am in any way affiliated with *Nsync. If I did I certainly wouldn't be wasting my time writing stories about them. I'd be…doing other stuff. You know what I mean. Same goes for Star Wars. I do kinda own the Evil Sith though. He's Qui Gon Jimm in case you hadn't guessed (dumbass). But I made him evil. So I own the Dark Side of my brother. Cool.
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away five noble Jedi had just come off stage.
JC: Whew! Good show, huh guys?
Lance: Yeah, man.
When suddenly they were confronted by a really, really evil Sith with spikey horns and ginger hair.
Evil Sith: You shall die *Nsync! You don't belong in Star Wars.
Joey: Neither do you dude.
Evil Sith: Shut up Fat One! You can't even act!
Joey: You can talk dude! And your hair looks even stupider then Chris' dreads!
Chris: Hey! If we're talking about hair, I seem to remember a fluorescent blonde stage…
Justin: Now, now guys, this is the way of the Dark Side. He's just trying to turn us against each other!
Lance: You just don't want them to start talking about your dumb white boy afro.
Justin: *lunges at Lance, but is held back by JC* You don't diss my afro, you inbred Southern fag! And you can't act either!
JC: You know he's touchy about the afro Lance!
Lance: I'll have you know that screenings of "On The Line" sold out in Laurel, Mississippi!
Justin: That's your hometown! Your momma bought them all!
Evil Sith: *clears throat obviously*Hph-hph! Can we get back to me here, Kitchen*sync?
All: Hey!
A massive battle ensued, with the Evil Sith being brutally beheaded by the noble (and cute!) Jedi of *Nsync! Nah, I couldn't really let that happen could I? James'd kill me. So…
A massive battle, blahdy blah blah, which ended with Thrusty Justy and Joey Fat One lying dead on the floor.
JC: Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Justin! Tell me you don't love me!
Chris: Dude…something you want to tell us?
Lance: Hey Chris, you know what this means don't you?
Chris: We finally get to sing!
Both: Woo hoo!!!!!!!
Evil Sith: Well, I think I'll let you three live, seeing as killing Justin and Fat One was my main aim, and you are the more attractive three.
All: …
Evil Sith: *searches for lame excuse* Well…according to my sister anyway.
Lance: Riiiiiiight.
Evil Sith: And since I've let you live, how about getting me a part in the next Star Wars film? And now that Britney's single, perhaps you could introduce us…
And they all walked off into the sunset and lived happily ever after. Sort of.
Lance and Chris went on to have a successful musical career as a duo, and became ridiculously rich. Lance married the Evil Sith's sister (Author: *whistles innocently*)
JC never really got over the loss of Justin and spent the remainder of his life in a mental home, crying whenever he heard *Nsync songs.
Evil Sith got that part in the next Star Wars film, and went on to have a successful acting career. In his spare time he liked to threaten boybands. He and Britney were married soon after, and had seven ginger children.