Author's note: For anyone that hasn't come across it, Experimental has a
third companion piece titled "Of Peaks and Valleys" that deals with Spike's
POV of his first night with our favorite Slayer.
Entry# 24
I awoke to a ringing phone. For a moment I considered ignoring it in favor of William's arms but then I remembered.
Willow. She was supposed to call me as soon as she knew something. I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the phone sitting in the dresser.
"Hello" I whispered.
"Buffy, hi. I just got off the phone with Xander. He agreed to come over tonight after his shift is done which should be around seven"
"He didn't sound suspicious or anything?" After all if Riley knew then there was a chance that other members of the Initiative did too.
She considered for a moment. "No. I don't think so. He just sounded happy to hear from us"
Great. Now, I felt guilty about attempting to use him. But if that's what it took to save William then that's what I was going to do.
"Thank you Will. I know that this must be hard for you"
"That's okay. I just hope that Xander will be willing to help us. By the way how is William?"
"He seems to be doing well" Better that well actually. "Still, I know what I am up against" As I said this I turned to look at him. He slept tangled in the sheets. One slender foot hung over from the right side of the bed. He was still painfully thin but I loved the way his muscles had rippled as he pressed against me last night. The coolness of his pale skin against my feverish one. The way his teeth had nipped at my breasts. How his tongue ran through…
"Earth to Buffy. You know I am still here" Willow sounded amused. As if she knew what had been going through my head.
"Sorry, Willow. I just got a bit sidetracked" with bad Buffy thoughts I added silently.
"No prob. I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing. Just remember to be here at seven"
"Will do. And thanks again"
I hung up the phone and hurried back to bed. He shifted slightly and spooned against me. His left arm went around my waist and pulled me even closer. A warm, happy feeling stirred inside me. I think it stemmed from knowing that I was loved. Truly, madly and deeply.
"Who was that luv?" His words made me jump. I thought that he was still sleeping.
"Willow. Just Willow" I hoped that he would leave it at that.
"Oh" he said simply and I breathed a sigh of relief.
Soft, fleeting kisses were distributed along my back. I almost purred at the sensation of his tongue running through my sensitive skin. It traveled from my back to my neck area and lower. Suddenly it was too much. I flipped around and trapped his mouth in mine. It was one of those Hollywood kisses. Passionate and searing. My lips were tingling by the time we pulled apart. I liked the sensation and wanted more. I was preparing myself for the second round when I caught the look in his eyes. The sapphire blues shone with their customary adoration but I also saw something else in them. Regret? I was immediately worried.
"What's wrong?" My heart sank at the idea that he could be regretting last night.
He shook his head. "Nothing luv. I was just wishing that things were differently. That we could stay in this room forever"
I knew the feeling. I cuddled closer to him. He continued.
"Unfortunately, this is the hand that we were dealt and I mean to see it to its end"
I had no idea what that meant but I knew that it couldn't be good,
"What are you saying?"
"That you have to let me go" His eyes would not meet my own.
"Go where?" I couldn't keep the panic from my words. He was leaving me.
"When the time comes you have to let me die"
"NO… how can you say that? You are not going to die" The tears were spilling from my own eyes now.
"Buffy, I know what is happening to me and I can see that you are trying to do something to stop it. I also know that you will be putting your reputation, your very life at stake. I won't let you do that. I won't let you destroy yourself for me"
There was a clamp in my heart and it was twisting as he said the words. He knew. He knew that he was dying. He knew that I was planning on stopping that.
His voice softened. "But what I want from you is time. I want time to be near you. To feel you. To love you. That's all I ask for, nothing more"
I could barely distinguish through the torrent of tears. He had given up and wanted me to do the same. But no. I was never going to give up on him no matter what I had to face.
TBC. Sorry for the short chapter but its past 2am and I am about to collapse on the keyboard. I will try to write more later on today. Thank you for the wonderful reviews and keep them coming.
Entry# 24
I awoke to a ringing phone. For a moment I considered ignoring it in favor of William's arms but then I remembered.
Willow. She was supposed to call me as soon as she knew something. I scrambled out of bed and grabbed the phone sitting in the dresser.
"Hello" I whispered.
"Buffy, hi. I just got off the phone with Xander. He agreed to come over tonight after his shift is done which should be around seven"
"He didn't sound suspicious or anything?" After all if Riley knew then there was a chance that other members of the Initiative did too.
She considered for a moment. "No. I don't think so. He just sounded happy to hear from us"
Great. Now, I felt guilty about attempting to use him. But if that's what it took to save William then that's what I was going to do.
"Thank you Will. I know that this must be hard for you"
"That's okay. I just hope that Xander will be willing to help us. By the way how is William?"
"He seems to be doing well" Better that well actually. "Still, I know what I am up against" As I said this I turned to look at him. He slept tangled in the sheets. One slender foot hung over from the right side of the bed. He was still painfully thin but I loved the way his muscles had rippled as he pressed against me last night. The coolness of his pale skin against my feverish one. The way his teeth had nipped at my breasts. How his tongue ran through…
"Earth to Buffy. You know I am still here" Willow sounded amused. As if she knew what had been going through my head.
"Sorry, Willow. I just got a bit sidetracked" with bad Buffy thoughts I added silently.
"No prob. I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing. Just remember to be here at seven"
"Will do. And thanks again"
I hung up the phone and hurried back to bed. He shifted slightly and spooned against me. His left arm went around my waist and pulled me even closer. A warm, happy feeling stirred inside me. I think it stemmed from knowing that I was loved. Truly, madly and deeply.
"Who was that luv?" His words made me jump. I thought that he was still sleeping.
"Willow. Just Willow" I hoped that he would leave it at that.
"Oh" he said simply and I breathed a sigh of relief.
Soft, fleeting kisses were distributed along my back. I almost purred at the sensation of his tongue running through my sensitive skin. It traveled from my back to my neck area and lower. Suddenly it was too much. I flipped around and trapped his mouth in mine. It was one of those Hollywood kisses. Passionate and searing. My lips were tingling by the time we pulled apart. I liked the sensation and wanted more. I was preparing myself for the second round when I caught the look in his eyes. The sapphire blues shone with their customary adoration but I also saw something else in them. Regret? I was immediately worried.
"What's wrong?" My heart sank at the idea that he could be regretting last night.
He shook his head. "Nothing luv. I was just wishing that things were differently. That we could stay in this room forever"
I knew the feeling. I cuddled closer to him. He continued.
"Unfortunately, this is the hand that we were dealt and I mean to see it to its end"
I had no idea what that meant but I knew that it couldn't be good,
"What are you saying?"
"That you have to let me go" His eyes would not meet my own.
"Go where?" I couldn't keep the panic from my words. He was leaving me.
"When the time comes you have to let me die"
"NO… how can you say that? You are not going to die" The tears were spilling from my own eyes now.
"Buffy, I know what is happening to me and I can see that you are trying to do something to stop it. I also know that you will be putting your reputation, your very life at stake. I won't let you do that. I won't let you destroy yourself for me"
There was a clamp in my heart and it was twisting as he said the words. He knew. He knew that he was dying. He knew that I was planning on stopping that.
His voice softened. "But what I want from you is time. I want time to be near you. To feel you. To love you. That's all I ask for, nothing more"
I could barely distinguish through the torrent of tears. He had given up and wanted me to do the same. But no. I was never going to give up on him no matter what I had to face.
TBC. Sorry for the short chapter but its past 2am and I am about to collapse on the keyboard. I will try to write more later on today. Thank you for the wonderful reviews and keep them coming.