Disclaimer: Don't own em, blah, blah, blah.

A Matter of Honor

Quistis Trepe sighed softly, looking over at the perfect features of the man who lay in bed beside her. She breathed deeply, willing the intoxicating scent of him to fill her being. Smiling, she ran a delicate finger down his arm, reveling in the simple touch. 

            "Seifer," she whispered. "I know you're not asleep…" She could tell by the little crease above his eyebrows that never seemed to fade away except in his slumber.

Seifer Almasy cracked one jade green eye open at her, the sight of her there beside him still able to take his breath away after nearly a year together. Her honey colored hair was spread about her face in a tousled golden halo, and the brilliant cerulean of her eyes stood out even in the darkened room.

"Mmmm….Yes?"

Quistis looked down, snuggling closer to him. "I've been thinking a lot lately…"

"About?"

"Well….do you ever think about the future?"

"I try not to."

"Oh…"

Several silent moments passed while Quistis gathered her thoughts and her courage.      

"SeeD's usually don't live past their thirty-fifth birthday," she began slowly. "It's a dangerous life, when any given day might be our last. Do you ever think about how important every single day is? Every meeting, every contact, every afternoon spent with a friend, every evening spent with a lover…"         

A sensation Seifer was unused to feeling clutched it's icy hand around his heart. He sat up on his side, turning to look fully at her. "What are you trying to say?"         

He hadn't meant to sound so bitter, but he knew as soon as the words were spoken he'd let his fear show through. She looked a little taken aback by the bite in his voice.

"I…I'm just trying to say that, well, time is valuable—"

Seifer sat up, unwilling to hear any more. "So valuable you needn't spend every moment with me. Don't bother to explain, Quistis, I understand."

Quistis blinked. "What?"

"Oh, sorry to steal away the pleasure of saying it yourself," he snapped, grabbing his clothes off the back of the chair at her desk. "Let me see if I can get it right. We're young, but we might die any day, so we really shouldn't restrict ourselves to just each other. After all, what might we be missing?"

"No, Seifer, wait—"

"Oh, I'm sure you had a really lovely speech prepared, Instructor," he bit out, "but I really should be going. All those other fish to catch, after all." In a flurry of grey trenchcoat, Seifer stormed out of Quistis's dorm room.

She was left staring at an empty room, in a bed suddenly made cold by his absence. Crystalline tears formed at the edges of her sapphire orbs as she sat there, holding his pillow in her hands, wondering what the hell just happened.

"Seifer?" she whispered as the tears escaped their blue prison to slide down her cheeks. "I…I was going to say we should get married…."

* * * *

Seifer stopped in front of his dorm room, taking a deep breath and resting one hand against the door. His eyes were burning, his face flushed, and he felt suddenly weak in the knees as it hit him what had just happened.

I left her…His troubled thoughts led him to a memory, of a conversation from earlier that day…

"You're incapable of doing anything but hurting her," the angry woman in a crisp SeeD uniform snapped. "I suppose you think you're real slick, using her as your ticket back into this place."

"That's not how it happened!" he shouted back. A year with Quistis had done much to teach him about controlling his temper, but this woman here was pushing his limits.

Mostly because, deep down inside, he feared what she spoke was truth…

"Oh, really? Everyone else might have forgiven you, lapdog, but I will never forget. You are not good enough for Quistis. You are nothing but a monster."

He ran a nervous hand through his short blonde hair. What have I done?

Your worst. Just like always.

I over-reacted.

You're just a screw up, Almasy.

Lapdog.

Worthless…

This was for Quistis. She'll be much better off without me.

With an angry growl, Seifer stormed into his room.

Author's Note: Well, guys, here it is, my very first Seiftis. What do you think? Scrap it? Keep going? Make it as short as originally planned? Make it an epic? Let me know!!!