Nothing
'What are you doing?' Mark asked Rachel as he walked into the lounge, trying to break the deathly silence that hung over the room.
'Nothing,' she choked out, staring straight ahead.
'Well the TV's on, what are you watching?' Rachel blinked, and looked at the screen. So it was. She didn't remember turning it on. But then she didn't remember leaving the hospital, or coming home. All she remembered was seeing Ella lying on the bed, like a tiny doll, with wires coming from her, like she wasn't a living human being.
'Nothing,' she finally replied. Mark slowly walked over and sat down next to her on the sofa.
'Is there anything you want to talk about?'
'Nothing.' Nothing, everything, anything. She didn't know what she wanted to do. All she wanted to do was tell everyone how sorry she was, but sorry wasn't a strong enough word. There wasn't anything she could do that would make up for this.
This morning everything had been so perfect. Ella was being an absolute angel, and for once Rachel actually felt like she was being allowed to be her sister. She never could have dreamed when she woke up this morning that something like this would happen. Or that it would all be her fault.
She suddenly remembered something she'd said that morning to Elizabeth. 'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick.' She shuddered. If only it was just gastroenteritis that Ella had. 'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick.'
Rachel didn't realise she'd just said her last thought out loud until her father spoke. 'Rachel?' She looked up at him, eyes moist with tears. 'What were you just talking about?'
'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick,' she whispered again. 'I didn't want her to get sick. This isn't fair, it's not right.' Her words were barely audible, not really being spoken to anyone but herself.
'Talk to me Rachel.' Mark worried about her. One of his daughters was at County General, critically ill, and the other was sat here next to him, looking on the verge of a possible depression.
Rachel's eyes filled up with tears for the umpteenth time that day. She'd done something terrible: something she could never do anything to repay the hurt and emotion everyone was feeling because of. As she shook with the sobs that were wracking her body, she threw herself into her father's arms. 'I've done so much wrong, and now there's nothing I can do. Nothing.'
***Fin***
'What are you doing?' Mark asked Rachel as he walked into the lounge, trying to break the deathly silence that hung over the room.
'Nothing,' she choked out, staring straight ahead.
'Well the TV's on, what are you watching?' Rachel blinked, and looked at the screen. So it was. She didn't remember turning it on. But then she didn't remember leaving the hospital, or coming home. All she remembered was seeing Ella lying on the bed, like a tiny doll, with wires coming from her, like she wasn't a living human being.
'Nothing,' she finally replied. Mark slowly walked over and sat down next to her on the sofa.
'Is there anything you want to talk about?'
'Nothing.' Nothing, everything, anything. She didn't know what she wanted to do. All she wanted to do was tell everyone how sorry she was, but sorry wasn't a strong enough word. There wasn't anything she could do that would make up for this.
This morning everything had been so perfect. Ella was being an absolute angel, and for once Rachel actually felt like she was being allowed to be her sister. She never could have dreamed when she woke up this morning that something like this would happen. Or that it would all be her fault.
She suddenly remembered something she'd said that morning to Elizabeth. 'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick.' She shuddered. If only it was just gastroenteritis that Ella had. 'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick.'
Rachel didn't realise she'd just said her last thought out loud until her father spoke. 'Rachel?' She looked up at him, eyes moist with tears. 'What were you just talking about?'
'Don't get too close, I wouldn't want her getting sick,' she whispered again. 'I didn't want her to get sick. This isn't fair, it's not right.' Her words were barely audible, not really being spoken to anyone but herself.
'Talk to me Rachel.' Mark worried about her. One of his daughters was at County General, critically ill, and the other was sat here next to him, looking on the verge of a possible depression.
Rachel's eyes filled up with tears for the umpteenth time that day. She'd done something terrible: something she could never do anything to repay the hurt and emotion everyone was feeling because of. As she shook with the sobs that were wracking her body, she threw herself into her father's arms. 'I've done so much wrong, and now there's nothing I can do. Nothing.'
***Fin***