Chapter Twenty-Two

(One Week Later... Graduation Day)

Belle stood outside the Brady Pub and peered nervously through the windows. She saw almost the entire Brady and Horton families packed inside, along with nearly everyone else who knew them. Most of them had come straight from the graduation ceremony to the pub, but Belle had taken her time. In fact, she was still unsure as to whether or not she wanted to be here at all.

She felt a tap on her shoulder and whirled around to face Brady and Chloe. "Hey you two... Arriving fashionably late?"

Brady nodded and grinned at Chloe. Belle nearly giggled at the sight of them, they were still in that phase where they were exploring the newness of their relationship, and relished every moment they had alone. "Yeah, I had to take Chloe to one of our special places so I could congratulate her privately, before we moved on to the big Brady-Horton shindig."

Chloe grinned back at Brady and then turned to Belle. "So, are you going to go in or just stand here and watch from afar?"

Belle shrugged in confusion. "I don't know. I just... Things are not good with Shawn and I, and I just don't want graduation day to be marred by all of that."

"Then don't let it. Every single person you've ever known is in there right now, including your own family. So, talk to them, you don't have to talk to Shawn. And, if you do... Just say congratulations and move on. You don't have to turn this into a bigger deal than it is."

Belle sighed softly and nodded. "I guess you're right. But if you see me from across the room, and I don't look well... rescue me?"

Brady nodded and threw an arm around his sister's shoulder. "Of course. Now let's go."

The three of them walked in together, and their arrival was greeted by applause and shouts of congratulations. Most of them directed towards Chloe and the eloquent valedictory speech she had given at the ceremony. Belle spotted Mimi and Phillip across the room and made a direct beeline towards them, avoiding the inevitable.

Mimi grinned at Belle. "It's just like the three of you to show up fashionably late."

Belle shrugged nonchalantly. "It took a lot for me to even show up here at all, Mimi."

Phillip smiled at her and nodded in understanding. "But, we're all glad that you did. It wouldn't be a party without you."

Mimi nodded in agreement, but her attention was diverted by something behind Belle. "Oh, excuse me. Kevin is here. I'll be right back."

Belle watched her go to greet Kevin and then turned back to Phillip. "So, did you break the news to your dad about your road trip plans?"

"Last night."

"And how did he take it?"

Phillip smiled slightly. "Surprisingly well, actually. I think he kind of understands it. My dad grew up poor, so he learned to appreciate the life he built for himself. I never have had to understand the value of a dollar or a hard day's work. He said something like, sometimes when you are born with all the advantages in the world it can be a disadvantage."

Belle nodded and smiled proudly. "Wow... That's good. And what about your mom?"

"Oh, you know my mom. She'd be proud of me no matter what I did. But, she's worried for my safety and my health of course."

"Of course. That's what moms do. So, when are you leaving?"

Phillip hesitated with his reply. "Tomorrow."

Belle blinked her eyes rapidly and took a step back. "Tomorrow? As in the day that comes after this day ends? That soon?"

"Yeah, pretty much. I thought it'd be better to do it sooner than later."

"But, Phillip... We have the whole summer to hang out. You should at least stay for awhile."

Phillip shook his head sadly. "No, I can't. I've got everything packed up and ready to go. Just some clothes, my guitar and enough to pay for gas for the first leg of the journey."

Belle's shoulders slumped sadly. "And a pencil and paper right? You have to keep in touch. You have my address here, and I'll give you my address in New York for the fall."

"Of course I will keep in touch. My mom insisted that I take plenty of calling cards, so that I could call home if I needed anything. I'll call, I'll write... I'll be around."

Belle stuck out her lower lip and pouted. "Oh, Phillip... I'm going to miss you so much."

Phillip hugged her tightly and nodded. "Not as much as I'm going to miss you."

Belle leaned out of the hug and shook her head. "You want to argue about that? I think it's a pretty tight race."

"Well, you're going to be with Chloe in New York, and your family will be visiting you all the time I'm sure. I'm going to be alone with only letters and phone calls to keep me company."

"Awww... Don't make me cry. Not today. This sucks. Do you promise you'll come back to Salem for the summer next year?"

Phillip nodded and crossed his heart with his index finger. "I swear I will come home for the summer and spend it with my friends."

Belle smiled happily. "And do you promise you'll at least try to come visit me in New York once?"

"I promise I will try."

"Okay, you're off the hook. Just take care of yourself, okay?"

Phillip grinned at her. "You too."

Mimi returned with Kevin in tow, and Belle excused herself to grab something to drink. She was about to return to her friends with her cup of punch when Hope stopped her. Hope hugged her and smiled brightly at her.

"Belle, I'm so glad you decided to come."

Belle smiled uneasily and nodded. "Well, I almost didn't. But, everyone here is like family to me, and I couldn't let them down. I couldn't let Shawn down."

"Well, Shawn is upstairs with Zack, but he should be down in a minute. I know he'll be really happy to see you here."

"Good, I want to congratulate him and everything. How is he doing anyway? Is he growing closer to Zack yet?"

Hope nodded affirmatively. "You know Shawn. He's always going to miss J.T. and be hurt by that, but he's got a great heart with plenty of room to love Zack as well. And, he is really starting to."

Belle's smile grew. "Well, Zack is really lucky to have him. He's a great big brother."

"Yes, yes he is." Hope paused and looked over Belle's shoulder. "If you'll excuse me, my husband is signaling to me."

"Of course."

"Congratulations, Belle... and I am really glad that you're here."

Belle smiled and watched Hope go towards her husband. She turned back to find her friends, but was intercepted by her parents. "Mom, Dad... Hi there."

Marlena looked at her curiously. "You got here a little late? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, mom. Everything is fine. I just wanted to take a little walk to clear my head before I had to come here and face the music."

John put a comforting hand on his daughter's arm. "It's important enough that you're here at all. You don't HAVE to speak to him."

Belle nodded slowly and then smiled. "I know. But, I think I want to. I think I have to."

Marlena smiled and put an arm around Belle's shoulder. "Good, I think it will be good for both of you."

Belle sighed softly and saw Shawn enter from the stairwell, holding Zack in his arms. He caught her gaze and a slight smile crept on to his face. Bo and Hope directed him over to the center of the room, and Bo tried to grab the attention of the room. The party guests quieted down to listen to the small family in the center of the pub.

Bo cleared his throat and began to speak. "Hello, hello... It's been a year of ups and downs for most of us, but we are so glad to be here again at the pub celebrating another happy occasion. First off, we have to congratulate our eldest son Shawn on all of his hard work. But, this party isn't just for Shawn. It's for all of the graduates here today. You've all worked so hard, and come so far, and you're all like family to us. We're very proud of you, the class of 2002."

Hope smiled brightly and linked arms with her husbands. She raised her glass and everyone followed. "So, we propose a toast to all of you and the bright and wonderful futures that you are destined to have."

Belle raised her glass as everyone toasted and took a sip of her punch. She saw Shawn hand off Zack to his mother, and Belle took a deep breath in.

Belle exchanged a glance with her parents and muttered quietly, "Here I go..."

She made her way through the crowd and greeted Shawn with a nervous smile. "Hey..."

Shawn smiled back at her. "So you're not avoiding me?"

"Avoiding you? No, no, I'm not..."

"I sat right next to you for an entire graduation ceremony and you didn't say a word to me."

Belle sighed and glanced away for a second. "I'm not avoiding you at all. I have things I want to say to you, but none of them were appropriate to say at graduation. Besides, I needed a little time to put the words together."

Shawn nodded in understanding. "Is this something you are ready to talk about now?"

"Definitely. Plus, I want to give you your graduation gift."

"Okay, I have something for you too. Let me grab it, and I'll meet you outside... where there is less noise."

Belle nodded and headed outside to wait for him. She took a quick glance in her purse to make sure that Shawn's gift was still inside. Belle leaned nervously against one of the outdoor posts and inhaled sharply. Shawn returned holding a small blue gift bag. He closed the door behind him and walked tentatively towards her. Shawn handed the bag to her with a smile.

"Here... I thought I should get you something that would remind you of home for when you're in New York. It's nothing big."

Belle smiled at him and gingerly pulled out the white tissue. She lifted the gift out. It was a small wooden jewelry box with a hand painted top. The painting was of an aerial view of Salem's skyline, and Belle's smile widened as she ran her fingers over it.

"Shawn... Oh my God... It's beautiful."

"I had it custom made from a postcard I saw in Salem Place. It's so that no matter where you go, you'll always have Salem with you." Shawn paused and lifted the lid for her. "That's not all either."

Belle looked inside the velvet lined box curiously and saw a folded up piece of white paper. She gently removed it and unfolded it. It was a handwritten copy of Hope Brady's ginger snap recipe.

"Your mom's cookie recipe? Wow..."

"Yeah, I figured it was another piece of home that you wouldn't be able to survive without. It was hard to get her to give up the secret recipe, but I told her it was for you, and she was happy to do it."

Belle grinned at him and chuckled softly. "But, Shawn... I'm a terrible cook."

Shawn laughed and nodded in agreement. "I know. Believe me, I know. But, Chloe isn't. And, if she's truly your best friend, she'll be happy to make them for you whenever you feel a little sad or lonely."

"Well, thank you... so much. It's absolutely perfect."

"You're welcome."

Belle put the box in the bag and laid the bag on the railing. She opened her purse and pulled out a small white box and handed it to Shawn. He grinned boyishly and Belle nearly laughed at his facial expression. It was the same one he had always had when he was getting ready to open a present, the one that always brought her back to Christmas and birthday parties of their childhood.

Shawn lifted the lid and pulled the gold pocket watch out of the box. Belle smiled slightly and stammered. "I know it's kind of become a cliché to give someone a pocket watch, but I really liked this one when I saw it... I actually bought it like six months ago, and had it engraved then. I guess I should really stop planning ahead for these kinds of things."

Shawn opened the watch and read the engraving out loud. "To Shawn, All my love, Belle."

Belle felt a lump form in her throat as he read it out loud. She fought back a tear and continued on. "See? I bought it before everything happened... But, I guess it still means something, because I'm always going to care about you. Right?"

Shawn nodded in agreement and stared as the second hand made it's way around the dial. "Of course. I love it, Belle. Thank you. It's an hour fast though."

Belle shook her head. "No, it's not. It's on New York time actually. That kind of leads into the second part of the gift."

"The second part?"

"Yeah, uhm... This has all been so hard on the both of us. Everything that we've been through. And, I know how sorry you are for what happened..."

Shawn nodded enthusiastically. "I am... I would do anything to fix things between us."

Belle sighed and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "I know. And, that's why the second part of your gift is my forgiveness."

"You're forgiving me?"

"Yes, I am. I didn't think I had it in me, but I've realized a few things. And I know that I need to do this as much as you need it. So, I forgive you. I understand what happened, and as wrong as it was, I forgive you. I just needed you to know that."

Shawn drew in a breath of surprise. "I don't even know what to say. Thank you. I still don't understand how I ever deserved to have a person like you in my life. But, I plan on trying every day to live up to the challenge of being a person deserving of your forgiveness. Your words... mean so much to me."

Belle smiled and nodded in understanding. "I know. I also know that you are an amazing person, and you deserve a lot more than you think you do. Even the best people make mistakes and cause people pain, but as long as you've learned from it... You can still be the man that you were always meant to be."

"I did learn. The only good thing that has come out of all of this is what I've learned about myself, and life, and everything. I wish that it didn't have to come at the cost of what it did to you..."

"I know you do. But you can't change the past, you just have to live with what happened and move on. That's where the watch comes in." Belle paused and took a deep breath in. "I set the time to New York time for a reason, Shawn. That way, wherever you are, you'll always know what time it is where I am. I can't forget what happened, but we can put it behind us and be friends again. We've been through so much in our lives, and the one thing that has always remained constant is our friendship. I'm not ready to lose that too."

Shawn nodded and looked towards the ground sadly. "Friends? That's all?"

Belle sighed softly and stepped closer to him. She placed her hands on his and nodded. "I'm sorry. That's all I have to give right now. It's all I can give. I love you, Shawn, and no matter what happens, that will never change. But, I can't be with you. Not yet, maybe never... I don't know. I need time to sort out things, figure out what I'm doing with my life... be without a boyfriend."

"I understand. But, that doesn't mean I'm going to give up on us."

"I don't expect you to. I'm not saying there's no hope for us, I'm just saying I need time to figure things out. But, please, promise me that you will always be my friend. I need you in my life in some capacity forever, and right now, I need your friendship the most."

Shawn opened his arms and Belle instinctively leaned into him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and smiled. "Of course. I will always be your best friend, no matter what happens. You will never lose me, Belle."

Belle held on to him tightly, afraid that if she let go he would vanish into thin air. It had been too long she had felt Shawn's warm embrace, and as soon as he wrapped his arms around her, she knew exactly why she had forgiven him.

Belle leaned out of the embrace and grinned at him. "You know... I haven't even asked you what you're going to do now that high school is over. Did you reconsider about going to Pepperdine?"

Shawn let go of her and shook his head. "No, I'm not going all the way to California. Not right now. Zack just came into our lives, and I think it's best that I stay here and be with my family. So, I'm going to go to Salem University."

"Well, I'm sure Mimi will be thrilled to hear that. She thought she'd be stuck here all alone. And, I'm glad too. California is way too far. Now you can come visit us in New York whenever Mimi and Brady come up"

"That's only if Brady can stand to be in the same room as me without wanting to pummel me again."

Belle cringed slightly. "I'll work on that, I promise. If I can forgive you, so can Brady. He was only pummeling you because I wouldn't."

Shawn nodded, remembering the pain that Brady had inflicted. "I deserved it, I really did. So, is this our new beginning? Our fresh start?"

"No, I don't think so. You and I could never have a completely clean slate. I can't forget our past, the good or the bad. I think it's more of a second chance."

"A second chance, huh? I like the sound of it."

Belle smiled happily. "Me too. And, we have the whole summer to rebuild our friendship. I say we should definitely make the most of it."

Shawn smiled back at her and nodded in agreement. "We will. Thank you, Belle... for what you've done today."

Belle hugged him again and nodded over his shoulder. "I'm just as glad as you are, believe me."

The door to the pub opened and Jennifer peaked her head around it. "Shawn... Belle... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt something."

Shawn let go of Belle and turned to face her. "No, that's okay. What do you need?"

Jennifer smiled, clearly feeling awkward at having caught them at a tender moment. "Your mom... She's looking for you, that's all."

Shawn nodded as Jennifer went back inside. He turned to look at Belle. "Are you coming in?"

"Go ahead. I'll be right there."

Shawn left her alone and Belle leaned against the post with a sigh. She was unsure of what her future might hold, but instead of being afraid she was filled with excitement. It didn't matter where her life would take her as long as she had her friends and family by her side.

***

(Would it be too corny if I wrote two endings to the Shelle/Phelle story to appease everyone? I think I might have to. This is the most agonizing ending I've ever had to write, I think.)