Disclaimer: I don't own anything… Everything I own is rubbish.
Taking their places, James and Peter stood at their ends of the triangle.
"Alright, lets get furry. James, if you please."
"Animagi we become!
Bound by the blood
And the brotherhood of the wand
Three different forms
We three must take
One, a stag, in honour of his muse
One, a rat to be put to good use
And lastly, a dog, to complete the ruse!" James said, motioning for the other two to point their wands to the midpoint. When the incantation was said, the wands expelled a blue light that covered the roof deck. Remus dashed over to the side, looking over to see if anybody was lurking the grounds. Satisfied, he averted his attention back to the spell.
Taking the whole scene into focus, Remus saw his friends taking on different forms. Sirius' nose was getting broader and his facial hair was getting coarser. James' face was getting longer and his head was getting two bumps where antlers should be. Peter was getting more sinister by the second. His eyes took on a luminous quality and his teeth became pointed. Remus stood aghast.
'Peter looks so much like a rat, it's uncanny!' He thought, surprised.
Quite unexpectedly, the blue light fizzled out, and the three of them were left looking like half-formed animals.
"Sirius! I told you we needed the potion! Now were stuck as the human sideshow of the year!" James yelled, crossing the triangle, spreading the detergent across the deck like sand.
"Well, why didn't I think of that when I was UNCONSCIOUS AND BLEEDING FROM THE HEAD? YOU WANNA EXPLAIN THAT TO ME James?"
"There is no need to get stentorian, Sirius. I seriously dislike wading through your deluge of spittle." James said, very dangerously, very quietly.
"Now, both of you stop that. The whole problem lies with me. I should've used the sorcerers sand. Sirius is right; the potion is only for when you want the transformation to be temporary. Now, I will find the sand, just don't move."
"Remus, we can't do the whole thing over. It's nearly dawn and the first years have an early class up here." James sighed.
"Look at me! I can't go to class like this!" Peter cried, stamping his fat foot and pouting.
"Shut up Peter, you great twat. We all look abnormal so don't stick yourself out on a limb." Sirius spat, quite angry.
"All of you! Listen to me. Madame Pomfrey is sworn to secrecy. She won't tell the student populace that you all look like animals and besides, the teachers don't really mind you being out of class. They hardly ever see you."
"Remus, this is no time to kid around. But I believe that we simply must go to Madame Pomfrey."
"Alright chaps, onward!" James cried, raising his fist in the air.
Laughing at James, Sirius took up the cause and marched behind him, extending his fist to an incoherent beat.
Back at the infirmary, James and Sirius lay awake, the animalistic characteristics dying down.
"So, I take it you spat out your draught for dreamless sleep as well?"
"Yup. Looks like poor little peter was the only one stupid enough to take it."
"Indeed. So, do you really think that Remus'll find the sand?"
"I'm sure Professor Jigger has some in his stock. If not, Professor Malfoy, Professor Waffling, or even Professor Spore would have some."
"True, true. But James, I'm worried. What if we can't revert to our original human states?"
"I've discovered a loophole for that. McGonagall is an Animagus. She just concentrates really hard then she turns into a cat. Now, we just have to think really hard and turn back into humans."
"I don't think its that easy. Otherwise, the ministry wouldn't oversee all the Animagus Transformations."
"It has to be. We all have a patron, remember?"
"Fat lot of good that little statue is going to do us when we're stuck as animals though."
"Well, I suppose that other people don't have patrons and have to do it all on their own. I'll see if we can just call on her to help out when we're in a tight spot."
"I suppose. But we really have to get this thing ironed out. If not, we could die. I read it somewhere."
"I never thought I'd see the day when Sirius Black admitted being scared. Wow, this is one helluva milestone."
"Shut up, James." Sirius smiled, then turned over to his side.
"Aw, Sirius. Don't sulk, I didn't mean it!"
His back still turned, Sirius called over, "Go to sleep James. The antlers will go away, I promise!"
Back in Defense against the Dark Arts Class, Remus took a seat next to Lily and leaned over.
"Thanks for the detergent. It didn't work though. The procedure stopped halfway through, leaving them in half-formed animal shapes."
"Oh dear, is Sirius alright?"
"Sirius? Why are you asking about him?" Remus asked, giving Lily a sidelong glance.
Laughing, Lily punched Remus lightheartedly on the arm.
"Don't look at me like that Remus. I know very well that you and James can take care of yourselves, I don't care very much for Pettigrew, so it just leaves Sirius. He always was the baby of the group. So, did he hurt himself?"
"Not at all. In fact he was busy having a screaming match with James on the roof." They both snickered and laughed out loud. Professor Malfoy stopped his lecture in the middle and looked at the both of them with severe distaste.
"Mr. Lupin. It doesn't become you to be a delinquent. Please report to my office for your detention after class. And please remind Mr. Black that his detention is still pending. His sentence will become heavier because he neglected his duty to attend classes."
"Professor, may I be so bold as to inquire what I did to merit detention?"
"You were deliberately disrupting my lecture. Now, please exit my class so I may continue to lecture in peace."
"Yes sir." Picking up his books, Remus headed for the door.
Walking heavily down the corridor, Remus turned around to hear
"Remus! Remus, wait! I got sent out too! Girl trouble I told him." Lily caught up with Remus and stated walking in stride. "I just really wanted to talk."
"Why Lily, you're turning into a right little miscreant!"
"Well, you spend six years with the Marauders, it tends to rub off on you."
"Marauders? Is that what the general public calls us?"
"Yes. And the teachers and Madame Rosemerta and Hagrid and everybody else."
"Even me?"
"Yes. You, my dear Remus, are the reason of the operation. James is the brain, Sirius is the bulk, and Peter is just to make sure that nothing happens to get any of you hurt."
"Nice. So, I heard you're not with Maximillian anymore. Who's your newest conquest?"
"Haven't decided yet. Either James or Sirius."
"James or Sirius? Don't you know that if you chose either one, it would crush the other?"
"Well, I don't look out for them. They don't need me to. Besides, a little competition is good for them. They have become too courteous for comfort."
"Well, that's another way of looking at it, but you really must take into consideration their feelings!"
"Remus, like I said. I'm not their nanny!"
"Okay, okay. I've gotten your point."
"Look, I'm going to visit the infirmary, you want to come?"
"No, I have to get my detention sentence."
"But you have to tell Sirius about his. Come on Remus, just tag along. For me? Please?"
"I could never resist a woman." Remus said with a smile.
"I thought so."
Approaching the infirmary, Lily and Remus heard screaming and laughing. Dashing out of the infirmary, clothed in blankets and fluffy pink slippers, James and Sirius came running out. Intercepted by Remus, James breathlessly laughed and began a chorus of "hail the conquering hero" and dashed down the corridor, his blanket toga flapping behind him.
"James!" Lily yelled, laughing.
Followed closely by Sirius, James ran about the halls sticking his head into the first year classrooms and yelling.
"Looks like we won't be able to talk to them until they run out of steam." Lily smiled.
"Prepare for a long wait. Those boys are so energetic, I get the funny creepy suspicion that they are hyped up on something."
'It s just being a regular sixteen-year-old boy."
"Well what does that make me?"
"Smart enough to construct togas so that don't fall off." Lily said, pointing up the hallway at a shivering James and Sirius. They were both in the hallway in their boxers and fluffy bunny slippers, walking very jerkily towards Remus and Lily. "Come on, let's meet them halfway."
"Whatever you say."
Nearing the middle, Remus saw that his friends were looking rather cold. Taking off his winter cloak, he fastened it around Sirius and James ducked into the cloak alongside him. Sirius looked like a hunchback with a very bad back problem. Feeling sorry for James, lily took off her winter cloak and handed it over. Since James was taller, the cloak only reached to his knees, but he felt reasonably warmer.
"Should've made your togas durable." Remus said, waggling a finger.
"Stop that, Remus. You're turning into a proper teacher!" Sirius managed to say over the din his chattering teeth were making.
"Speaking of teachers Sirius, Professor Malfoy wants us to go to his office immediately for our detention sentences."
"Our? You got one too?"
"Talking in class. I swear that man is getting more preposterous by the year."
"Indeed. Now, do you suppose you could excuse James and I? We need to dress up, you see."
"By all means." Remus said, sweeping his hand back, allowing them to pass.
Ten minutes later James and Sirius walked out to find Remus sans Lily.
"She had to go back to class. I however, don't feel the need to. Shall we take a walk?"
"No, I'll catch up with you two later. I should get to class." James said, making for the Gryffindor common room.
"I'll bet. He just wants to see Lily."
"Speaking of James and Lily, she might make him her new conquest you know. Her other option is choosing you."
"Me? But I tease her to no end! Is she masochistic or something?"
"Could be. But I think that she just really wants some good natured—"
"—Sex! That's got to be it."
"Sirius!" Remus reprimanded, flashing a sharp look at his companion.
"What? Don't all girls think like that?"
"None that I've met, surely. Oh, Professor Malfoy, we are here, as promised."
"Good, good. Now, Mr. Lupin, you and Mr. Black shall clean out my cupboard and then Mr. Black shall report to Hagrid for the rest of his detention."
"Yes sir." they intoned, both downhearted and gloomy.
Summoning a scrub brush, a duster, and a pail of soapy water apiece, the two of them began pulling out the assorted things and giving them a good clean. Remus was halfway through his side of the cupboard when Sirius nudged him and pointed to the label on one of Professor Malfoy's vials. It read, "Sorcerers sand, highly dangerous and highly valuable. Use as required." Glancing around furtively, Sirius pocketed the vial and continued with his work.
"Sirius, that won't be enough." Remus said, sotto voce.
"Why not?"
"We have to make that triangle, remember? Ask Malfoy if you can clean out Professor Jigger's cupboard too."
"Won't he find it odd?"
"That git is too thick to notice anything out of the ordinary. He's just manipulative which makes him come off smart."
"Alright."
"Professor Malfoy?" Sirius asked, tentatively.
"What is it, boy? Can't you see that I have work to be done?"
"Well sir, I was just wondering if I could clean Professor Jigger's cupboard too. It does look a frightful mess and since I'm at it, can I clean up Professor Spore's as well?"
"Yes you may, but keep quiet. I have reports to grade."
"Yes sir."
Sirius returned to Remus at Malfoy's cupboard.
"If Jigger is still lacking, we can search Spore's."
"Alright. But won't Hagrid get mad that you're late for your earlier scheduled detention?"
"Blame it on Malfoy, I suppose."
Moving onto Professor Jigger's cupboard, Remus and Sirius found a book of potions, which held the recipe for the permanent Animagi spell.
"I don't want to become an animal permanently."
"You won't. It says Animagi spell. Not animal spell. I suppose this is to speed up transformation."
"Is that wise? Remus, what if something goes wrong?"
"Well, did it hurt when you transformed?"
"Very much so. It was like I was growing my leg again."
"What?"
"Oh, last year I fell through a hole in the stair case and broke my leg. Thinking I could fix it myself, I put a spell on it, then all the bones disappeared. I had a rubber leg for two days."
Snorting with glee, Remus buried his head in his arms to keep from distracting Malfoy.
"Shut up, you!" Sirius said, fondly.
"Well, that's done. And we now have a vial and a pint of sorcerer's sand. Highly valuable, my arse."
"Do we really need to clean out Spore's?"
"Just give it a quick dust and then we'll head out to Hagrid's hut, I suppose."
Hearing a noise in the doorway, Remus and Sirius looked up and saw a black figure making its way across the corridor, weaving in and out of the students which seemed to be oblivious to it.
Taking their places, James and Peter stood at their ends of the triangle.
"Alright, lets get furry. James, if you please."
"Animagi we become!
Bound by the blood
And the brotherhood of the wand
Three different forms
We three must take
One, a stag, in honour of his muse
One, a rat to be put to good use
And lastly, a dog, to complete the ruse!" James said, motioning for the other two to point their wands to the midpoint. When the incantation was said, the wands expelled a blue light that covered the roof deck. Remus dashed over to the side, looking over to see if anybody was lurking the grounds. Satisfied, he averted his attention back to the spell.
Taking the whole scene into focus, Remus saw his friends taking on different forms. Sirius' nose was getting broader and his facial hair was getting coarser. James' face was getting longer and his head was getting two bumps where antlers should be. Peter was getting more sinister by the second. His eyes took on a luminous quality and his teeth became pointed. Remus stood aghast.
'Peter looks so much like a rat, it's uncanny!' He thought, surprised.
Quite unexpectedly, the blue light fizzled out, and the three of them were left looking like half-formed animals.
"Sirius! I told you we needed the potion! Now were stuck as the human sideshow of the year!" James yelled, crossing the triangle, spreading the detergent across the deck like sand.
"Well, why didn't I think of that when I was UNCONSCIOUS AND BLEEDING FROM THE HEAD? YOU WANNA EXPLAIN THAT TO ME James?"
"There is no need to get stentorian, Sirius. I seriously dislike wading through your deluge of spittle." James said, very dangerously, very quietly.
"Now, both of you stop that. The whole problem lies with me. I should've used the sorcerers sand. Sirius is right; the potion is only for when you want the transformation to be temporary. Now, I will find the sand, just don't move."
"Remus, we can't do the whole thing over. It's nearly dawn and the first years have an early class up here." James sighed.
"Look at me! I can't go to class like this!" Peter cried, stamping his fat foot and pouting.
"Shut up Peter, you great twat. We all look abnormal so don't stick yourself out on a limb." Sirius spat, quite angry.
"All of you! Listen to me. Madame Pomfrey is sworn to secrecy. She won't tell the student populace that you all look like animals and besides, the teachers don't really mind you being out of class. They hardly ever see you."
"Remus, this is no time to kid around. But I believe that we simply must go to Madame Pomfrey."
"Alright chaps, onward!" James cried, raising his fist in the air.
Laughing at James, Sirius took up the cause and marched behind him, extending his fist to an incoherent beat.
Back at the infirmary, James and Sirius lay awake, the animalistic characteristics dying down.
"So, I take it you spat out your draught for dreamless sleep as well?"
"Yup. Looks like poor little peter was the only one stupid enough to take it."
"Indeed. So, do you really think that Remus'll find the sand?"
"I'm sure Professor Jigger has some in his stock. If not, Professor Malfoy, Professor Waffling, or even Professor Spore would have some."
"True, true. But James, I'm worried. What if we can't revert to our original human states?"
"I've discovered a loophole for that. McGonagall is an Animagus. She just concentrates really hard then she turns into a cat. Now, we just have to think really hard and turn back into humans."
"I don't think its that easy. Otherwise, the ministry wouldn't oversee all the Animagus Transformations."
"It has to be. We all have a patron, remember?"
"Fat lot of good that little statue is going to do us when we're stuck as animals though."
"Well, I suppose that other people don't have patrons and have to do it all on their own. I'll see if we can just call on her to help out when we're in a tight spot."
"I suppose. But we really have to get this thing ironed out. If not, we could die. I read it somewhere."
"I never thought I'd see the day when Sirius Black admitted being scared. Wow, this is one helluva milestone."
"Shut up, James." Sirius smiled, then turned over to his side.
"Aw, Sirius. Don't sulk, I didn't mean it!"
His back still turned, Sirius called over, "Go to sleep James. The antlers will go away, I promise!"
Back in Defense against the Dark Arts Class, Remus took a seat next to Lily and leaned over.
"Thanks for the detergent. It didn't work though. The procedure stopped halfway through, leaving them in half-formed animal shapes."
"Oh dear, is Sirius alright?"
"Sirius? Why are you asking about him?" Remus asked, giving Lily a sidelong glance.
Laughing, Lily punched Remus lightheartedly on the arm.
"Don't look at me like that Remus. I know very well that you and James can take care of yourselves, I don't care very much for Pettigrew, so it just leaves Sirius. He always was the baby of the group. So, did he hurt himself?"
"Not at all. In fact he was busy having a screaming match with James on the roof." They both snickered and laughed out loud. Professor Malfoy stopped his lecture in the middle and looked at the both of them with severe distaste.
"Mr. Lupin. It doesn't become you to be a delinquent. Please report to my office for your detention after class. And please remind Mr. Black that his detention is still pending. His sentence will become heavier because he neglected his duty to attend classes."
"Professor, may I be so bold as to inquire what I did to merit detention?"
"You were deliberately disrupting my lecture. Now, please exit my class so I may continue to lecture in peace."
"Yes sir." Picking up his books, Remus headed for the door.
Walking heavily down the corridor, Remus turned around to hear
"Remus! Remus, wait! I got sent out too! Girl trouble I told him." Lily caught up with Remus and stated walking in stride. "I just really wanted to talk."
"Why Lily, you're turning into a right little miscreant!"
"Well, you spend six years with the Marauders, it tends to rub off on you."
"Marauders? Is that what the general public calls us?"
"Yes. And the teachers and Madame Rosemerta and Hagrid and everybody else."
"Even me?"
"Yes. You, my dear Remus, are the reason of the operation. James is the brain, Sirius is the bulk, and Peter is just to make sure that nothing happens to get any of you hurt."
"Nice. So, I heard you're not with Maximillian anymore. Who's your newest conquest?"
"Haven't decided yet. Either James or Sirius."
"James or Sirius? Don't you know that if you chose either one, it would crush the other?"
"Well, I don't look out for them. They don't need me to. Besides, a little competition is good for them. They have become too courteous for comfort."
"Well, that's another way of looking at it, but you really must take into consideration their feelings!"
"Remus, like I said. I'm not their nanny!"
"Okay, okay. I've gotten your point."
"Look, I'm going to visit the infirmary, you want to come?"
"No, I have to get my detention sentence."
"But you have to tell Sirius about his. Come on Remus, just tag along. For me? Please?"
"I could never resist a woman." Remus said with a smile.
"I thought so."
Approaching the infirmary, Lily and Remus heard screaming and laughing. Dashing out of the infirmary, clothed in blankets and fluffy pink slippers, James and Sirius came running out. Intercepted by Remus, James breathlessly laughed and began a chorus of "hail the conquering hero" and dashed down the corridor, his blanket toga flapping behind him.
"James!" Lily yelled, laughing.
Followed closely by Sirius, James ran about the halls sticking his head into the first year classrooms and yelling.
"Looks like we won't be able to talk to them until they run out of steam." Lily smiled.
"Prepare for a long wait. Those boys are so energetic, I get the funny creepy suspicion that they are hyped up on something."
'It s just being a regular sixteen-year-old boy."
"Well what does that make me?"
"Smart enough to construct togas so that don't fall off." Lily said, pointing up the hallway at a shivering James and Sirius. They were both in the hallway in their boxers and fluffy bunny slippers, walking very jerkily towards Remus and Lily. "Come on, let's meet them halfway."
"Whatever you say."
Nearing the middle, Remus saw that his friends were looking rather cold. Taking off his winter cloak, he fastened it around Sirius and James ducked into the cloak alongside him. Sirius looked like a hunchback with a very bad back problem. Feeling sorry for James, lily took off her winter cloak and handed it over. Since James was taller, the cloak only reached to his knees, but he felt reasonably warmer.
"Should've made your togas durable." Remus said, waggling a finger.
"Stop that, Remus. You're turning into a proper teacher!" Sirius managed to say over the din his chattering teeth were making.
"Speaking of teachers Sirius, Professor Malfoy wants us to go to his office immediately for our detention sentences."
"Our? You got one too?"
"Talking in class. I swear that man is getting more preposterous by the year."
"Indeed. Now, do you suppose you could excuse James and I? We need to dress up, you see."
"By all means." Remus said, sweeping his hand back, allowing them to pass.
Ten minutes later James and Sirius walked out to find Remus sans Lily.
"She had to go back to class. I however, don't feel the need to. Shall we take a walk?"
"No, I'll catch up with you two later. I should get to class." James said, making for the Gryffindor common room.
"I'll bet. He just wants to see Lily."
"Speaking of James and Lily, she might make him her new conquest you know. Her other option is choosing you."
"Me? But I tease her to no end! Is she masochistic or something?"
"Could be. But I think that she just really wants some good natured—"
"—Sex! That's got to be it."
"Sirius!" Remus reprimanded, flashing a sharp look at his companion.
"What? Don't all girls think like that?"
"None that I've met, surely. Oh, Professor Malfoy, we are here, as promised."
"Good, good. Now, Mr. Lupin, you and Mr. Black shall clean out my cupboard and then Mr. Black shall report to Hagrid for the rest of his detention."
"Yes sir." they intoned, both downhearted and gloomy.
Summoning a scrub brush, a duster, and a pail of soapy water apiece, the two of them began pulling out the assorted things and giving them a good clean. Remus was halfway through his side of the cupboard when Sirius nudged him and pointed to the label on one of Professor Malfoy's vials. It read, "Sorcerers sand, highly dangerous and highly valuable. Use as required." Glancing around furtively, Sirius pocketed the vial and continued with his work.
"Sirius, that won't be enough." Remus said, sotto voce.
"Why not?"
"We have to make that triangle, remember? Ask Malfoy if you can clean out Professor Jigger's cupboard too."
"Won't he find it odd?"
"That git is too thick to notice anything out of the ordinary. He's just manipulative which makes him come off smart."
"Alright."
"Professor Malfoy?" Sirius asked, tentatively.
"What is it, boy? Can't you see that I have work to be done?"
"Well sir, I was just wondering if I could clean Professor Jigger's cupboard too. It does look a frightful mess and since I'm at it, can I clean up Professor Spore's as well?"
"Yes you may, but keep quiet. I have reports to grade."
"Yes sir."
Sirius returned to Remus at Malfoy's cupboard.
"If Jigger is still lacking, we can search Spore's."
"Alright. But won't Hagrid get mad that you're late for your earlier scheduled detention?"
"Blame it on Malfoy, I suppose."
Moving onto Professor Jigger's cupboard, Remus and Sirius found a book of potions, which held the recipe for the permanent Animagi spell.
"I don't want to become an animal permanently."
"You won't. It says Animagi spell. Not animal spell. I suppose this is to speed up transformation."
"Is that wise? Remus, what if something goes wrong?"
"Well, did it hurt when you transformed?"
"Very much so. It was like I was growing my leg again."
"What?"
"Oh, last year I fell through a hole in the stair case and broke my leg. Thinking I could fix it myself, I put a spell on it, then all the bones disappeared. I had a rubber leg for two days."
Snorting with glee, Remus buried his head in his arms to keep from distracting Malfoy.
"Shut up, you!" Sirius said, fondly.
"Well, that's done. And we now have a vial and a pint of sorcerer's sand. Highly valuable, my arse."
"Do we really need to clean out Spore's?"
"Just give it a quick dust and then we'll head out to Hagrid's hut, I suppose."
Hearing a noise in the doorway, Remus and Sirius looked up and saw a black figure making its way across the corridor, weaving in and out of the students which seemed to be oblivious to it.
