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Title: Found in Lost Memories
Author: Court
Fandom: X-Men
Rating: R for now
Status: Now Finsihed, Part 4
Archive: Yes, just e-mail me telling me where.
E-mail: remylebeau@yahoo.com
Disclaimers: All the X-Men are (c)copyright of Marvel Comics.
Summary: Jean helps Logan with his lost memories. What he finds out is that he has a deeper connection with Remy then he ever thought possible.
Warning: This story is Alternate Universe! I took a few liberties with the whole Logan's lost memories and Jean's powers. Talk of non-consensual sex with a minor (rape) and curse words. I also took it easy with the accents.
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"I don't think so" Logan growled and took off after Remy. He wasn't going to let this conversation end like this. He stalked down the hall and into the kitchen and through the back door to the grounds following the familiar smell of Remy mixed with a tint of warm salt. He went half way across the gardens when the trail stopped at an old oak tree in the center of the yard. Hearing small sobs coming from above he raised his head. Looking up into the branches he saw the person he was hunting perched on a large limb.
"Remy please come down, we need to talk about this. I don't remember everything, and I need ya to fill in the pieces. I need to know what I did to ya." he begged.
Remy's eyes came down to look at Logan, evident by the two glowing orbs that now stood out from the darkness of the branches. "What y' did to me? What do y' mean? Y' didn't do anything to me."
With that confession Logan felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his soul, but it didn't answer all his questions, and now it had him wondering the answers to new ones.
"I don't get it Remy, why are ya so scared to talk about this if I didn't hurt ya?" he said looking up. He wished that the kid would come down before he strained his neck.
As if he heard Logan's plea he jumped down from the tree and landed silently next to Logan. He took a seat on the ground and wrapped his arms around his waist as if showing his defeat. He sighed and waited for the questions he didn't want to answer.
Logan took the hint and sat down next to the Cajun in the grass and took a moment to weigh the situation. He could smell the fear coming from the kid, almost identical to the smell from before. He now knew what spooked Remy that morning in the kitchen, the knowledge that he was going to get his memory back, that he was going to remember that night in New Orleans, that he was going to remember him.
"Remy?" he placed his hand on the kid's back to comfort him "Why didn't ya want me to remember that night?"
Remy breathed deeply as if to prepare himself. He was ready to get this over and done with, to tell Logan everything. "When Stormy first introduced y' to me, I thought y' would remember me. I was actually kinda hurt at first that y' didn't know me, even after she told y' my name."
"I'm sorry, I didn't" Logan was stopped by a wave of Remy's hand signalling him to let him finish.
Remy continued "I understand now Logan. Stormy told me about the whole Weapon X thing and your memories being taken 'way. After awhile I was relieved that y' didn't remember me."
Logan interrupted again "That the part I don't understand Remy, why didn't ya want me to remember ya?"
Remy sighed and began again.
"After a while I got to know y' and the others better, started looking at y' like family. But if y' remembered that night y' would tell the others 'bout what I did" Remy began to cry and his words started to ramble almost incoherently. "I didn't want them to know, I didn't want y' to remember. Now y' know and y' won't want me near y' and neither will the others. Everyone already thinks I'm a whore, now they will know it's the truth. Y' will only see me as some dirty street whore and y' will never want me." he finally stopped when he began to sob so hard he couldn't talk.
Logan pulled him into his lap and held him tightly. "Oh God Remy, is this what ya were afraid of? I would never think of you like that, ever! What happened wasn't your fault, that doesn't make you a whore, it makes you a victim. Ya were a hungry kid and the bastard took advantage of that. Ya didn't know what he was going to do. Its not your fault" he continued to cradle Remy's head to his chest and rocked back and forth slowly, trying to calm him down.
"Y' don't get it Logan" Remy yelled as he jerked away from the embrace. "I am a whore! Yea, your right, I didn't know what he was going to do that time. But I did the next time, and the time after that. I was hungry and that was the only way to get the money I needed for food. I knew y' told me to stay away from all of it, I tried for so long, but I had no choice in the end. Everyday I hoped that someone like y' would come to me again, take me in, and not want to hurt or use me, but it didn't happen until Poppa. I am just a good for nothing whore like every one says." the last word came out in an agonizing whisper.
Logan covered the distance between them and took Remy's face between his hands.
"Remy look at me." he ordered.
Remy finally looked up at Logan with tear filled eyes and Logan continued. "You are NOT a whore, you hear me. You were a victim of a situation you should have never been put into. I don't blame you for anything that happened when you were a child, you understand. I don't think any less of you now then I did before I remembered. If anything I have stronger feelings now then I did. I love ya Remy and nothing will change that."
As if proving his point Logan pulled Remy's face to his, gently bringing their lips together. Remy tensed for a moment and then melted into Logan's mouth deepening the kiss, never wanting it to end. Logan pulled away slowly and looked Remy in the eyes and made him a promise.
"Remy, I don't know how ya ended up back on the streets, but I am sorry I didn't protect you then, but I want to now. I promise you that nothing like that will ever happen to ya again, I won't let it. I love ya. Fate has given me a second chance to have ya with me, and I sure as hell ain't going to let it pass me by this time. Please give me a chance to love ya like you should be?"
"I left Logan." seeing the look of confusion on Logan's face he explained. "That is why I ended up on the streets again. I left, I told myself that I was getting too comfortable and that it was only a matter of time before y' left me on the streets again. I thought, at the time, that I would be better off leaving myself then have y' leave me." He paused and looked Logan in the eye with a loving smile. "But fate has given ME a second chance to be with y', and I won't let it pass me by either. Je t'aime Logan" he finished by pulling Logan into another deep kiss, savouring every second.
Logan pulled away from the kiss and stood, pulling Remy up with him. He began leading Remy towards the house by an arm around his waist. "Come on kid, lets get inside, its been a long night and I need some sleep and so do you. Ya can sleep in my room tonight if ya want, would like the company."
"I would like that Logan, I like y' close" he said before stealing a quick kiss from Logan's lips.
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Logan and Remy made there way up the stairs towards Logan's room. Suddenly Logan stopped right outside the Summer's bedroom.
"What's wrong Logan?" Remy questioned quietly, careful not to wake the couple on the other side of the door.
"Nothin Rem, just need to do something. Why don't ya go grab some clothes and things from your room and meet me in mine. I will be there in a few minutes. Get the bed warm for me?" he grinned and gave Remy a quick kiss.
"Ok, but don't be to long, I'm tired and I want to fall asleep with y'" he yawned confirming his statement.
"I'll only be a few minutes" he promised.
With that Remy stole another kiss and made his way up the last flight of stairs towards his room. Once Remy was out of sight he softly knocked on the bedroom door in front of him.
"Jeannie?" he said softly.
"Come in Logan" came the mental reply.
Logan opened the door quietly and let his eyes adjust to the dark room.
"Is something wrong?" Jean asked "Don't worry we can talk, I will keep him asleep" she assured him while leaning over and turning on the small table lamp.
"I need ya to stop the memories Jeannie." he said, getting to the point. He wanted to get this done and get back to Remy.
"What? Why? Did you talk to Remy? Did something happen? Are you ok? Is Remy alright?" she was stopped by Logan's laugh.
"Everything's fine Jeannie, actually everything is better then I could have ever hoped" he could tell she was about to question him again, so he raised his hand to stop her and simply said
"I don't need the old memories anymore, I will make new ones."
She almost asked what he meant by the comment when Logan broadcast her a flash of memory that explained everything. She smiled and patted the corner of the bed next to her. Logan sat down and she raised her hands to either side of the face. Jean entered his mind and changed in minutes what took hours to do, stopping the memories from flowing into his mind. She opened her eyes, dropped her hands to her lap, and smiled at Logan.
"Its done, you will not remember any more of those memories. I can reopen that part of your mind again later if you like, you just have to ask." She could not stop herself from grabbing Logan and pulling him into a hug."You be good to each other, you both deserve to be happy." she whispered softly.
"Don't worry Jeannie, I have him now, I will never let him go" he said while pulling away from the embrace.
"Go on, get back to him! He has waited long enough! Now go." she smiled and jokingly swatted him on the arm.
Logan chuckled and rose from the bed to leave.
"Thanks Jeannie, for everything." he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek and then left the room to get back to Remy.
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Logan opened the door to his room quietly. He was gone longer then he wanted to be and hoped Remy didn't get worried. Walking into the room he noticed the figured curled up under the covers in his bed. Logan stepped out of his clothes and sat down softly on the bed trying not to disturb the sleeping Remy. He sat there for several minutes just watching him sleep. Finally realizing how tired he was he turned out the light and spooned up behind Remy pulling him close in a protective embrace.
"I will never let ya go, never hurt ya, I love ya too much." he confessed quietly.
Remy softly moaned in his sleep and turned over facing Logan pulling himself even closer and tucking his head under Logan's chin. Logan kissed Remy softly on the head and whispered.
"Ya took my heart as a child, and now ya have taken my heart as a man."
With that Logan drifted off into sleep.
THE END
Title: Found in Lost Memories
Author: Court
Fandom: X-Men
Rating: R for now
Status: Now Finsihed, Part 4
Archive: Yes, just e-mail me telling me where.
E-mail: remylebeau@yahoo.com
Disclaimers: All the X-Men are (c)copyright of Marvel Comics.
Summary: Jean helps Logan with his lost memories. What he finds out is that he has a deeper connection with Remy then he ever thought possible.
Warning: This story is Alternate Universe! I took a few liberties with the whole Logan's lost memories and Jean's powers. Talk of non-consensual sex with a minor (rape) and curse words. I also took it easy with the accents.
----------------------------------------------------
"I don't think so" Logan growled and took off after Remy. He wasn't going to let this conversation end like this. He stalked down the hall and into the kitchen and through the back door to the grounds following the familiar smell of Remy mixed with a tint of warm salt. He went half way across the gardens when the trail stopped at an old oak tree in the center of the yard. Hearing small sobs coming from above he raised his head. Looking up into the branches he saw the person he was hunting perched on a large limb.
"Remy please come down, we need to talk about this. I don't remember everything, and I need ya to fill in the pieces. I need to know what I did to ya." he begged.
Remy's eyes came down to look at Logan, evident by the two glowing orbs that now stood out from the darkness of the branches. "What y' did to me? What do y' mean? Y' didn't do anything to me."
With that confession Logan felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his soul, but it didn't answer all his questions, and now it had him wondering the answers to new ones.
"I don't get it Remy, why are ya so scared to talk about this if I didn't hurt ya?" he said looking up. He wished that the kid would come down before he strained his neck.
As if he heard Logan's plea he jumped down from the tree and landed silently next to Logan. He took a seat on the ground and wrapped his arms around his waist as if showing his defeat. He sighed and waited for the questions he didn't want to answer.
Logan took the hint and sat down next to the Cajun in the grass and took a moment to weigh the situation. He could smell the fear coming from the kid, almost identical to the smell from before. He now knew what spooked Remy that morning in the kitchen, the knowledge that he was going to get his memory back, that he was going to remember that night in New Orleans, that he was going to remember him.
"Remy?" he placed his hand on the kid's back to comfort him "Why didn't ya want me to remember that night?"
Remy breathed deeply as if to prepare himself. He was ready to get this over and done with, to tell Logan everything. "When Stormy first introduced y' to me, I thought y' would remember me. I was actually kinda hurt at first that y' didn't know me, even after she told y' my name."
"I'm sorry, I didn't" Logan was stopped by a wave of Remy's hand signalling him to let him finish.
Remy continued "I understand now Logan. Stormy told me about the whole Weapon X thing and your memories being taken 'way. After awhile I was relieved that y' didn't remember me."
Logan interrupted again "That the part I don't understand Remy, why didn't ya want me to remember ya?"
Remy sighed and began again.
"After a while I got to know y' and the others better, started looking at y' like family. But if y' remembered that night y' would tell the others 'bout what I did" Remy began to cry and his words started to ramble almost incoherently. "I didn't want them to know, I didn't want y' to remember. Now y' know and y' won't want me near y' and neither will the others. Everyone already thinks I'm a whore, now they will know it's the truth. Y' will only see me as some dirty street whore and y' will never want me." he finally stopped when he began to sob so hard he couldn't talk.
Logan pulled him into his lap and held him tightly. "Oh God Remy, is this what ya were afraid of? I would never think of you like that, ever! What happened wasn't your fault, that doesn't make you a whore, it makes you a victim. Ya were a hungry kid and the bastard took advantage of that. Ya didn't know what he was going to do. Its not your fault" he continued to cradle Remy's head to his chest and rocked back and forth slowly, trying to calm him down.
"Y' don't get it Logan" Remy yelled as he jerked away from the embrace. "I am a whore! Yea, your right, I didn't know what he was going to do that time. But I did the next time, and the time after that. I was hungry and that was the only way to get the money I needed for food. I knew y' told me to stay away from all of it, I tried for so long, but I had no choice in the end. Everyday I hoped that someone like y' would come to me again, take me in, and not want to hurt or use me, but it didn't happen until Poppa. I am just a good for nothing whore like every one says." the last word came out in an agonizing whisper.
Logan covered the distance between them and took Remy's face between his hands.
"Remy look at me." he ordered.
Remy finally looked up at Logan with tear filled eyes and Logan continued. "You are NOT a whore, you hear me. You were a victim of a situation you should have never been put into. I don't blame you for anything that happened when you were a child, you understand. I don't think any less of you now then I did before I remembered. If anything I have stronger feelings now then I did. I love ya Remy and nothing will change that."
As if proving his point Logan pulled Remy's face to his, gently bringing their lips together. Remy tensed for a moment and then melted into Logan's mouth deepening the kiss, never wanting it to end. Logan pulled away slowly and looked Remy in the eyes and made him a promise.
"Remy, I don't know how ya ended up back on the streets, but I am sorry I didn't protect you then, but I want to now. I promise you that nothing like that will ever happen to ya again, I won't let it. I love ya. Fate has given me a second chance to have ya with me, and I sure as hell ain't going to let it pass me by this time. Please give me a chance to love ya like you should be?"
"I left Logan." seeing the look of confusion on Logan's face he explained. "That is why I ended up on the streets again. I left, I told myself that I was getting too comfortable and that it was only a matter of time before y' left me on the streets again. I thought, at the time, that I would be better off leaving myself then have y' leave me." He paused and looked Logan in the eye with a loving smile. "But fate has given ME a second chance to be with y', and I won't let it pass me by either. Je t'aime Logan" he finished by pulling Logan into another deep kiss, savouring every second.
Logan pulled away from the kiss and stood, pulling Remy up with him. He began leading Remy towards the house by an arm around his waist. "Come on kid, lets get inside, its been a long night and I need some sleep and so do you. Ya can sleep in my room tonight if ya want, would like the company."
"I would like that Logan, I like y' close" he said before stealing a quick kiss from Logan's lips.
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Logan and Remy made there way up the stairs towards Logan's room. Suddenly Logan stopped right outside the Summer's bedroom.
"What's wrong Logan?" Remy questioned quietly, careful not to wake the couple on the other side of the door.
"Nothin Rem, just need to do something. Why don't ya go grab some clothes and things from your room and meet me in mine. I will be there in a few minutes. Get the bed warm for me?" he grinned and gave Remy a quick kiss.
"Ok, but don't be to long, I'm tired and I want to fall asleep with y'" he yawned confirming his statement.
"I'll only be a few minutes" he promised.
With that Remy stole another kiss and made his way up the last flight of stairs towards his room. Once Remy was out of sight he softly knocked on the bedroom door in front of him.
"Jeannie?" he said softly.
"Come in Logan" came the mental reply.
Logan opened the door quietly and let his eyes adjust to the dark room.
"Is something wrong?" Jean asked "Don't worry we can talk, I will keep him asleep" she assured him while leaning over and turning on the small table lamp.
"I need ya to stop the memories Jeannie." he said, getting to the point. He wanted to get this done and get back to Remy.
"What? Why? Did you talk to Remy? Did something happen? Are you ok? Is Remy alright?" she was stopped by Logan's laugh.
"Everything's fine Jeannie, actually everything is better then I could have ever hoped" he could tell she was about to question him again, so he raised his hand to stop her and simply said
"I don't need the old memories anymore, I will make new ones."
She almost asked what he meant by the comment when Logan broadcast her a flash of memory that explained everything. She smiled and patted the corner of the bed next to her. Logan sat down and she raised her hands to either side of the face. Jean entered his mind and changed in minutes what took hours to do, stopping the memories from flowing into his mind. She opened her eyes, dropped her hands to her lap, and smiled at Logan.
"Its done, you will not remember any more of those memories. I can reopen that part of your mind again later if you like, you just have to ask." She could not stop herself from grabbing Logan and pulling him into a hug."You be good to each other, you both deserve to be happy." she whispered softly.
"Don't worry Jeannie, I have him now, I will never let him go" he said while pulling away from the embrace.
"Go on, get back to him! He has waited long enough! Now go." she smiled and jokingly swatted him on the arm.
Logan chuckled and rose from the bed to leave.
"Thanks Jeannie, for everything." he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek and then left the room to get back to Remy.
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Logan opened the door to his room quietly. He was gone longer then he wanted to be and hoped Remy didn't get worried. Walking into the room he noticed the figured curled up under the covers in his bed. Logan stepped out of his clothes and sat down softly on the bed trying not to disturb the sleeping Remy. He sat there for several minutes just watching him sleep. Finally realizing how tired he was he turned out the light and spooned up behind Remy pulling him close in a protective embrace.
"I will never let ya go, never hurt ya, I love ya too much." he confessed quietly.
Remy softly moaned in his sleep and turned over facing Logan pulling himself even closer and tucking his head under Logan's chin. Logan kissed Remy softly on the head and whispered.
"Ya took my heart as a child, and now ya have taken my heart as a man."
With that Logan drifted off into sleep.
THE END
