Disclaimer: I don't own anything that isn't mine. All I own are my stories, myself, and my characters. The other authors own themselves and their respective muses. My friends own themselves. Random quotes are owned by whoever said them first. The end.

A/N: OK! The long-awaited 3rd chapter to my revenge fic, Insanity Rules! This chapter, however, is a spur-of-the-moment, random piece of insanity. A few of my friends here in the real world make appearances, so any names you don't recognize as authors are probably them.

Included in this chapter: the infamous Trigun Cat, Plushie Wars, Stupid/Funny/Random Quotes from just about Anything, Attack of the Typos, Chibi-ness spreading like a plague, and Plotholes galore!! WARNING: DANGEROUSLY HIGH INSANITY LEVELS DETECTED! PROCEED WITH EXTREME CAUTION IF YOU WISH TO LEAVE SANE! ^___~

Insanity Rules: Chapter 3

Plushies, Plotholes, and Chaos!

{ Near Midgar, in the FF7 world... }

Kurai: *pops out of porthole* ROOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!! *still beast-formed..* RRAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH!!

Random person: AAAHHHHH! *runs*

Another random person: O_O Holy shit! *runs and knocks into Random person*

both random persons: @_@; *fall down unconscious*

Kurai: ROOOAAAARRR!! *flies into Midgar and starts tearing things apart..*

little black cat nearby: meow.

{ In Takui's world... }

Vincent: *reaches palace, runs inside and grabs a servant* Help!

Servant: O_o; I-Is there a p-problem, s-sir?

Vincent: *pant* Yes! *pant* Kurai..*pant* is *pant* out of *pant* control! *pant gasp* Tell Takui! *gasp pant* Now!!

Servant: o_O; Oh my...right away, sir! *runs off and up several flights of stairs to Takui's quarters..*

Vincent: *pant pant, huff, pant, gasp, pant..* -_-;

Servant: *taps on Takui's door* Madame! Madame! It seems there's a problem that requires your attention! Madame!

voice from inside the room: What is it?!?!?!

Servant: It seems that, uh...according to Vincent, Kurai has gone out of control, madame! What should we do?

other voice inside room: Fix the problem and leave us alone!

Servant: *sweatdrop*..but...it's a very urgent matter, madame!

yet another voice: just leave!

Servant: Uh...madame, may I ask who all is in your company?

first voice: No, you may not! Now leave!

Servant: But...

second voice: NOW!!

Servant: ...um...

third voice: Beat it!

Servant: *thinks, paces, looks at door and tries not to think about the odd sounds coming from behind the door...finally sighs and knocks on door again* Mada--!?

Door: *swings open*

Sephiroth: *standing in doorway, with two, small puncture holes in his neck, and wearing only his black overcoat (tied in front with the belt) and holding his Masamune* What is it?! It had BETTER be important!

Servant: O_O; _; M-My ap-pologies, s-sir! I-I d-didn't know y-you were b-busy, madame! *backs away for fear of his life..*

first voice: Sephiroth! Get back in here!

Sephiroth: You got lucky, server-man! *goes back in the room*

third voice: Can I kill him yet, Takui?

Takui: No, you may not! At least not yet, Legato.

Legato: Too bad...

Servant: O_o; I-I'm v-very sorry m-madame! I had n-no idea you were....

Takui: *comes to door and stands there, leaning on doorframe, wearing a only a very transparent, very short, black, silk robe..* Can't you see I'm busy? What's the problem and why can't it wait?!

Servant: O_O It's uh...O_O...just...O_O...just that..O_O...it seems Kurai...O_O... Kurai has...O_O...uh, um..O_O..has gone out of control and..O_O_O_O_O ...

Takui: *grabs Servant by the throat and holds him face-to-face with her* SPIT IT OUT ALREADY, HUMAN!!

Legato(from somewhere in Takui's room): Temper, temper! *chuckles*

Takui: Be quiet, Legato! *turns back to servant* Now, what's the problem?!

Servant: *gurgles unhappily* I-It's just t-that K-Kurai h-has gone m-mad and *gasp, choke, gurgle* a-and is attacking the m-mortal world, mad-dame! *gasp, choke* S-She is b-beyond c-cont-trol! *gasp* H-How should t-the matter be d-dealt with, madame-e? *gurgle, gasp*

Takui: *sighs and drops the servant..*

Servant: *THUD!* *gasp gasp gasp, choke, heave, gasp gasp, wheeze..*

Takui: Fine, fine. Tell Vincent to take Fei-Oh, Tkarr, and Cerberus to get her. Now, LEAVE! *spins on her heel and walks back into her room, slamming the door*

Door: *slams shut*

Servant: *runs back downstairs to give Vincent the message, then later in the servants' quarters..* Damn...I wish I were one o' those guys...

same little black cat from before: meow.

{ Meanwhile, back in Author-Land }

Andy: Jeez, Ender! You SUCK at poker!

Ender: I know, I know... -_-;

Kinneas: HI GUYS!!!

Zage: *seems to just "appear"* Hello Kinneas...

Ender: Hi Kinneas...-_-;

Andy: Hi!

Crazy: *also just kind of "here"* Anyone seen my muses?

Alex: I'm here! I dunno where everyone else is, though...

*sporks suddenly fly thru the air and completely miss everyone*

R.J.: Aww! I missed, dammit! SPORKS!!

Deirdre: COOKIE!

Chris: Ender, did you get her sporks?

Ender: She wouldn't shut up!!

LbH: Help! No! Not the....LEASH!! *comes running by*

Peluso: Hey! Get over here! If I feed you to Kurai, maybe she'll forget about me!

LbH: O_O; NOOOOOO! You'll never take me alive! *runs over and clings to Ender's head* Save me!!

Ender: No.

Andy: *snicker*

Kinneas: I'll save you! *whips out her Clarinet of Doom (tm)* Hold on, LbH!!

Everyone: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Clarinet of Doom (tm): TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!!!

Everyone except Kinneas: AGH!! *falls unconscious*

Kinneas: Oops! My bad!

little black cat: *falls out of nowhere and lands on K's head* Meow..*gets up and jumps off* Meow! *walks away*

Kinneas: ???

Zage(mysteriously unaffected): Bartender! Whiskey!

Bartender: Comin' right up!

?: I just LOVE my Cye plushie!

??: Well, I love my Duo plushie!

???: My Trowa plushie! It got DIRTY!!!

Zage: Who the hell?

Cid: *also just kind of there* Who the f*ck is that?

?: Hi! I'm Sara!

??: I'm Nicki!

???: I'm Nicole!!

????: I'm Allison, but these people call me Ally!

Ender: *wakes up* Huh?

?????: I'm Jessie! Nice to meet ya!

Sara: *hugs Cye plushie*

Nicki: *hugs Duo plushie*

Ally: *also hugging a Duo plushie*

Jessie: *hugs Heero plushie*

Nicole: *hugs Trowa plushie*

Ashleigh(appears cuz ?'s are annoying): *hugs Quatre plushie*

Erika(also just kind of appears): *hugs Li plushie*

Everyone else(now suddenly conscious): ô_o

Sara: Hey! You made a face! You're making fun of my Cye plushie, aren't you?! AREN'T YOU?!?!?!

Andy: Uh...no?

Sara: LIAR!!! *heaves a Cye plushie at Andy*

Andy: OW! Hey! That hurt!

Zage: What's with all the plushies?

LbH: Yeah! they look soooooooooo stupid!

Peluso: Yeah! Stupid! LOL! Stuuuuuuupid!!

All the muses: *in a sing-song voice..* plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid! plushies are stoopid!

Sara, Jessie, Erika, Ashleigh, Nicki, Nicole, & Ally: *glare* HOW DARE YOU INSULT THE HOLY HOLYNESS OF THE PLUSHIES!!!!

Kinneas: We didn't insult them! We just said they're stupid!! ^_^

Ender: Uh, Kinneas? I don't think that's a good idea...

Kinneas: What isn't? Calling them stupid? But they are!!

S,J,E,A,N,Ni,&Al: *Heero Yuy deathglare*

Ally: They have insulted the plushies!

Nicole: They must pay!

Everyone except the afore mentioned: O_O; SHIT!

Ender: Run away!!!

Nicki: The world will be saved by pancakes!!

Erika: And there will be much rejoicing!

Zage: Huh? *trips ender* Oops, sorry...*runs*

Sara: Bathe the whales!! *charges at the authors with Cye's yari*

Andy: Bathe the whales? o_O; AAHH! *runs*

Ally: Attack!! *starts hurling Duo plushies at the authors*

*Duo, Quatre, Trowa, Heero, Li, & Cye plushies pummel the authors as they attempt to run away...*

*In the background, the real Heero, Duo, Quatre, Trowa, Li, and Cye tiptoe past, hoping to be unnoticed....a little black cat sitting on a table smiles*

little black cat: Meow.

Zage: Cid! Help!

Cid: No f*cking way! *runs away*

Andy: *getting hit by mostly Cye plushies* Ow! Ow! Stop! We're sorry! Ow!

Peluso: Save me Andy! *clings to Andy's head*

LbH: *clinging to Ender* AHH! *gets knocked out by a Heero plushie*

Ender: *grabs LbH and runs* Why me?! Why always me?!

Zage: Cuz no one cares! *turns into her vampire scary self* GRR!

Ashleigh: AAHH! Vampire!!! Quatre, save me! *cowers behind a Quatre plushie*

Jessie: Cool!

Nicole: Awesome!

Erika: Neat!

*J, Ni, and E adopt Zage as their new god*

Zage: *smirks* Ok then...

Ally: Get the rest of them! ALL HAIL THE DUO PLUSHIE!!!!

Sara: Plotholes! Attack! *plotholes start to appear..*

Kinneas: Not the plotholes! NOOOO--hey, what's a plothole??

*a large plothole opens, and one million starving, crazed weasels covered in sauerkraut run out and charge at the authors...another drops a little black cat on Ender's head...yet another spews forth a wave of pumpkins, 15 angry movie critics, an Aztec warrior, the wreckage of a Gundam, a pod of dolphins, a horny lion, Red XIII, two dead fish, a can of spaghetti-O's and an umbrella....*

little black cat: Meow.

All authors and their muses: O_O; O_o; o_O; ô_o; WHAT THE F*CK!?!?

Ender: *flings cat off his head and keeps running in no set direction, as long as it's away from the plotholes and scary people..*

little black cat: *is flung*

Andy: This is getting toooooo weird! Ack! *hit by falling pumpkins*

Zage: *watches with a smirk on her face as she is being worshipped by Jessie, Erika, and Nicole* ...hm....Humans! attack Ender! This is fun...

J, N, and E: Yes master! *start hurling Heero, Trowa, and Li plushies at Ender..*

Ender: No fair! I'm ALWAYS the victim!!

Crazy: Hey, we're victims too, ya know! O_O; *gets chased by the lion*

*all the authors (save Zage) & their muses regroup, as they are being surrounded by flying plushies, plotholes, and the things spewing forth from the plotholes..*

LbH: What now?! We're surrounded!

Crazy: Thank you Mr. Obvious!!

Peluso: Help! *leaps onto Andy's face to avoid being caught by a weasle*

Ender: We're done for!!

Andy: Only a miracle could save us now!

*right on cue, a huge plothole opens under the authors and their muses, and they plummet through the inky depths of the plothole until they are finally spit out about 15 feet from the ground somewhere...*

Authors and their muses: AAAHHHHHHHHHH-- *THUD!*

Crazy: Owwwwww.....*rubs her head*

Andy: *sits up and picks pieces of pumpkin out of her hair* Yeesh! This is cruel and unusual punishment!!

Ender: *pulls weasel teeth out of his hand* Ow! No fair! Why always meeeeeee?!

Peluso: Shut up! You're giving me a headache!

LbH: Help! I bounced off a rock and got stuck to this sign!

Kinneas: *pulls LbH off the sign* Hey! There's writing on that sign!

Deirdre: Signs usually DO have words on them...

Kinneas: I knew that! But this one's words are weird! They're all spelled wrong!

Ender: Huh? What do you mean?

Kinneas: I mean, they're spelled wrong! Look!

All: *look at sign*

*Sign reads: WLECMOE OT TEH LNAD FO TEH TOPSY! ON TSRESPSASNGI!*

Andy: The heck?

Crazy: I think it's supposed to say "Welcome to the Land of the Typos. No Trespassing." Weird...

Ender: Land of the typos?

LbH: You'll fit right in, Ender!

Ender: Shut up!

Crazy: How can there be a "Land of the Typos"? What? Are there walking misspelled words here? This is just insane! It's a joke, I kno it!

Andy: *Gasp!* You typod! Ack! I made a typo two! ONN!

LbH: On? You meen "no", rite? O_O Ho on! We'er beng ataked by tyops!

Kinneas: Ataked!? By tyops?! Hwo si taht posibul?!

Ender: We hvae ot gte uot fo heer!! WNO!!

Peluso: I garee!

All: *nur dna urn adn run and run until the typos are out of reach..they come to another strange sign at a crossroads*

Andy: Now what?

Peluso: *points to sign* Andy, what's a lemming?

Andy: Huh? Why?

Peluso: The sign says "Lemming X-ing".

Ender: Lemmings are small rodents...

LbH: There's another sign! It says..*squints*.. "Beware the Chibi". Beware the Chibi? What's the chibi?

Kinneas: Isn't that "small" in Japanese? Or something to that effect?

Crazy: Yeah...hmm...I wonder..*walks closer to the sign..starts to shrink* ?! Help! *voice starts to get high pitched* Help! I'm...I'm....CHIBI!!!!

All: O_O; *before anyone can react, they all turn Chibi*

LbH: Oh no! We're chibi! *runs around in a circle*

Ender: *in tiny, chibi voice* I can't believe our horrible luck! This is horrible!

Andy: I know! And not to mention-- O_o; Do you hear that?

Crazy: Hear what?

Andy: I think I hear...squeaking!

All: *look down path...* o_O; OH NOO!! Not....LEMMINGS?!

*squeak, squeak* AAHH!! *squeak, squeak* *running footsteps* OH MY GOD, NOOOO--*THUMP* the authors have just been run down by lemmings

A/N: ^____^ So? How was it? Review! This was a spur-of-the-moment chapter. I was bored, hyper, and full of Orange Soda. This was the result. No, the authors are not dead. They just got run down by lemmings. Which, by the way, is actually the original idea of my friend Sara, who has a story here somewhere that ends with the very same thing! I'd like to thank all the authors for letting me use them, and my friends for letting me use them too. I don't own Gundam Wing, Trigun, Card Captor Sakura, Ronin Warriors, or FF7 in any way, shape, or form. I don't own the authors, or my friends, they own themselves. Review, peepz! See you in chapter 4!! ^_^