Double Trouble

Goten scowled and slunk even lower on the bench, glaring at the latest person to call him Gohan. Only the ignorant teacher hadn't really noticed the look because he went off to torture some other poor freshman. Goten shook his head and allowed his body to slide forward some more. If he wasn't so good at keeping his balance he was sure he would've slipped off by now. Keeping his tail tightly around his waist -- out of danger and out of sight -- he surveyed the courtyard with a cool, calculating eye. Until he ended up flat on his back, staring up at the bottom of the bench and a VERY familiar head of hair.

Not bothering to get up, Goten grinned up at his best friend. "Asshole," he muttered, tugging on Trunks' pant leg. He then found that they weren't his usual training clothes or ragged blue jeans.

Trunks yanked the material away from Goten's questioning fingers and leaned on the back of the bench to stare down at him. "I'm just SO insulted," he said back with a grin. "Or is that just the BEST you have today?"

Goten finally picked himself up, lightly dusting himself off before jerking his head in the direction of the other students. "Young ears," he said, despite the fact that he was younger than every person in the school. Even Trunks, who came in at half a year older.

Trunks laughed and shook his head, settling down on the bench where Goten had sat moments ago. "So what the hell's YOUR problem today?"

Goten scowled again and plopped down by the also taller boy. "The fact that I'm going to the same school as my ever-so-famous brother," he spat, trying to drill a hole in the ground with his glare. "I SWEAR if I get called Gohan ONE more time..."

Trunks chuckled. "Hey--"

"Do NOT even say it," Goten warned, eyeing the purple-haired boy. "Do NOT."

"I was about to say -- before I was so RUDELY interrupted -- 'Hey, I wonder if we have any classes together.' ALL RIGHT?" Trunks gave Goten a look that said "Idiot."

"Liar," Goten muttered, swinging at Trunks without really aiming. Then he noticed for the first time EXACTLY what his best friend had on.

Trunks was dressed in a light blue polo shirt with a windbreaker the same color as his hair pulled over, gray slacks with a belt that looked older than he was and scuffed black dress shoes that looked like he hadn't picked his feet off the ground the entire walk to school. His hair was gelled back to no avail; it kept slipping back into his face anyway. Goten laughed at his best friend -- the guy who didn't know the word "cufflink" -- dressed like he was the perfect little private school student.

Trunks knew EXACTLY what the cause of his best friend's amusement was. "Father made me dress like this," he muttered, Goten only howled louder. "Well, Mother was behind it!"

Goten still couldn't imagine Vegeta ordering Trunks to do anything short of getting out of his way while he was headed to the gravity room. Yet when he looked at his best friend he knew that not even Bulma could have gotten the boy into those clothes without strong backup.

"So, what'd she threaten him with this time?" Goten giggled, wiping tears from his eyes with one hand, the other holding his side. "Working with YOU for a day?"

Trunks wasn't the least bit offended even though he did swipe at Goten's ear. "Something like that. I think it was the fact that she threatened to cook something out of her books that scared him into it."

"You mean the ones she gave to my mom?" Goten asked as he started to giggle again.

"Yeah, those ones!" Trunks said as he remembered. Then he grinned. "I wonder what Father would do if he found out..." He shook his head and looked back at Goten. "Anyway, FIRST she threatened not to cook at all and Father just took a newspaper, sat back and looked at her like he was saying 'Good. Then maybe I'll get some decent food.' So Mother got pissed and told him that she loved those cookbooks and wanted him to go shopping with her for more. THEN he was going to help her cook!" Trunks started laughing at the memory of Vegeta ready to blow his wife to holy hell.

"Let me guess," Goten gasped, imagining the proud Saiyan prince dressed in a pink apron with white chef's hat and spatula. His grin widened and he doubled over in yet another laughing fit as Trunks continued to wonder what Goten was going to guess.

In between gasps for breath and laughing, Goten managed to convey most of the picture in his mind. Trunks conjured up the same picture of his father, only this time Vegeta was armed with a rolling pin. Trunks couldn't help but have the same reaction as Goten, and slapped him on the back. Goten went sprawling, though easily rolling to his feet and -- still wiping his eyes on his sleeve -- punched Trunks on the shoulder in retaliation.

The older half-breed jumped to his feet, fighting off his giggles with more success than his friend. Goten couldn't keep a straight face if his life depended on it. Goten still managed to get a few more hits in before Trunks pressed his advantage of semi-clearheadedness on the other boy.

It wasn't long before the other students had formed a circle around the friends and were chanting and cheering them on. Goten stopped with a confused look, and Trunks followed his example soon after. Then the obsidian-haired boy grinned with understanding.

"They think we're fighting," he told Trunks, glancing over at him.

"Duh, nimrod," Trunks answered, looking over the faces of the people in front. "But WHY?"

A furious-looking woman stepped out of the crowd and stumbled, thrown off-balance by the fighting she'd had to do to get to the two.

"What were you two thinking?" the woman demanded, straightening her glasses. Goten noticed that it didn't do any good because her nose was crooked and chuckled despite himself. The old lady glared at him over the rim of her bifocals. "Fighting. On the first day of school!"

Trunks elbowed Goten before he could say anything. "We weren't fighting, ma'am. We were just kidding around a little."

"Yeah," Goten added, having gotten over the blow to the ribs quickly. "If we were REALLY fighting you would know the difference."

The bun of thin mousy brown hair at the nape of the pale and frail-looking woman's neck bobbed as she looked down sharply at her clipboard. Goten sniggered as he took in the rest of her clothing, a light bluish-gray dress that tied in the back, with ruffles and what looked like a sewn-on apron on the front. It was something that BULMA'S great grandmother would have worn.

Trunks swallowed his chuckle at the look on the woman's face. He knew that look. It was the same one his mother wore almost every time she looked at his father. They were in deep shit.

"I have about 20 witnesses that saw you two fighting," she growled. "And YOU," she added, glaring at Goten, who had a particularly innocent look on his face, "just LOOK like a trouble-maker."

"Well, at least she doesn't think I look like Gohan," he muttered under his breath. Trunks snorted softly, trying to think whether or not he could turn his laugh into a hacking cough.

"I'll need your names," she continued, oblivious to their comments. She looked up from the clipboard expectantly.

"Son Goten," he answered blandly, grinning at Trunks at the expected answer.

"Well, then young man, you have a LOT of work to do living up to your brother's reputation," she scolded, glaring at him.

"I don't WANT to. I'm NOT my stupid PANSY brother!" Trunks grinned at Goten's self control. They all knew he wasn't born with a pause button between his brain and his mouth, but he was installing it himself. Which was probably why it was taking so long to get there.

She only glared at him again over the top of her granny glasses before turning to Trunks. "Your name?" she demanded.

"Do you want my WHOLE name?" he asked, crossing his fingers behind his back in hopes that she didn't.

"Of course. And I'm running out of patience," she warned, scowling at the pair.

"I'd worry more about my stock of breath mints if I were you," Goten muttered so only Trunks could hear. Unlike his best friend, Trunks could keep a straight face no matter how funny something was. Holding in his chuckles were a different matter.

He "coughed" again and looked up at the woman, who had her foot tapping in impatience. "Vegeta Trunks Vegeta Briefs," he said, scowling despite himself.

She paused after writing the name. She glared at him and snapped, "Stop fooling around! I want your name!"

"And I gave it to you," he said back, giving her a look of his own. "I was named after my father."

"Twice," Goten added. "And the bastard STILL isn't happy!'

Trunks chuckled and shook his head. The teacher shot Goten a venom-filled look. "How many of those words do you know?" she asked.

Goten leaned his elbow on Trunks' shoulder and gestured with his hand. "Depends on what language," he answered casually. "Some of them have more than others. Besides, Bulma calls him a bastard all the time!"

"She's MARRIED to him!" Trunks protested. Then he cocked his head in thought. "Then again, he IS."

"You're Bulma Briefs' son?" the annoying woman asked as she looked at his name again.

Trunks rolled his eyes in a "duh" motion. "Yeah."

"Then I'll have to tell her that she should have disciplined her son more if THIS is how he acts!" She turned on Goten. "And YOU should have more respect for her!"

"Huh? I have plenty of respect for Bulma! She's been a friend of the family since Dad was 7!" He brushed his hair out of his eyes and shook his head. "Can we GO now? I don't know where anything is because YOU kept me out here so long!"

"You'll stay until I dismiss you," she snapped again, lowering her eyes to the infamous clipboard.

Goten sighed and leaned against his stone post of a best friend. "Something tells me this is going to be a LONG day."

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After 20 minutes of searching, arguing and convincing the local bully to leave him alone, Goten finally made it to his first class. He plopped down in the nearest available seat and put a glare on his face that would do Vegeta proud. In the same amount of time it took to find his locker, follow some of his fellow students to homeroom, and get the stupid moron that tried to take it off his back, he also managed to get called "Gohan" 5 times, get another report written for fighting, and 2 more lectures about his brother.

The only person immune to the look on his face shoved him almost out of his chair and slumped down next to him, an equally murderous look on his face.

"Trunks! I didn't know we had the same class!" Goten cheered a little as he eyed his best friend. "All right, what happened in homeroom?"

Trunk's scowl deepened, and Goten immediately thought that he looked EXACTLY like Vegeta, "Well, *3* times during the goddamn *5* minutes were were in there, the STUPID teacher asked who was playing with the book! She didn't believe it was my real name, and I got written up for giving the teacher lip!" A small, wry smile crossed his face. "Now, if only they could hear how I talk to my parents they'd realize they're getting off light!"

Goten chuckled. "Yeah, well guess who *I* have for homeroom?" He grinned, although it was much without humor. "I have our old friend the hag." Trunks shook his head as he put it in his hands. "Wanna guess what her name is?" Goten asked, an all-too familiar mischievous grin slipping onto his lips.

Trunks glanced at Goku's look-alike out of the corner of his eye. Goten seemed to be taking an unholy amount of glee in putting down this woman. "I'm afraid to ask," he admitted, "but what?"

"Mrs. Pigme!" Goten howled, no longer able to keep his laughter in check. Trunks remembered the old snotty woman and joined in.

Goten was the first to cut off as a tall blond walked in, arms already loaded down with books. He grinned at her from under his lashes, elbowing Trunks as she passed. The lavender-haired boy also followed her with his eyes as she set her books on the teachers desk.

Trunks laughed outright as Goten's -- along with most of the other guys in the class -- jaw dropped to the floor as she turned to face them, 3x5 cards in her hands. The class groaned as she started to pass them back.

"Now. I want everyone to fill these out before I give you all assigned seats," she said sweetly. Trunks and Goten glanced at each other. S and V were pretty far apart when it came to seatings.

"Man, I HATE these things," a guy behind them growled as he received his white index card. "We have to do these every DAMN class!"

"What are they for?" Goten asked as he flipped his over and noticed the writing on the back.

The guy stared at them incredulously. "You mean you NEVER filled one of these out? Where the hell have you BEEN?"

"Homeschooled," the boys answered in unison. Trunks looked on the cards and noticed the questions. Name, address, phone number, nickname... Trunks sighed as he reached for a pencil. Today was going to be so boring if this was all they had to do. Then he looked at Goten and grinned. No way. With the youngest Son boy in class the last thing it would be was boring.

As if on cue, Goten raised his hand. "Excuse me, Miss Pretty-lady ma'am, but what's your name?"

She smiled as her hand crept toward a piece of chalk. "You'll find out in a minute."

"Cool name. Is it German?" He got a few giggles from the class, and a smile from the woman.

"Close," she said as she filled in the same questions on the blackboard. "It's--"

"Really long," Goten interrupted, staring at the twenty letter last name. "By Dende..."

She shook her head. "That's why I put my nickname down as Mrs. Q. I think it's a little easier than trying to pronounce that all the time. Have you all finished?"

Goten scribbled the rest of his information down and grinned at the teacher. His eyes following her all the way around the room, he muttered to Trunks, "Well, this class definitely WON'T be boring!"

Trunks smirked. "Bet me. Even if all you do is sit and drool all over her, you'll still be bored. That's just how you are. Now ME on the other hand..." Goten shot him a look and the other boy only shrugged.

"I think everyone will be happy to know you are NOT going to be put in alphabetical order." Everyone's opinion of her rose a little at that. "You'll be changing seats almost everyday until I find someone you can sit by and work with if need be. Stay where you are for today."

"Wonder if she'll let us stay together," Goten muttered without taking his eyes from the blond woman.

"If you can manage to keep quiet for more than 5 minutes," Trunks answered, glancing at his best friend. "So what do you think?"

The dark-haired boy snorted. "Then I think we're screwed!'

"Bingo."

"I have a list of things you'll need for this class," she said, holding up a stack of paper, tapping it on the desk. "I expect you to have them by the end of the week. If not, you can buy them from me."

"Guess Mom won't be seeing this," Goten muttered as he was handed the paper, looking it over. Then his eyes went wide.

"What about Gohan? O, never mind. He's too worried about Videl and the baby. When is it due anyway?" he wondered aloud as he skimmed over the materials, then glued his eyes to them.

"Trunks, what class IS this?" Goten asked as he carefully reread some of the list.

The older boy sighed and laid his head on his arms. "Home ec," he muttered. 'O, Dende this is going to be a REALLY long day.'

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"How the HELL did we get in there?!" Goten roared as he followed Trunks down the hallway. "I KNEW I should've went with Mom when she chose my classes, but I thought I was just being a little paranoid! But COOKING? That is NOT my family's strong point!'

Trunks chuckled. "I don't know. Father is better than Mother, but he's too lazy to fix his own food."

"Yeah, but MY father didn't grow up planet jumping as a 10-year-old! He grew up kicking ass at the tournaments so he was able to buy enough shit to go dragonball hunting!"

"Son Goten," a voice rang out.

"What now?" he complained, turning. But there was no one there. He scratched his head, not feeling any ki either. "Huh."

"Son Goten, please report to the main office," the same voice said.

Trunks hit him on the head and rolled his eyes. "It's the PA system, moron."

"I knew that," Goten protested. "I'm wondering where the main office IS."

"Vegeta Vegeta... what? Vegeta Vegeta Briefs, please report to the main office!"

Trunks growled as he grabbed Goten's arm. "If that wasn't so annoying it'd be funny."

"Ow! Not so hard, moron. That hurts!" Goten complained as he broke the hard grip Trunks had near his shoulder. "Let go!"

"Pain is irrelevant," Trunks said automatically, then blinked, hitting himself on the head.

Goten giggled. "Been hanging around Vegeta too long, I see," he teased, ignoring the glare. "But if that's true, then you're the biggest irrelevance in my ass I've ever met." Trunks threw him against the row of lockers, denting the three he landed against. "Hey! Now we're gonna get in MORE trouble, and I don't feel like getting wished back after Mom kills me. Dying is a bitch."

A nearby janitor gave the boys a strange look, then blinked and shook his head, muttering something about laying off the whiskey.

"Damn, where IS the stupid OFFICE?" Trunks demanded of the trophy case. Goten grabbed the collar of the polo shirt and dragged his khaki-clad friend around the corner, dumping him in front of a door marked "Office."

"How..." Trunks began, then followed Goten's finger. On the wall, just above head level, was a sign on the corner they'd just rounded. Pointing in their direction it read "Main Office." The other was indicating the way to the E wing, classes 100-125.

"Hooked on Phonics worked for me!" Goten said with a grin, shoving Trunks through the door. "Apparently it didn't for you." Trunks growled and punched Goten. Rubbing his arm, the younger boy grinned. He was content with this small victory for now, but later he would have bigger fish to fry.

Once inside, the sharp-nosed secretary glared at them and pointed to the chairs. "Sit."

Goten blinked at the authority in her voice but grinned and managed a sloppy salute before obeying. Trunks just shrugged and took a seat next to Goten.

"I wonder which one we're being called in for," he muttered under his breath. "Or maybe they should do it 2 at a time."

Goten nodded. "But Mom's gonna be happy I waited until AFTER the first class to get called to the office."

The secretary was eyeing them warily, and Trunks noticed Goten's eyes light up with another crazy idea. Groaning inwardly, he leaned over and asked, "What are you planning to do now?"

"I see the PA system controls," Goten said with a smile sneaking onto his face. "And I ASSUME you know how to operate them, right?"

"Please. They're so SIMPLE it's pathetic."

"Well, as long as we're in here..." Black eyes slid to meet the blue gaze and he was now grinning. "Why not make an announcement?"

Trunks raised an eyebrow, getting the idea. "What do we do about Ms. Sir?" he asked, glancing at the secretary, who had obviously been in the military at one time.

"Don't tell me you can't operate that thing with only one hand," Goten said mock-incredulously.

"All right. When though? I mean, she's been keeping an eye on us the whole time."

"We're going to ave detention for like the next WEEK anyway. What's a few more days?" Goten asked as he stood and stretched.

"True," he admitted. "Mom always said if you're gonna make a a mistake, make it big." Putting a hand on Goten's shoulder, he wandered up to the desk and smiled sweetly at the secretary.

Looking up at him, she snapped, "Is there something I can do for you?"

"Actually, ma'am, there is. Could you please stand up for me?" Trunks asked in the nicest voice he could manage, turning on the charm. Goten rolled his eyes, but didn't comment as the woman stood. "Thank you." In a lightning-fast move he grabbed her, spun her around so her back was pressed against him and clapped a hand over her mouth. With his free arm, he motioned for Goten to go before him.

As he passed the secretary, he muttered to her, "Look, lady. He put the moves on you. Bad boy, isn't he?"

"Cornball," Trunks muttered as he flipped a switch. "And this is just SO high-tech Goten. I don't think I can handle it." He snorted as he looked down at the buttons. The switch turned it on. The button that was marked "school" instead of a room number was pushed.

Goten patted the microphone. "Is this thing on?"

"YES," Trunks hissed, loosening his grip on the blue-faced lady. "Sorry."

"All right. I'm sorry for interrupting class, but there's a few things we need to get straight, and this is the only way I can think of. Um, let's see. I'm Son GOTEN, and if ANYBODY calls me Gohan one more time I will not be held responsible for accidents that happen afterward. And if any of you has a Vegeta Vegeta Briefs in any of your classes, that IS his real name, but call him by his middle name, Trunks. Or shit will happen. That is all."

"You bet that's all, mister," said a gravelly voice from behind. Goten groaned inwardly and turned to find who he assumed to be the principal holding Trunks by the ear and his secretary babbling by their side.

"So, how'd I do?" he asked Trunks, ignoring the older man.

"Perfect." Then he mouthed, "And if this bastard doesn't let go I'm going to hit him."

"Not too hard," Goten mouthed back, then smiled angelically at the principal. "You wanted to see us, sir?"

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Goten shook his head as he walked out of the office. "Sheesh! A little something like that happens and they tried to suspend me!' He grinned as Trunks caught up with him, wearing a smirk. "So, how'd it go?"

Trunks' blue eyes were practically glowing. "When Father heard them call me 'Vegeta,' I thought he was going to kill EVERYONE." He snickered and looked back. "I think they'll hesitate before calling him in again. And they don't know Mother's even worse!"

Goten smiled innocently at the teacher. Having heard the announcement, and knowing how Gohan had been in class, the man was VERY careful not to insult or offend the youngest Son boy in any way. And that went for Trunks too, since everyone associated him with the raving maniac who could fling cars over two dozen meters.

The older boy sighed and put his hands behind his head. "I could get used to this. Why didn't we think of that earlier?"

Goten grinned and doodled on the table. The teacher was red-faced, but too scared to tell him to stop. "Because we didn't know if our mothers or fathers were going to show up. I think that one guy is scared of Mom."

"Why shouldn't he be? Didn't she try to kill him once?" Trunks asked calmly, turning a few heads.

"I think everyone in the office has had that experience, if they were here when Gohan was. And if they weren't, then they know now NOT to call her in when I'm in trouble." He grinned and rocked the seat back onto 2 legs. "If she ever shuts up you can't hear what you say anyway because by then you're deaf, and the world'll end in like...5 minutes."

"Yeah, well at least we got out of there before lunch," Trunks muttered. "Otherwise they NEVER woulda let us eat on the front lawn."

"Yes the would. Vegeta was gonna show them the capsules. And then what was inside," he added. "I'm just glad Goku showed up when he did. I mean, I hate that principal with a passion, but I don't want him dead because Father thought he was another Saiyan trying to take over the empire."

"Prince Apelle?" Goten laughed. "Where the HELL did he get THAT from? And WHAT empire?"

"I don't KNOW!" Trunks howled as he laughed. When the bell rang, the teacher practically shoved the boys into the hall. Wiping his eyes, Trunks asked with a straight face, "Do you think he likes us?"

Goten looked over his shoulder. "You know, Mom always told Bulma when they were younger that when guys were mean to you, it meant they liked you." He winked at Trunks. "So I think so."

Trunks made a face. "All right, but I think I would prefer it if he DIDN'T." He glanced at his schedule, which had somehow survived the entire day. But it was only 5 out of 8 periods. There was still time. "What's your next class?"

"AP Chemistry. You?"

"Whatever it is, I can't pronounce it," he answered. "I think it's that thing that Mother was talking about when she was trying to modify the time machine."

"Good luck, pal," Goten said cheerfully as he patted his friend's back. "See ya next period. Advanced Trig, right?" Trunks nodded and Goten gave a thumbs-up. "See ya!"

When Trunks walked into the room, he almost passed out. Sitting on the teacher's desk, arms folded and glaring the students into submission, was Bulma. Hair pulled back into a low ponytail, it was easier to see that her black jacket sported the Capsule Corp. logo, and underneath was a red tank top that had ever guy in the class looking at her. Black jeans were held snugly to her hips by a worn leather belt and she just looked like any normal, fresh-out-of-college club crawler. Only she was here teaching her son's shop class.

Trunks groaned and shook his head as he slid into his seat. "By Kami, this is going to be a LONG day. A REALLY LONG day."

"All right, take your seats," Bulma said pleasantly, smiling angelically at the class.

'O, man. This sucks SO much,' Trunks thought as he sunk lower into his seat. 'PLEASE don't let her say anything embarrassing. Kami, what am I THINKING? Of COURSE she's gonna say something embarrassing! She can't keep her mouth SHUT!' He sat up. 'Wait just a goddamn minute! How the HELL did she get a teaching job in here?'

Bulma grinned and waved index cards. There was a simultaneous groaning, and her grin widened. "I heard that I'm supposed to give THESE to you." Then she ripped them up and tossed them over her shoulder. "However, I know *I* hate READING the damn things as much as YOU hate WRITING them. So, if I ask you a question, answer me. And I'll show you all kinds of shit to record it and test for lies. So, when you say your dog ate your homework, I'll know if it actually DID."

Bulma turned around and the guy next to Trunks let out a low whistle. "Damn."

Trunks growled and put his head on his folded arms. "This is so NOT good."

Bulma turned around with the infamous attendance book. Grinning, she nodded at it. "Let's get a few of my rules straight. You cut my class, I'll personally kick your ass. You can only chew gum if you're planning to use it instead of glue, and if I hear ANY comment about my looks. not only will *I* put you in the hospital, my husband will PERSONALLY hunt you down and kill you." With a cheerleader-like shrug, she grinned and started to call out the names of 25 white-faced boys.

As the class went on, Trunks found that the only time his mother even LOOKED at him was when she called his name for attendance. Feeling a little better, he sat up and even wondered why she wasn't being a total, overly loud, annoying bitch.

'She's treating it like a business meeting,' he realized. 'And she HATES talking to people she knows there.' Grinning, he sat back and twiddled his thumbs as the others struggled with equations he'd known perfectly since babyhood.

Bulma shook her head as the kids repeatedly failed. "Didn't ANY of you read the course requirements?" she demanded, hands on hips. "Obviously NOT!" She heaved a sigh and turned to the board. "You ALL have to know algebra and geometry to pass this class. Not to mention that you can't be a perfectionist. You'll drive yourself insane. This is trial and error." At this, she looked at Trunks and motioned him to the board. Wondering what she was up to, he obeyed. Placing her hands on his shoulder, she grinned. "Like this. *I* wanted a girl. Trial and error."

Trunks grinned as the class laughed. "Yeah, and this is ALSO trial and error. I have VERY good hearing, and if *I* hear any of you talking about my mother, you most likely won't have to worry about EITHER of my parents because I'll get to you first. And IF I don't kill you, THEN my father will. Except I've been around my mother too long to MAKE mistakes." With that, he bowed and sat down, shooting a glare at the boy next to him, who was trying to find out how to turn invisible.

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Trunks met up with Goten after class, and it wasn't hard to see that the young Saiyan was royally pissed. "So, how was your day?" he asked, amused.

Goten shot him a glare. "That goddamn fucking woman is EVERYWHERE! She's my chem teacher!" he ranted, threatening to turn Super Saiyan. "And I'm ALREADY banned from experiments the whole damned YEAR! Chem is no fun without playing with chemicals! I mean her eyebrows will grow back!"

Trunks glanced at him. "Sounds eventful. Guess who my shop teacher is?"

Goten glared at him. "If you tell me the principal, I'm NOT taking pity on you."

Trunks shook his head. "Nope. My mother."

Goten just looked at him stupidly for a minute, then started to laugh. "O, Kami, that's good!"

Trunks didn't look amused. "It isn't bad, but then again, it's really PATHETIC!" When Goten wouldn't stop laughing, Trunks merely dragged him through the halls. Life with Goten was NEVER boring.

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Especially when it came to lunch. Trunks grinned as the dark-haired boy scouted out a place to throw his capsules.

"Dammit! They're EVERYWHERE!" Goten growled over the noise of half the school being packed into the room. "Where the HELL am I supposed to eat?"

Trunks shrugged and shoved three tables back against the wall, careful not to either break them or the bones of anyone behind them. "I don't know. This is my spot."

He grinned innocently as Goten swore under his breath, then his eyes lit up. "Jackpot!" Trunks groaned as his best friend opened the door and tossed the blue capsule on the first step. Instantly, a long table popped up under a red-and-white-striped tent, covering the food. "Buffet," he cackled, wandering into the tent to get his lunch.

The lavender-haired boy only watched, shaking his head in amusement as the teacher on duty alternately rubbed his eyes and blinked before grabbing the arm of a passing teacher and hauling the stumbling woman over to the pair.

With an inward moan, Trunks plopped down in his seat as he watched the already infamous Mrs. Pigme march over to the foot of his table, the glare on her face almost worthy of Vegeta.

"WHAT do you think you're doing?" she demanded, her clipboard appearing out of nowhere. Even Trunks couldn't see where it had come from.

Holding a chicken leg to his mouth, he looked down at it before returning his gaze to the irate woman. "Eating," he answered in the "isn't it obvious" tone he used with Goten more often than not.

As expected, that wasn't the answer she was looking for, and green eyes narrowed. "Really? ALL of that? How many lunches did you steal?"

Closing his eyes, Trunks bit his tongue to keep from laughing when he heard the astonished cry of the other man. "None, MA'AM," he answered. Keeping his voice blank took conscious effort.

"Hey! What the hell are you doing with that?" Goten shouted, chasing his stolen food back into the cafeteria. "Dammit, I want my lunch back!"

When the man showed no signs of slowing down, Goten shook his head and lunged at the waving hand. The guy stopped short as he felt the breeze and looked down to see his clenched fist empty. Glancing at the kid, he noticed the presence of the bag full of ham and cheese sandwiches slung nonchalantly over the boy's shoulder.

Trunks sighed and stood up, digging the red capsule out of his pocket. "Let's put it away, Goten," he said, pressing the button on the table before scooping up whatever didn't fit back in the original.

"But I'm HUNGRY!" Goten protested, growling as he went back to his tent. Everything except the ham and cheese went back where it came from, and, with an exasperated sigh, placed the blue cylinder into his friend's outstretched hand.

With an irritated growl, Goten fell back into the chair next to Trunks, almost not noticing the splintering sound. Trunks rolled his eyes but looked at Mrs. Pigme, who was practically purple from holding her temper.

"Both of you, to the office. NOW!" she ordered, pencil flying over the clipboard.

"Think they'll remember us?" Goten wondered out loud as they simultaneously stood.

"Not a chance," Trunks replied with a small smirk.

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The secretary almost dropped dead when she saw the two innocently-smiling boys. "You... you..."

Goten nodded at her in a gentleman-like manner. "Nice to see you too," he replied to her stuttering and took a seat, putting his hands behind his head before crossing his ankles and generally making himself comfortable. Jerking his head in the direction of the chair next to him, Goten grinned. "Nice to be home, ain't it Trunks?"

Vegeta's son smiled back and slid into the seat, propping his feet on Goten's knees and laying back across the rest of the row. "Yup." He closed his eyes and folded his hands behind his head. "Wonder how many hours he's gonna try for this time."

The door to the office swung open and the principal stepped out, rubbing his temples. He suddenly stopped to look at the grinning Goten, who was waving cheerfully at him.

"Hello again, sir," the Son boy said.

Without a word, he turned and slammed the door behind him, but the Saiyans' keen ears could hear him rattling a bottle of pills. Trunks sat up, watching until he opened the door again. One hand rubbing at his head, he beckoned for the boys to come in. With a heartfelt sigh, he slowly closed the door, wondering what they'd done now.

"So, what are you sent here for?" he asked, closing his eyes as he sat down in front of them.

"Well, sir, we were just trying to have lunch and--" Goten was cut off as the door unexpectedly burst open. Bulma smiled sweetly and smoothed her hair before joining the three men.

"Sir, I just wanted to talk to you about--" The principal shook his head and put a hand over her mouth. Trunks smiled: the man obviously got to know his mother before he hired her. It was the only way to get her to shut up so he could get a word in.

"I don't know WHAT is going on with these boys, but I want them to talk before I hear anything else." Removing his palm, he nodded to Goten. "Go ahead."

Goten smiled at Bulma and began to speak. "Well, this lady really has it in for us, but you see, we were just trying to have lunch. It IS lunchtime and I'm missing it, but anyway, we had our tables out and--"

"Wait a minute. YOUR tables?" he asked, looking back and forth between them.

"Yes, sir," Trunks replied. "My mother made them," he said, motioning to Bulma, who stood cross-armed next to the principal.

The older man gave the teacher a strange look. Bulma sighed and shook her head. "Do you remember Son Gohan's eating habits?" she asked.

Aged black eyes went wide and the tanned face paled. "Yes," he said reluctantly, as if afraid to know what came next.

"Well, BOTH of them eat like that," she said, looking at her son and his best friend. "So, instead of them cleaning out the cafeteria everyday and ME having to pay for it all, I made them something to keep their OWN food in." She held out her hand and Trunks tossed her one of the unused capsules.

She set the invention down on the table and smiled as the man picked up it up. Turning it over, he shook his head and let it drop back onto the hard surface of the table. "THIS is what the fuss was all about?"

"Actually, it's what's INSIDE the capsule is what the fuss is all about," Trunks informed the man. Pushing the table back as far as it would go, he tossed the orange cylinder in his hand before tapping the button on top and letting it drop a few feet away. A blue-and-white-striped overhang attached itself to the wall and three buffet tables dropped down from underneath it, all in a fraction of a second.

Trunks grabbed the back of Goten's shirt as the other boy's mouth began to water. The principal's eyes were wide as he stood to look at the Saiyan meal spread before him.

Shifting his grip on his friend to the other hand, Trunks smiled at the man. "Actually, that one goes outside."

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Goten stretched as he waltzed out of the office, grinning. Trunks strolled along behind him, nodding even though the boy was -- surprisingly -- no longer talking. "Well, that wasn't so bad," Goten said, looking at his best friend, who was obviously ignoring him.

A devious smile crossed his face as Trunks nodded. "Is Vegeta a pansy?" he asked, which included a nod from the other boy. Biting back a laugh, he continued. "Are you in love with Bulma? What about me?" Both answers were affirmative and Goten giggled despite himself.

Trunks was slowly coming back as he realized that Goten wasn't just talking. He was laughing. Heart sinking, Trunks listened for the next thing he said.

"Hey Trunks. Have you ever thought about stealing Videl from Gohan?" So in the habit of agreeing, he nodded without thinking before smacking himself on the head. Goten swallowed a harsh laugh and blinked at Trunks innocently. "I'm gonna have to tell him that," he said seriously.

Not even wanting to think about the kinds of questions he must've asked before, Trunks decided to settle on pounding the boy now for that one. Unfortunately, he didn't get the chance as Mrs. Pigme came racing up behind them.

"Great Dende, what did we do now?" Goten groaned as he turned to face the elderly woman.

"How the hell could we do ANYTHING? We've been out for 30 seconds! Even for us..."

The grizzled old woman panted, glaring at them still. "Your mother just called," she finally said, standing straighter. "Something about Videl..."

"The BABY!" Goten cried, grinning. "Hey Trunks, I'm gonna be an uncle!"

"Great Dende, help us all," Trunks muttered as he let Goten drag him along.

Bulma was waiting in the office, car capsule in hand and grinning over her shoulder. "You boys ready?"

"Hell yeah!" Goten shouted as he stopped behind her. Trunks took the capsule before Goten could somehow do something to it and clicked the top. Tossing it a short distance away, he grinned and made an "after you" movement.

"Come on, cornball," Goten said, grabbing Trunks' polo shirt and yanking him in his wake. Trunks shook off the insistent hand and dashed for the door.

"So, how was your day?" Bulma asked as she put the car into flying mode, then set the coordinates for the hospital.

"Pretty good," they admitted. "Except for that DAMN woman who was EVERYWHERE." Then Goten grinned at Trunks and added, "But still. It IS only the first day of school!"