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"How the HELL did we get in there?!" Goten roared as he followed
Trunks down the hallway. "I KNEW I should've went with Mom when she
chose my classes, but I thought I was just being a little paranoid! But
COOKING? That is NOT my family's strong point!'
Trunks chuckled. "I don't know. Father is better than Mother, but he's
too lazy to fix his own food."
"Yeah, but MY father didn't grow up planet jumping as a 10-year-old! He
grew up kicking ass at the tournaments so he was able to buy enough shit to
go dragonball hunting!"
"Son Goten," a voice rang out.
"What now?" he complained, turning. But there was no one there. He
scratched his head, not feeling any ki either. "Huh."
"Son Goten, please report to the main office," the same voice said.
Trunks hit him on the head and rolled his eyes. "It's the PA system,
moron."
"I knew that," Goten protested. "I'm wondering where the main
office IS."
"Vegeta Vegeta... what? Vegeta Vegeta Briefs, please report to the main
office!"
Trunks growled as he grabbed Goten's arm. "If that wasn't so annoying
it'd be funny."
"Ow! Not so hard, moron. That hurts!" Goten complained as he broke
the hard grip Trunks had near his shoulder. "Let go!"
"Pain is irrelevant," Trunks said automatically, then blinked,
hitting himself on the head.
Goten giggled. "Been hanging around Vegeta too long, I see," he
teased, ignoring the glare. "But if that's true, then you're the biggest
irrelevance in my ass I've ever met." Trunks threw him against the row
of lockers, denting the three he landed against. "Hey! Now we're gonna
get in MORE trouble, and I don't feel like getting wished back after Mom
kills me. Dying is a bitch."
A nearby janitor gave the boys a strange look, then blinked and shook his
head, muttering something about laying off the whiskey.
"Damn, where IS the stupid OFFICE?" Trunks demanded of the trophy
case. Goten grabbed the collar of the polo shirt and dragged his khaki-clad
friend around the corner, dumping him in front of a door marked
"Office."
"How..." Trunks began, then followed Goten's finger. On the wall,
just above head level, was a sign on the corner they'd just rounded. Pointing
in their direction it read "Main Office." The other was indicating
the way to the E wing, classes 100-125.
"Hooked on Phonics worked for me!" Goten said with a grin, shoving
Trunks through the door. "Apparently it didn't for you." Trunks
growled and punched Goten. Rubbing his arm, the younger boy grinned. He was
content with this small victory for now, but later he would have bigger fish
to fry.
Once inside, the sharp-nosed secretary glared at them and pointed to the
chairs. "Sit."
Goten blinked at the authority in her voice but grinned and managed a sloppy
salute before obeying. Trunks just shrugged and took a seat next to Goten.
"I wonder which one we're being called in for," he muttered under
his breath. "Or maybe they should do it 2 at a time."
Goten nodded. "But Mom's gonna be happy I waited until AFTER the first
class to get called to the office."
The secretary was eyeing them warily, and Trunks noticed Goten's eyes light
up with another crazy idea. Groaning inwardly, he leaned over and asked,
"What are you planning to do now?"
"I see the PA system controls," Goten said with a smile sneaking
onto his face. "And I ASSUME you know how to operate them, right?"
"Please. They're so SIMPLE it's pathetic."
"Well, as long as we're in here..." Black eyes slid to meet the
blue gaze and he was now grinning. "Why not make an announcement?"
Trunks raised an eyebrow, getting the idea. "What do we do about Ms.
Sir?" he asked, glancing at the secretary, who had obviously been in the
military at one time.
"Don't tell me you can't operate that thing with only one hand,"
Goten said mock-incredulously.
"All right. When though? I mean, she's been keeping an eye on us the
whole time."
"We're going to ave detention for like the next WEEK anyway. What's a
few more days?" Goten asked as he stood and stretched.
"True," he admitted. "Mom always said if you're gonna make a a
mistake, make it big." Putting a hand on Goten's shoulder, he wandered
up to the desk and smiled sweetly at the secretary.
Looking up at him, she snapped, "Is there something I can do for
you?"
"Actually, ma'am, there is. Could you please stand up for me?"
Trunks asked in the nicest voice he could manage, turning on the charm. Goten
rolled his eyes, but didn't comment as the woman stood. "Thank
you." In a lightning-fast move he grabbed her, spun her around so her
back was pressed against him and clapped a hand over her mouth. With his free
arm, he motioned for Goten to go before him.
As he passed the secretary, he muttered to her, "Look, lady. He put the
moves on you. Bad boy, isn't he?"
"Cornball," Trunks muttered as he flipped a switch. "And this
is just SO high-tech Goten. I don't think I can handle it." He snorted
as he looked down at the buttons. The switch turned it on. The button that
was marked "school" instead of a room number was pushed.
Goten patted the microphone. "Is this thing on?"
"YES," Trunks hissed, loosening his grip on the blue-faced lady.
"Sorry."
"All right. I'm sorry for interrupting class, but there's a few things
we need to get straight, and this is the only way I can think of. Um, let's
see. I'm Son GOTEN, and if ANYBODY calls me Gohan one more time I will not be
held responsible for accidents that happen afterward. And if any of you has a
Vegeta Vegeta Briefs in any of your classes, that IS his real name, but call
him by his middle name, Trunks. Or shit will happen. That is all."
"You bet that's all, mister," said a gravelly voice from behind.
Goten groaned inwardly and turned to find who he assumed to be the principal
holding Trunks by the ear and his secretary babbling by their side.
"So, how'd I do?" he asked Trunks, ignoring the older man.
"Perfect." Then he mouthed, "And if this bastard doesn't let
go I'm going to hit him."
"Not too hard," Goten mouthed back, then smiled angelically at the
principal. "You wanted to see us, sir?"
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Goten shook his head as he walked out of the office. "Sheesh! A little
something like that happens and they tried to suspend me!' He grinned as
Trunks caught up with him, wearing a smirk. "So, how'd it go?"
Trunks' blue eyes were practically glowing. "When Father heard them call
me 'Vegeta,' I thought he was going to kill EVERYONE." He snickered and
looked back. "I think they'll hesitate before calling him in again. And
they don't know Mother's even worse!"
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Goten
smiled innocently at the teacher. Having heard the announcement, and
knowing how Gohan had been in class, the man was VERY careful not to insult
or offend the youngest Son boy in any way. And that went for Trunks too,
since everyone associated him with the raving maniac who could fling cars
over two dozen meters.
The older boy sighed and put his hands behind his head. "I could get
used to this. Why didn't we think of that earlier?"
Goten grinned and doodled on the table. The teacher was red-faced, but too
scared to tell him to stop. "Because we didn't know if our mothers or
fathers were going to show up. I think that one guy is scared of Mom."
"Why shouldn't he be? Didn't she try to kill him once?" Trunks
asked calmly, turning a few heads.
"I think everyone in the office has had that experience, if they were
here when Gohan was. And if they weren't, then they know now NOT to call
her in when I'm in trouble." He grinned and rocked the seat back onto
2 legs. "If she ever shuts up you can't hear what you say anyway
because by then you're deaf, and the world'll end in like...5
minutes."
"Yeah, well at least we got out of there before lunch," Trunks
muttered. "Otherwise they NEVER woulda let us eat on the front
lawn."
"Yes the would. Vegeta was gonna show them the capsules. And then what
was inside," he added. "I'm just glad Goku showed up when he did.
I mean, I hate that principal with a passion, but I don't want him dead because
Father thought he was another Saiyan trying to take over the empire."
"Prince Apelle?" Goten laughed. "Where the HELL did he get
THAT from? And WHAT empire?"
"I don't KNOW!" Trunks howled as he laughed. When the bell rang,
the teacher practically shoved the boys into the hall. Wiping his eyes,
Trunks asked with a straight face, "Do you think he likes us?"
Goten looked over his shoulder. "You know, Mom always told Bulma when
they were younger that when guys were mean to you, it meant they liked you."
He winked at Trunks. "So I think so."
Trunks made a face. "All right, but I think I would prefer it if he
DIDN'T." He glanced at his schedule, which had somehow survived the
entire day. But it was only 5 out of 8 periods. There was still time.
"What's your next class?"
"AP Chemistry. You?"
"Whatever it is, I can't pronounce it," he answered. "I
think it's that thing that Mother was talking about when she was trying to
modify the time machine."
"Good luck, pal," Goten said cheerfully as he patted his friend's
back. "See ya next period. Advanced Trig, right?" Trunks nodded
and Goten gave a thumbs-up. "See ya!"
When Trunks walked into the room, he almost passed out. Sitting on the
teacher's desk, arms folded and glaring the students into submission, was Bulma.
Hair pulled back into a low ponytail, it was easier to see that her black
jacket sported the Capsule Corp. logo, and underneath was a red tank top
that had ever guy in the class looking at her. Black jeans were held snugly
to her hips by a worn leather belt and she just looked like any normal,
fresh-out-of-college club crawler. Only she was here teaching her son's
shop class.
Trunks groaned and shook his head as he slid into his seat. "By Kami,
this is going to be a LONG day. A REALLY LONG day."
"All right, take your seats," Bulma said pleasantly, smiling
angelically at the class.
'O, man. This sucks SO much,' Trunks thought as he sunk lower into his
seat. 'PLEASE don't let her say anything embarrassing. Kami, what am I
THINKING? Of COURSE she's gonna say something embarrassing! She can't keep
her mouth SHUT!' He sat up. 'Wait just a goddamn minute! How the HELL did
she get a teaching job in here?'
Bulma grinned and waved index cards. There was a simultaneous groaning, and
her grin widened. "I heard that I'm supposed to give THESE to
you." Then she ripped them up and tossed them over her shoulder.
"However, I know *I* hate READING the damn things as much as YOU hate
WRITING them. So, if I ask you a question, answer me. And I'll show you all
kinds of shit to record it and test for lies. So, when you say your dog ate
your homework, I'll know if it actually DID."
Bulma turned around and the guy next to Trunks let out a low whistle.
"Damn."
Trunks growled and put his head on his folded arms. "This is so NOT
good."
Bulma turned around with the infamous attendance book. Grinning, she nodded
at it. "Let's get a few of my rules straight. You cut my class, I'll
personally kick your ass. You can only chew gum if you're planning to use
it instead of glue, and if I hear ANY comment about my looks. not only will
*I* put you in the hospital, my husband will PERSONALLY hunt you down and
kill you." With a cheerleader-like shrug, she grinned and started to
call out the names of 25 white-faced boys.
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As
the class went on, Trunks found that the only time his mother even LOOKED
at him was when she called his name for attendance. Feeling a little
better, he sat up and even wondered why she wasn't being a total, overly
loud, annoying bitch.
'She's treating it like a business meeting,' he realized. 'And she HATES
talking to people she knows there.' Grinning, he sat back and twiddled his
thumbs as the others struggled with equations he'd known perfectly since
babyhood.
Bulma shook her head as the kids repeatedly failed. "Didn't ANY of you
read the course requirements?" she demanded, hands on hips.
"Obviously NOT!" She heaved a sigh and turned to the board.
"You ALL have to know algebra and geometry to pass this class. Not to
mention that you can't be a perfectionist. You'll drive yourself insane.
This is trial and error." At this, she looked at Trunks and motioned
him to the board. Wondering what she was up to, he obeyed. Placing her
hands on his shoulder, she grinned. "Like this. *I* wanted a girl.
Trial and error."
Trunks grinned as the class laughed. "Yeah, and this is ALSO trial and
error. I have VERY good hearing, and if *I* hear any of you talking about
my mother, you most likely won't have to worry about EITHER of my parents
because I'll get to you first. And IF I don't kill you, THEN my father
will. Except I've been around my mother too long to MAKE mistakes."
With that, he bowed and sat down, shooting a glare at the boy next to him,
who was trying to find out how to turn invisible.
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Trunks met up with Goten after class, and it wasn't hard to see that the
young Saiyan was royally pissed. "So, how was your day?" he
asked, amused.
Goten shot him a glare. "That goddamn fucking woman is EVERYWHERE!
She's my chem teacher!" he ranted, threatening to turn Super Saiyan.
"And I'm ALREADY banned from experiments the whole damned YEAR! Chem
is no fun without playing with chemicals! I mean her eyebrows will grow
back!"
Trunks glanced at him. "Sounds eventful. Guess who my shop teacher
is?"
Goten glared at him. "If you tell me the principal, I'm NOT taking
pity on you."
Trunks shook his head. "Nope. My mother."
Goten just looked at him stupidly for a minute, then started to laugh.
"O, Kami, that's good!"
Trunks didn't look amused. "It isn't bad, but then again, it's really
PATHETIC!" When Goten wouldn't stop laughing, Trunks merely dragged
him through the halls. Life with Goten was NEVER boring.
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Especially when it came to lunch. Trunks grinned as the dark-haired boy
scouted out a place to throw his capsules.
"Dammit! They're EVERYWHERE!" Goten growled over the noise of
half the school being packed into the room. "Where the HELL am I
supposed to eat?"
Trunks shrugged and shoved three tables back against the wall, careful not
to either break them or the bones of anyone behind them. "I don't
know. This is my spot."
He grinned innocently as Goten swore under his breath, then his eyes lit
up. "Jackpot!" Trunks groaned as his best friend opened the door
and tossed the blue capsule on the first step. Instantly, a long table
popped up under a red-and-white-striped tent, covering the food.
"Buffet," he cackled, wandering into the tent to get his lunch.
The lavender-haired boy only watched, shaking his head in amusement as the
teacher on duty alternately rubbed his eyes and blinked before grabbing the
arm of a passing teacher and hauling the stumbling woman over to the pair.
With an inward moan, Trunks plopped down in his seat as he watched the
already infamous Mrs. Pigme march over to the foot of his table, the glare
on her face almost worthy of Vegeta.
"WHAT do you think you're doing?" she demanded, her clipboard
appearing out of nowhere. Even Trunks couldn't see where it had come from.
Holding a chicken leg to his mouth, he looked down at it before returning
his gaze to the irate woman. "Eating," he answered in the
"isn't it obvious" tone he used with Goten more often than not.
As expected, that wasn't the answer she was looking for, and green eyes
narrowed. "Really? ALL of that? How many lunches did you steal?"
Closing his eyes, Trunks bit his tongue to keep from laughing when he heard
the astonished cry of the other man. "None, MA'AM," he answered.
Keeping his voice blank took conscious effort.
"Hey! What the hell are you doing with that?" Goten shouted,
chasing his stolen food back into the cafeteria. "Dammit, I want my
lunch back!"
When the man showed no signs of slowing down, Goten shook his head and
lunged at the waving hand. The guy stopped short as he felt the breeze and
looked down to see his clenched fist empty. Glancing at the kid, he noticed
the presence of the bag full of ham and cheese sandwiches slung
nonchalantly over the boy's shoulder.
Trunks sighed and stood up, digging the red capsule out of his pocket.
"Let's put it away, Goten," he said, pressing the button on the
table before scooping up whatever didn't fit back in the original.
"But I'm HUNGRY!" Goten protested, growling as he went back to
his tent. Everything except the ham and cheese went back where it came
from, and, with an exasperated sigh, placed the blue cylinder into his
friend's outstretched hand.
With an irritated growl, Goten fell back into the chair next to Trunks,
almost not noticing the splintering sound. Trunks rolled his eyes but
looked at Mrs. Pigme, who was practically purple from holding her temper.
"Both of you, to the office. NOW!" she ordered, pencil flying
over the clipboard.
"Think they'll remember us?" Goten wondered out loud as they simultaneously
stood.
"Not a chance," Trunks replied with a small smirk.
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The secretary almost dropped dead when she saw the two innocently-smiling
boys. "You... you..."
Goten nodded at her in a gentleman-like manner. "Nice to see you
too," he replied to her stuttering and took a seat, putting his hands
behind his head before crossing his ankles and generally making himself
comfortable. Jerking his head in the direction of the chair next to him,
Goten grinned. "Nice to be home, ain't it Trunks?"
Vegeta's son smiled back and slid into the seat, propping his feet on
Goten's knees and laying back across the rest of the row. "Yup."
He closed his eyes and folded his hands behind his head. "Wonder how
many hours he's gonna try for this time."
The door to the office swung open and the principal stepped out, rubbing
his temples. He suddenly stopped to look at the grinning Goten, who was
waving cheerfully at him.
"Hello again, sir," the Son boy said.
Without a word, he turned and slammed the door behind him, but the Saiyans'
keen ears could hear him rattling a bottle of pills. Trunks sat up,
watching until he opened the door again. One hand rubbing at his head, he
beckoned for the boys to come in. With a heartfelt sigh, he slowly closed
the door, wondering what they'd done now.
"So, what are you sent here for?" he asked, closing his eyes as
he sat down in front of them.
"Well, sir, we were just trying to have lunch and--" Goten was
cut off as the door unexpectedly burst open. Bulma smiled sweetly and
smoothed her hair before joining the three men.
"Sir, I just wanted to talk to you about--" The principal shook
his head and put a hand over her mouth. Trunks smiled: the man obviously
got to know his mother before he hired her. It was the only way to get her
to shut up so he could get a word in.
"I don't know WHAT is going on with these boys, but I want them to
talk before I hear anything else." Removing his palm, he nodded to
Goten. "Go ahead."
Goten smiled at Bulma and began to speak. "Well, this lady really has
it in for us, but you see, we were just trying to have lunch. It IS
lunchtime and I'm missing it, but anyway, we had our tables out and--"
"Wait a minute. YOUR tables?" he asked, looking back and forth
between them.
"Yes, sir," Trunks replied. "My mother made them," he
said, motioning to Bulma, who stood cross-armed next to the principal.
The older man gave the teacher a strange look. Bulma sighed and shook her
head. "Do you remember Son Gohan's eating habits?" she asked.
Aged black eyes went wide and the tanned face paled. "Yes," he
said reluctantly, as if afraid to know what came next.
"Well, BOTH of them eat like that," she said, looking at her son
and his best friend. "So, instead of them cleaning out the cafeteria
everyday and ME having to pay for it all, I made them something to keep
their OWN food in." She held out her hand and Trunks tossed her one of
the unused capsules.
She set the invention down on the table and smiled as the man picked up it
up. Turning it over, he shook his head and let it drop back onto the hard
surface of the table. "THIS is what the fuss was all about?"
"Actually, it's what's INSIDE the capsule is what the fuss is all
about," Trunks informed the man. Pushing the table back as far as it
would go, he tossed the orange cylinder in his hand before tapping the
button on top and letting it drop a few feet away. A blue-and-white-striped
overhang attached itself to the wall and three buffet tables dropped down
from underneath it, all in a fraction of a second.
Trunks grabbed the back of Goten's shirt as the other boy's mouth began to
water. The principal's eyes were wide as he stood to look at the Saiyan
meal spread before him.
Shifting his grip on his friend to the other hand, Trunks smiled at the
man. "Actually, that one goes outside."
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Goten stretched as he waltzed out of the office, grinning. Trunks strolled
along behind him, nodding even though the boy was -- surprisingly -- no
longer talking. "Well, that wasn't so bad," Goten said, looking
at his best friend, who was obviously ignoring him.
A devious smile crossed his face as Trunks nodded. "Is Vegeta a
pansy?" he asked, which included a nod from the other boy. Biting back
a laugh, he continued. "Are you in love with Bulma? What about
me?" Both answers were affirmative and Goten giggled despite himself.
Trunks was slowly coming back as he realized that Goten wasn't just
talking. He was laughing. Heart sinking, Trunks listened for the next thing
he said.
"Hey Trunks. Have you ever thought about stealing Videl from
Gohan?" So in the habit of agreeing, he nodded without thinking before
smacking himself on the head. Goten swallowed a harsh laugh and blinked at
Trunks innocently. "I'm gonna have to tell him that," he said
seriously.
Not even wanting to think about the kinds of questions he must've asked
before, Trunks decided to settle on pounding the boy now for that one.
Unfortunately, he didn't get the chance as Mrs. Pigme came racing up behind
them.
"Great Dende, what did we do now?" Goten groaned as he turned to
face the elderly woman.
"How the hell could we do ANYTHING? We've been out for 30 seconds!
Even for us..."
The grizzled old woman panted, glaring at them still. "Your mother
just called," she finally said, standing straighter. "Something
about Videl..."
"The BABY!" Goten cried, grinning. "Hey Trunks, I'm gonna be
an uncle!"
"Great Dende, help us all," Trunks muttered as he let Goten drag
him along.
Bulma was waiting in the office, car capsule in hand and grinning over her
shoulder. "You boys ready?"
"Hell yeah!" Goten shouted as he stopped behind her. Trunks took
the capsule before Goten could somehow do something to it and clicked the
top. Tossing it a short distance away, he grinned and made an "after
you" movement.
"Come on, cornball," Goten said, grabbing Trunks' polo shirt and
yanking him in his wake. Trunks shook off the insistent hand and dashed for
the door.
"So, how was your day?" Bulma asked as she put the car into
flying mode, then set the coordinates for the hospital.
"Pretty good," they admitted. "Except for that DAMN woman
who was EVERYWHERE." Then Goten grinned at Trunks and added, "But
still. It IS only the first day of school!"
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