Chapter 3: A Nerdy Tin Man
The next morning, Jack had a quick breakfast of fruit he found on the wild trees growing around, and their journey resumed. Yet, after a while, Jack heard a sound.
"Oy vey! Help!"
It was muffled, but it still sounded desperate. "What was that?" Jack said.
"Don't know," the Scarecrow answered. "Me not see anything."
"Help!"
"It's coming from the forest!" Jack said immediately bounding in that direction. He came upon a man made of metal standing like a statue with an axe raised above his head.
The man said through a closed mouth, "I don't believe it. Someone actually came!"
Jack could see the man was badly rusted. He cut off a large piece of his robe and started polishing the man. He got off all the brown rust, but the man still couldn't move.
"Thank you," the man said. "I never looked better. Now, could you please get my oil can in that shack and oil my joints?"
Jack nodded and did so. He oiled the man's mouth first, so that he could speak more comfortably. As he inspected the man's face, Jack recognized the scientist who invented the marauder robots that nearly defeated him. "Extor?"
"The name's Chopper. Nicholas Chopper. But you can call me Nick," the man replied.
"Nick Chopper?"
"That's right."
Jack oiled his arm that was holding the axe and swiftly brought it down. Nick groaned. "Did that hurt?"
"Oh no, it felt wonderful. I've been holding that axe for a year, maybe even longer. I'm so grateful that you came and saved me."
After about an hour of oil and elbow grease, Jack declared. "Finished. High five?"
"What?"
"High five?"
"What?"
"High five?"
"I don't understand."
Jack shook his head. "Never mind. It doesn't make much sense to me either. How would a robot get in such a condition?"
"What's a robot?"
"As I understand it, a robot is a machine that looks and functions like a man."
"But I am a man. I'm just made out of tin."
"I see. You were made out of tin and sprung to life, like the Scarecrow there."
"No. I was a man before I was made out of tin." Nick sighed. "It is a long a depressing story."
"I am in no hurry."
So Nick flashbacked. Jack could see it like last time, but this story required more narration. "I was once an ordinary Munchkin woodsman, but I was in love. She was a beautiful girl named Nimmee Amee." To Jack, she looked a lot like Ikra. She was scrubbing the steps of a large castle. Her face lit up as she saw a young man in Munchkin clothes wearing glasses.
"Nick! I was hoping you'd come!" she cried as she embraced him. "What would you like to do tonight?"
"I was thinking a game or two of chess."
Nimmee looked a little disappointed. "Chess. Alright, as long as I'm with you."
"But," Nick narrated, "she was the slave of the Wicked Witch of the East, and she didn't want anybody to take her slave away!"
A sinister shadow fell on Nimmee and Nick. Jack couldn't see her, but he could hear her scream in anger. Nick and Nimmee looked up in terror. She held up her torch. "A curse be upon you!" she cried. A bright light appeared and enveloped his axe. "Now," the witch declared, "whenever you think of my slave, great harm will befall you!"
Jack saw Nick starting to chop a tree. "I had a difficult choice to make. I had to either stop working or stop thinking about Nimmee. I found it to be quite impossible." The man stopped chopping, looked off in the distance, smiled, and sighed. At that same second, the blade of the woodsman's axe slipped off its handle and hit where Jack couldn't see. "AAAAAAAAGH!" the woodsman screamed. "MY LEG!!!!"
"The cursed axe had cut my right leg clean off. It was painful, but my career was my greater concern. What good is an one-legged woodsman? But I had an idea. I was experimenting with tin-smithing at the time. I had this neat idea of making some assistants out of tin and doubling my productivity. I used my limited knowledge to make a new leg out of tin for me." Jack watched as the man examined his tin leg. "There. Good as new."
"But the same thing happened with my other leg. Nothing daunted, I made another leg out of tin with me. When my right arm was cut off in the same manner, I knew I was in trouble. A woodsman must have both arms, and I can't very well make me an arm out of tin with one hand. So, I had to let Nimmee in on it."
Jack watched the woodsman meet Nimmee at the same castle at sundown. "Nimmee, I need your help."
"Certainly. What do you nee--oh my goodness! What happened to your arm?"
"That's why I need you. I'll explain everything." He took Nimmee to his shed and explained her about his tinsmith project. "I need you to be my second arm."
"Nick, you know I would love you even if you had no arms."
"I know, Darling, but I want to provide for you. And in order to do that, I need to have all my appendages in working order."
"We made my right arm just fine. And the same thing happened with my left arm, but we fixed it together. By then, I thought there was little the witch could do. Was I wrong." The young woodsman started daydreaming again, and the blade slipped and crashed right down on him. Everything went black.
"It killed you?" Jack cried.
"Oh no. Nothing dies in Oz."
"But that can't be. I just--"
"NOTHING dies in Oz."
Jack was confused, but he said, "Very well. Sorry for interrupting."
"It's alright. I felt that this was the end, but luckily Nimmee found me."
Nimmee came around a tree and cried out in horror. "Oh no! Nick!"
"She worked long and hard into the night, finishing the job that we had started. By morning, she had me a complete tin man."
"Oh, Nick, your body is so shiny and beautiful. Let's marry now and live happily forever and ever!" Nimmee hugged him, but Nick didn't reciprocate. "What's the matter, my love?"
"I, I don't feel it anymore."
"Feel what?"
"Love. For you." Nick put his hand on his chest. "You didn't make me a heart!"
"There wasn't anything in the plans for a heart! Perhaps you could show me how to make one, and we'll patch one in for you."
"No. A heart of tin will not substitute for a heart of flesh."
"Can't you marry me anyway? We came this far."
"I know, but I don't think you'll be happy, Nimmee. Without a heart, I cannot love you."
He got up and started to leave. Nimmee started to cry. (It may have been a little too vengeful, but Jack thought it looked good to see the woman who betrayed him with a broken heart.) She called after him, "Well, if you ever do find a heart again, I'll still be here, waiting for you! Farewell!"
The flashback faded. "She probably is still waiting for me, to this day."
"Will it make you happier to know that she is now free?" Jack asked.
"She is?"
"Yes. I destroyed the Witch of the East in coming here. Quite accidentally, though."
"Well, good for her. But after breaking up with Nimmee, I felt more dedicated to my work. Nothing could stop me now. If my axe slipped, it wouldn't scratch my tin. I was sure I was invulnerable. But you know what they say, 'Pride goeth before a fall.' I was careless to leave my oilcan in the shed and chop on a rainy day. Over all that time, I thought about how much I missed my heart. All the joy it gave me whenever I saw my Nimmee Amee, how it beat in my chest and even made me nervous around her. What I would give to have my heart once again!"
"But you do have a heart!" Jack asserted. "Without a heart, you wouldn't have felt guilty when the ultra-robots destroyed all those innocent cities. You wouldn't have helped me defeated them, and they would have annihilated every place everywhere."
"Come again?" Nick asked.
Jack shook his head. "What I mean is, it is a foolish desire to have a heart, for hearts break so easily. With great joy comes even greater sorrow. Many men who have hearts wish they did not."
"Well, I had one, and I want it back. Then I will go back to Nimmee Amee and marry her, and we will be happy for the rest of our days."
"You come with us," the Scarecrow finally said. "The Wizard of Oz can help you. He gonna give me brains, and he gonna send Jack home. He can get you a heart."
"You think so? Then, please, would you let me join you?"
Jack nodded. "Very well."
"Terrific! I will have a heart once again!"
"You have brains?" the Scarecrow asked.
"I used to. I was a very intelligent lad, but I think I prefer a heart to brains. Brains do not make a man happy, and happiness is the most wonderful feeling of the world."
"Don't know. A fool won't know what to do with heart if he had one. Brains are better. What you think, Jack?"
"I think we should continue our journey." Jack did not want to argue which was better, a brain or a heart.
"Oh, of course!" Nick cried enthusiastically. "Let's go!"
The next morning, Jack had a quick breakfast of fruit he found on the wild trees growing around, and their journey resumed. Yet, after a while, Jack heard a sound.
"Oy vey! Help!"
It was muffled, but it still sounded desperate. "What was that?" Jack said.
"Don't know," the Scarecrow answered. "Me not see anything."
"Help!"
"It's coming from the forest!" Jack said immediately bounding in that direction. He came upon a man made of metal standing like a statue with an axe raised above his head.
The man said through a closed mouth, "I don't believe it. Someone actually came!"
Jack could see the man was badly rusted. He cut off a large piece of his robe and started polishing the man. He got off all the brown rust, but the man still couldn't move.
"Thank you," the man said. "I never looked better. Now, could you please get my oil can in that shack and oil my joints?"
Jack nodded and did so. He oiled the man's mouth first, so that he could speak more comfortably. As he inspected the man's face, Jack recognized the scientist who invented the marauder robots that nearly defeated him. "Extor?"
"The name's Chopper. Nicholas Chopper. But you can call me Nick," the man replied.
"Nick Chopper?"
"That's right."
Jack oiled his arm that was holding the axe and swiftly brought it down. Nick groaned. "Did that hurt?"
"Oh no, it felt wonderful. I've been holding that axe for a year, maybe even longer. I'm so grateful that you came and saved me."
After about an hour of oil and elbow grease, Jack declared. "Finished. High five?"
"What?"
"High five?"
"What?"
"High five?"
"I don't understand."
Jack shook his head. "Never mind. It doesn't make much sense to me either. How would a robot get in such a condition?"
"What's a robot?"
"As I understand it, a robot is a machine that looks and functions like a man."
"But I am a man. I'm just made out of tin."
"I see. You were made out of tin and sprung to life, like the Scarecrow there."
"No. I was a man before I was made out of tin." Nick sighed. "It is a long a depressing story."
"I am in no hurry."
So Nick flashbacked. Jack could see it like last time, but this story required more narration. "I was once an ordinary Munchkin woodsman, but I was in love. She was a beautiful girl named Nimmee Amee." To Jack, she looked a lot like Ikra. She was scrubbing the steps of a large castle. Her face lit up as she saw a young man in Munchkin clothes wearing glasses.
"Nick! I was hoping you'd come!" she cried as she embraced him. "What would you like to do tonight?"
"I was thinking a game or two of chess."
Nimmee looked a little disappointed. "Chess. Alright, as long as I'm with you."
"But," Nick narrated, "she was the slave of the Wicked Witch of the East, and she didn't want anybody to take her slave away!"
A sinister shadow fell on Nimmee and Nick. Jack couldn't see her, but he could hear her scream in anger. Nick and Nimmee looked up in terror. She held up her torch. "A curse be upon you!" she cried. A bright light appeared and enveloped his axe. "Now," the witch declared, "whenever you think of my slave, great harm will befall you!"
Jack saw Nick starting to chop a tree. "I had a difficult choice to make. I had to either stop working or stop thinking about Nimmee. I found it to be quite impossible." The man stopped chopping, looked off in the distance, smiled, and sighed. At that same second, the blade of the woodsman's axe slipped off its handle and hit where Jack couldn't see. "AAAAAAAAGH!" the woodsman screamed. "MY LEG!!!!"
"The cursed axe had cut my right leg clean off. It was painful, but my career was my greater concern. What good is an one-legged woodsman? But I had an idea. I was experimenting with tin-smithing at the time. I had this neat idea of making some assistants out of tin and doubling my productivity. I used my limited knowledge to make a new leg out of tin for me." Jack watched as the man examined his tin leg. "There. Good as new."
"But the same thing happened with my other leg. Nothing daunted, I made another leg out of tin with me. When my right arm was cut off in the same manner, I knew I was in trouble. A woodsman must have both arms, and I can't very well make me an arm out of tin with one hand. So, I had to let Nimmee in on it."
Jack watched the woodsman meet Nimmee at the same castle at sundown. "Nimmee, I need your help."
"Certainly. What do you nee--oh my goodness! What happened to your arm?"
"That's why I need you. I'll explain everything." He took Nimmee to his shed and explained her about his tinsmith project. "I need you to be my second arm."
"Nick, you know I would love you even if you had no arms."
"I know, Darling, but I want to provide for you. And in order to do that, I need to have all my appendages in working order."
"We made my right arm just fine. And the same thing happened with my left arm, but we fixed it together. By then, I thought there was little the witch could do. Was I wrong." The young woodsman started daydreaming again, and the blade slipped and crashed right down on him. Everything went black.
"It killed you?" Jack cried.
"Oh no. Nothing dies in Oz."
"But that can't be. I just--"
"NOTHING dies in Oz."
Jack was confused, but he said, "Very well. Sorry for interrupting."
"It's alright. I felt that this was the end, but luckily Nimmee found me."
Nimmee came around a tree and cried out in horror. "Oh no! Nick!"
"She worked long and hard into the night, finishing the job that we had started. By morning, she had me a complete tin man."
"Oh, Nick, your body is so shiny and beautiful. Let's marry now and live happily forever and ever!" Nimmee hugged him, but Nick didn't reciprocate. "What's the matter, my love?"
"I, I don't feel it anymore."
"Feel what?"
"Love. For you." Nick put his hand on his chest. "You didn't make me a heart!"
"There wasn't anything in the plans for a heart! Perhaps you could show me how to make one, and we'll patch one in for you."
"No. A heart of tin will not substitute for a heart of flesh."
"Can't you marry me anyway? We came this far."
"I know, but I don't think you'll be happy, Nimmee. Without a heart, I cannot love you."
He got up and started to leave. Nimmee started to cry. (It may have been a little too vengeful, but Jack thought it looked good to see the woman who betrayed him with a broken heart.) She called after him, "Well, if you ever do find a heart again, I'll still be here, waiting for you! Farewell!"
The flashback faded. "She probably is still waiting for me, to this day."
"Will it make you happier to know that she is now free?" Jack asked.
"She is?"
"Yes. I destroyed the Witch of the East in coming here. Quite accidentally, though."
"Well, good for her. But after breaking up with Nimmee, I felt more dedicated to my work. Nothing could stop me now. If my axe slipped, it wouldn't scratch my tin. I was sure I was invulnerable. But you know what they say, 'Pride goeth before a fall.' I was careless to leave my oilcan in the shed and chop on a rainy day. Over all that time, I thought about how much I missed my heart. All the joy it gave me whenever I saw my Nimmee Amee, how it beat in my chest and even made me nervous around her. What I would give to have my heart once again!"
"But you do have a heart!" Jack asserted. "Without a heart, you wouldn't have felt guilty when the ultra-robots destroyed all those innocent cities. You wouldn't have helped me defeated them, and they would have annihilated every place everywhere."
"Come again?" Nick asked.
Jack shook his head. "What I mean is, it is a foolish desire to have a heart, for hearts break so easily. With great joy comes even greater sorrow. Many men who have hearts wish they did not."
"Well, I had one, and I want it back. Then I will go back to Nimmee Amee and marry her, and we will be happy for the rest of our days."
"You come with us," the Scarecrow finally said. "The Wizard of Oz can help you. He gonna give me brains, and he gonna send Jack home. He can get you a heart."
"You think so? Then, please, would you let me join you?"
Jack nodded. "Very well."
"Terrific! I will have a heart once again!"
"You have brains?" the Scarecrow asked.
"I used to. I was a very intelligent lad, but I think I prefer a heart to brains. Brains do not make a man happy, and happiness is the most wonderful feeling of the world."
"Don't know. A fool won't know what to do with heart if he had one. Brains are better. What you think, Jack?"
"I think we should continue our journey." Jack did not want to argue which was better, a brain or a heart.
"Oh, of course!" Nick cried enthusiastically. "Let's go!"
