Disclaimer: To the advantage of Ms. Rowling and the demise of myself, Harry Potter (and all characters not as important) do not belong to me.

Lily pushed a strand of curly red-gold hair behind her ear as it fluttered in the winter wind. Fat snowflakes swirled down onto the London streets, lighting upon the huge train station behind her and lending the city a sort of clean charm. People bustled about James, Sirius, Peter and her, bags full of goods to put under the Christmas tree.

When James had told her they were all spending winter break in France, she had been out of her mind with excitement. Lily had never traveled anywhere outside of England before, and this was a great first. However, she had sobered a bit when she remembered her engagement with Voldemort. Would he be able to find her in France? What happened if he couldn't?

She assured herself with the thought that if the most powerful Dark Wizard in history couldn't find a not- quite- full witch, then he didn't deserve the title. Lily still hadn't told James about the upcoming encounter, though, even if he did know that she was a Death Eater. She knew what she had to do, and she knew if she told James he would go mad with jealousy. She couldn't afford to have him barging in and getting himself killed, so therefore such things were better left unmentioned. She wondered silently if she was forever condemned to keep secrets from James. Just when she opened up to him, that was when she had to close off again and suffer for it.

In spite of all this, Lily was determined to enjoy as much of her vacation as she could.

"Where is Remus?" whined Sirius, pulling his jacket closer about himself, "I'm freezing to death!"

Remus had disappeared into the crowd in search of his Aunt, who was going to lead them all to a portkey hidden somewhere in the London streets, providing transport for the group of travelers. It was not a traditional way of transport, given, but it was very normal for them.

"He'll probably be back soon," soothed James, pulling their luggage closer to him in order to keep people from tripping over it.

Sure enough, Remus appeared a few moments later with a middle-aged woman dressed in a fur coat and hat. Her graying chestnut hair was pulled back into a tight bun, and her blue eyes ran over them sharply before she greeted them.

"Is zis them, Remmie?" she said with an imperial air. Like Remus' mother, she had a French accent, but hers was much stronger and more noticeable.

"Oui…I mean, yes," said Remus, switching back to English so that they could understand what he was saying. "This is Lily Evans," Lily gave a gracious smile and held out her hand, which the woman took solemnly, "this is James Potter, this is Sirius Black, and this is Peter Pettigrew." The woman shook each of their hands in turn.

"And this is my aunt, Marie Cretier," added Remus, almost as an afterthought.

"Zen let us go," she said, and turned on one spiked heel to march off in the opposite direction. The rest of them struggled to gather up their suitcases and went rushing after her.

"She doesn't seem very polite, does she?" scoffed Lily, a little annoyed by the woman's brevity.

"She could at least wait for us," grunted Sirius, shifting around his suitcases in order to get a better grip on them. "And who wears spiked heels in the snow?"

Marie led them to a dark alleyway, and then stopped in front of an abandoned trashcan. "Let us all 'old 'ands," she commanded.

Lily maneuvered her suitcase onto her feet, and grabbed James's, then Peter's hand. Marie then reached out, gripped the trashcan's lid, and Lily soon felt the familiar tugging behind her navel. The world went spiraling away, and then returned again as she crashed into the ground in an unceremonious heap with the rest of her friends. Only Marie was left standing.

"I will be inside. You can get organized and zen I will tour you around my 'ouse," she said, and left them all lying there.

"Oh yeah, she's a lovely woman, Remus," said Sirius, giving a wry little smile.

"She might not be one for first impressions," said Remus, "but once you get to know her she's not half bad. She's just a little…ahh…"

"Stuck up?" offered Sirius.

"Then again, most of the French are," said James.

"Yeah, thanks," Remus said dryly.

"Oh, not you Remus," said James, "you're British."

"You'd do better to keep your opinions to yourselves," scolded Lily, brushing her hair out of her face and struggling to her feet. The sight that greeted her caused her mouth to drop open in astonishment. Marie's home wasn't a *house*, it was a *mansion*! The huge building reminded her of Hogwarts, only on a much smaller scale, and a lot more modern. The fresh granite walls matched the white of the newly fallen snow, and the courtyard was lined with pine trees strung with lights. The windows glowed a cheery yellow, matching the distant glowing city behind it…Paris.

"Oh, it's beautiful!" she exclaimed.

All four boys turned to see what she was talking about, and reacted in much the same way.

"Wow," sighed James.

"I guess I should have mentioned that she was rich," said Remus wryly, who was already ahead of them dragging his suitcase through the snow, up the huge driveway.

"I have a feeling that this is going to be a *great* vacation," said Sirius with an impish grin alight on his face.

*****************

After an extensive tour of the mansion, Lily found her association of the building with Hogwarts was not too far off the mark. The large stone hallways, the great dining hall, and various moving pictures and suits of armor all served to give the edifice a definite Hogwart-sy feel. It even had a local ghost that could be seen sweeping through the halls once in a while. They called her "Rose", and she was a small mischievous girl with a quick smile- Lily rather liked her. Apparently she had been an orphan when she was little, had run into some trouble on the streets, and now contented herself visiting various houses of the area in her spectral form.

When the tour was done, the friends congregated around the huge dining table for dinner. Personally, Lily didn't know why one would need such a big table if they were living by themselves, but she didn't voice her opinion. Marie seemed to dislike them enough already- she spent most of her time ignoring them and doting on her nephew. Lily wondered that if when Remus had said she wasn't half-bad, he had meant that she wasn't half-bad when she was talking to *him*.

Marie's house-elves had brought out an exotic meal for them, and James and Sirius had spent the first ten minutes shouting across the table at each other, debating which of the myriad of silverware to use first, while Marie looked on distastefully. Eventually, they gave up and picked up the one that came to their reach first.

The meal was delicious, the drink was great, and the company was well kept. Before they knew it, all of them were up in their respective bedrooms, preparing for sleep. Lily sat down on the edge of her fluffy mattress, bouncing slightly in the process, and admired her surroundings. The room had dreamy look to it- the canopy of the bed floated lazily, a wispy powder- white mesh, and the dark green carpet resembled a graceful patch of spring grass. There was a single arched window across from the foot of the bed, three times Lily's height and nearly the width of the room, with the same wispy material serving as curtains. Lily pulled them back tonight, revealing the white half moon and stars shining brightly in the crisp winter night. The moonlight illuminated the room, tracing patterns and shadows across the walls and floors. She closed her eyes and sighed happily, playing the edge of the silk sheets between her fingers.

"Lily," James said softly behind her, causing her to nearly jump out of her skin.

"Oh! I didn't hear you come in," she cried, her voice muffled near the end of her exclamation by James's hand.

"Shhh," he soothed her, his face close to hers, his eyes shining brightly in the semi-darkness, "I'm not supposed to be here, remember."

She shoved his hand away and leaned in closer to him, her voice a low conspiratorial whisper, "What *are* you doing here?"

"I'm just visiting my favorite person during the holidays. Is there any crime in that?" he whispered jovially, plopping down beside her on the bed.

"There is when you aren't *supposed* to be doing it. Remus's Aunt specifically said…"

"Oh, she's got her nose too far up her arse to notice, anyway."

"James!"

"It's true."

Lily thought for a moment, then laughed softly. "It is."

"See? I'm always right," smiled James, snaking an arm around her waist.

She leaned her head comfortably on his shoulder and commented "Well. Not always."

"When was I not?"

"Hmmm. I seem to remember a time when a certain someone said there was no possible way McGonagall would catch him cheating, and then had to spend a day doing detention, *and* failed the test. And then there was…"

"Alright! Alright. But *most* of the time I'm right."

"Most of the time," Lily conceded, and they lapsed into a comfortable silence.

"Lily?" James asked, a bit hesitantly.

"Yes James?" she answered, twisting around her head in order to get a better look at him.

"What's wrong?" he said, catching her off guard.

"What? Nothing's wrong."

"Yes, there is. I may not always be right about some things, but I'm always right about *you*. I've known you for seven years, and there's definitely something wrong. You've been too withdrawn lately, Lily. So tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing. *Really*," she said with conviction, trying valiantly to keep her secret hidden from him.

"C'mon. You know you can tell me. You've already told me about being a Death Eater, right?"

"I…" she began, but stopped, lost in thought. If she told James, he surely would prevent her from carrying out her plan, and then he would be killed. She couldn't allow that…because if he died, then she would die too- at least, spiritually. She would not allow him to be hurt for her sake. She had to push him away, to save him. It would be hard, but she had to, for his sake. And hopefully her sanity would endure thereafter.

"James, we should end this," she whispered, staring down at her hands wringing in her lap. Her voice was remarkably composed, she thought, for being so torn inside.

"W...what?" murmured James, sounding absolutely pitiful.

"I said, we should end this. It isn't working James."

"What do you mean this isn't working? If it's because of the Death Eater thing I…"

"No James, don't make this harder then it has to be," Lily sighed, standing up and walking to the window.

"I'm sorry this is just…quite sudden," he said, edging up behind her. "And fishy. I ask if something's wrong, and you respond by pushing me away. Let me guess…this has something to do with Voldemort."

"No! No. Yes. Maybe." Damn him, why did he have to be so perceptive?

"No, yes, maybe?" he asked wryly. "So which is it? You know you can't keep things from me." He slid his arms about her waist, and hugged her close.

So much for pushing him away. Maybe she was lucky, for having such a faithful man. But he was getting in over his head. /Like you are already? He's a grown man. Let him make his own decisions…like you did./

"Severus told Lord Voldemort about you. He was upset that you had supposedly tricked him, so he went to Voldemort and told him that I dated you. Lord Voldemort…well, I don't know if he can truly love someone. Maybe it is love. Or maybe obsession is the right word. But either way, he's infatuated with me, apparently, and when he found out…he said that he would kill you. And Remus and Sirius, too... I guess that had something to do with Severus. So I made a deal with him…he's to come to me, the night of Christmas eve, and I'm going to…change his mind." Her confession had come out in a rush of words so fast, that she wasn't sure James had caught it.

But he had. "Exactly what does…changing his mind entail?" he asked dully.

"Sleeping with him." Lily said simply. There was no point in dancing around the fact.

James went silent behind her for a while. He was doing some quick thinking, Lily recognized.

"I'll go to him, Lily, and I'll fight him…"

"No, James, this is exactly why…"

"…and you won't have to…"

"…I won't have you getting hurt…"

"…and then all the horrible stuff that's been happening…"

"James, no! No. You can't. Lord Voldemort is *not* Snape. He's not weak. If you fight him, James, you'll be seriously hurt, and I won't have that. I forbid you to fight him."

"You can't forbid me to do anything!" cried James, his eyes flashing.

"Then, we should end it."

James sighed, and ran a hand through his hair, trying to get his temper back under control. "Come what may," he murmured.

"What?" asked Lily.

"Come what may," he repeated, louder this time. "We can't let this come between us. No matter what happens, we can't let it affect our relationship. Because we made a promise… come what may."

"But…how can I trust that you won't come after me? That you won't be jealous?"

"I won't," James said firmly.

"Do you promise?"

"I promise. Come what may."

"Come what may," Lily agreed, hugging James close. "And everything will be alright, won't it?"

"Everything will be fine, Lily."

Then his mouth came down upon hers, and all the worry melted away. That night, James did not leave Lily's bedroom.

*****************

As James and Lily were having their encounter, Remus and Sirius, who had decided that they couldn't sleep, were playing a game of wizard's chess in front of Marie's huge fireplace in the living room.

"Check," called Remus with a smug smile.

"Damn," cursed Sirius softly. The only way to get out of it was to sacrifice his queen. Remus's own queen was busy making threatening gestures at her.

But it felt good to be hanging out with Remus again, even if he was losing. Somewhere along the line, and Sirius wasn't quite sure when, Remus had given up on being angry at him and the two had started to talk again. However, neither one of them ever mentioned the incident at the Shrieking Shack.

"C'mon, Sirius, you know what you have to do," Remus said, a definite predatory grin on his face. There were times when Remus behaved almost exactly like the wolf, although they weren't often.

"Oh, I know what I have to do, I just don't feel like doing it," said Sirius lightly. An insistent tapping on the living room window saved him from making the suicidal move.

"What's that?" said Remus curiously, walking over to the window and sliding it open. An owl flew in, and circled a few times around the living room, before perching on Remus's shoulder and allowing him to untie the message that it carried. Once the burden was gone, it flew straight out the window again.

"That was a ministry owl," said Sirius, propping his chin on his hand and studying Remus curiously.

"It's addressed to me," said Remus, sounding a bit amazed. He quickly slit open the envelope and began to read the message. His face went pale, and the letter dropped to the floor through numb fingers. "Oh my god," he said in a barely audible whisper.

"Remus what? What is it?" cried Sirius, on his feet in a heartbeat.

"It…I..." stammered Remus, still in a state of shock. Then, he abruptly turned from the room and dashed up the steps.

"What the hell?" murmured Sirius under his breath. He walked over to the forsaken letter and read it.

Dear Mr. Lupin,

We of the Ministry of Magic are sorry to inform you of an attack on our headquarters this morning. Your parents were among the casualties. We express our deepest sympathies to you, and implore you to arrive at the Ministry as soon as possible so that matters may be worked out between us.

With deepest regrets,

1 Tom Bradbury, Magical Casualties Branch

"Oh, God," gasped Sirius. "Remus…" Remus's parents had died! Quickly pocketing the letter so that no one else could read it, he dashed up the steps after his friend.

"Remus!" he called softly, knocking on his bedroom door.

"Go away, Sirius," came Remus's reply, weak and tearful.

Sirius, however, ignored him and tried the doorknob. It was unlocked.

Sirius tread softly into the room, and shut the door behind him. Remus was perched on the edge of his bed, head buried in his hands.

"Moony," he said gently, sliding down next to him. "Remmie, you all right?"

"Yes, I'm fine, everything's perfect," he said sarcastically between sobs. "My whole world's only gone crashing down around me! Goddamnit, Sirius, what do you think? Yeah, my parents die every f***ing day, by now I'm used to it."

"Hey, calm down, I'm just trying to help you!" cried Sirius defensively.

"Yeah, well, you're not doing a very good job of it," Remus answered with a bland smile. "I told you, just leave me alone."

Sirius, however, was adamant. "No, you shouldn't be alone now."

And with that said, he drew Remus into his arms. Remus struggled half- heartedly, then gave up and melted against Sirius's side. He buried his face in Sirius's neck and wept.

Sirius was at a loss for words. All he could do was hold Remus, and murmur meaningless comforts. After all, this had never happened to him before- the tragedy had never struck so close to home. What does one say to a friend after -as Remus had said- their whole world goes crashing down around them?

His confusion then turned quickly to anger. He raged silently at the world for putting Remus in such a compromising position in the first place, for making him live with the curse of being a werewolf. He damned Voldemort for his reckless spreading of death and destruction. He probably didn't care that he took away the only true family that this boy had. He probably didn't even think twice before whipping out his wand. Then he raged again at the world for being so cruel as to destine that Remus's parents would die.

Remus was alone now. And, Sirius knew, he hated being alone. It scared the hell out of him, just a little less then did the full moon. Maybe it was because society had hated and shunned him all his life.

Then it hit Sirius. Yes, that is what he would say to him, that is what was probably bothering him most.

"Remus," he said softly, holding his friend at arm's length. He found Remus's gaze and held it, eyes burning with a rare truth. "Remus," he repeated. "You are not alone. I promise, I will always be here. I…and James, and Lily, and Peter… we will be your family now. You're not alone, do you hear me? We love you. All of us. I…" Sirius hesitated, and looked down to stare at the bed sheets. "I love you."

Remus took hold of Sirius's face gently and forced him to look at him again. What Sirius found there, in his gaze, startled him. It was love, bright and burning, and gratitude, and sorrow, all at once. It was the most intense gaze that Sirius had ever experienced. Because, Sirius noticed, it was not just that Remus was looking at him…it was the wolf, too. His eyes shone golden in the dim.

"Thank you," came his reply, in a hoarse whisper. "Thank you, Sirius. I love you, too."

For the second time that night, Sirius found that he was at a loss for words. But this time, it was okay, because he found that he couldn't speak anyway- Remus's lips were covering his own.

How long they stayed like that, Sirius didn't know, but eventually they broke apart, and Remus buried himself in Sirius's arms. They laid like that together for the rest of the night, just taking comfort in each other's presence, and forgetting about the rest of the world. Happiness was rare these days, and when you had it, you tried your best not to let it go.

A/N: Tsk, tsk, such language Remus! But the poor man- I don't know why I torture my characters so.

In any case, I know it's been a while, but I've finally recovered from a horrible case of writer's block and lack of time! I'm back! So what did you think? Don't forget to review…I'm a total review junkie^-^ (And please no flames about S/R, or I'll find out where you live and come after you!) LOL…just kidding. But please, NO S/R FLAMES!

Next chapter…traveling the infamous Paris nightclubs! ^-^