1 And Realise That You Are Not Alone

Chapter 4:

"Good morning Severus." He sat down in a chair opposite Honor.

"What was it you wanted to talk about?" he looked at her with concern.

"Oh, nothing serious. I really just wanted to say thank you for last night, if it wasn't for you being there a student would probably have found me in the morning. That would be most annoying and embarrassing." Severus' concern disappeared but was not replaced by a smirk or sneer.

"Honor, it's quite alright." He leaned forward and took hold of her hand "If you ever need to talk, I'm here. Remember, I know how it feels to lose the ones you love."

"I know I'm not alone because Voldemort has destroyed so many lives and yet I feel as if I am alone, was it the same for you?" Honor stared into his eyes as they began to fill with hurt.

"It was and it still is," Severus gently squeezed her hand and averted his gaze to the rug. Honor stood up and made him stand up too, she looked into his eyes once more, flung her arms around his neck and pulled him close. She was the same height as Severus so they just stood there with their arms around each other. Honor rested her chin on Severus' shoulder as he laid his hands on the small of her back.

"I-I'd better go. I've got some marking to catch up on, so then, I'll see you at lunch." He broke off and turned to the door, Honor sighed and then walked towards the window. Looking out she saw the forest, so quiet, so peaceful and yet so dangerous.

"So, Honor how did your first lesson go?" professor McGonagall strolled into the teachers lounge.

"Oh, very well thank you Minerva. How was yours?"

"Satisfactory, those second years have forgotten almost everything over the summer though. Never mind, eh?" Honor nodded in agreement "when's your next lesson?"

"After lunch."

"I suppose you have every thing sorted?"

"Oh, yes of course! I have fourth year Slytherins, we will be revising palmistry." Minerva nodded and looked quite impressed.

"It's nice to know you have it organised. You do realise that the Slytherins have gotten even more boisterous since you came here, don't you?"

"Yes, I will have everything under control, I know how to handle them." She smiled and headed towards the door "Thank you for your concern Minerva. I'll see you down in the hall." Honor smiled to herself as she walked down the halls, not many people had seen the look of bewilderment on Minerva McGonagall's face.

When she walked into the hall she received a few uncertain glances from the younger students and other houses. But Honor ignored the expressions and continued to smile.

When she sat down at her seat next to Severus, she looked at the vast array of students in front of her. This was a large school; the amount of students had increased quite dramatically since she had been taught there. The same four tables, with the same four emblem tablecloths and the same four competitive houses. Some one had obviously put a lengthening charm on the tables to accommodate so many students.

"I don't think that food will keep warm for too long Honor." It was Severus' silky voice that reminded her to eat.

"Sorry, I was just thinking." She said as she came back from her thoughts.

"That was pretty obvious. If you don't mind me asking, what were you thinking about?"

"Oh, it was nothing important. I was thinking about the size of the school."

"Too many students, it's over crowded." He interrupted.

"I thought the same thing, although I think it's only slightly crowded."

"How many years ago were you here?" he asked changing the subject.

"Ooh, I'm 24, so that's about 7 years ago. The school wasn't as crowded then. How about you?"

"It's been 17 years since I was taught here and a lot has happened in that time, too much has happened in that time." He momentarily drifted on his past and then came abruptly back down.

"Severus, did you ever study divination?"

"Yes, I did, for a while." He glumly looked down at his mutilated potatoes.

"Why did you stop? If you don't mind me asking."

"I stopped because of these." Severus showed her his hands, Honor looked up at him puzzled "In my third year we got up to palmistry, when the professor was reading my palms, she fainted. Later on she told me that-that…" Severus couldn't carry on; he got up and swept out of the hall. Honor followed him.

"Why are you running away from it?" he stopped down the corridor when he heard her voice.

"Because there is nothing else I can do." Again he swept away from her around a corner, this time Honor did not follow him.

*

"OK then, a Slytherin class, my first one. Professor Snape has promised me that you will be attentive and helpful," yes that was a lie, Severus had said no such thing, but with Slytherins you have to be cunning to survive "I do hope that is true. Today we will be revising palmistry, I am sure that professor Trelawny did it with you, but I am also sure she didn't predict much else but your death. Am I correct in saying so?" a few of them nodded their heads and others giggled. "Alright then, firstly I would like everyone to form an orderly queue in front of me. I will read your palms and note down any information, then you will partner up and read each other's palm. Nearer the end of the lesson I will hand out my results and you can compare them with mine. Right then, let's begin!" Honor sat down in her chair and surprisingly the Slytherins formed a calm queue in front of her and the reading commenced.

A tall girl with dark, wavy hair called Jenny Curtis was first in line, she stretched out her right hand and looked attentively down at Honor. She glanced at the girls palm and scribbled down a few notes, this girl was certainly going to be loved later on!

An hour later all of the students were staring at each other's palms and looking up the meanings.

"Make sure you write them all down, I'll be handing out my readings in a minute!" she started shuffling through her notes and handing them out to the appropriate partner. "I will me setting some homework," students groaned "but it will be simple. All I want you to do is read one of your friends' palms, make sure they aren't doing divination. That's it then!" the students filed out of the room and Honor followed them, it was time for dinner and she had just had a double lesson. She also wanted to talk to Severus about what he had said earlier, she hadn't had time to read his palms before he exited the hall and she wanted to find out.

As soon as Honor finished her food she got up to walk out but stopped before she got to the side door she lowered her head and whispered into his ear "We need to talk Severus." She turned her back on him and left.

Honor walked down to the dungeons, the last time she had been there was after her last potions lesson and that was seven years ago. She walked into the potions room, Severus was still up in the hall and Honor sat on the edge of a desk.

Severus walked in with his head bowed, which made his hair fall on to his face. He didn't see Honor until he was sitting at his desk.

"I think now is the best time to talk, don't you?" she stared at him from the back of the room. Severus hung his head and massaged his temples.

"If we must." He raised his head with his eyes closed. Honor jumped off the table and walked up to his desk. "You know, lately every time I close my eyes I can see the picture of her being tortured by him."

"Then open your eyes Severus, he is not here, I am." He slowly lifted his eyelids to reveal his dark eyes.

"I'll never be able to forget her." His eyes glazed with tears.

"No one expects you to erase memories, I don't think that anyone who has ever encountered and survived him will ever forget the atrocities that he caused. But you have to move on one day. It may not be some time soon, but one day you will realise that there is a future for you and only then you will be able to dull down your pain." Honor watched as a tear fell slowly down his pale cheek. He sighed and looked back up at her.

"You are the only one that has ever understood what I'm going through. Has the pain dulled for you?"

"What do you think? Would I cry that much if the pain had gone or even faded?" she knelt down beside his chair and placed a hand over his. "But I know, one day it will and it will be the same for you. It all takes time." He stared straight into her blue eyes and understood, another tear fell it was then that he realised something.

He was no longer alone.



Disclaimer: I own no one except Honor Blissett!!

I thought that was quite an emotional chapter! PLEASE REVIEW!!!