GALCOM's Saturntron Enterprises along with Stars Incorperated Present...
An ATC and JSW fic...
TOTAL RECOIL!
Chapter 2! We make things go "BOOM!!!!!"
JSW: Boom? I no like boom!
ATC: Then why are you holding bottles of nitro in an earthquake testing chamber?
JSW: *Looks at said bottles* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! *throws them at Bob*
BOB: CHOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!!!!-
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!"
ATC: O.o;;;; Bob? Oh well, ON WITH THE FIC!
O.o; o.O; O.O; o.o;
The princess watched the prince run off being chased by the palace guards.
She knew that her mother knew that he wasn't a spy, but was worried none the
less. She watched a firework, set off in her honor soar into the sky to
detonate into hundreds of glittery sparks. This was followed by another one.
She watched it go up and up untill... the sky lit up in a blinding white flash
that was followed by a mighty clap like thunder. Slowly she got up from her
spot on the ground, that last firework packed a wallop. She looked outside to
see what kind of pretty sparks that one left in it's wake... or would have if
the mile long Star Cruiser wasn't blocking the view of the stars.
==== ==== ==== ====
Admiral Tigerclaw frowned at the Chronometer. He had replaced some of the
parts on it with those of a Soda machine. The piece of junk had eaten all his
spare change and then preceded to spew out about fifty Dr. Peppers, Pepsis, Coca
Colas, and Sprites. Very quickly the bridge was becoming a mess of sticky foam.
But this time at least it worked.
"I should have stayed with the old parts." ATC said, wading through a sea
of foam. "At least I got ritcher from it."
The holographic view screen flashed to life to show JSW on the bridge of
the Jupiter II.
"Hey ATC I don't think-WHOA!" JSW's eye's bugged out seeing the huge mess
the bridge of the GALAXIUS was immersed in. "What happened?"
ATC frowned as he reached his chair. "The new parts for the Chronometer
went berserk."
JSW shook with barely contained laughter. "Looks like a soda machine blew
up."
ATC frowned some more. "Look left." He said and snapped his fingers.
"Wha?" JSW looked to his left.
"WHAM!!!!!!!!!"
JSW fell over, a throwing mallet implanted in his head. ATC struggled
into his chair and pressed a button. A moment later the bridge was free of
foam. JSW stood back up and looked at the screen.
"So, when are we now?" JSW said, podering how that mallet got on his ship.
"It doesn't seem like we went anywhere."
"Well." ATC said. "I checked the chronometer, it seems we've only jumped
five months forward in time."
"Looks like one heck of a party is going on down there."
ATC looked up at the screen. "That's not just any party. That, is a royal
engagment party."
JSW frowned. "If we only moved five months forward in time... we saw the
princess before we left, which means..."
"Yes." ATC said. "That's the Princess' royal engagment party. Which puts
us on the very date of the final battle."
JSW thought for a moment. "Wouldn't that put us right in the line of
fire?"
"Most likely." ATC said as if it didn't matter. Just then the bridge
doors opened and in walked a guy with a cat on his shoulder. ATC turned around.
"Clawz, Pyro, you finaly got here, we're already into chapter two."
Pyro, the guy with a backpack, spoke up. "The Authors had a bit of trouble
locating us."
"Yeah." Said the cat. "It seems we were notified of this fic by mail,
which Pyro blew up for the seven hundredth time."
JSW, who was still onscreen, looked amazed at the guy with the backpack.
"Who are they?" He asked.
ATC turned back to the holographic screen. "These are two of my team, the
guy with the backpack is Pyro-Maniac. The cat is Clawz, he can turn into a
panther at will, so he's not as cute as he seems.
JSW had a real soft spot for cats, and it surfaced all at once.
"Awwwwww, how cute."
Like a flash, Clawz lept off Pyro's shoulder and morphed into a large
black panther. He growled at the screen.
JSW sweatdropped and stepped back, looking over to pyro.
"Sorry, I have a thing for cats. So why does Super mario looking guy here
get called Pyro-Maniac anyway?"
ATC went deadpan.
"He can identify any explosive on sight, wire a bomb before you can blink,
and carry any amount of explosives in his pack."
"But you said he was a maniac, and Clawz said he blew up the mailbox,
which means he... must... like... to...." JSW looked at Pyro on the screen.
"What is he doing?"
ATC turned around. "He's-" and saw Pyro wiring a 100 gigaton H bomb to his
chair.
"WHAM!!!!!"
Pyro fell over but recovered realy fast.
"Awww PLEASE! Just this once?!?!" He practacly begged.
ATC frowned. "You detonate that thing and there'll be no moon left for
ANYTHING to conquer."
JSW pailed.... in fact, he was splashed with white ink.
"Um.... What he said." He stated pointing to ATC.
ATC sighed. "Why, oh WHY did the authors put these guys in our fic?"
JSW, who recovered his normal color shrugged.
Pyro spoke up again. "Maybe you guys might need us for something."
"Like what?" JSW asked.
"Um... something, I'm sure the Authors will think some weird reason up."
Pyro replied.
JSW sweatdropped. "They havn't actualy done anything lately."
Admiral Tigerclaw looked at the fic. "You dar- ERHEM... YOU DARE TO
QUESTION OUR POWER?!?!?!?"
Jupiter Star Warrior joined in.
"HOW DARE HE!!!! TIGER, YOUR TURN."
JSW frowned... "Oh no... PLEASE not that!"
"YES THAT!" Admiral Tigerclaw said and pressed the smite button. JSW was
hit with a bolt of lightning.
"Itai..." JSW says before falling over, the crew of the Jupiter II stared
in "shock".
ATC frowned as JSW started to recover. "THAT, is why I never cross our
Authors."
"I'm begining to see what you mean." JSW said as he stood up. He noticed
a stray arc of electricity jump across his body and started playing with it.
"So... THIS is how I got my 'electrafying' personality." He grinned.
"SHOCKING, isn't it?" He was imedietly struck by another bolt of lightning.
"I don't think the Authors liked that joke." ATC said.
JSW twitched on the floor. "I... guess not....." HE got back up. "Let's
take five for now... even with the jokes, our Authors must be running out of
conversation matter." And they had said lightning never strikes the same place
twice... well this is two times they were proven wrong now.
"I think you should stop making our authors angry." ATC said as he opened
a book of Kanji crosswords.
"I'll keep that in mind." JSW twitched out, as a medic checked him over.
.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'
Back in the palace, the party was in full swing as several dancing couples
made their way around the floor to the sound of the orchestra. The whole fiasco
stopped when a bright flash burst in through the windows. The lead band man
looked out the window and nearly fainted at the sight, two huge objects floating
high over the palace.
"What the HELL is that?!" He asked, as the crowd flocked to the windows
like birds. For minutes everyone just stared untill the Queen herself came out
to see what all the commotion was about. She was quickly directed to one of the
windows. A moment later the Queen turned around to summon her senshi.
Fifteen minutes later several Sailor Senshi and two lunar cats were on the
terrace staring up at the ships as Sailor Murcury worked her computer to figure
it out.
"You think it's from the dark Kingdom?" A very suspicious Luna asked.
"Well, whatever field it has protecting it is also blocking my scans."
Mercury said. "But it's very strong, and it's not a negative charge." She typed
a few more commands in her computer. "It doesn't seem to be doing anything but
just sitting there... but I am picking up chronometric energy distortions... as
if the whole thing came through a rip in time. That would explain why it's just
sitting there. Whoever is on it must be confused."
//////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\////////////////\\\\\\\\\
Back on the GALAXIUS...
"Hey JSW." ATC said. "Here's something... 28 down, a Japanese term
meaning stupid or dumb. That would be the word BAKA right?"
JSW thought for a moment on his end of the captains ready room com line.
"I would think so."
"That would mean two syllables, ne? So... what are the symbols for ba and
ka?" ATC asked, looking up at the moniter.
"Don't look at me." JSW said. "You're the one who likes those things."
ATC was about to reply when the Tactical officer of the GALAXIUS entered
the room.
"Sir, I think you should come see this." He said.
"Alright." ATC said. "JSW, I'll switch us over to the main com."
"Okay." JSW said and ATC walked out of the room onto the main bridge area.
"Hmmm...." ATC thought as he entered the bridge. "Number five down... A
word meaning teacher.... Six english letters, two syllables."
JSW's head popped up on a Holographic screen right in front of ATC.
"Sensei?" He said.
"DAH!!!"
"WHAM!!!!"
JSW sweatdropped at the sight over the screen. ATC blinked and stared at the
consol, that was behind the holographic screen, he had smashed.
"I don't know what you just broke." JSW said. "But I'm not paying for it."
ATC frowned and walked over to his TAC station as he filled out his
crossword.
"So what is it you wanted me to see?" He asked.
Meanwhile, JSW looked over at his sleeping TAC officer.
"Why do I get the bums, weirdos, lazies, and overall useless crew?"
The TAC officer motioned ATC closer to his consol.
"There is a low level negitive energy wave building in the earth's upper
atmosphere.
JSW went over to his TAC consol and knocked the officer out of the chair and
started hitting buttons.
"An energy wave?" ATC asked. "Explain."
JSW frowned at his display.
"This can't be correct." JSW said as he ran a quick system dianostic.
"It's energy polarity has dropped tremendously, it's far into the negitive
range." The TAC officer brought up an energy reading for ATC to view.
"This is strange." ATC said. "But it could be..."
Back on the moon the senshi were still staring up at GALAXIUS...
"That's odd." Came Sailor Mercury, who was still observing her scans. "I'm
picking up strange energy from beyond the ships.
Artemis looked up at the Senshi.
"What could it be?"
"Well." Mercury began. "It's massive and it's emmiting energy far into
the negitive range almost as if- ...As if it were the Dark Kingdom.
"WHAT?!?!?!?!" Came everyone's cry.
"SOUND THE ALERT!!!" Luna yelled. "We're about to be ATTACKED!"
On GALAXIUS, ATC was watching the strange energy with interest... it would
cost it alot of money.
"I don't like this." ATC stated matter of factly. "Yellow alert."
"ATC." JSW said in a worried tone. "I think we're in big doggie doo doo."
"HUH?" ATC said looking at his shoes. "I don't see any-
"That's now what I meant." JSW said.
"SIR!" Came the TAC officer's yell. "The energy wave has SPIKED!"
"WHAT?!" ATC shouted, and looked at the data. A moment later he started
barking out orders. "RED ALERT! BATTLESTATIONS! GET ALL SYSTEMS READY! WE'RE
GOING TO ENGAGE! JSW GET YOUR SHIP CLOAKED AND OUT OF THE WAY!"
"ALLRIGHT PEOPLE!" JSW shouted as he woke up the officers on the bridge.
"Let's get movin' and give the GALAXIUS room!"
ATC frowned at the darkness moving toward them from earth.
"JSW, you're still HERE! Why aren't you gone?" ATC asked. "Helm, give us
bearing mark one seven seven."
"I'm working on it!" JSW said. "Helm, evasive manuevers and cloak us."
"May our skill and power lead us to victory." ATC said.
"May I just keep my lunch" JSW's helm officer replied."
Back on the moon, the whole palace was on alert and watching the skies intently,
but none as much as Mercury.
"They're moving!" She shouted.
"What? How? What are they doing?" Voiced Venus.
"They seem to be turning to-WHOA!!!"
"WHAT! WHAT!?" Jupiter shouted, in a nearly paniced state.
"The big ships energy output has shot off the scale, the shields have gone
super strong, and whatever passes for weapons has just come on.
"Well don't just sit there, DO SOMETHING!" Luna shouted.
"We can't do ANYTHING from here." Mercury replied.
"What will we do?" Luna said sadly as she watched the ships high up in
orbit turn to face a powerful foe.
Back on GALAXIUS, the situation had gone from stressful, to downright mental
breakdown. ATC seemed to be the only one on the bridge not standing in a five
inch deep puddle of sweat.
"Stay cloaked JSW." ATC said. "Don't give yourself away."
"Should we stay cloaked?" Asked the Jupiter II's TAC officer
"Do as he says." JSW said.
Out in space, the dark energy paused in its advance as it spotted GALAXIUS
sitting in space. It sensed a POWERFUL force it had never experienced before.
ATC: I didn't breathe on it... did I?
JSW: We'll talk about your breath later.
"What is it doing?" JSW whispered over the com.
"It's confused." ATC said. "It has no idea what we are."
"Figures." JSW muttered.
"Head around for a flanking manuever." ATC said.
"Helm, do it." JSW ordered the helm officer.
"Sir." Said the tactical officer. "Energy buildup coming from entity."
JSW saw the buildup as the Jupiter II started it's flanking manuever.
"Shields direct full forward." ATC ordered.
"Um... ATC?" JSW asked. "Shouldn't I decloak for maximum shield effect?
Especialy if we engage?"
"Don't worry." ATC soothed. "You won't be attacked while you're cloaked,
and I have a fix on your position through the COM system so you won't be hit by
stray shots."
"SIR!!!" Shouted the TAC officer. "ENERGY BLAST! IMPACT IN 2-"
The bridge shuddered violently at the impact, JSW watched the hit from his ship
and freaked out.
"ATC! ATC!!! COME IN!!!!" He shouted.
"I'm still here." ATC said. "TAC, report."
"Shields dropped by 5 percent."
ATC grinned. "Let's say we have a little slugfest with this entity." His
face turned serious. "Open fire."
Like a clap of thunder the GALAXIUS fell upon the entity laying enough
energy and plasma into the entity that it could light up Tokyo for five years.
Wheather or not that's from burning buildings or electricity we don't know.
"Jupiter II, attack." ATC ordered.
"Decloak and open fire." JSW ordered.
The Jupiter II decloaked behind the entity and started pouring it's smaller yet
still impressive arsenal into it.
Meanwhile... but why does while have to be so mean anyway? Why can't it
be nicewhile? I'm sure people are quite tired of while being mean.
ATC: ~_~;;;
JSW: The Author's wandering again... can't they EVER stay on task?
AUTHOR TIGERCLAW: YOU DOUBT US???!
"ZZZZZZZZZAP!!!"
JSW: *fizzle* I-TAI.....
ATC: That's what happens remember?
JSW: I-wish the Author's weren't so sensitive....
ATC: MOVING ALONG....
JSW: Yeah, I want to get out of this rapid dialog mode...
Meanwhile, on the moon the Senshi were staring up at the rather large
pyrotechnics display that was lighting up the lunar sky better then any of the
fireworks earlier.
Mercury looked at her display again, frowning at what she was seeing. "Oh,
Kami! There's another ship!"
"What!?" Jupiter exclaimed, peering over Mercury's shoulder. The rest of
the Senshi peered over Mercury's shoulder, shocked at what they saw.
Mars looked at the sky to see what the matter was.
"The other ship is opening fire, too!" Mercury exclaimed. She then
gasped as she frowned at her display. "The dark energy is going toward the
moon!! It's ignoring the two ships!"
Back at the two ships, JSW sat in his chair, watching the battle. The
Jupiter II shook under stress as the dark energy fired another shot at them.
"Report!" JSW commanded.
"Shields are holding. 95%!" the tactical officer replied. "Sir, it's
away from Earth!"
"GALAXIUS, IT'S AWAY FROM EARTH!! USE THE STARCLUSTER CANNON!!!!"
ATCs voice responded "I see it! Get back so you won't get hit too!"
Back in space, the Jupiter II gave the Galaxius room to fire the
Starcluster cannon. A big ball of energy gathered at the front of the Galaxius
as the cannon powered up. Then, in one big flash, the cannon fired and the dark
energy disappeared after the bright light dissipated.
JSW: Rather anticlimatic for a BIG GUN.
ATC: All right! Just in time for the Fourth of July!
JSW: Um, it's not that time in History yet...
On the moon, Mercury and the rest of the Senshi gaped at space after the
explosion from the bigger ship. "They..."
"Won."
Mercury looked at her computer display and dropped it. "Um, we have a
problem..."
Elsewhere on the moon, an army of soldiers approached the castle. They
crushed the different statues of the Kingdom and started terrorizing the
inhabitants of the moon. The Dark Kingdom's soldiers came at full force,
destroying anything in their path. The alarm was sounded and the inhabitants of
the moon immediately were called to action.
Statues and lives were being destroyed as JSW watched helplessly from his
ship. He gritted his teeth and cracked his knuckles. With the being destroyed
and off of space, JSWs crew went back to their normal naps. JSW had to bat away
an annoying sweatdrop as he looked at ATC through the viewscreen. By the look
in ATCs eyes, he too saw what was going on and frowned.
"Well, looks like we get to kick ass and chew bubble gum," ATC said.
"But, I'm all out of bubble gum," JSW finished as he grabbed his gunblade,
glasses, and trench coat.
ATC grinned and showed him a pack of bubble gum. "Funny, I have plenty."
JSW sighed and said "Meet me on the moon and bring Trident because it
looks like I'll have to use my 'secret weapon'."
Moments later, JSW materialized on the moon and looked around him. He
raised an eyebrow as magic raced towards him. He held up his left hand and
Reflect surrounded him, sending the magic back to the caster. Putting down his
hand he commented "Tough battle" as ATC materialized next to him. ATC was wearing
that dark combat outfit of dark sunglasses, long, black trench coat, and a sleazy
smile only ATC can muster.
Suddenly, a Youma jumped in front of JSW. JSW responded by withdrawing
his gunblade and started hacking away at the Youma, who slashed at JSW with its
sword-arm attachment.
ATC, calmly looking at the battle before him, spoke up, "Looks bad. Shall
we give 'em a real fight?"
JSW, still fighting the youma, responded, "If you want!" He finished off
the youma with a devastating blow that knocked its head off. JSW had to sweatdrop at the Author after the ocean scene
replaced him wiping off the Youma-crap off of him.
ATC: What's wrong?
JSW: I dunno… I could've sworn that I was surrounded by ocean and tides
and such.
ATC: That wasn't your imagination… That was for real.
JSW: Can we PLEASE get out of this rapid dialogue mode, PLEASE?
So, with that settled, another youma appeared next to ATC, who waved at it,
saying, "Hi there!"
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAgh!!!!!" responded the
Youma.
Meanwhile, another Youma stepped next to JSW, who tapped him on the
shoulder. "What?" JSW responded to the Youma, turning to face it. "YIKES!
FIRE 3!!" The Youma burned to toast as ATC cast Oblivion on the rest of the
Youma, which pretty much takes care of Youma 3 – 250.
JSW: I didn't know the Authors kept track of the Youma…
A-JSW: IT IS VERY HARD, LET ME TELL YOU THAT.
JSW: *shrugs* Not my problem.
A-JSW: YOU WANT IT YOUR PROBLEM!?
JSW: O.O N-NOT REALLY!!
A-JSW: GOOD!
ATC: *butting in* Can we get out of Rapid Dialogue mode and get on with the
plot?
JSW and A-JSW: THERE'S A PLOT??
ATC: -_-;;;;
Meanwhile, more Youma snuck up to the group and one actually hammered a
blow to JSW.
"OOOOOUUUUUUUUUCH!!!!" JSW cried as ATC tapped the shoulder of the Youma.
The youma faced ATC.
"Who the
!@%@%$#@^!@%$#@$^@%#@^!@%$#^!@^%$#^@#&@%^!@%$^!@^@$^%#$&@#%#$&@#$^%#!%#$&@#%$&@#
$^%#$&@^%^&@^#&@^#$^@&^%@$^@^#^#@$^$%!^%@^@#^$#&*^%%*@#^%$#!#%#@!@%#@^#@%$$#@^!%
$#%^ are you?" the Youma asked.
"SORRY 'BOUT THAT. THE YOUMA SAID SOME NASTY THINGS THERE. I HAD TO EDIT
IT OUT," Author JSW explains to the sweatdropping JSW.
"Oh, right. I knew that," JSW, getting up from his recent clobber,
responded.
"I sometimes wish I knew who you're talking to, JSW," ATC commented,
yoinking the Youma out of existence with a cast of Paradox without a second thought.
"And I sometimes wonder how the hell you do that," JSW replies as he stabbed
a Youma behind him.
Suddenly, an overhead voice, who pushed the Author out of the way for one
moment, reverberated around the entire battlefield, crying "MORTAL KOMBAT!!!"
JSW and ATC recovered from the sudden reverberating voice and took their
battle stances to face the youma who were stupidly heading their way.
"CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY!" the voice said as ATC and JSW started doing some
crazy, wild, and downright amazing Martial Arts moves (that will leave the Author
bankrupt if it goes into more detail) against the youma. A lot of youma went
down. Plain and simple.
"I choose to be with Sailor Jupiter at this point," JSW commented, whacking
another Youma.
ATC sweatdroped at this and kicked a Youma where the sun don't shine.
Needless to say, this Youma would be in pain for the rest of it's life... which was about five seconds before the Katana of Kickass severed its life span.
"They are not here," ATC responded to JSWs comment.
"Exactly my point," JSW said as he punched the living daylights out of a
Youma. It fell to the ground and added another body to the ever growing pile of
Youma bodies. "That's why I want to be with her. I don't want to be here."
"We are a long ways away from Palaceland," ATC informed, tripping a Youma.
"What?!" JSW dodged a punch meant for his pea-sized brain of his.
("HEY!!!!" *Zaps the Author* "DON'T CALL ME A PEA BRAIN!!!!!"
AUTHOR: x.X;;; Itaii…)
"Then what are we doing here?! We should be where
there is no fighting going on!!" JSW whined.
"FLAWLESS VICTORY!" the voice exclaimed as JSW and ATC leapt over the Youma
to a part of the battlefield that was not yet swarmed by the swarming youma.
"DAMN!" JSW cried, casting Ultima on a group of Youma. They explode in a
powerful, blinding blast of green light.
ATC slashed at another Youma, "What?"
"We're still too far from the Palace!" JSW said, taking a small break, for
there is now a twelve-yard gap between him and the next set of Youma.
"Hmm… Take cover. I'm summoning Oblivion," ATC calmly stated. JSW
started to run for cover but quickly stopped in his tracks.
"WHAT!?! SHIT!!" JSW ducked in a trench as ATC summoned Oblivion, causing
a flash of light that was emitted from his palm.
In a strange reverb, ATC yelled "I SUMMON-ON-ON OBLIVION-ON-ON-ON!!" THEN
HE TOO TOOK COVER.
As the Author recovered from using the Caps Lock too much, Oblivion is
summoned and a HUGE, BIG-ASS EXPLOSION MAKES A TERRIBLE, SICKENING, DEAFENING
BOOM.
JSW: *cowering* I. HATE. BOOMS!!!
Meanwhile, back at the Palace…
The Sailor Senshi felt, watched, and, in fact, heard a large explosion
rumble off in the distance toward the scene of the battle. Sailor Jupiter, who
was pacing as the explosion rattled through the palace violently.
"WHAT ON THE MOON WAS THAT!?!" Sailor Jupiter exclaimed, recovering from
her recent fall on her cute butt.
SJ: WHAT A HENTAI!!
A-JSW: What!? You DO have a cute butt!!
SJ: GRR!! WHY I OUGHT TO SLICE YOU INTO FETTUCINNI!!!
A-JSW: Um… heh… Sorry!! ^.^
After the Author and Sailor Jupiter got done with their bickering, Mars
responded with "Um, that was an explosion of some kind."
Sailor Mercury, looking at her computer display terminal, responded with a
more accurate, and very confusing answer: "An explosion rating around a
condensed Giga-ton hyperatomic shockwave that should have vaporized the Earth's
only natural satellite into smithereens."
Everyone in the room, including the Queen, looked at Mercury and
facefaulted. Sailor Venus recovered from her facefault first and asked "Huh!?!"
Sailor Mercury rolled her eyes and provided a better response for the less
feeble mind, like this Author. "Basically, an explosion that should have
destroyed the moon just nuked an area of five miles, but didn't destroy the
moon."
JSWs face popped up in a scene push-over box and exclaimed "I HATE
BOOMS!!!"
Sailor Jupiter pushed JSWs window out of the way and asked "Why didn't it
destroy the moon?" She wiped the back of her hand across her forehead, for the
strain of JSWs Window was a hard push, that, and JSW was pushing back, trying to
get a kiss from Sailor Jupiter. Finally, Sailor Jupiter had to slap JSW, which,
strangely, made him cry.
Sailor Mercury responded with "It was contained by an unknown force."
ATCs own little pop-up window appeared and exclaimed "The Authors (~_~),"
then disappeared.
"And what of these damn window push-over things? They are starting to
annoy me!" Mars growled, glaring at the spot where ATC disappeared and lit
her thumb up like a match.
Mercury just looked at Mars and gave a look that said "I don't know."
"So, is the threat over?" Venus asked as a youma-army battle cry
reverberated in the distance. Everyone in the room swallowed hard as the scene
cut to…
JSW and ATC's position…
Dodging a spell cast by a youma, which caused a loud explosion, JSW cried,
"I hate BOOMS!!! And now there are more youma to deal with!!"
"I don't think we got them all," a fried ATC said, "But I think they
noticed us."
Casting his Ultima spell against the youma troops, JSW yelled, "YOU
THINK!?!?!"
Suddenly, JSW and ATC were surrounded by a flock of sword-wielding youma,
points of the swords right at JSW and ATC, who backed up some. "Yeah, they know
we are here," ATC calmly commented, withdrawing his Katana of Kickass.
"Right, okay…" JSW said, taking a deep breath to calm him down and
withdrawing his Gunblade. "…Let's kick ass!"
"I have a better plan," ATC said as-a-matter-of-factly.
"You have a plan," JSW sighed in disappointment, "WHAT ABOUT MY KICKASS
PLAN?! *sigh* What is your plan?"
Explaining his plan, ATC, well, explained his plan. "We are faced with an
army five times that of a collosseum. We are both low on magic power…"
JSW raised an eyebrow and checked his Magic Points. "Damn! So I see."
"…So, I propose that I slice a hole in that wall and we RUN!"
Looking around him curiously, JSW observed, "What wall…?"
A-JSW: OOPS!! *places a wall where ATC indicated in the story*.
JSW: Damn authors!
A-JSW: *hits the SMITE button above JSWs name.*
JSW: O.O YEOUCH!!
ATC, who was toting JSW when JSW got smited by Author-Jupiter Star
Warrior, commanded, "Do not insult the authors when I'm towing you."
"Well, at least you got smitten, too," JSW observed as ATC made his way to
the wall the Authors so conveniently placed for our "heros".
"You wanta go back and fight off the youma yourself?"
"O.o;; Heh... no."
More youma surround ATC and JSW as they backed into the wall, swords held high
and ready to strike anyone, anything, and something, if they moved. JSW started
panicking as the radius between him and the next youma closed.
Breaking in tears, JSW cried "GREEEEEEAT! NOW WE'RE SURROUNDED BY MAN-
EATING MONSTERS WHO WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO GET OUR FLESH!!" JSW lifted up his
palms and yelled "ULTIMA BEAM!" The beam struck the advancing Youma army, but
more youma replaced the ones who got destroyed.
JSW's face turned red as he started yelling at ATC. "YOU SEE WHERE WE'RE
AT NOW?! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! I CAN'T HOLD THESE MONSTERS OFF WITH ULTIMA AND
ULTIMA BEAM FOREVER! I'M ALMOST OUT OF MAGIC POINTS AND HAVE NO WAY TO RESTORE
THEM WITHOUT LEAVING THE FIGHT, AND YOU VERY WELL KNOW THAT I CANNOT LEAVE THE
FINE SAILOR JUPITER HELPLESS TO FEND ALL THESE UGLY MONSTERS ALL ON HER OWN!!!"
As JSW continued to rant endlessly, ATC calmly lead JSW into a shadow to
safety. Of course, JSW didn't notice this and continued to yell, bitch, moan,
and complain.
JSW: IF WE GET OUT OF THIS ALIVE, I'LL WRING YOUR SORRY LITTLE NECK AND
FORGET THAT THIS EVER HAPPENED! THEN, I'M GOING TO TAKE SAILOR JUPITER TO THE
BAHAMAS WHERE I'LL NEVER HEAR OF CRAZY LITTLE STUNTS THAT ALMOST GETS ME KILLED
JUST THINKING ABOUT THEM!!
ATC: JSW.
JSW: THIS WAS A VERY BAD IDEA THAT YOU HAVE GOTTEN US INTO! WE ARE NOW
MORE THAN DEAD; WE'RE DEAD MEAT! DID YOU SEE ALL THE SALIVA AND DROOL AND SPIT
FROM ALL THOSE YOUMAS!? THEY WERE PRACTICALLY READY TO DIGEST US AND EAT US!!
ATC: JSW!
JSW: THIS IS THE END OF THE WORLD AS I KNOW IT! I NOW KNOW SAILOR PLUTO
WILL NEVER RESTORE ME FOR FEAR I'LL DO THIS AGAIN AND AGAIN, AND I WANT TO MARRY
JUPITER, THE HOTTEST BABE IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE, AND NOW THAT'LL NEVER HAPPEN!!
AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!!!
ATC: *yelling at the top of his lungs* JSW! WE ARE SAFE IN THE CASTLE!!!
JSW: HOW ON EARTH I ENDED UP IN THIS MESS, I'LL NEVER KNOW…… *record
player screeching to a halt*. We're what?
Finally out of that hideously long Rapid Dialog mode, and FINALLY after
all the yelling JSW did, JSW looked around him and surveyed the area around him.
"So we are," he said, embarrassed.
ATC calmly nodded and said, "And we have company."
The Sailor Senshi stood and stared at the odd two-some.
A-JSW: OH, THAT SO DID NOT SOUND RIGHT!
A-ATC: Baka hentai!
JSW looked behind him and sweatdropped. "Heh, heh, heh… Hi…?" As his
eyes panned to beet red Sailor Jupiter, he started to stare at her. His eyes filled up
with hearts and he sighed "Such a hottie!"
Suddenly, ATCs mallet slammed JSW on the head as Sailor Jupiter blinked in
surprise and blushed.
"We have much more important things to worry about. Like how much my
stocks will crash if the moon gets blown to bits," ATC grumbled.
"But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, she IS a hottie," JSW stammered.
Sailor Jupiter blushed all the more.
"True," ATC said, "they're ALL cute, but what good is a cute corpse?"
JSW frowned. "She's not cute... she's a TOTAL BABE!"
"Whatever," ATC said, "we have work to do so quit drooling."
JSW pouted and watched ATC pull a small cube out of his pocket. "What's that?" he asked.
"Plot device." ATC said, then pressed the button on the cube and tossed it to the floor. "Stand back."
Everyone stood back and a moment later the hall was filled with a technologicaly advanced tactical operations and monitering center that only can be rivaled by the whole of NORAD.
ATC: NORAD in a pocket... what a concept.
JSW: O.o It has full situation monitering and communication systems.... you sure you didn't just compress the REAL NORAD into a subspace cube?
ATC: Now why would I do a thing like that?
JSW: ... Because you CAN????
ATC: You're learning. BACK TO THE STORY!
The senshi stared in shock at the room's trasformation as ATC walked over to a console and started tapping keys.
"GALAXIUS, give me a feed from the main sensors." ATC said. The screen lit up and a moment later the whole room was alight with data moving in and out of the system.
"Looks like a REALY big youma army is making it's way here... I give them thirty minutes."
JSW started to forwn. "Um... don't we want to leave the timeline alone and let them get killed like they're supposed to?"
Every person in the room gasped at the statement.
"Now look what you did." ATC said. "You just let them know what the future is... BAD JSW!"
"I don't think it matters." JSW said. "We've already screwed up time as it is."
ATC frowned. "Well, we didn't KNOW we were going to attack until we did. Now they knew they were supposed to die..." ATC looked at his watch... "ten minutes ago."
"Excuse me..." Sailor Mercury said. "Isn't there still a big army on it's way?"
"Oh yeah." ATC said. "We can just have GALAXIUS nuke em."
"What about civilians?" JSW asked.
"Oop, forgot." ATC said, sweatdropping. "I guess we have to handle them the old way. GALAXIUS, I need BOB, PYRO, and Clawz down here STAT."
"Oh NOT them!" JSW said exhaustedly. "Their walking demolitionists.... on second thought... their perfect for attacking monsters."
"But of course." ATC said... and the three requested persons materialized in the room in a shower of sparkles.
"Ech!" Clawz said. "It'll take HOURS to get these sparkles out of my fur. Who's idea was it to use glitter in the speacial effects?"
"You can blame the Authors." JSW said... and suddenly part of the ceiling fell on his head.
"Alright guys," ATC said. "We need a battle plan. How will we defeat a massive youma army without trashing the landscape with an orbital bombardment?"
"Well, you DO have that Wing Zero Custom from the GUNDAMVERSE in the Hanger."
"The WHAT!?" JSW said.
"The Wing Zero Custom." ATC said.
"A big mech robot." Pyro filled in.
JSW frowned. "Those make big booms don't they?"
ATC nodded.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
Everyone stared.
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"JSW..."
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"Shutup JSW"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"JSW?!"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"Would someone SEDATE him please?"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-'SLAM!!!!'-OOOOoooo'THUD!'....."
Jupiter rubbed her knuckles.
JSW managed to twitch out, "Does this mean we're going on that date friday night?" and passed out.
"Thank you," ATC said. "Now, where was I?"
Everyone stared blankly.
"You were in the palace." Said a grinning JSW.
ATC looked at him and did his famous 'cocked an eyebrow' look. "Aren't you supposed to be unconcious?"
"I get up to fast for my own good." JSW sulked, and suddenly shot over to Jupiter. "So how about that date?"
Jupiter sweatdropped. "I don't even know you."
"My name's Jupiter Star Warior, but you can call me JSW for short!" He grinned, sticking his hand out.
"You know." ATC said. "I'd hate to interupt you two and JSW's endless flirting with Jupiter, but unless you two want to have your date in the AFTERLIFE, I suggest you give me a hand."
JSW simply pulled a fake hand out of his pocket and hurled it at ACT where it smacked on his face. To everyone's astonishment, it wasn't a fake hand as ATC almost freaked to find out... but Thing from the Addams Family. Thing shook his... her... it's fist at JSW for throwing it.
"Jupiter, do me a favor and use a thunderbolt on him." ATC said.
JSW grinned. "Ah, but you forgot, I'm immune to electricity since my favorite senshi is Jupiter." Jupiter blushed.
"Right then..." ATC said as he walked over to the queen. "May I?" And snatched the silver crystal.
"SILVER COSMIC MEGA BLAST OF EXTREME VOLUME!!!!!"
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I-hate-BOOM...." JSW coughed out and fell over.
"Thank you." ATC said as he handed the crystal back to the Queen.
"You're mean." JSW said getting up.
ATC shook his head. "We have twenty minutes to intercept the army."
"I'm not helping you in any way-" And JSW launched into a long over explained rant that burned away ten minutes of their time limit.
Clawz: In ten seconds? What? How?
ATC: Don't ask.
ATC frowned at JSW's long explanation. "Ami, care to translate?"
Sailor mercury just stared blankly.
Omitting the fact that ATC used Mercury's real name, weather or not it was a secret at the time... a loud noise interupted the stagnant conversation... to be precise, it was HELLMARCH from command and conquer.
"Where the HELL is hellmarch coming from?" JSW asked.
"Well, omitting HELL since they took the day off... it's not me." ATC replied.
JSW walked to a balcony and looked way out across the area and spotted the sorce.
"DAMN!!!! Their carrying a BIG-ASSED STEREO!
ATC looked out the window gravely. (NO! NOT GRAVY YOU IDIOT!) "I guess we better get crackin', I'll beem up to GALAXIUS and get the Wing Zero Custom and JSW, you... JSW?"
JSW was buisily cracking walnuts with a nutcracker.
"JSW," ATC said. "You're getting PATHETIC. Quit with the stupidity or I'm throwing you to the Youma."
JSW pouted. "Oh all riiiigh." and tossed away the nutcracker. "So, what do we do first?"
"Well..." ATC said looking at his shoulder... where Thing was tapping away. "We get him/her/it out of our story."
"Why?" JSW asked. "It's only a hand."
Thing preceded to give JSW the 'finger'.
"Oh that was just not nice." JSW said.
"I know," ATC said. "How bout the Author's be nice and get Thing back to it's universe."
Thing dissappeared in a little white flash.
ATC: Q said he was doing special effects for this chapter.
JSW: I hope he doesn't decide to have a little "FUN."
ATC: Don't be silly, The Authors would smite him.
JSW: Oh...
"Let's rock and roll!" ATC said, and beamed back to the GALAXIUS. JSW, whipped out his Gunblade and checked how sharp it was.
"Shal we go HARM some Youma now?" He said. The Senshi agreed and they all took off out the hall entrance to go maim, crush, injure, kill, and destroy some youma.
JSW: Um, yeah, too much time with a thesaurus....
"CRACK!"
JSW: Shutting up...
------________--------_______-----
Queen Beryl smiled as her army reaped destruction upon the moon she hated so much, fires burned everywhere and the screaming was music to her ears. But one thing worried her, her master Queen Mettalia had dissappeared all at once after alot of bright flashes overhead... she could no longer feel Mettalia anywhere near. But it didn't matter, so far she had met little resistance, and what little of it there was she had destroyed.... other then some odd resistance her youma could get nowhere near a little while back... but it just up and vanished. Her youma had begged her to let them bring along some infernal contraption that made alot of noise... and it was playing some kind of music she never heard before, but the youma liked it, and they were even marching in step to its beat. Suddenly, several bright flashes and a crack of thunder caught her attention. She grinned, the Senshi had finaly retaliated. This was going to be fun, suddenly a much larger blast eradicated a ton of youma in front of her... her mood darkened further. A person was going to need headlights to see past it...
_-_-_-_-_-_
"ULTIMA BEAM!" JSW shouted nuking several Youma into something resembling a blue powder. The Senshi had used their attacks first and got a few youma, causing a bunch of them to clump up and charge... only to be Ultimaed by JSW. Listening to Hellmarch play over and over again was starting to get on his last nerve, and he let the youma know... by firing a shot from his gunblade at the box, blowing it to bits. Thanks to this, the youma not only lost their marching step, but it also enraged them... They roared a mighty battle roar and charged.
"DOUBLE TIME!" JSW shouted and fired Ultima after Ultima, stopping only to hack any youma that got to close with his Gunblade. The Senshi, having the youma filtered down to a minute portion, were having it easy. But JSW was doing all the work. And he was REALY going berserk... With a massive battle cry, BOB engaged the hoards in a rather insane display of stupidity... but the youma were to busy ducking the huge Katana he was weilding to notice. Clawz Simply snoozed nearby, and only got up to KILL any youma stupid enough to interupt his nap... Pryo was cackling with glee as he did what he did best, blow stuff up. And he loved every minute of it. The youma on the other hand, did not like being test pilots for his cruise missiles... which were never supposed to have pilots.
Sailor Mars launched a fireball and fried a youma and made her way to JSW.
"Isn't your friend supposed to be bringing some mega weapon or something?!?" She yelled over the roar of battle.
"I don't know what's takling him so long!" JSW shouted back. "But he normaly gets around to some heavy hammering when he wants to... ULTIMA BEAM!!!!!"
And of course things were doing what they normaly do for ATC...
.....,,,,,,.........,,,,,,,,.......
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'REPOSSESSED?!?!?!?!'"
Going all strait to hell...
ATC had just gotten to the hanger to find out that the Wing Zero Custom had been reposessed.
"A Mr. Yui came and said he needed it for something, and then up and offed with it." The officer said. "But you will be pleased to know that your Pouncer M2 Custom is finished."
"Did they get the new specifications for the Zero System Mark II working propperly?" ATC asked.
"It seemed to work fine in the test simulations. No one went insane and try to nuke everything."
ATC smiled, for once. "That's good enough for me!"
ATC hopped into the Pouncer M2 custom, we'll just call it pouncer for simplicity, and took off out of the hanger with an over-dramatic camera effect, which is going to bring the budget for chapter two all the way to the edge...
Back at the battle...
...........
"Ultima... BEEEEEAM!!!!!!" And JSW nuked another group. "They just keep comming!"
So far they had held off the tide of battle, but they were getting tired and the youma were still coming. JSW's gunblade was only useful as a blade now since he ran out of ammo, and the Senshi were fast getting more youma to deal with. Bob ran by chasing about fifty or so terrified youma, but that's Bob, Clawz was still trying to nap, and Pyro was almost down to WOMD (Weapons of Mass Destruction.), and ATC had said to avoid using the H-Bombs.
Beryl laughed from an overturned collumn as she watched the fighters fight a losing battle. She fired a few dark blasts which JSW blocked and irritated him. A youma finaly got the upper hand and was about to slice him into JSW pieces...
JSW: I DON' WANNA DIIIIIIEEEE!!!!!!
...When A giant metal foot stepped on it and crushed it like a cockroach.
JSW: I'm ALIVE!!!
Beryl ceased her laughter and stared at the huge mech.
"You call for backup?" The voice stated, sounding like Robocop.
"It's about time ATC!" JSW shouted. "We're actualy starting to get tired here! We almost had to send in the stunt doubles!"
"What stunt doubles?" Mars asked.
JSW: The ones we can't afford thanks to the Camera stunt.
ATC: Be quiet.
"Sorry." ATC said. "Let's end this... BERYL!" He Pointed at Beryl. "Send your best warrior to face me! If I win, you go away. If I lose, we leave and you can blast this palace all you want!"
Beryl took a second to think. "Very well." She said, and sent her warrior. "Shadow! GO!"
"YESSSS MASSTER!" A dark voice hissed, and out of the shadows a giant shadow... thingie made of squiggly lines and two red eyes appeared.
JSW: Our budget is so bad that we have three year olds drawing for us?!?!?!?
ATC: Don't worry, we'll get to the end of the fic... and our paycheck.
All ground combat ceased as the two giant combatants faced off. Shiney metal against... well, thick black squigly lines. ATC pulled out a beam saber and ignited it. The Shadow created a shadow sword... also of squigly lines. ATC turned off all outside com links, and put White Reflection on the Stereo system, which also blasted it across the battlefield... deafening anyone too close. Without warning both combatants charged, colliding with force and going into a melee mode where a whole buncha moves to fast to be propperly described happened, somehow they both found an opening and hit each other, and lept back. ATC crushed about three hundred youma as he did so, and the shadow just kinda float/stood there. ATC decided to change tactics. The shadow prepped for another charge, ATC crouched. The youma rushed forward, making the longest rushing yards in history, and with a flap of the metal wings, ATC lept into the air and took to the sky. The shadow turned and flew after him. The met in mid air and a massive airial melee followed, once again very fast. ATC prepared for a mighty hack with his saber, when it went out.
"Ugh..." ATC said. "Shoulda gotten Energizer."
The shadow, thinking the battle now belonged to it. Gave a triumphant roar and chased after ATC, but ATC had one last trick. He blasted away fast and reached over his shoulder, where he pulled a long oversized double barrel shotgun-like object. JSW, on the ground grinned at the site and put on some shades while handing the senshi Some. Beryl frowned not knowing what was happening.
ATC and the pouncer were flying backwards at an alarming rate, now spread eagle with a double buster cannon aimed at the fast approaching shadow. ATC pressed the "NUKE EM BAD" button. The creature saw the barrels of the gun glow yellow as it charged. ATC grinned as a whine filled the cockpit. The shadow made to dodge, and the Double Buster Rifle fired it's payload. A devastating blast ripped from the cannon to the shadow in under a second, and the shadow shrieked as it was ripped apart. As the blast faded, Beryl looked on stunned. Her greatest creature, thwarted by a... well, she had no clue what that was, but it was big.
"ATTACK!" She yelled, and the youma went back to attacking.
"I DON'T 'THINK!' SO!" ATC shouted and rotated to a better fireing position.
"GET DOWN!" JSW shouted as he saw it happening, and pulled everyone to the ground.
The double cannons fired again... and half the youma army were blown to dust. Everything went deathly quiet.
"Want to rephrase that Beryl?" ATC said.
The youma army paniced and fled the battlefield at a rapid pace. Beryl was now fuming.
"GET BACK HERE! YOU LITTLE COWARDS! GET BACK HERE AND FIGHT LIKE-" Beryl was cut off as the Pouncer landed on her, flattening her. The only thing left were her feet sticking out from under a foot. ATC hopped out of the pouncer and walked over to them.
"Well, you lose Beryl." He said.
The feet curled up and out of sight.
"Did I mention that I HATE BOOM!!!?" JSW said getting up and looking around. "Other then that, we WON. PARTY TIME!!!!!!!"
"Indeed..." ATC smiled. And they all went back to the Palace, several stunned Senshi in tow. JSW ended up falling back to Jupiter and walking with her while ATC continued walking by himself with a menacing look.
````````````~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`````````````
Twenty minutes later found the party back in full swing, even more so after that victory. JSW danced with Jupiter, JSW in a trance himself while ATC was going wild with the drums. ATC was starting to collect quite a croud at his drum work... Things were good.
Suddenly the palace door swung wide with a creak. Everyone looked up to see what was wrong. ATC and JSW stopped.
Sailor Pluto was standing at the door, a disapproving frown plastered all over her face.
"Ho boy..." ATC said quietly to JSW, who had slunk up next to him. *This can't be very good. She only shows up at important times."
JSW couldn't agree more.
"Where are they?" Pluto said. "Two guys, where are they?"
The croud parted and gave her clear view of ATC and JSW.
"Methinks we're in trouble." ATC said.
"THEY!" Pluto pointed at them. "Are messing up time. They should not be here."
The mood of the party went from happy, to graveyard. And it was all directed at ATC and JSW.
"Eh... heh." JSW sweatdropped. "We didn't mean to... realy-" Bob, Clawz, and Pyro shimmered blue and faded out across the room, no one noticed.
"Any time GALAXIUS" ATC barely mumbled, everyone heard that.
"Stop them!" Pluto shouted, too late, ATC and JSW shimmered with blue sparkles and faded away.
"DAMN!" Pluto said, and sat in a chair. Mars brought her some punch. "Almost had them that time. Now how will I fix THIS mess?
)))))))))))))))))))))))))
"That was a close one." JSW said over the com link to GALAXIUS.
"No kidding." ATC replied as he entered the bridge with his Kanji Crossword. "She almost trapped us against people we wouldn't DARE fight against.
"Ah, well... maybe we can get out of this time and find somewhere where she won't walk in and try to kill us." JSW said. He watched ATC flop down in his command chair. Something was off... "Um, ATC? wasn't there something on your chair before we left?"
Pyro entered the bridge, looking around. "Has anyone seen my 'Megakill' bomb? It's a one hundred gigaton H-bomb."
ATC and JSW looked at each other, thinking the same thing.
"AAWWWW SHIT!" They both said.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((
Pluto's ears perked up, there was an odd beeping noise coming from somewhere, she got up and looked around. This caught the Qeen's attention.
"What are you looking for?" She asked walking next to her. Pluto pulled something out from behind a curtain, a large metal box with a small one attached to it, it had numbers.
Seven...
Six...
Five...
Four...
Pluto was having a VERY bad day.
Two...
One...
---------------
A brilliant flash lit up the bridges of both GALAXIUS and Jupiter II. JSW plastered humself to the viewscreen of his ship shouting, "MAKOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-CHAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"HOLD ON!!!" ATC shouted. And then the shockwave hit, shaking GALAXIUS badly and knocking the the Jupiter II around. After it passed JSW and his crew got up off the floor. And he frowned.
"So much for saving the moon kingdom." ATC said.
"Well, I guess it was never meant to be." JSW said. "So when to next?"
"Anytime but now." ATC said, and punched in the Chronosphere. The GALAXIUS and Jupiter II dissappeared in a flash.
Pluto stood up from where she was crouching and looking at what when it went off. The dust that was all that was left of her uniform floated to the ground. Those tho... were starting to get on her nerves. She developed a rather violent eyebrow twitch and turned around... Summoning up her Timekey, she opened up a portal back to her time gate and went to get some new cloaths... and she just had the blasted uniform dry-cleaned too...
ATC: Ah... our paychecks... WHAT?!?!?!? We OWE 'THEM!?!?!?!
JSW: But, what, why, how? ARRRRGH!!!!!
ATC: Someone is going to die...
DISCLAIMER: We don't own them, we're not worth your time and money, get lost.
An ATC and JSW fic...
TOTAL RECOIL!
Chapter 2! We make things go "BOOM!!!!!"
JSW: Boom? I no like boom!
ATC: Then why are you holding bottles of nitro in an earthquake testing chamber?
JSW: *Looks at said bottles* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! *throws them at Bob*
BOB: CHOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!!!!-
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!"
ATC: O.o;;;; Bob? Oh well, ON WITH THE FIC!
O.o; o.O; O.O; o.o;
The princess watched the prince run off being chased by the palace guards.
She knew that her mother knew that he wasn't a spy, but was worried none the
less. She watched a firework, set off in her honor soar into the sky to
detonate into hundreds of glittery sparks. This was followed by another one.
She watched it go up and up untill... the sky lit up in a blinding white flash
that was followed by a mighty clap like thunder. Slowly she got up from her
spot on the ground, that last firework packed a wallop. She looked outside to
see what kind of pretty sparks that one left in it's wake... or would have if
the mile long Star Cruiser wasn't blocking the view of the stars.
==== ==== ==== ====
Admiral Tigerclaw frowned at the Chronometer. He had replaced some of the
parts on it with those of a Soda machine. The piece of junk had eaten all his
spare change and then preceded to spew out about fifty Dr. Peppers, Pepsis, Coca
Colas, and Sprites. Very quickly the bridge was becoming a mess of sticky foam.
But this time at least it worked.
"I should have stayed with the old parts." ATC said, wading through a sea
of foam. "At least I got ritcher from it."
The holographic view screen flashed to life to show JSW on the bridge of
the Jupiter II.
"Hey ATC I don't think-WHOA!" JSW's eye's bugged out seeing the huge mess
the bridge of the GALAXIUS was immersed in. "What happened?"
ATC frowned as he reached his chair. "The new parts for the Chronometer
went berserk."
JSW shook with barely contained laughter. "Looks like a soda machine blew
up."
ATC frowned some more. "Look left." He said and snapped his fingers.
"Wha?" JSW looked to his left.
"WHAM!!!!!!!!!"
JSW fell over, a throwing mallet implanted in his head. ATC struggled
into his chair and pressed a button. A moment later the bridge was free of
foam. JSW stood back up and looked at the screen.
"So, when are we now?" JSW said, podering how that mallet got on his ship.
"It doesn't seem like we went anywhere."
"Well." ATC said. "I checked the chronometer, it seems we've only jumped
five months forward in time."
"Looks like one heck of a party is going on down there."
ATC looked up at the screen. "That's not just any party. That, is a royal
engagment party."
JSW frowned. "If we only moved five months forward in time... we saw the
princess before we left, which means..."
"Yes." ATC said. "That's the Princess' royal engagment party. Which puts
us on the very date of the final battle."
JSW thought for a moment. "Wouldn't that put us right in the line of
fire?"
"Most likely." ATC said as if it didn't matter. Just then the bridge
doors opened and in walked a guy with a cat on his shoulder. ATC turned around.
"Clawz, Pyro, you finaly got here, we're already into chapter two."
Pyro, the guy with a backpack, spoke up. "The Authors had a bit of trouble
locating us."
"Yeah." Said the cat. "It seems we were notified of this fic by mail,
which Pyro blew up for the seven hundredth time."
JSW, who was still onscreen, looked amazed at the guy with the backpack.
"Who are they?" He asked.
ATC turned back to the holographic screen. "These are two of my team, the
guy with the backpack is Pyro-Maniac. The cat is Clawz, he can turn into a
panther at will, so he's not as cute as he seems.
JSW had a real soft spot for cats, and it surfaced all at once.
"Awwwwww, how cute."
Like a flash, Clawz lept off Pyro's shoulder and morphed into a large
black panther. He growled at the screen.
JSW sweatdropped and stepped back, looking over to pyro.
"Sorry, I have a thing for cats. So why does Super mario looking guy here
get called Pyro-Maniac anyway?"
ATC went deadpan.
"He can identify any explosive on sight, wire a bomb before you can blink,
and carry any amount of explosives in his pack."
"But you said he was a maniac, and Clawz said he blew up the mailbox,
which means he... must... like... to...." JSW looked at Pyro on the screen.
"What is he doing?"
ATC turned around. "He's-" and saw Pyro wiring a 100 gigaton H bomb to his
chair.
"WHAM!!!!!"
Pyro fell over but recovered realy fast.
"Awww PLEASE! Just this once?!?!" He practacly begged.
ATC frowned. "You detonate that thing and there'll be no moon left for
ANYTHING to conquer."
JSW pailed.... in fact, he was splashed with white ink.
"Um.... What he said." He stated pointing to ATC.
ATC sighed. "Why, oh WHY did the authors put these guys in our fic?"
JSW, who recovered his normal color shrugged.
Pyro spoke up again. "Maybe you guys might need us for something."
"Like what?" JSW asked.
"Um... something, I'm sure the Authors will think some weird reason up."
Pyro replied.
JSW sweatdropped. "They havn't actualy done anything lately."
Admiral Tigerclaw looked at the fic. "You dar- ERHEM... YOU DARE TO
QUESTION OUR POWER?!?!?!?"
Jupiter Star Warrior joined in.
"HOW DARE HE!!!! TIGER, YOUR TURN."
JSW frowned... "Oh no... PLEASE not that!"
"YES THAT!" Admiral Tigerclaw said and pressed the smite button. JSW was
hit with a bolt of lightning.
"Itai..." JSW says before falling over, the crew of the Jupiter II stared
in "shock".
ATC frowned as JSW started to recover. "THAT, is why I never cross our
Authors."
"I'm begining to see what you mean." JSW said as he stood up. He noticed
a stray arc of electricity jump across his body and started playing with it.
"So... THIS is how I got my 'electrafying' personality." He grinned.
"SHOCKING, isn't it?" He was imedietly struck by another bolt of lightning.
"I don't think the Authors liked that joke." ATC said.
JSW twitched on the floor. "I... guess not....." HE got back up. "Let's
take five for now... even with the jokes, our Authors must be running out of
conversation matter." And they had said lightning never strikes the same place
twice... well this is two times they were proven wrong now.
"I think you should stop making our authors angry." ATC said as he opened
a book of Kanji crosswords.
"I'll keep that in mind." JSW twitched out, as a medic checked him over.
.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'
Back in the palace, the party was in full swing as several dancing couples
made their way around the floor to the sound of the orchestra. The whole fiasco
stopped when a bright flash burst in through the windows. The lead band man
looked out the window and nearly fainted at the sight, two huge objects floating
high over the palace.
"What the HELL is that?!" He asked, as the crowd flocked to the windows
like birds. For minutes everyone just stared untill the Queen herself came out
to see what all the commotion was about. She was quickly directed to one of the
windows. A moment later the Queen turned around to summon her senshi.
Fifteen minutes later several Sailor Senshi and two lunar cats were on the
terrace staring up at the ships as Sailor Murcury worked her computer to figure
it out.
"You think it's from the dark Kingdom?" A very suspicious Luna asked.
"Well, whatever field it has protecting it is also blocking my scans."
Mercury said. "But it's very strong, and it's not a negative charge." She typed
a few more commands in her computer. "It doesn't seem to be doing anything but
just sitting there... but I am picking up chronometric energy distortions... as
if the whole thing came through a rip in time. That would explain why it's just
sitting there. Whoever is on it must be confused."
//////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\////////////////\\\\\\\\\
Back on the GALAXIUS...
"Hey JSW." ATC said. "Here's something... 28 down, a Japanese term
meaning stupid or dumb. That would be the word BAKA right?"
JSW thought for a moment on his end of the captains ready room com line.
"I would think so."
"That would mean two syllables, ne? So... what are the symbols for ba and
ka?" ATC asked, looking up at the moniter.
"Don't look at me." JSW said. "You're the one who likes those things."
ATC was about to reply when the Tactical officer of the GALAXIUS entered
the room.
"Sir, I think you should come see this." He said.
"Alright." ATC said. "JSW, I'll switch us over to the main com."
"Okay." JSW said and ATC walked out of the room onto the main bridge area.
"Hmmm...." ATC thought as he entered the bridge. "Number five down... A
word meaning teacher.... Six english letters, two syllables."
JSW's head popped up on a Holographic screen right in front of ATC.
"Sensei?" He said.
"DAH!!!"
"WHAM!!!!"
JSW sweatdropped at the sight over the screen. ATC blinked and stared at the
consol, that was behind the holographic screen, he had smashed.
"I don't know what you just broke." JSW said. "But I'm not paying for it."
ATC frowned and walked over to his TAC station as he filled out his
crossword.
"So what is it you wanted me to see?" He asked.
Meanwhile, JSW looked over at his sleeping TAC officer.
"Why do I get the bums, weirdos, lazies, and overall useless crew?"
The TAC officer motioned ATC closer to his consol.
"There is a low level negitive energy wave building in the earth's upper
atmosphere.
JSW went over to his TAC consol and knocked the officer out of the chair and
started hitting buttons.
"An energy wave?" ATC asked. "Explain."
JSW frowned at his display.
"This can't be correct." JSW said as he ran a quick system dianostic.
"It's energy polarity has dropped tremendously, it's far into the negitive
range." The TAC officer brought up an energy reading for ATC to view.
"This is strange." ATC said. "But it could be..."
Back on the moon the senshi were still staring up at GALAXIUS...
"That's odd." Came Sailor Mercury, who was still observing her scans. "I'm
picking up strange energy from beyond the ships.
Artemis looked up at the Senshi.
"What could it be?"
"Well." Mercury began. "It's massive and it's emmiting energy far into
the negitive range almost as if- ...As if it were the Dark Kingdom.
"WHAT?!?!?!?!" Came everyone's cry.
"SOUND THE ALERT!!!" Luna yelled. "We're about to be ATTACKED!"
On GALAXIUS, ATC was watching the strange energy with interest... it would
cost it alot of money.
"I don't like this." ATC stated matter of factly. "Yellow alert."
"ATC." JSW said in a worried tone. "I think we're in big doggie doo doo."
"HUH?" ATC said looking at his shoes. "I don't see any-
"That's now what I meant." JSW said.
"SIR!" Came the TAC officer's yell. "The energy wave has SPIKED!"
"WHAT?!" ATC shouted, and looked at the data. A moment later he started
barking out orders. "RED ALERT! BATTLESTATIONS! GET ALL SYSTEMS READY! WE'RE
GOING TO ENGAGE! JSW GET YOUR SHIP CLOAKED AND OUT OF THE WAY!"
"ALLRIGHT PEOPLE!" JSW shouted as he woke up the officers on the bridge.
"Let's get movin' and give the GALAXIUS room!"
ATC frowned at the darkness moving toward them from earth.
"JSW, you're still HERE! Why aren't you gone?" ATC asked. "Helm, give us
bearing mark one seven seven."
"I'm working on it!" JSW said. "Helm, evasive manuevers and cloak us."
"May our skill and power lead us to victory." ATC said.
"May I just keep my lunch" JSW's helm officer replied."
Back on the moon, the whole palace was on alert and watching the skies intently,
but none as much as Mercury.
"They're moving!" She shouted.
"What? How? What are they doing?" Voiced Venus.
"They seem to be turning to-WHOA!!!"
"WHAT! WHAT!?" Jupiter shouted, in a nearly paniced state.
"The big ships energy output has shot off the scale, the shields have gone
super strong, and whatever passes for weapons has just come on.
"Well don't just sit there, DO SOMETHING!" Luna shouted.
"We can't do ANYTHING from here." Mercury replied.
"What will we do?" Luna said sadly as she watched the ships high up in
orbit turn to face a powerful foe.
Back on GALAXIUS, the situation had gone from stressful, to downright mental
breakdown. ATC seemed to be the only one on the bridge not standing in a five
inch deep puddle of sweat.
"Stay cloaked JSW." ATC said. "Don't give yourself away."
"Should we stay cloaked?" Asked the Jupiter II's TAC officer
"Do as he says." JSW said.
Out in space, the dark energy paused in its advance as it spotted GALAXIUS
sitting in space. It sensed a POWERFUL force it had never experienced before.
ATC: I didn't breathe on it... did I?
JSW: We'll talk about your breath later.
"What is it doing?" JSW whispered over the com.
"It's confused." ATC said. "It has no idea what we are."
"Figures." JSW muttered.
"Head around for a flanking manuever." ATC said.
"Helm, do it." JSW ordered the helm officer.
"Sir." Said the tactical officer. "Energy buildup coming from entity."
JSW saw the buildup as the Jupiter II started it's flanking manuever.
"Shields direct full forward." ATC ordered.
"Um... ATC?" JSW asked. "Shouldn't I decloak for maximum shield effect?
Especialy if we engage?"
"Don't worry." ATC soothed. "You won't be attacked while you're cloaked,
and I have a fix on your position through the COM system so you won't be hit by
stray shots."
"SIR!!!" Shouted the TAC officer. "ENERGY BLAST! IMPACT IN 2-"
The bridge shuddered violently at the impact, JSW watched the hit from his ship
and freaked out.
"ATC! ATC!!! COME IN!!!!" He shouted.
"I'm still here." ATC said. "TAC, report."
"Shields dropped by 5 percent."
ATC grinned. "Let's say we have a little slugfest with this entity." His
face turned serious. "Open fire."
Like a clap of thunder the GALAXIUS fell upon the entity laying enough
energy and plasma into the entity that it could light up Tokyo for five years.
Wheather or not that's from burning buildings or electricity we don't know.
"Jupiter II, attack." ATC ordered.
"Decloak and open fire." JSW ordered.
The Jupiter II decloaked behind the entity and started pouring it's smaller yet
still impressive arsenal into it.
Meanwhile... but why does while have to be so mean anyway? Why can't it
be nicewhile? I'm sure people are quite tired of while being mean.
ATC: ~_~;;;
JSW: The Author's wandering again... can't they EVER stay on task?
AUTHOR TIGERCLAW: YOU DOUBT US???!
"ZZZZZZZZZAP!!!"
JSW: *fizzle* I-TAI.....
ATC: That's what happens remember?
JSW: I-wish the Author's weren't so sensitive....
ATC: MOVING ALONG....
JSW: Yeah, I want to get out of this rapid dialog mode...
Meanwhile, on the moon the Senshi were staring up at the rather large
pyrotechnics display that was lighting up the lunar sky better then any of the
fireworks earlier.
Mercury looked at her display again, frowning at what she was seeing. "Oh,
Kami! There's another ship!"
"What!?" Jupiter exclaimed, peering over Mercury's shoulder. The rest of
the Senshi peered over Mercury's shoulder, shocked at what they saw.
Mars looked at the sky to see what the matter was.
"The other ship is opening fire, too!" Mercury exclaimed. She then
gasped as she frowned at her display. "The dark energy is going toward the
moon!! It's ignoring the two ships!"
Back at the two ships, JSW sat in his chair, watching the battle. The
Jupiter II shook under stress as the dark energy fired another shot at them.
"Report!" JSW commanded.
"Shields are holding. 95%!" the tactical officer replied. "Sir, it's
away from Earth!"
"GALAXIUS, IT'S AWAY FROM EARTH!! USE THE STARCLUSTER CANNON!!!!"
ATCs voice responded "I see it! Get back so you won't get hit too!"
Back in space, the Jupiter II gave the Galaxius room to fire the
Starcluster cannon. A big ball of energy gathered at the front of the Galaxius
as the cannon powered up. Then, in one big flash, the cannon fired and the dark
energy disappeared after the bright light dissipated.
JSW: Rather anticlimatic for a BIG GUN.
ATC: All right! Just in time for the Fourth of July!
JSW: Um, it's not that time in History yet...
On the moon, Mercury and the rest of the Senshi gaped at space after the
explosion from the bigger ship. "They..."
"Won."
Mercury looked at her computer display and dropped it. "Um, we have a
problem..."
Elsewhere on the moon, an army of soldiers approached the castle. They
crushed the different statues of the Kingdom and started terrorizing the
inhabitants of the moon. The Dark Kingdom's soldiers came at full force,
destroying anything in their path. The alarm was sounded and the inhabitants of
the moon immediately were called to action.
Statues and lives were being destroyed as JSW watched helplessly from his
ship. He gritted his teeth and cracked his knuckles. With the being destroyed
and off of space, JSWs crew went back to their normal naps. JSW had to bat away
an annoying sweatdrop as he looked at ATC through the viewscreen. By the look
in ATCs eyes, he too saw what was going on and frowned.
"Well, looks like we get to kick ass and chew bubble gum," ATC said.
"But, I'm all out of bubble gum," JSW finished as he grabbed his gunblade,
glasses, and trench coat.
ATC grinned and showed him a pack of bubble gum. "Funny, I have plenty."
JSW sighed and said "Meet me on the moon and bring Trident because it
looks like I'll have to use my 'secret weapon'."
Moments later, JSW materialized on the moon and looked around him. He
raised an eyebrow as magic raced towards him. He held up his left hand and
Reflect surrounded him, sending the magic back to the caster. Putting down his
hand he commented "Tough battle" as ATC materialized next to him. ATC was wearing
that dark combat outfit of dark sunglasses, long, black trench coat, and a sleazy
smile only ATC can muster.
Suddenly, a Youma jumped in front of JSW. JSW responded by withdrawing
his gunblade and started hacking away at the Youma, who slashed at JSW with its
sword-arm attachment.
ATC, calmly looking at the battle before him, spoke up, "Looks bad. Shall
we give 'em a real fight?"
JSW, still fighting the youma, responded, "If you want!" He finished off
the youma with a devastating blow that knocked its head off. JSW had to sweatdrop at the Author after the ocean scene
replaced him wiping off the Youma-crap off of him.
ATC: What's wrong?
JSW: I dunno… I could've sworn that I was surrounded by ocean and tides
and such.
ATC: That wasn't your imagination… That was for real.
JSW: Can we PLEASE get out of this rapid dialogue mode, PLEASE?
So, with that settled, another youma appeared next to ATC, who waved at it,
saying, "Hi there!"
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAgh!!!!!" responded the
Youma.
Meanwhile, another Youma stepped next to JSW, who tapped him on the
shoulder. "What?" JSW responded to the Youma, turning to face it. "YIKES!
FIRE 3!!" The Youma burned to toast as ATC cast Oblivion on the rest of the
Youma, which pretty much takes care of Youma 3 – 250.
JSW: I didn't know the Authors kept track of the Youma…
A-JSW: IT IS VERY HARD, LET ME TELL YOU THAT.
JSW: *shrugs* Not my problem.
A-JSW: YOU WANT IT YOUR PROBLEM!?
JSW: O.O N-NOT REALLY!!
A-JSW: GOOD!
ATC: *butting in* Can we get out of Rapid Dialogue mode and get on with the
plot?
JSW and A-JSW: THERE'S A PLOT??
ATC: -_-;;;;
Meanwhile, more Youma snuck up to the group and one actually hammered a
blow to JSW.
"OOOOOUUUUUUUUUCH!!!!" JSW cried as ATC tapped the shoulder of the Youma.
The youma faced ATC.
"Who the
!@%@%$#@^!@%$#@$^@%#@^!@%$#^!@^%$#^@#&@%^!@%$^!@^@$^%#$&@#%#$&@#$^%#!%#$&@#%$&@#
$^%#$&@^%^&@^#&@^#$^@&^%@$^@^#^#@$^$%!^%@^@#^$#&*^%%*@#^%$#!#%#@!@%#@^#@%$$#@^!%
$#%^ are you?" the Youma asked.
"SORRY 'BOUT THAT. THE YOUMA SAID SOME NASTY THINGS THERE. I HAD TO EDIT
IT OUT," Author JSW explains to the sweatdropping JSW.
"Oh, right. I knew that," JSW, getting up from his recent clobber,
responded.
"I sometimes wish I knew who you're talking to, JSW," ATC commented,
yoinking the Youma out of existence with a cast of Paradox without a second thought.
"And I sometimes wonder how the hell you do that," JSW replies as he stabbed
a Youma behind him.
Suddenly, an overhead voice, who pushed the Author out of the way for one
moment, reverberated around the entire battlefield, crying "MORTAL KOMBAT!!!"
JSW and ATC recovered from the sudden reverberating voice and took their
battle stances to face the youma who were stupidly heading their way.
"CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY!" the voice said as ATC and JSW started doing some
crazy, wild, and downright amazing Martial Arts moves (that will leave the Author
bankrupt if it goes into more detail) against the youma. A lot of youma went
down. Plain and simple.
"I choose to be with Sailor Jupiter at this point," JSW commented, whacking
another Youma.
ATC sweatdroped at this and kicked a Youma where the sun don't shine.
Needless to say, this Youma would be in pain for the rest of it's life... which was about five seconds before the Katana of Kickass severed its life span.
"They are not here," ATC responded to JSWs comment.
"Exactly my point," JSW said as he punched the living daylights out of a
Youma. It fell to the ground and added another body to the ever growing pile of
Youma bodies. "That's why I want to be with her. I don't want to be here."
"We are a long ways away from Palaceland," ATC informed, tripping a Youma.
"What?!" JSW dodged a punch meant for his pea-sized brain of his.
("HEY!!!!" *Zaps the Author* "DON'T CALL ME A PEA BRAIN!!!!!"
AUTHOR: x.X;;; Itaii…)
"Then what are we doing here?! We should be where
there is no fighting going on!!" JSW whined.
"FLAWLESS VICTORY!" the voice exclaimed as JSW and ATC leapt over the Youma
to a part of the battlefield that was not yet swarmed by the swarming youma.
"DAMN!" JSW cried, casting Ultima on a group of Youma. They explode in a
powerful, blinding blast of green light.
ATC slashed at another Youma, "What?"
"We're still too far from the Palace!" JSW said, taking a small break, for
there is now a twelve-yard gap between him and the next set of Youma.
"Hmm… Take cover. I'm summoning Oblivion," ATC calmly stated. JSW
started to run for cover but quickly stopped in his tracks.
"WHAT!?! SHIT!!" JSW ducked in a trench as ATC summoned Oblivion, causing
a flash of light that was emitted from his palm.
In a strange reverb, ATC yelled "I SUMMON-ON-ON OBLIVION-ON-ON-ON!!" THEN
HE TOO TOOK COVER.
As the Author recovered from using the Caps Lock too much, Oblivion is
summoned and a HUGE, BIG-ASS EXPLOSION MAKES A TERRIBLE, SICKENING, DEAFENING
BOOM.
JSW: *cowering* I. HATE. BOOMS!!!
Meanwhile, back at the Palace…
The Sailor Senshi felt, watched, and, in fact, heard a large explosion
rumble off in the distance toward the scene of the battle. Sailor Jupiter, who
was pacing as the explosion rattled through the palace violently.
"WHAT ON THE MOON WAS THAT!?!" Sailor Jupiter exclaimed, recovering from
her recent fall on her cute butt.
SJ: WHAT A HENTAI!!
A-JSW: What!? You DO have a cute butt!!
SJ: GRR!! WHY I OUGHT TO SLICE YOU INTO FETTUCINNI!!!
A-JSW: Um… heh… Sorry!! ^.^
After the Author and Sailor Jupiter got done with their bickering, Mars
responded with "Um, that was an explosion of some kind."
Sailor Mercury, looking at her computer display terminal, responded with a
more accurate, and very confusing answer: "An explosion rating around a
condensed Giga-ton hyperatomic shockwave that should have vaporized the Earth's
only natural satellite into smithereens."
Everyone in the room, including the Queen, looked at Mercury and
facefaulted. Sailor Venus recovered from her facefault first and asked "Huh!?!"
Sailor Mercury rolled her eyes and provided a better response for the less
feeble mind, like this Author. "Basically, an explosion that should have
destroyed the moon just nuked an area of five miles, but didn't destroy the
moon."
JSWs face popped up in a scene push-over box and exclaimed "I HATE
BOOMS!!!"
Sailor Jupiter pushed JSWs window out of the way and asked "Why didn't it
destroy the moon?" She wiped the back of her hand across her forehead, for the
strain of JSWs Window was a hard push, that, and JSW was pushing back, trying to
get a kiss from Sailor Jupiter. Finally, Sailor Jupiter had to slap JSW, which,
strangely, made him cry.
Sailor Mercury responded with "It was contained by an unknown force."
ATCs own little pop-up window appeared and exclaimed "The Authors (~_~),"
then disappeared.
"And what of these damn window push-over things? They are starting to
annoy me!" Mars growled, glaring at the spot where ATC disappeared and lit
her thumb up like a match.
Mercury just looked at Mars and gave a look that said "I don't know."
"So, is the threat over?" Venus asked as a youma-army battle cry
reverberated in the distance. Everyone in the room swallowed hard as the scene
cut to…
JSW and ATC's position…
Dodging a spell cast by a youma, which caused a loud explosion, JSW cried,
"I hate BOOMS!!! And now there are more youma to deal with!!"
"I don't think we got them all," a fried ATC said, "But I think they
noticed us."
Casting his Ultima spell against the youma troops, JSW yelled, "YOU
THINK!?!?!"
Suddenly, JSW and ATC were surrounded by a flock of sword-wielding youma,
points of the swords right at JSW and ATC, who backed up some. "Yeah, they know
we are here," ATC calmly commented, withdrawing his Katana of Kickass.
"Right, okay…" JSW said, taking a deep breath to calm him down and
withdrawing his Gunblade. "…Let's kick ass!"
"I have a better plan," ATC said as-a-matter-of-factly.
"You have a plan," JSW sighed in disappointment, "WHAT ABOUT MY KICKASS
PLAN?! *sigh* What is your plan?"
Explaining his plan, ATC, well, explained his plan. "We are faced with an
army five times that of a collosseum. We are both low on magic power…"
JSW raised an eyebrow and checked his Magic Points. "Damn! So I see."
"…So, I propose that I slice a hole in that wall and we RUN!"
Looking around him curiously, JSW observed, "What wall…?"
A-JSW: OOPS!! *places a wall where ATC indicated in the story*.
JSW: Damn authors!
A-JSW: *hits the SMITE button above JSWs name.*
JSW: O.O YEOUCH!!
ATC, who was toting JSW when JSW got smited by Author-Jupiter Star
Warrior, commanded, "Do not insult the authors when I'm towing you."
"Well, at least you got smitten, too," JSW observed as ATC made his way to
the wall the Authors so conveniently placed for our "heros".
"You wanta go back and fight off the youma yourself?"
"O.o;; Heh... no."
More youma surround ATC and JSW as they backed into the wall, swords held high
and ready to strike anyone, anything, and something, if they moved. JSW started
panicking as the radius between him and the next youma closed.
Breaking in tears, JSW cried "GREEEEEEAT! NOW WE'RE SURROUNDED BY MAN-
EATING MONSTERS WHO WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO GET OUR FLESH!!" JSW lifted up his
palms and yelled "ULTIMA BEAM!" The beam struck the advancing Youma army, but
more youma replaced the ones who got destroyed.
JSW's face turned red as he started yelling at ATC. "YOU SEE WHERE WE'RE
AT NOW?! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! I CAN'T HOLD THESE MONSTERS OFF WITH ULTIMA AND
ULTIMA BEAM FOREVER! I'M ALMOST OUT OF MAGIC POINTS AND HAVE NO WAY TO RESTORE
THEM WITHOUT LEAVING THE FIGHT, AND YOU VERY WELL KNOW THAT I CANNOT LEAVE THE
FINE SAILOR JUPITER HELPLESS TO FEND ALL THESE UGLY MONSTERS ALL ON HER OWN!!!"
As JSW continued to rant endlessly, ATC calmly lead JSW into a shadow to
safety. Of course, JSW didn't notice this and continued to yell, bitch, moan,
and complain.
JSW: IF WE GET OUT OF THIS ALIVE, I'LL WRING YOUR SORRY LITTLE NECK AND
FORGET THAT THIS EVER HAPPENED! THEN, I'M GOING TO TAKE SAILOR JUPITER TO THE
BAHAMAS WHERE I'LL NEVER HEAR OF CRAZY LITTLE STUNTS THAT ALMOST GETS ME KILLED
JUST THINKING ABOUT THEM!!
ATC: JSW.
JSW: THIS WAS A VERY BAD IDEA THAT YOU HAVE GOTTEN US INTO! WE ARE NOW
MORE THAN DEAD; WE'RE DEAD MEAT! DID YOU SEE ALL THE SALIVA AND DROOL AND SPIT
FROM ALL THOSE YOUMAS!? THEY WERE PRACTICALLY READY TO DIGEST US AND EAT US!!
ATC: JSW!
JSW: THIS IS THE END OF THE WORLD AS I KNOW IT! I NOW KNOW SAILOR PLUTO
WILL NEVER RESTORE ME FOR FEAR I'LL DO THIS AGAIN AND AGAIN, AND I WANT TO MARRY
JUPITER, THE HOTTEST BABE IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE, AND NOW THAT'LL NEVER HAPPEN!!
AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!!!
ATC: *yelling at the top of his lungs* JSW! WE ARE SAFE IN THE CASTLE!!!
JSW: HOW ON EARTH I ENDED UP IN THIS MESS, I'LL NEVER KNOW…… *record
player screeching to a halt*. We're what?
Finally out of that hideously long Rapid Dialog mode, and FINALLY after
all the yelling JSW did, JSW looked around him and surveyed the area around him.
"So we are," he said, embarrassed.
ATC calmly nodded and said, "And we have company."
The Sailor Senshi stood and stared at the odd two-some.
A-JSW: OH, THAT SO DID NOT SOUND RIGHT!
A-ATC: Baka hentai!
JSW looked behind him and sweatdropped. "Heh, heh, heh… Hi…?" As his
eyes panned to beet red Sailor Jupiter, he started to stare at her. His eyes filled up
with hearts and he sighed "Such a hottie!"
Suddenly, ATCs mallet slammed JSW on the head as Sailor Jupiter blinked in
surprise and blushed.
"We have much more important things to worry about. Like how much my
stocks will crash if the moon gets blown to bits," ATC grumbled.
"But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, she IS a hottie," JSW stammered.
Sailor Jupiter blushed all the more.
"True," ATC said, "they're ALL cute, but what good is a cute corpse?"
JSW frowned. "She's not cute... she's a TOTAL BABE!"
"Whatever," ATC said, "we have work to do so quit drooling."
JSW pouted and watched ATC pull a small cube out of his pocket. "What's that?" he asked.
"Plot device." ATC said, then pressed the button on the cube and tossed it to the floor. "Stand back."
Everyone stood back and a moment later the hall was filled with a technologicaly advanced tactical operations and monitering center that only can be rivaled by the whole of NORAD.
ATC: NORAD in a pocket... what a concept.
JSW: O.o It has full situation monitering and communication systems.... you sure you didn't just compress the REAL NORAD into a subspace cube?
ATC: Now why would I do a thing like that?
JSW: ... Because you CAN????
ATC: You're learning. BACK TO THE STORY!
The senshi stared in shock at the room's trasformation as ATC walked over to a console and started tapping keys.
"GALAXIUS, give me a feed from the main sensors." ATC said. The screen lit up and a moment later the whole room was alight with data moving in and out of the system.
"Looks like a REALY big youma army is making it's way here... I give them thirty minutes."
JSW started to forwn. "Um... don't we want to leave the timeline alone and let them get killed like they're supposed to?"
Every person in the room gasped at the statement.
"Now look what you did." ATC said. "You just let them know what the future is... BAD JSW!"
"I don't think it matters." JSW said. "We've already screwed up time as it is."
ATC frowned. "Well, we didn't KNOW we were going to attack until we did. Now they knew they were supposed to die..." ATC looked at his watch... "ten minutes ago."
"Excuse me..." Sailor Mercury said. "Isn't there still a big army on it's way?"
"Oh yeah." ATC said. "We can just have GALAXIUS nuke em."
"What about civilians?" JSW asked.
"Oop, forgot." ATC said, sweatdropping. "I guess we have to handle them the old way. GALAXIUS, I need BOB, PYRO, and Clawz down here STAT."
"Oh NOT them!" JSW said exhaustedly. "Their walking demolitionists.... on second thought... their perfect for attacking monsters."
"But of course." ATC said... and the three requested persons materialized in the room in a shower of sparkles.
"Ech!" Clawz said. "It'll take HOURS to get these sparkles out of my fur. Who's idea was it to use glitter in the speacial effects?"
"You can blame the Authors." JSW said... and suddenly part of the ceiling fell on his head.
"Alright guys," ATC said. "We need a battle plan. How will we defeat a massive youma army without trashing the landscape with an orbital bombardment?"
"Well, you DO have that Wing Zero Custom from the GUNDAMVERSE in the Hanger."
"The WHAT!?" JSW said.
"The Wing Zero Custom." ATC said.
"A big mech robot." Pyro filled in.
JSW frowned. "Those make big booms don't they?"
ATC nodded.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
Everyone stared.
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"JSW..."
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"Shutup JSW"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"JSW?!"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
"Would someone SEDATE him please?"
"...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-'SLAM!!!!'-OOOOoooo'THUD!'....."
Jupiter rubbed her knuckles.
JSW managed to twitch out, "Does this mean we're going on that date friday night?" and passed out.
"Thank you," ATC said. "Now, where was I?"
Everyone stared blankly.
"You were in the palace." Said a grinning JSW.
ATC looked at him and did his famous 'cocked an eyebrow' look. "Aren't you supposed to be unconcious?"
"I get up to fast for my own good." JSW sulked, and suddenly shot over to Jupiter. "So how about that date?"
Jupiter sweatdropped. "I don't even know you."
"My name's Jupiter Star Warior, but you can call me JSW for short!" He grinned, sticking his hand out.
"You know." ATC said. "I'd hate to interupt you two and JSW's endless flirting with Jupiter, but unless you two want to have your date in the AFTERLIFE, I suggest you give me a hand."
JSW simply pulled a fake hand out of his pocket and hurled it at ACT where it smacked on his face. To everyone's astonishment, it wasn't a fake hand as ATC almost freaked to find out... but Thing from the Addams Family. Thing shook his... her... it's fist at JSW for throwing it.
"Jupiter, do me a favor and use a thunderbolt on him." ATC said.
JSW grinned. "Ah, but you forgot, I'm immune to electricity since my favorite senshi is Jupiter." Jupiter blushed.
"Right then..." ATC said as he walked over to the queen. "May I?" And snatched the silver crystal.
"SILVER COSMIC MEGA BLAST OF EXTREME VOLUME!!!!!"
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I-hate-BOOM...." JSW coughed out and fell over.
"Thank you." ATC said as he handed the crystal back to the Queen.
"You're mean." JSW said getting up.
ATC shook his head. "We have twenty minutes to intercept the army."
"I'm not helping you in any way-" And JSW launched into a long over explained rant that burned away ten minutes of their time limit.
Clawz: In ten seconds? What? How?
ATC: Don't ask.
ATC frowned at JSW's long explanation. "Ami, care to translate?"
Sailor mercury just stared blankly.
Omitting the fact that ATC used Mercury's real name, weather or not it was a secret at the time... a loud noise interupted the stagnant conversation... to be precise, it was HELLMARCH from command and conquer.
"Where the HELL is hellmarch coming from?" JSW asked.
"Well, omitting HELL since they took the day off... it's not me." ATC replied.
JSW walked to a balcony and looked way out across the area and spotted the sorce.
"DAMN!!!! Their carrying a BIG-ASSED STEREO!
ATC looked out the window gravely. (NO! NOT GRAVY YOU IDIOT!) "I guess we better get crackin', I'll beem up to GALAXIUS and get the Wing Zero Custom and JSW, you... JSW?"
JSW was buisily cracking walnuts with a nutcracker.
"JSW," ATC said. "You're getting PATHETIC. Quit with the stupidity or I'm throwing you to the Youma."
JSW pouted. "Oh all riiiigh." and tossed away the nutcracker. "So, what do we do first?"
"Well..." ATC said looking at his shoulder... where Thing was tapping away. "We get him/her/it out of our story."
"Why?" JSW asked. "It's only a hand."
Thing preceded to give JSW the 'finger'.
"Oh that was just not nice." JSW said.
"I know," ATC said. "How bout the Author's be nice and get Thing back to it's universe."
Thing dissappeared in a little white flash.
ATC: Q said he was doing special effects for this chapter.
JSW: I hope he doesn't decide to have a little "FUN."
ATC: Don't be silly, The Authors would smite him.
JSW: Oh...
"Let's rock and roll!" ATC said, and beamed back to the GALAXIUS. JSW, whipped out his Gunblade and checked how sharp it was.
"Shal we go HARM some Youma now?" He said. The Senshi agreed and they all took off out the hall entrance to go maim, crush, injure, kill, and destroy some youma.
JSW: Um, yeah, too much time with a thesaurus....
"CRACK!"
JSW: Shutting up...
------________--------_______-----
Queen Beryl smiled as her army reaped destruction upon the moon she hated so much, fires burned everywhere and the screaming was music to her ears. But one thing worried her, her master Queen Mettalia had dissappeared all at once after alot of bright flashes overhead... she could no longer feel Mettalia anywhere near. But it didn't matter, so far she had met little resistance, and what little of it there was she had destroyed.... other then some odd resistance her youma could get nowhere near a little while back... but it just up and vanished. Her youma had begged her to let them bring along some infernal contraption that made alot of noise... and it was playing some kind of music she never heard before, but the youma liked it, and they were even marching in step to its beat. Suddenly, several bright flashes and a crack of thunder caught her attention. She grinned, the Senshi had finaly retaliated. This was going to be fun, suddenly a much larger blast eradicated a ton of youma in front of her... her mood darkened further. A person was going to need headlights to see past it...
_-_-_-_-_-_
"ULTIMA BEAM!" JSW shouted nuking several Youma into something resembling a blue powder. The Senshi had used their attacks first and got a few youma, causing a bunch of them to clump up and charge... only to be Ultimaed by JSW. Listening to Hellmarch play over and over again was starting to get on his last nerve, and he let the youma know... by firing a shot from his gunblade at the box, blowing it to bits. Thanks to this, the youma not only lost their marching step, but it also enraged them... They roared a mighty battle roar and charged.
"DOUBLE TIME!" JSW shouted and fired Ultima after Ultima, stopping only to hack any youma that got to close with his Gunblade. The Senshi, having the youma filtered down to a minute portion, were having it easy. But JSW was doing all the work. And he was REALY going berserk... With a massive battle cry, BOB engaged the hoards in a rather insane display of stupidity... but the youma were to busy ducking the huge Katana he was weilding to notice. Clawz Simply snoozed nearby, and only got up to KILL any youma stupid enough to interupt his nap... Pryo was cackling with glee as he did what he did best, blow stuff up. And he loved every minute of it. The youma on the other hand, did not like being test pilots for his cruise missiles... which were never supposed to have pilots.
Sailor Mars launched a fireball and fried a youma and made her way to JSW.
"Isn't your friend supposed to be bringing some mega weapon or something?!?" She yelled over the roar of battle.
"I don't know what's takling him so long!" JSW shouted back. "But he normaly gets around to some heavy hammering when he wants to... ULTIMA BEAM!!!!!"
And of course things were doing what they normaly do for ATC...
.....,,,,,,.........,,,,,,,,.......
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'REPOSSESSED?!?!?!?!'"
Going all strait to hell...
ATC had just gotten to the hanger to find out that the Wing Zero Custom had been reposessed.
"A Mr. Yui came and said he needed it for something, and then up and offed with it." The officer said. "But you will be pleased to know that your Pouncer M2 Custom is finished."
"Did they get the new specifications for the Zero System Mark II working propperly?" ATC asked.
"It seemed to work fine in the test simulations. No one went insane and try to nuke everything."
ATC smiled, for once. "That's good enough for me!"
ATC hopped into the Pouncer M2 custom, we'll just call it pouncer for simplicity, and took off out of the hanger with an over-dramatic camera effect, which is going to bring the budget for chapter two all the way to the edge...
Back at the battle...
...........
"Ultima... BEEEEEAM!!!!!!" And JSW nuked another group. "They just keep comming!"
So far they had held off the tide of battle, but they were getting tired and the youma were still coming. JSW's gunblade was only useful as a blade now since he ran out of ammo, and the Senshi were fast getting more youma to deal with. Bob ran by chasing about fifty or so terrified youma, but that's Bob, Clawz was still trying to nap, and Pyro was almost down to WOMD (Weapons of Mass Destruction.), and ATC had said to avoid using the H-Bombs.
Beryl laughed from an overturned collumn as she watched the fighters fight a losing battle. She fired a few dark blasts which JSW blocked and irritated him. A youma finaly got the upper hand and was about to slice him into JSW pieces...
JSW: I DON' WANNA DIIIIIIEEEE!!!!!!
...When A giant metal foot stepped on it and crushed it like a cockroach.
JSW: I'm ALIVE!!!
Beryl ceased her laughter and stared at the huge mech.
"You call for backup?" The voice stated, sounding like Robocop.
"It's about time ATC!" JSW shouted. "We're actualy starting to get tired here! We almost had to send in the stunt doubles!"
"What stunt doubles?" Mars asked.
JSW: The ones we can't afford thanks to the Camera stunt.
ATC: Be quiet.
"Sorry." ATC said. "Let's end this... BERYL!" He Pointed at Beryl. "Send your best warrior to face me! If I win, you go away. If I lose, we leave and you can blast this palace all you want!"
Beryl took a second to think. "Very well." She said, and sent her warrior. "Shadow! GO!"
"YESSSS MASSTER!" A dark voice hissed, and out of the shadows a giant shadow... thingie made of squiggly lines and two red eyes appeared.
JSW: Our budget is so bad that we have three year olds drawing for us?!?!?!?
ATC: Don't worry, we'll get to the end of the fic... and our paycheck.
All ground combat ceased as the two giant combatants faced off. Shiney metal against... well, thick black squigly lines. ATC pulled out a beam saber and ignited it. The Shadow created a shadow sword... also of squigly lines. ATC turned off all outside com links, and put White Reflection on the Stereo system, which also blasted it across the battlefield... deafening anyone too close. Without warning both combatants charged, colliding with force and going into a melee mode where a whole buncha moves to fast to be propperly described happened, somehow they both found an opening and hit each other, and lept back. ATC crushed about three hundred youma as he did so, and the shadow just kinda float/stood there. ATC decided to change tactics. The shadow prepped for another charge, ATC crouched. The youma rushed forward, making the longest rushing yards in history, and with a flap of the metal wings, ATC lept into the air and took to the sky. The shadow turned and flew after him. The met in mid air and a massive airial melee followed, once again very fast. ATC prepared for a mighty hack with his saber, when it went out.
"Ugh..." ATC said. "Shoulda gotten Energizer."
The shadow, thinking the battle now belonged to it. Gave a triumphant roar and chased after ATC, but ATC had one last trick. He blasted away fast and reached over his shoulder, where he pulled a long oversized double barrel shotgun-like object. JSW, on the ground grinned at the site and put on some shades while handing the senshi Some. Beryl frowned not knowing what was happening.
ATC and the pouncer were flying backwards at an alarming rate, now spread eagle with a double buster cannon aimed at the fast approaching shadow. ATC pressed the "NUKE EM BAD" button. The creature saw the barrels of the gun glow yellow as it charged. ATC grinned as a whine filled the cockpit. The shadow made to dodge, and the Double Buster Rifle fired it's payload. A devastating blast ripped from the cannon to the shadow in under a second, and the shadow shrieked as it was ripped apart. As the blast faded, Beryl looked on stunned. Her greatest creature, thwarted by a... well, she had no clue what that was, but it was big.
"ATTACK!" She yelled, and the youma went back to attacking.
"I DON'T 'THINK!' SO!" ATC shouted and rotated to a better fireing position.
"GET DOWN!" JSW shouted as he saw it happening, and pulled everyone to the ground.
The double cannons fired again... and half the youma army were blown to dust. Everything went deathly quiet.
"Want to rephrase that Beryl?" ATC said.
The youma army paniced and fled the battlefield at a rapid pace. Beryl was now fuming.
"GET BACK HERE! YOU LITTLE COWARDS! GET BACK HERE AND FIGHT LIKE-" Beryl was cut off as the Pouncer landed on her, flattening her. The only thing left were her feet sticking out from under a foot. ATC hopped out of the pouncer and walked over to them.
"Well, you lose Beryl." He said.
The feet curled up and out of sight.
"Did I mention that I HATE BOOM!!!?" JSW said getting up and looking around. "Other then that, we WON. PARTY TIME!!!!!!!"
"Indeed..." ATC smiled. And they all went back to the Palace, several stunned Senshi in tow. JSW ended up falling back to Jupiter and walking with her while ATC continued walking by himself with a menacing look.
````````````~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`````````````
Twenty minutes later found the party back in full swing, even more so after that victory. JSW danced with Jupiter, JSW in a trance himself while ATC was going wild with the drums. ATC was starting to collect quite a croud at his drum work... Things were good.
Suddenly the palace door swung wide with a creak. Everyone looked up to see what was wrong. ATC and JSW stopped.
Sailor Pluto was standing at the door, a disapproving frown plastered all over her face.
"Ho boy..." ATC said quietly to JSW, who had slunk up next to him. *This can't be very good. She only shows up at important times."
JSW couldn't agree more.
"Where are they?" Pluto said. "Two guys, where are they?"
The croud parted and gave her clear view of ATC and JSW.
"Methinks we're in trouble." ATC said.
"THEY!" Pluto pointed at them. "Are messing up time. They should not be here."
The mood of the party went from happy, to graveyard. And it was all directed at ATC and JSW.
"Eh... heh." JSW sweatdropped. "We didn't mean to... realy-" Bob, Clawz, and Pyro shimmered blue and faded out across the room, no one noticed.
"Any time GALAXIUS" ATC barely mumbled, everyone heard that.
"Stop them!" Pluto shouted, too late, ATC and JSW shimmered with blue sparkles and faded away.
"DAMN!" Pluto said, and sat in a chair. Mars brought her some punch. "Almost had them that time. Now how will I fix THIS mess?
)))))))))))))))))))))))))
"That was a close one." JSW said over the com link to GALAXIUS.
"No kidding." ATC replied as he entered the bridge with his Kanji Crossword. "She almost trapped us against people we wouldn't DARE fight against.
"Ah, well... maybe we can get out of this time and find somewhere where she won't walk in and try to kill us." JSW said. He watched ATC flop down in his command chair. Something was off... "Um, ATC? wasn't there something on your chair before we left?"
Pyro entered the bridge, looking around. "Has anyone seen my 'Megakill' bomb? It's a one hundred gigaton H-bomb."
ATC and JSW looked at each other, thinking the same thing.
"AAWWWW SHIT!" They both said.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((
Pluto's ears perked up, there was an odd beeping noise coming from somewhere, she got up and looked around. This caught the Qeen's attention.
"What are you looking for?" She asked walking next to her. Pluto pulled something out from behind a curtain, a large metal box with a small one attached to it, it had numbers.
Seven...
Six...
Five...
Four...
Pluto was having a VERY bad day.
Two...
One...
---------------
A brilliant flash lit up the bridges of both GALAXIUS and Jupiter II. JSW plastered humself to the viewscreen of his ship shouting, "MAKOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-CHAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"HOLD ON!!!" ATC shouted. And then the shockwave hit, shaking GALAXIUS badly and knocking the the Jupiter II around. After it passed JSW and his crew got up off the floor. And he frowned.
"So much for saving the moon kingdom." ATC said.
"Well, I guess it was never meant to be." JSW said. "So when to next?"
"Anytime but now." ATC said, and punched in the Chronosphere. The GALAXIUS and Jupiter II dissappeared in a flash.
Pluto stood up from where she was crouching and looking at what when it went off. The dust that was all that was left of her uniform floated to the ground. Those tho... were starting to get on her nerves. She developed a rather violent eyebrow twitch and turned around... Summoning up her Timekey, she opened up a portal back to her time gate and went to get some new cloaths... and she just had the blasted uniform dry-cleaned too...
ATC: Ah... our paychecks... WHAT?!?!?!? We OWE 'THEM!?!?!?!
JSW: But, what, why, how? ARRRRGH!!!!!
ATC: Someone is going to die...
DISCLAIMER: We don't own them, we're not worth your time and money, get lost.
