A/N: I know I said this was going to be the last chapter...and it is, but there's also going to be a short afterward because I'm not thrilled with this chappy. So, from this point...an afterward and an alternate ending, and then I'll really be done. On a side note, does everyone else have the same problem I do? Whenever I have an update, fanfiction.net becomes inexplicably unavailable (every time, never fails)...it's really irritating.
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return" - Moulin Rouge
Chapter 26: How Wonderful Life Is
Seifer dug his fingers into the ground, the warmth of the spring sunshine having filled the dark soil. Autumn had been winding down into a dismal winter when he'd arrived back at the orphanage where he'd grown up. It hadn't been the happy homecoming that he'd imagined. True enough, he was returning to a place where he'd once been able to find the life he wanted to live. But he'd planned the trip back to Centra assuming that Quistis would accompany him. When she'd come to his temporary dorm room so many months ago, his bubble had been burst. She'd made it obvious before leaving that she had no intention of accompanying him. SeeD was more important to her.
Seeing her walk out of his room and his life in his mind's eye, Seifer put a little more zest into his chore. The garden stretched out barren before him, half of it now sewn with seeds. Edea, before departing that morning had dropped the packages of vegetable and flower seeds into Seifer's lap along with instructions to have them planted before she returned that evening. So, his shirt sleeves rolled up, he'd spent a good half of the day in the dirt.
Early on, Faber had joined him. After a few hours, however, he'd lost interest in digging rows and small holes.
Seifer stood up, stretching out a ache in the lower part of his back, as he reached the end of a row of carrots. There were still little half grown plants waiting at the side of the garden in black plastic containers, but he needed to check on the children. He'd become familiar with all of them in the first winter month of his stay. Centra had a relatively mild climate, but that winter had brought a little bit of snow and quite a bit of rain that kept all of the children inside.
The sun was high in the sky above him, beating down warmly upon his now bare shoulders. The day was humid, sticky. Sweat was collecting across his skin, and he wanted nothing more than to take a long shower. Pushing the waiting plants out of his mind, he looked around for the familiar dark head.
"Faber!" The little, dark haired boy looked up from a sandcastle he was building on the beach. "I'm going to hop in the shower! Make sure no one gets into any trouble!"
"Sure!" his voice came echoing back off the rocks.
Try as he might, Seifer just couldn't reclaim the bliss of the two days he'd spent in Centra with Quistis Trepe. As he walked to the bathroom, he wondered if she was happy back in Garden. He didn't want to drag her away from the place that she called home. In his euphoria following the outcome of the trial, he'd taken it for granted that she would simply follow him back. They loved each other, didn't they? They'd start their own life together, away from SeeD and away from Garden. He knew as well as she did that they could never be happy together in Balamb, there were too many haunting memories from the past, things he would like to forget.
So, he left without her.
Frowning, Seifer stepped into the hot spray of the shower and let it pound down on him. This was supposed to be happiness. He had a home, he had Faber. What else did he need?
He needed Quistis.
That realization had been a difficult one for him to deal with. It had come to him one lonely winter morning as he nursed a cup of hot chocolate. Faber had been sitting across from him in a gray, fuzzy sweater. He hadn't been in as bright of spirits as usual, able to sense Seifer's unease. Surprisingly enough, it had been Faber who'd given him the key to his unhappiness.
"You should ask Quistis to come live with us," Faber had offered over his cereal. "You're more fun with her."
He closed his eyes, his muscles quivering under the hot spray of the shower. He'd been more complete with her, and he missed her terribly. Still, the way he felt about her hadn't been enough to bring her away from her beloved career. He supposed he couldn't expect her to give up everything for him, but he wanted nothing more than to start fresh with her.
By the time he got out of the shower, Seifer had worked himself into an uncharacteristic depression. Why, he wondered, was happiness so persistently difficult to get a hold of? There were two choices available to him. He could stay with Quistis in Garden and be miserable in an environment that hated him. On the other hand, there was the option that he had chosen. He came back to Centra, leaving Quistis behind to the life she'd chosen.
Wrapping a towel around his waist, he wandered blindly back to his room. Edea would be back soon, and he had to replace his expression of sadness with a mask of contentment. He didn't want her to know how simply miserable he felt at times. His new life was supposed to be wonderful, and sometimes it helped him to pretend that it was.
He redressed quickly, shaking water out of his hair. He'd finally gotten around to getting a haircut, and his overall appearance was fairly close to the one he'd had at eighteen. Somehow, he couldn't rid himself of the almost half-starved, corded look he'd acquired. It was like a constant reminder of the metamorphosis of his wretched life.
Outside, the garden was still waiting for him, and Faber's castle had gained two more floors and a moat. He had an incredible talent at building things. The few days during the winter in which they'd had snow, Seifer had gone outside to help Faber build a snow man, and in the end had been more of a hindrance to Faber's attempt than a help. So, he'd sat back and watched as Faber attempted to fix some of the damage that Seifer had done to the icy little man.
"How's it going?" Seifer asked, walking up to Faber.
"Can't get my tower strait," he replied, casting a critical frown on the castle.
"Looks strait to me," Seifer shrugged. "You're too hard on yourself."
Faber curled one lip up, a slight amount of disgust at his inability to construct a perfect castle apparent in his expression. However, his countenance bent suddenly in the other direction as his dark gaze softened and a sly little grin crossed his lips.
"What?" That look always made Seifer suspicious.
"Matron's back," he said simply, shrugging his small shoulders.
Seifer attempted to school his expression before turning around to follow Faber's line of sight. Matron, indeed, had returned from wherever she gone that morning. However, it obviously wasn't Edea's dark and exotic form that Faber had been grinning at. Instead, it was the golden haired woman trailing behind her.
Quistis.
After months away from her, she looked even more beautiful than he'd remembered. In the spring sun, her hair glimmered delightfully. She had on a sundress that fell about her knees and a floppy hat, a pair of sunglasses perched on her nose. The dress was a gauzy white and rode the sea breeze easily, whipping about her long legs. Watching her, he couldn't breathe.
Edea neared, and Quistis went to stand strategically behind her, blocking much of Seifer's view. The sand behind them was marked with a set of two small footprints. Quistis wasn't wearing her usual boots, but instead of a pair of feminine sandals.
"Did you get the garden planted?" Edea asked, adverting his attention and not even bothering to tell him why Quistis was with her.
"Uh...sort of..." he stammered, leaning to one side in order to see over her shoulder to Quistis.
"Did you at least get all the seeds planted?" she asked, placing one hand on her hip and leaning with him into his view of the blonde.
"Yeah..." he nodded, wishing the good natured women would go away.
For days and days he had been fighting the urge to go back to Quistis. Centra just wasn't home without her, and as much as he hated leaving Faber, he was finding it difficult to get along without her. Now, as suddenly as his feelings for her seemed to have ignited, she'd come back into his life. Her presence could have been fleeting, or even a product of his overused imagination. But, even if she was a dream, it was one he wanted to indulge.
"Good!" Edea chirped, moving past him and taking Faber's hand. "Come inside and help me start dinner, Faber. We'll have to make something special tonight since we have company." She smiled down at him, pulling slightly at his arm. Faber reluctantly went with her, finally leaving Quistis and Seifer alone.
"Hi..." she murmured, digging her toe into the sand.
"Hi," he replied daftly. Then, after a long pause, he licked his lips. "What are you doing here?"
"I've...come to live here," she shrugged.
Seifer choked back surprise. She wasn't just visiting, and she wasn't some temporary vision.. She'd come to stay. Had she come for him?
"Oh? Why's that?" he managed to ask. Quistis looked embarrassed, her eyes focusing on her feet.
"I just wasn't...comfortable at Garden anymore," she shrugged. "I mean, I tried to settle back in, but it just didn't do it for me anymore, you know?" It was the restlessness that she'd told him had driven her away from Garden in the first place. Oddly enough, both times she'd been driven toward him. Although, he guessed this time was a little different than the last. He wasn't a criminal anymore.
"You quit SeeD?" he raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah..." she shrugged. "I...uh...I was thinking that maybe..." She took a big breath, licking her lips nervously. "I was thinking you and I could...give being together another shot."
Seifer had to pinch himself just to be sure he wasn't dreaming. It was all too good to be true. Quistis had come to him, she'd given up what had been the center of her life to start clean with him. It was everything he'd been hoping for through the winter. It was, as Faber had pointed out, the very key to Seifer's happiness.
"You want to be with me?" he asked.
"Well...yeah."
"But, when I left..." he shook his head. "You seemed so determined to stay back in Garden. You said that it was your home and you couldn't imagine leaving."
"I thought that it was," she admitted. "But, the longer I stayed there, the more unhappy I got. I thought maybe if I found you, that we could sort of start over."
"I thought you didn't want to be with me," he blushed. "I thought you would come with me when I left."
"I thought you were leaving me," she shook her head.
They both stood for a moment, staring at each other and realizing that they had wasted the past few months because of a very simple misunderstanding. Would she have come if he asked her to? He wasn't sure. Maybe she'd needed those months to come to him. With time, he would have gone back to her anyway.
"I missed you," he admitted, embarrassed at how thrilled he was to have her back.
"I missed you, too." She took a step toward him. "I kept thinking of how easy it was to be here with you. I kept wishing that I could have it back."
Seifer let out a long breath. This was it. This was his chance to make the world into the perfect place that he so wanted it to be. Quistis was standing before him, her heart on her sleeve, and she was asking him to start a new life with her. He wanted to scream and throw his arms up toward the sky. This was the very essence of heaven. This was...perfection.
Leaning forward, he cupped her chin in his hand and kissed her.
The world changed pace, clicked into place, and she lifted her arms to wrap them around him. There was no more fighting it, and Seifer abandoned himself to the feel of her tucked in his arms. He was drawn into the kiss, his consciousness twisted and interweaved with hers. It was like coming home, like finding Eden in his backyard. He loved her. As much as he had struggled against it and tried to convince himself that he could live without her, he was finally able to simply give into the feelings that were overwhelming him. He loved her...simply loved her.
"Quistis..." he murmured against her lips.
"I love you, Seifer," she interrupted him. "Hyne, I don't know when or why...but I love you."
"I..." he closed his eyes. "I love you, too."
Quistis rested her forehead against his, a smile across her lips. It was such an easy thing, but it had taken Seifer years to discover, and as happiness flooded him, he found the dying fire within him sparking back to life. It flickered, then rose to a dull roar. The world, and Seifer within it, came suddenly back to life like that wild flame. He was fallen no longer, he was complete...and he owed everything to her. This woman who loved him, who'd given her everything for him.
"Let's start fresh, Quistis."
"Okay," she smiled, trailing a hand down his back.
He let his head roll to one side to come to rest against her shoulder. The life he'd been dreaming of was finally within his grasp. This was the way things were meant to be.
Life and love, Seifer reflected, were strange but wonderful things.
