H*O*T* P*O*T*A*T*O!

Disclaimer: I don't own FF7 or the Hot Potato game. Well actually I DO own a hot potato game. But that's besides the point……..

Warning: There is a bit of character bashing directed towards Cloud. Don't take offense all you Cloud lovers out there! I like Cloud too. Just so you know. *Nods*



It had been an extremely boring week for Cloud. Even after he bought the villa in Costa Del Sol there was still nothing to do. I mean, c'mon, you can only go swimming so much before it gets old. The weather had been nice all week, except for today.

Cloud: I'm sooooooo bored.

Barret: No…. I thought you just said that the other twenty times because you were kidding.

Cloud: *blinks*

Vincent: *staring out the window* Oh sweet darkness envelop the blithe sun and turn this vacation into a living he—

(everyone looks at him)

Vincent: I mean… I hate the rain too! *smiles nervously*

Red XII: Hey look what I found! *comes out of the kitchen kicking something*

Cloud: What's that? *picks it up* HOT! *drops it*

Vincent: It's a potato oh smart one.

Red XIII: Not just any potato, but a HOT potato.

Tifa: And……..what's so great about a hot potato?

Red XIII: There's a game you can play with it. You pass it around and whoever gets stuck with it last loses.

Cloud: *thinks* But then won't the person who has it last get burnt?

Red XIII: Well, yeah, but that's besides the point.

Cloud: But—

Barret: LET'S PLAY ^^!

(group gets in a circle)

Red XIII: Ready? *starts passing the potato* Hot potato, hot potato, who has the hot potato…

Tifa: *gives it to Vincent*

Vincent: *kicks it to Barret*

Red XIII: ..if you have the hot potato you…..

Barret: *chunks it at cloud, knocking him out*

Red XII: ….are out.

Barret: ^^ that was fun! Let's play again! Wasn't that fun Cloud?

Cloud: *unconcious*

Barret: You're just being a sore loser.

Red XIII: It's someone else's turn to say the chant in their own way.

Vincent: I'll do it in spelling bee style.

Red XIII: Okay.

Vincent: Hot. H-O-T. Hot. Potato. P-O-T-A-T-O. Potato. Hot. H-O-T. Hot. Potato.

P-O-T-A-T-O. Potato.

3 hours later

Vincent: Are. A-R-E. Are. Out. O-U-T. Out.

Tifa: Uhhhh, Vincent?

Vincent: What?

Tifa: You never passed the potato so , um, you're out.

Vincent: Hey! You never told me I had to pass the potato!

Red XIII: Yes we did.

*Awkward silence*

Barret: Let's play again ^^!

Sephiroth: I brought a potato gun, can I play??

(everyone stares at him)

Tifa: Didn't we kill you?

Sephiroth: umm…….*gets nervous* Let's Play! *starts shooting ppl with the potato gun as he sings* Potato gun, potato gun, I got a potato gun. If you don't have a potato gun, you are dead!

*Looks around to see that everyone is dead*

Sephiroth: YAY! I win ^^! *Walks off*

Cloud: *wakes up* …..guys. Hey guys….AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! THEY'RE ALL DEAD!!!!!

Vincent: *gets up* Actually I've BEEN dead.

Cloud: *blinks*

Red XIII: Yea, well. It's been fun being dead and all but, I have to go.

Tifa: I have an appointment at the salon.

Barret: Me, too.

(everyone stops)

Barret: What?! A man can't get a pedicure? What is the world coming to?

(everyone leaves)

Cloud: Hey, you. Yea, you reading this fic. Look, do these pants make my butt look big?

(readers start to leave)

Cloud: No, really! Do they make my butt look big?!?

(lights turn off)

Cloud: Oh great. Hey. Anyone? Someone? This isn't funny--- *runs into the wall*



Msanogi: Well that's my fic. Poor cloud. Being subject to the evil hot potato of death.

Cloud: POTATOES ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!

Msanogi: …….oooooookay. Well, R/R thx! ^_^x