The One Where Joey Loves Rachel...

By Serenely

Okay, this is actually a slight remake of TOW Joey tells Rachel. All is basically the same as the episode, except for the end when they're at the restaurant. This is basically for JnR fans, and is more dramatized than the actual genre of "FRIENDS". I'm focusing on the conflict and the plot of the story, not the actual personalities of the characters. However, I'm trying my best to make my characterizations as similar to the real show as possible.

Disclaimer: I don't own ANY of these characters...but how cool would it be if I did?

This time the restaurant wasn't as crowded as it was the night Joey and Rachel went on their "date." Perhaps because it was a Tuesday night, and the people of Manhattan usually valued the serenity of their own homes after a long day of work. The waiter came and went: politely taking their drink orders, their entrée requests, and finally handing them their check. Although Joey had seemed his sweet self throughout the evening, he hadn't said much more than a few words. Rachel had been the one trying to carry on the conversation. She had sensed an unfamiliar nervousness about him, but she didn't quite know what to make of it.

It was a little after 9 when a slow, simple ballad began to play in the background. Casually, couples rose from their tables and the ladies were escorted to the dance floor by their men. The fleeting looks of enlightenment that were painted on the swaying pairs made Rachel's heart twinge longingly. She couldn't remember the last time she slow danced. Joey watched her carefully, debating whether or not he should ask her to dance. He waited for her to say something, trying to test his confidence.

As Rachel's eyes wandered over the dance floor, she noticed an older couple, both lovingly enveloped in each other. It was amazing to her. "God, that is so beautiful and romantic," she whispered as she watched the husband kiss his wife's hand. "After so many years, they're still in love..." Joey knew it was now or never.

"Umm, hey Rach...would you...like to dance?" asked Joey shyly.

"Dance? Me? Wow...umm...am I allowed to dance?" she asked glancing down to signify her tummy.

"Well, it's not like you're gonna be doing anything straining..." he responded. "And besides, you have me to lean on..." Rachel smiled. He convinced her, not that she really needed to be. He got up from his seat, and offered her his hand. Rachel took it kindly, and Joey led her to the dance floor. Once there, he delicately took her right hand with his left. He hesitated awkwardly before putting his right arm around her. He hoped to God she didn't feel him trembling. A new song began and he led her in a gentle sway...

This is my last dance with you

This is my only chance to do

All I can do

To let you know that what I feel for you is real

This is the last chance for us

This is the moment that I just cannot let end

Before I know that there's a chance

We're more than friends

"Mmm...sweetie, this is so nice..." Rachel murmured by Joey's ear. Her breath sent tickling impressions throughout his body. The scent of her hair was cathartic. Joey was in heaven.

"Mm-hmm," was the only response that could escape his mouth without giving away how much he was enjoying this.

So don't let go

Make it last all night

This is my last chance to make you mine.

I hid my feelings so deep

I kept my dreams of you and me

Somewhere inside

Although I pray that you would see it in my eyes

Joey suddenly noticed that the words of this song were incredibly ironic. He tried not to let it bother him. But was this a sign? The heavenly moment was ruined and then quickly replaced with a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach. Should he tell her? Shouldn't he tell her? What to do?

But this is my last chance to say

What's in my heart before you fade out of my life

And never understand the way I feel inside

So hold me close

Coz it feels so right

This is my last chance to make you mine...

When the song finally ended, he didn't want to let Rachel go. His entire body tensed up. Rachel noticed, "Honey, why are you so tense?"

He shook his head like it was nothing and abruptly let his hand fall from her waist. "Uh, nothing...I just remembered something that I forgot to do earlier..." he couldn't think of a decent excuse.

"Oh, well, was it important?" she asked worriedly. Joey led her back to the table. He helped Rachel back down into her seat.

"Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal..."his voice trailed off. "Hey Rach, I'll be right back. I'm gonna go to the restroom," Joey said, without looking at her. The tone of his voice sounded so unnatural, Rachel knew something was up.

"Sure honey," she said, smiling at him sweetly in hopes to ease whatever seemed to be bothering him. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to work. Joey left the table abruptly. "What is the matter with him," she questioned under her breath.

Joey didn't go to the restroom. He looked for their waiter, paid for the bill, and asked him graciously if it would be okay for them to occupy the table for a little while longer. Joey explained he had something important to discuss with his dinner guest, and he didn't want it to be intervened. He hadn't done it during the meal, fearing that they would be interrupted at the wrong time. The waiter didn't mind the least, especially since it was a slow night for business, and Joey had been more than generous in tipping him. Joey thanked him, and briefly returned back to the table.

"Okay Joey I can't take this anymore...what's goin' on with you?" Rachel asked concernedly. "What was with all of the silence and one-worded responses during dinner?" She looked at Joey, studying his face determined to find the answer.

He ignored her words completely. "So Rach, how was your day today?" He asked, hoping she wouldn't hear the crack in his voice. She eyed him suspiciously, then let out a sigh, but went along with him anyway.

"It was alright. Work wasn't as hectic as it had been now that the Valentine's Day promotions are over. We're basically just gathering fresh ideas for our spring line. I had lunch with Monica and I did a little window shopping," she said simply. "How about yours?"

He said the following very rushed, "Uh, well...I only had to shoot three scenes today. I was on the set for maybe four hours, so it wasn't really a big deal. They're introducing a new character to play my nephew. He's a cool kid...VERY talented. Oh, and Chandler came by today and we watched the Knicks game on TV...that's basically it besides me being in love with you," Joey slipped those last words out breezily, but it was also accidental. The moment he realized, his eyes widened and he prayed Rachel didn't hear. She seemed to have not.

She acknowledged everything he said, piece by piece, as she casually took a sip of water and spoke, "That's good to hear swee-" Sudden gushes of realization almost made her choke as she swallowed her water. She forced the last part of the word out, "-tie..." and sat shocked. She couldn't have heard right, could she? "I'm sorry, what did you say?" she slowly asked. Joey then knew she had heard. The expression on his face clarified Rachel's question.

"Damn it..." Joey mumbled to himself frustrated. Rachel sat speechlessly stunned. She didn't know what to say, or think, or do.

"Honey, are you...I mean, do you....Joey?" She could see how difficult a time he was having at explaining this. "Joey...it's me. You can talk to me..." Rachel said softly.

"Rach, I swear...I-I didn't want it to be this way. You gotta believe me..." Joey said dejectedly. He looked down to control his tears. He couldn't bear to look weak in front of Rachel, especially since he knew the pregnancy had made her so sensitive.

"Oh, Joey..." Rachel wanted to cry. Partly because her hormones were acting up again, but mostly because she could feel Joey's heart was breaking. She still didn't know how to react. "Joey I...I don't know what to say..." Rachel responded truthfully.

"Rach, no-no pressure, okay? I-I don't really expect you to say anything. I didn't mean for it to come out the way it did." Joey tried to keep his composure.

"Joey you're my, I mean we're...best friends..." she couldn't hold it in anymore. She felt warm streams coming down her cheeks. Joey couldn't handle this. To be in love with her was one thing, but to make her cry was a whole different story.

"Rach...sssshhh. It's okay. Really." He pleaded, trying to make his voice as convincing as possible. He came down on his knees next to her chair and embraced her as she cried on his shoulders. "Come on...there's no need to cry...forget what I said, okay? It was silly."

Rachel almost got angry, "Silly? Joey, don't put yourself down..." She tried to compose herself by sitting up straight, smoothing out her hair, and wiping her face with a napkin. She nonchalantly looked around the restaurant and noticed people were watching her cry from their tables. "Joey, let's get out of here..." she sadly whispered to him. He nodded his head, and helped her up. They left the restaurant calmly, without speaking another word.

In the cab, they didn't say much to each other. They didn't exactly know where to go from there. Occasionally, Joey would ask if Rachel was comfortable or if she needed anything, but that was the extent of their conversation. The ride home was basically a mixture of their individual clouded thoughts, one thought brought on by another.

About a half an hour later, after fighting the congestion of NYC traffic, Joey escorted Rachel back to her and Ross's apartment. They stood at the door, Joey clumsily fidgeting with his hands while nervously looking down, afraid to say the wrong thing, and afraid to say nothing.

"Umm, sweetie, thank you so much for dinner," was all Rachel could think of.

Joey smiled, "Don't mention it, Rach." Rachel noticed how very shy he had been this whole night. Being nervous, being shy...being in love. This was so unlike Joey...He broke her thoughts, "Well, you should get inside. It's breezy out here in the hallway and Ross might be waiting up." Rachel carefully watched him as he said this. Then it hit her... Ross.

"Jo-Joey, does umm...does Ross know about your-umm...?" stuttered Rachel.

"Yeah. I-I wasn't going to tell you, because, well you know...but then, but then Ross told me to, so I figured...actually, I don't know what I figured. All I knew is that I didn't want to keep this from you." he explained. He then tried to change his tone to a more playful one, "You know me and secrets..." Rachel understood completely.

"Oh Joey, this-this must've been really hard for you..." She walked up to Joey and put her arms underneath his and around his back. Her head leaned beneath his chin, upon his chest. Joey was too afraid to complete the hug with his own arms. If he held her, he knew it would be too hard to let go. He fought the fear, and took his chances anyway. "You need to know that no matter what, this doesn't change our friendship, okay Joe?" Rachel's muffled voice said against his shirt. "You're my best friend, and I love you."

"I know...I love you too, Rach." He forced out. But inside, he knew the kind of love she felt, was completely different from the kind he felt. Still, her friendship was one of the most important things in his life, and he was grateful that she wasn't taking it away. They gently let go of each other, and stepped back. Joey gave Rachel a subtle, sad wave, before turning around and walking away. Rachel entered her apartment. She found Ross sitting on the couch with his laptop next to him. A pile of term papers were on the coffee table. Rachel took off her jacket meaning to hang it on the rack. Not paying attention, she missed the rack completely and her coat fell to the floor. One look at Rachel, and Ross knew Joey told her.

"Rach...have you been crying?"

"Is it that obvious?" she said half-heartedly. Ross put his laptop on the coffee table to make room for Rachel. She dropped her keys in her purse, and then put her purse on the floor as she sat down. Watching her, part of Ross wanted to know what happened so badly, but another part of him didn't. Obviously he wanted to be there for Rachel, she was his best friend, the mother of his baby...and she also used to be the love of his life. She isn't anymore...but she was. And the last thing he wanted to feel was jealousy, especially if it concerened Joey. He chose his words carefully.

"So umm...what happened?" he asked quietly. Rachel looked him over skeptically. She knew Ross convinced Joey to tell her how he felt, but she didn't know why.

"Besides the part where Joey told me he was in love with me?" she asked frustrated.

"So, he told you, huh?" was all Ross could say. Rachel looked at him seriously. She sighed.

"Ross, what am I supposed to do? I mean, I mean it's Joey, you know? How, how am I supposed to handle this?" her voice trailed off. Ross could see how worried and upset she was over this.

"Well, I guess the first question you need to answer is...do you have feelings for him?" He fought to say these words.

"I, I don't know...I mean, I never looked at him that way before...he's my best friend..."

"Rachel...so were we..." Ross answered.

"Exactly...and we broke up...and got back together...and then broke up..." she was on the verge of tears. She put her hands to her face and let out a soft whimper. Heartbreak was a familiar term when it came to the issue of "them." He vividly remembered the emotional turmoil they both experienced during many of their heated arguments...He remembered the aching, the frustration, the rejection, and the uncertainty that came with anything that dealt with him and Rachel as a couple...He remembered the constant attempts at trying to make it work, and the inevitable misery that came when they failed. At that moment, more than anything, Ross wanted Rachel to stop hurting...and that's when he realized the unexpected. Ross said the next words easily, full of contentment, and full of understanding.

"And so were Monica and Chandler..." finished Ross softly. At those words, Rachel lifted her hands from her face and stared hard at him.

She repeated what he said, in the form of a question, 'Monica and Chandler...?' Ross wiped her face with his thumb, realizing what he wanted for her. It wasn't the fear of being jealous towards Joey that bothered him. It was the idea of finally letting Rachel go...and finally accepting closure. He smiled sincerely.

"Ross... our romantic history has been dragged on for nearly 8 years, even though we were only together for almost 2," whispered Rachel.

"But, look at us now Rach...we're okay," Ross convinced. Rachel looked at him closely.

"Are we?" she questioned. Ross nodded his head confidently. "Ross, we're having a baby together. We, we LIVE together...are you really okay with this?" she asked again.

"Rachel, you are one of the most important people in my life. It would be impossible to change that." Ross gathered his thoughts. "We tried being together... numerous times...and we failed. We both know it can't work....What we have, NOW, is so much more special...and if there's a chance that you could be happy, especially with someone as great as Joey, you NEED to take it. You deserve that. And I want this for you..." Rachel sat there, lost for words and even more confused. "If I wasn't okay with it, trust me, you'd know," he smiled encouragingly at Rachel.

"I-I still don't know where that leaves me..."

"Like I said, the first question you need answered is: do you have feelings for Joey?" Speechless, Rachel continued to stare at Ross, his last question replaying over and over in her mind. Does she? Could she? All she did know, was that she needed time.

Dun-dun-dun! To be continued...

P.S. This fic included the song, "Last Chance" by Allure.