Title: One More Kiss
Author: Rosgrana
Chapter: 2/4
Disclaimer: Everything recognisable is stolen, mostly from J.K. Rowling.
Spoilers: None
Feedback: Oh please! Praise will be gratefully welcomed; criticism will be carefully considered; flames will be ignored or mocked, depending on the recipient's mood at the time.
Archive: I'd be flattered, just let me know.
Author's Note: A thousand thanks to bondagechic, ClarKeRaVen, Bishounen Rapist, Gryphon and Cithara for the reviews. In obedience to your wishes, here's chapter 2!
Harry spent the next two days going through the motions of work while he wondered what he was going to do, then realised that he had no choice. If he didn't go to see Draco - *Malfoy*, he corrected himself - he'd always regret it; wonder what the other had wanted to say, curse himself for not having had the nerve to face him one last time.
Having made the decision, he quickly found an excuse to go: some information he would need to get from one of the captured Death Eaters who had turned informer for the Ministry; and arranged a visit to the prison.
He got his official business out of the way first, feeling that it was unlikely he'd be in much of a mood to discuss Voldemort's forces after talking to the person who'd left him to join them. All too soon he was standing outside the heavily warded cell that held Draco Malfoy, nodding politely as the guard said apologetically; "Can't give you long, I'm afraid, since officially I haven't even let you in here, but you can see him alone if you like. I'll be outside the door, but there's no need for anyone in the room - he's under too many charms and spells to do anything worse than insult people."
"He was always quite good at that," Harry said, a little shakily. "He could probably do some damage if he catches you with a nasty one."
The warder laughed, unlocked the door, and then Harry was on the other side of it, facing the figure sitting at a small table opposite him.
//He's changed,// thought Harry tritely. The boy - no, man - at the table hadn't looked up as he came in, still sat regarding his clasped hands which lay on the table before him, his head bowed. //He's too thin. He looks... damaged.// There were no signs of injury on the prisoner, but every line of his body spoke silently of weariness and pain.
"Hullo..." Harry wasn't sure what to call him, and let the greeting tail off.
Draco looked up at last. "Hullo, Harry. I didn't know if you'd come." His voice was unemotional, giving nothing away. //No change there.//
"I... well..." Harry struggled for words. "I came. Why did you ask me to?"
Draco looked straight at him for the first time, and said, "I wondered if you'd changed your mind." Harry thought he saw a spark of the old mockery in the shadowed eyes.
"Changed my mind...?" he asked, puzzled.
"About that kiss."
Harry's memory instantly supplied an all too vivid picture of the last time they'd spoken.
They had been sprawled together on the grass, away from curious eyes, in a little-used part of the Hogwarts grounds. Half a term away from leaving school for good, they took every moment they could snatch from lessons, quidditch and revising for their NEWTs to be together. No-one knew they were... seeing each other, although Ron and Hermione knew Harry was up to something (or some*one*, as Hermione had said, when stopping Ron from asking too many questions) and he thought they probably guessed more than they let on.
"It'll be weird," began Harry. "After this term. No more Hogwarts. No more Quidditch Cup, no more sneaking around at night avoiding Filch, no more messing about in the common rooms. I'm really going to miss being here."
"Well, I'm not. No more revision, no more exams, no more McGonagall lecturing us, no more rules, no more 'Don't do that.' I can't wait. Except..."
"Haven't you enjoyed school at all? I've been really happy here. I suppose it's because I've been so miserable at the Dursleys."
"No, it's because you're a great big sap."
Harry thumped Draco affectionately. "I can't believe you won't miss anything at all about Hogwarts. You're just acting cynical as usual."
"Quidditch, I suppose. Can't see myself doing much playing in future." Draco looked away, and muttered almost inaudibly, "And you."
"You what?"
"I said," he replied irritably, "that I'll miss you."
"Why?" Harry was sure he must be missing something.
"Because I... like you. A lot."
"I know. At least, I kind of assumed you do. Since we're... well. I mean, why will you miss me? It's not like we'll never see each other again after we leave, is it?"
Draco stared. "Yes, I should say it's pretty unlikely we're going to have anything to do with each other. Don't tell me that hadn't occurred to you? What did you think would happen?"
"Well... I just thought, we'd keep on... meeting up. I don't know what I'll be doing, exactly, and I know your father won't exactly be pleased, but... for heaven's sake, Draco, you're eighteen! You don't have to let your family choose who you get involved with!"
"My family! Do you think that's all there is against this?" His gesture indicated the two of them, sitting up now and glaring, hurt and puzzled in Harry's case, incredulous in Draco's. "In case you hadn't noticed, there's a war going on! And when we leave here, we'll be going straight into the middle of it! There's no possible way we can carry on together when we're on opposite sides of the biggest conflict in wizarding history! What planet have you been on?"
Harry was beginning to realise what Draco was saying... but that couldn't be true. Draco wouldn't - *couldn't* do that. Harry tried to convince himself he still didn't understand, but he knew he did. "You're going to join Voldemort." It wasn't really a question, but the desperate disbelief in his voice begged for a denial.
"Harry, I joined You-Know-Who just by being *born*! I don't have a choice in this, any more than you do. We're both stuck with the side we've got, and nothing's going to change that."
"That's bollocks, Draco." Harry's voice was shaking, with anger or distress he didn't know. "You had a choice. You still have. You're trying to justify the choice you've made by saying you couldn't help it, because you know it's the wrong one. I thought... I thought what was happening with us mattered to you. It did to me. I thought you cared about me!" He didn't care if it sounded pathetic; the best thing he could remember happening to him was not only falling apart, it seemed that it had never really existed.
"I do care. You know that! I hate it that we can't stay together, but I'd be insane to think there's any way for it to happen! All we can do is make the most of the time we've got."
Harry laughed humourlessly. "You're definitely insane if you think I'm having anything more to do with you! You seriously expect me to carry on sleeping with you until we leave, when I know that once term ends you'll take the Dark Mark and begin torturing and murdering the people I care about? When I know you'll kill me if you get the chance? That would really make you some points with Voldemort, if you killed me, wouldn't it? Pity you didn't think of it before you told me which side you're really on. You've had some good chances recently!"
"Harry... it's not... you don't understand."
"I bloody well do, you know!"
"So you're just going to walk away now?"
Harry was on his feet. "What do you think?"
"Harry..." Draco got up, looking at Harry with an unreadable expression. "One more kiss?"
Harry turned and walked away. They didn't speak again.
To be continued.
Author: Rosgrana
Chapter: 2/4
Disclaimer: Everything recognisable is stolen, mostly from J.K. Rowling.
Spoilers: None
Feedback: Oh please! Praise will be gratefully welcomed; criticism will be carefully considered; flames will be ignored or mocked, depending on the recipient's mood at the time.
Archive: I'd be flattered, just let me know.
Author's Note: A thousand thanks to bondagechic, ClarKeRaVen, Bishounen Rapist, Gryphon and Cithara for the reviews. In obedience to your wishes, here's chapter 2!
Harry spent the next two days going through the motions of work while he wondered what he was going to do, then realised that he had no choice. If he didn't go to see Draco - *Malfoy*, he corrected himself - he'd always regret it; wonder what the other had wanted to say, curse himself for not having had the nerve to face him one last time.
Having made the decision, he quickly found an excuse to go: some information he would need to get from one of the captured Death Eaters who had turned informer for the Ministry; and arranged a visit to the prison.
He got his official business out of the way first, feeling that it was unlikely he'd be in much of a mood to discuss Voldemort's forces after talking to the person who'd left him to join them. All too soon he was standing outside the heavily warded cell that held Draco Malfoy, nodding politely as the guard said apologetically; "Can't give you long, I'm afraid, since officially I haven't even let you in here, but you can see him alone if you like. I'll be outside the door, but there's no need for anyone in the room - he's under too many charms and spells to do anything worse than insult people."
"He was always quite good at that," Harry said, a little shakily. "He could probably do some damage if he catches you with a nasty one."
The warder laughed, unlocked the door, and then Harry was on the other side of it, facing the figure sitting at a small table opposite him.
//He's changed,// thought Harry tritely. The boy - no, man - at the table hadn't looked up as he came in, still sat regarding his clasped hands which lay on the table before him, his head bowed. //He's too thin. He looks... damaged.// There were no signs of injury on the prisoner, but every line of his body spoke silently of weariness and pain.
"Hullo..." Harry wasn't sure what to call him, and let the greeting tail off.
Draco looked up at last. "Hullo, Harry. I didn't know if you'd come." His voice was unemotional, giving nothing away. //No change there.//
"I... well..." Harry struggled for words. "I came. Why did you ask me to?"
Draco looked straight at him for the first time, and said, "I wondered if you'd changed your mind." Harry thought he saw a spark of the old mockery in the shadowed eyes.
"Changed my mind...?" he asked, puzzled.
"About that kiss."
Harry's memory instantly supplied an all too vivid picture of the last time they'd spoken.
They had been sprawled together on the grass, away from curious eyes, in a little-used part of the Hogwarts grounds. Half a term away from leaving school for good, they took every moment they could snatch from lessons, quidditch and revising for their NEWTs to be together. No-one knew they were... seeing each other, although Ron and Hermione knew Harry was up to something (or some*one*, as Hermione had said, when stopping Ron from asking too many questions) and he thought they probably guessed more than they let on.
"It'll be weird," began Harry. "After this term. No more Hogwarts. No more Quidditch Cup, no more sneaking around at night avoiding Filch, no more messing about in the common rooms. I'm really going to miss being here."
"Well, I'm not. No more revision, no more exams, no more McGonagall lecturing us, no more rules, no more 'Don't do that.' I can't wait. Except..."
"Haven't you enjoyed school at all? I've been really happy here. I suppose it's because I've been so miserable at the Dursleys."
"No, it's because you're a great big sap."
Harry thumped Draco affectionately. "I can't believe you won't miss anything at all about Hogwarts. You're just acting cynical as usual."
"Quidditch, I suppose. Can't see myself doing much playing in future." Draco looked away, and muttered almost inaudibly, "And you."
"You what?"
"I said," he replied irritably, "that I'll miss you."
"Why?" Harry was sure he must be missing something.
"Because I... like you. A lot."
"I know. At least, I kind of assumed you do. Since we're... well. I mean, why will you miss me? It's not like we'll never see each other again after we leave, is it?"
Draco stared. "Yes, I should say it's pretty unlikely we're going to have anything to do with each other. Don't tell me that hadn't occurred to you? What did you think would happen?"
"Well... I just thought, we'd keep on... meeting up. I don't know what I'll be doing, exactly, and I know your father won't exactly be pleased, but... for heaven's sake, Draco, you're eighteen! You don't have to let your family choose who you get involved with!"
"My family! Do you think that's all there is against this?" His gesture indicated the two of them, sitting up now and glaring, hurt and puzzled in Harry's case, incredulous in Draco's. "In case you hadn't noticed, there's a war going on! And when we leave here, we'll be going straight into the middle of it! There's no possible way we can carry on together when we're on opposite sides of the biggest conflict in wizarding history! What planet have you been on?"
Harry was beginning to realise what Draco was saying... but that couldn't be true. Draco wouldn't - *couldn't* do that. Harry tried to convince himself he still didn't understand, but he knew he did. "You're going to join Voldemort." It wasn't really a question, but the desperate disbelief in his voice begged for a denial.
"Harry, I joined You-Know-Who just by being *born*! I don't have a choice in this, any more than you do. We're both stuck with the side we've got, and nothing's going to change that."
"That's bollocks, Draco." Harry's voice was shaking, with anger or distress he didn't know. "You had a choice. You still have. You're trying to justify the choice you've made by saying you couldn't help it, because you know it's the wrong one. I thought... I thought what was happening with us mattered to you. It did to me. I thought you cared about me!" He didn't care if it sounded pathetic; the best thing he could remember happening to him was not only falling apart, it seemed that it had never really existed.
"I do care. You know that! I hate it that we can't stay together, but I'd be insane to think there's any way for it to happen! All we can do is make the most of the time we've got."
Harry laughed humourlessly. "You're definitely insane if you think I'm having anything more to do with you! You seriously expect me to carry on sleeping with you until we leave, when I know that once term ends you'll take the Dark Mark and begin torturing and murdering the people I care about? When I know you'll kill me if you get the chance? That would really make you some points with Voldemort, if you killed me, wouldn't it? Pity you didn't think of it before you told me which side you're really on. You've had some good chances recently!"
"Harry... it's not... you don't understand."
"I bloody well do, you know!"
"So you're just going to walk away now?"
Harry was on his feet. "What do you think?"
"Harry..." Draco got up, looking at Harry with an unreadable expression. "One more kiss?"
Harry turned and walked away. They didn't speak again.
To be continued.
