Nature Is Bad

Nature Is Bad

INT: Pleasantville High

Tommy is walking the halls to get to his locker.

Tommy's Inner Monologue

In a town full of werewolves and vampires, it's hard to expect a normal week in Pleasantville. In math class once, I calculated that something weird happens at least twice a week on average, coincidentally, that night I stopped a smog monster from eating Merton using a vacuum cleaner. For such a profoundly un-normal town, the past few days had been strangely quiet, which only made me wonder what was coming.

Merton runs into Tommy clutching a large book to his chest.

Merton: Tommy! I think I've found something.

Tommy: What do ya got?

Merton: I was reading one of my books of ancient prophecies when I came across this.

Merton hands the book to Tommy

Tommy: What is it?

Merton: It's about a werewolf who must stop a new evil to save the world.

Tommy looks closer.

Tommy: Wait a minute, this doesn't happen 'til 2010.

Merton: What? I was positive that said 2000.

Tommy: Nope…

Tommy hands him the book

Tommy: … See? 2010. Why are you reading these, you know they aren't really true.

Merton: It started after one of Becky's colorful variations of the term "freaker", I wanted to see if there were any death to the second born curses coming along in the near future.

Tommy: Any luck?

Merton: No. It seems all they wanted back than was the first born.

Tommy: So you coming to the Factory tonight?

Merton: Sure you don't want me to check up on this prophecy? It could be a typo.

Tommy: Merton, I have just as much concern as you but I'm starting to think that this just might be the first normal week we've had in a while, I say "lets enjoy it".

Merton: Okay… are you under a ghost car's spell cause I could…

Tommy: Just stop.

Merton: Fine, but when something does come and your not prepared, don't come cryin' to me.

Tommy: Are you coming tonight or not?

Merton: I'll see you there.

They walk off in different directions.

Tommy's Inner Monologue

I know Merton is just trying to stay ahead of things but sometimes he can go a little over board with the whole supernatural thing, I'm the one that turns into a wolf every full moon and you don't see me spazzing out. For once I think we can actually chock this one up as a normal, run of the mill week.

INT: Pleasantville High basement

A black haired man in a trench coat and sunglasses walks up to the spot where the Merton J. Dingle well was filled and puts a potted plant that looks like a small version of the one from Little Shop of Horrors on the ground. He then pulls out a small bottle from his inside pocket and pours the bright green contents in the plant's fly trap-like mouth. In a few seconds it grows and breaks through the floor and the ceiling. The dude takes off his glasses to reveal his eyes are a mushy dark green.

Theme Song

INT: The Factory

Tommy and Merton are sitting at a table talking but Merton is more interested in the girl sitting two tables over.

Tommy: Yeah, my dad was helping me out with my college applications but I'm just not sure…

Tommy notices that Merton isn't paying attention.

Tommy: Oh and I wolfed out last night too, but rather than stay in my room I thought "what the heck" so I went down stairs, interrupting my mom's dinner party, and said "hey, I'm the Pleasantville Werewolf".

Merton: Yeah that's great…what?

Tommy: Just seeing if you were thinking straight.

Merton: Oh.

Tommy: Why don't you go talk to her?

Merton: Okay, after all the bad experiences you've witnessed me have with the opposite sex, how can you in good conscience encourage me to continue?

Tommy: One, because you know you want to, and two, you need a girl who isn't interested in you for your youth or under the influence of some magic potion.

Merton: I guess you're right but…

Tommy: Go.

Merton: Fine.

Merton gets up and moves to the empty seat at the Girl's table.

Merton: Hi.

Girl: Hi.

Merton: Are you with anyone tonight.

Girl: I was supposed to be but I guess he had better things to do.

Merton: Well I don't, I mean if your lonely I could…I'm Merton.

Girl: Allison.

They shake hands

Merton: So do you go to Pleasantville High?

Allison: Yeah, I just moved here from California.

Merton: Really?

Allison: Have you ever been there?

Merton: No.

Allison: Oh.

pause

Merton: This could be a little more awkward.

Allison: Yeah.

EXT shot of the high school at night, a bike rider parks his bike in the front.

INT: The Halls

A kid is rushing down the empty hall to get something out of his locker. He opens his locker and the camera shows the wall behind it has vines crawling up inside of it. Before he can run, the vines shoot out of it and suck him in.

INT: The Basement

The entire basement is covered with vines and plants. Pods cover the walls and the flytrap is huge. One of the pods opens and the kid from the school walks out, his mushy green eyes form into human ones.

INT: The Factory

Merton and Allison's conversation continues after a fit of laughter from both of them.

Merton: So anyway, I'm climbing up this tree and my pants get caught on one of the limbs. Well, when my mom calls me in I try to get down and I fall.
Allison: Oh my god.

Merton: I know, for 2 hours I was hanging upside down from this tree by my pant leg.

Allison: That's terrible, I would've been so embarrassed.

Merton: Well I was five at the time so I didn't think much of it. Actually that was the only time in my life when I was confident enough to wear a sailor suit so it was all right.

More laughter

Allison: Oh crap I gotta go.

Merton hands her a slip of paper.

Merton: Here's my number.

Allison: I thought that I was supposed to give you mine?

Merton: Oh that'll work too.

Allison: I'll just see you around.

Merton: Bye.

Allison leaves and Tommy sits down at the table.

Tommy: So?

Merton: She's nice I guess.

Tommy: Oh come on, she was all over you.

Merton: I know, she was great wasn't she?

Tommy: You gonna see her again?

Merton: I hope.

Tommy: Well I gotta go too, I have an English assignment to do.

Merton: See ya later man.

Tommy: See ya.

Tommy leaves.

INT: The Basement

The trench coat dude is walking along the wall admiring the clones in their pods. He then addresses the plant as it fidgets impatiently.

Man: Don't worry, were not long for this world, but of course, neither are they.

He gestures toward a human head that has become part of the plant.

Man: Ahh, another one.

One of the pods opens up and Allison walks out.

Man: A new recruit?

The Allison clone just stares blankly.

INT: Tommy's House

Tommy walks in on Dean watching the blank screen on the TV.

Tommy: Hey Dean.

Dean: Huh, oh hi.

Tommy: What are you doing?

Dean: I'm doing an experiment, I found this little button on the remote this morning that said POWER, I pushed it and now I'm waiting to see what it does.

pause

Tommy: Well, good luck with that.

Dean: Yeah.

Tommy leaves Dean to his experiment.

INT: Pleasantville High


Certain kids are walking straighter than others but no one seems to notice. Merton and Tommy are at their lockers. Merton opens his locker and the camera shows the plant's POV as he throws his jacket over it.

Tommy: Well, it's Thursday and nothing weird has happened yet.

Merton: Okay you were right, nothings gonna happen.

Tommy: Hey isn't that…

Merton: Allison!

Allison turns around remembering that that is her name, and walks stiffly to Merton.

Allison: Hello.

Merton: Hey.

She stares blankly.

Merton: Its Merton remember?

Allison: Yes, Merton.

Merton: So where are you goin'

Allison: Class.

Merton: Which one?

Allison: Lunch.

Merton: Yeah, that's my favorite class too, so do you want to go to the bronze with me tonight?

Allison: No.

Merton: Why not?

Allison: I've got something to do.

The bell rings.

Merton: There's the bell, I guess you better go.

Allison: Yes.

Allison leaves. Merton turns to Tommy confused.

Merton: Did she seem a little odd to you?

Tommy gives him an annoyed look.

Merton: No really, she was all stolid and lifeless.

Tommy: I'm sure she's just tired or something.

Merton: Maybe.

Tommy: Look, just calm down and come with me to the Factory.

Merton: Well it's closed now Tommy.

Tommy: I'll see ya later.

They part ways, Merton walks into the camera and turns off screen, there is a blond kid hunched up next to a locker that was listening in on their conversation.

INT: The Basement

The kid is talking to the Plant dude.

Man: These two suspect something? We better get rid of them.

The boy nods and leaves. Hearing the news, the plant shivers a little bit.

Man: Don't worry, they can't do anything to us, this planet will be colonized in less than a year.

He starts to leave when the plant shakes again.

Man: Huh? What do you mean? There's no one in here but you and me.

INT: The Lair

Merton is getting ready to leave when Becky comes down the stairs. He has his back turned to her.

Becky: Hello Merton

Merton jumps and turns around.

Merton: Ahh! oh it's you. Hey you called me Merton, is this a brother-sister breakthrough I'm sensing?

Becky's hand forms into a grotesque plant-like claw and shoots 3 vines out at Merton through her wrists. Merton just barely dodges them and they hit the wall.

Merton: Maybe not.

Becky: You must be eliminated.

Merton: Really? Well if that's the way you feel.

Merton picks up a medieval shield and charges but she grabs the shield and throws it to the side. Merton is slowly backing away as Becky is moving forward, claws out.

Merton: Okay, you seem to be pretty sure about this whole "killing me" thing and I respect that, but I think we should just sit down and talk about this like calm, mature…

He hits the wall.

Merton: Gulp, adults. Mocha Latte?

Becky lifts Merton on to the wall.

Becky: You must be eliminated.

Merton examines his situation.

Merton: Yeah I'm getting that.

He head-butts the Becky clone and send her reeling backwards. She comes back charging but Merton dodges the attack and her claws go into the computer, electrocuting her.

Merton: Whoa. Wait a minute, I just killed a monster, I am the man. This is a new era of Merton, strong, brave, heroic…

The claw shakes a little.

Merton: Okay I'm going.

Merton runs off screen.

INT: The Factory

Tommy is sitting at one of the tables a little concerned and looking for Merton. Suddenly, he comes from behind.

Merton: Tommy!

Tommy: Ahh! Jeez Merton, didn't I tell you not to scare me like that?

Merton: We've got problems.

Tommy: Yes we've already established that, you have to stop sneaking up on people.

Merton: I mean creepy problems.

Tommy: What happened?

Merton: I killed my sister.

Tommy: What? Merton, I know she was annoying but come on.

Merton: No, she wasn't my real sister, she was some kind of duplicate, like a clone.

Tommy: Who would want to clone your sister?

Merton: This is serious. She had this weird plant arm and she was bent on my elimination.

Tommy: Well the plant arm is different but other than that…

Merton: I think there's more of them and Allison's one too.

Tommy: What makes you say that?

Merton: All the same characteristics, monotone voice, nice posture…

Tommy: Hey, I thought she said she wasn't coming tonight.

Tommy points to Allison sitting at a table talking to another straight sitting kid.

Merton: What? An evil clone lie to us about her plans? Why that's unheard of.

Tommy gives him another annoyed look just as Allison notices them and runs off

Merton: She's on the move, let's go.

They run out of the door after her.

EXT: The Park

Allison is running through the park faster, than a human could normally go, with Tommy chasing after her and Merton lagging a little behind. Allison jumps in mid-stride and lands on the gazebo, coming down with two plant arms. As she rounds a tree, Tommy comes out from behind, picks her up, and throws her into another tree.

Tommy: Can't say I like the new look.

Merton comes out from behind this tree with a bottle pointed at her head.

Allison: Weed killer?

Merton: I come prepared, now talk.

Tommy: What did you do with the real Allison?

Allison: It's not just her, almost the entire student body has been cloned.

Merton: But why go for the kids, they have no real power?

Allison: Practically everyone in this town has children, we get to the kids, we get to them. You can't do anything to stop us.

Tommy: I kinda thought that's what the weed killer was for, Merton, would you do the honors?

Merton: Thanks man.

Tommy: Don't mention it.

Merton: No, I really appreciate this

Tommy: I'll take the next evil plant monster.

Merton sprays her and she melts into a pile of green mush.

Tommy: Now we gotta find out where they're keeping the bodies.

Merton: What makes you think they are?

Tommy: What do you mean?

Merton: In "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" they didn't.

Tommy: What happened?

Merton: It was followed by a Donald Sutherland remake that had the blood and gore of the times but didn't capture the overall creepiness of the original.

pause

Merton: Yeah I know. Aliens came down and started replacing people with clones using these little buds that they put next to their pillows, then the clones killed the real ones.

Tommy: How did they stop them?

Merton: Well…

INT: The Lair

The original "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" is playing on the small TV, it is playing the final scene where he's running out in the street screaming.

Tommy: Okay, were screwed.

Merton; It's not that bad Tommy, since they went for the kids first I'm guessing they're coming from inside the school itself, we just have to find them.

Tommy: Where exactly would they be?

Merton: It would have to be somewhere out of the way so no one would notice them.

INT: Pleasantville High School, Main Hall

Tommy and Merton are about to walk into the door marked "BASEMENT".

Merton: We seem to be going down here a lot.

Tommy: What do monsters find so homey down there?

Merton: Well it's dark, secluded, I go here to think sometimes.

Tommy: That's really deep, Merton.

Merton: Thanks, now let's melt us some alien plants.

A voice from behind.

Man: Oh we can't have that.

The man in the trench coat has just entered the double doors and both of his arms are changed into claws. Both Merton and Tommy pull super soakers from their backs and are ready to fire but two vines shoot out and throw them across the room. Then two more wrap around them and throw them to the other side of the hall into a set of lockers. Tommy gets up, fully wolfed out and charging.

Tommy: I'm sick of this crap.

Tommy swings at him but he dodges and swipes him in the chest with his claw, causing him to back into the lockers. During the fight Merton crawls to the other end of the hall and picks up one of the super soakers and shoots at the man before he can attack again, he screams and his skin starts bubbling up as he falls down, passing Tommy as gets up.

Merton: Okay, let's go.

Man: Your not gonna win you know.

Merton shoots him with the super soaker and he melts into a pile of mush.

Merton: Shut up.

Tommy: Let's go.

Tommy and Merton walk straight into the door and down the stairs.

INT: The Basement

Tommy and Merton walk determined to kill something and the giant Venus flytrap in the middle of the basement would be sufficient.

Merton: Yuck, the bodies forming into the plant walls aren't exactly fung shway.

Tommy: It's still feeding on them?

Merton: Looks that way.

Merton rests his hand on one of the roots and a thorn shoots out, cutting his hand.

Merton: Ouch!

Tommy: What happened?

Merton: It poked me!

Vines shoot out, wrapping around Tommy and pulling him into one of the walls.

Merton: Uh, Tommy?

One of the pods opens up but instead of a clone, green mush pours out and Tommy punches his way out of the wall.

Tommy: What just happened?

Merton: It's your blood, Tommy, werewolf's not exactly what the alien's used to.

The flytrap starts to convulse and melt away as the kids are breaking out of the walls. A shadow slips out of one of the pods and into a locker unnoticed by the two teenagers

Tommy: I better get out of here.

Merton: Yeah, I'll take care of this.

Tommy leaves to calm down as Merton tries to explain to the kids what happened to them.

INT: The Lair

Merton is trying in vain to clean the slime out of his rug and getting rather frustrated at it while Tommy is reading a book and Allison is looking around the Lair.

Tommy's Inner Monologue

Well, when we destroyed the plant all the clones melted away and some weird guys in sunglasses took the stuff away. The people didn't remember anything about being cloned or about Merton and I saving them, but its just as well.

INT: The Basement

TIM

And yesterday we started a petition to close up the basement, just in case any other creatures wanna take up shop there,

A locker opens and Merton climbs out, his eyes glow light purple and he walks off screen, giggling maniacally.

TIM

But I don't think that's likely.