C

C. R. U. D.

EXT: The Neighborhood, Night

A girl is walking home when she here's a raspy voice from behind her.

Voice: Help me.

She turns around to see a manhole cover tilted open by an unseen hand underneath. She walks over to it and kneels down.

Girl: Are you all right?

A shadowy claw reaches out and pulls her in by her shirt, chomping and screaming is heard for a couple of seconds, then stops. The manhole cover closes.

(Theme Song)

INT: Tommy's House

Tommy walks in on Dean watching Digimon and playing with the little plastic toys. Dean doesn't notice him.

Dean: Damn you Piedmon, why do you have to be so evil?

Tommy is about to say something but catches himself. He slowly picks up his book bag, and slips out the door without Dean seeing him. He starts play fighting with his toys, Agumon and the cactus one.

INT: The School Cafeteria

Merton and Lori are sitting at the table reading different sections of a newspaper when Tommy joins them

Tommy: Hey guys.

Merton & Lori: Hey Tommy.

Tommy notices the article on the back of Merton's paper about the missing girl.

Merton: It's a shame isn't it?

Tommy: Yeah I know.

Merton: Marmaduke just isn't that funny anymore.

Tommy gives him an exhausted look and turns the paper around to the article which Merton then reads.

Merton: Oh, that too.

Tommy: You got the sports section in there?

Merton: Here.

Merton pulls out a section of the paper and gives it to Tommy

Lori: So how was your date with Allison last night?

Merton: Pretty good, I think were ready to start dating exclusively.

Tommy: That's a big change Merton.

Lori: Well for her anyway, you really have no other options.

Merton grins sheepishly and goes back to his paper, a few seconds later the bell rings and they start to leave each other.

Merton: I'll see you guys later all right.

Lori: See ya.

Tommy: Bye.

They leave.

INT: Dank Sewer Corridor

A chubby guy in a jump suit and a safety helmet is running for his life. He trips on something and falls down. He gets up and is pulled up by a shadowy arm.

EXT: The Park, Night

Merton and Allison are sitting on the gazebo in the park.

Allison: This is such a great park.

Merton: You've been here haven't you?

Allison: No, I don't think so.

Merton: Yeah remember, cause we were chasing you and…oh wait that was somebody else.

Allison: It's a nice place though.

(pause)

Merton: Allison, I was wondering if maybe we could…

Allison: See other people?

Merton: No, in fact just the opposite.

Allison: You mean date exclusively.

Merton: Yeah

Allison: So you've been dating other people?

Merton: No, I just wanted to, ya'know, make it official

Allison: Sure.

Merton: Do you want to get out of here.

Allison: Yeah.

EXT: The Bushes, Night

Three leather clad vampires watch Merton and Allison walk off the gazebo from behind the bushes.

The Leader: Well, well, Merton Dingle, I've been waiting a long time for this.

He walks after them as the others follow; they get to a clearing when someone taps the shoulder of the leader. He turns around to see Merton, turns back confused, then turns back again. Merton grabs him with his now mutated arm and throws him against a tree, his eyes glow light purple.

Merton: I've got a job for you.

INT: Tommy's House

Dean is watching the Teletubbies, when Tommy walks in through the front door he turns to the news.

Dean: Hey Tommy.

Tommy: Hey Dean what'cha doin?

Dean: Nothing, just watching mom.

He gestures to the TV where Sally Dawkins is interviewing a police officer

Police Officer: I assure you that we have several leads as to the whereabouts of the latest victim.

Sally: If you're just joining us, this is Officer Bob Makey of the Pleasantville police department and he says they have no leads as of yet.

Bob: I didn't say that, I said we have several leads.

Sally: Like what?

Bob: I'm not at liberty to say.

She looks at him sarcastically and he bursts into tears.

Bob: You're right, we've got nothing. I don't even know what I'm doing here.

Sally: This is Sally Dawkins signing off.

Bob: Hold me.


Dean mutes the TV and looks at Tommy expectantly, he then leaves and goes up the stairs. Dean, upon hearing Tommy hit the last step, flips back to the Teletubbies and laughs childishly.

EXT: Tommy's Front Lawn

The three vampires are standing on the front porch: the leader, the short one, and the other one.

Leader: Okay, all we have to do is knock on the door and say we're the pizza guy.

Short One: But what if they didn't order a pizza?

Leader: Trust me, he did.

A car pulls up in the driveway.

Leader: And here he is now.

The pizza guy steps out of his car with the pizza (natch) and walks up to the porch.

Pizza Guy: Uh, did you order this?

The vampires just smile.

INT: Tommy's House

A struggle complete with cries for help can be heard from outside but Dean is asleep in his chair. The doorbell rings and jerks him awake, he then pulls a lever to the right of his chair, which pulls a string that opens the door.

Dean: Come on in, just leave the pizza on the table.

The leader walks in holding the pizza with the pizza guy's hat on and the other two follow. He puts the pizza on the table and throws the hat on the floor then they go up stairs.

INT: Upstairs Hallway.

The leader knocks on the door to Tommy's room and he opens it.

Tommy: How did you get in here?

The leader lifts him up and throws him across the room.

EXT: Tommy's Front Lawn

Merton walks up to the door and sees that it's ajar. He walks in, notices the pizza on the table, and takes a slice.

Dean: Oh is that my Chinese?

He turns his head around.

Dean: Oh, its you.

Merton: Tommy in?

Dean: Yeah he's upstairs.

Merton walks upstairs.

INT: Upstairs Hallway

Merton walks up to the open door and upon seeing the struggle between the now wolfed out Tommy and the vampires, pulls a crossbow out of his backpack.

Tommy: Merton!

The leader turns around and a stake shoots at him from off screen, reducing him to dust.

Merton: Way ahead of you Tommy.

Merton walks into the room, crossbow ready, and promptly gets thrown across the room. A brawl ensues with Tommy and the newly recovered Merton taking on the two remaining vamps. Tommy stakes the other one with a pencil and the short one jumps out of the window. Tommy and Merton slump down, tired.

Tommy: Why would you carry a crossbow in your backpack?

Merton: For situations just like this one.

Tommy: I thought we got rid of those guys.

Merton: I'll try to find a spell or something so he's not invited in anymore.

Tommy: Thanks man. Hey, I thought you were on a date tonight.

Merton: She had some homework to do so she walked home.

Tommy: Oh

Merton: Oh I almost forgot the reason I came here, somebody else has gone missing.

Tommy: Yeah I saw it on the news.

Merton: No, I mean I think I found out where they are.

Tommy: Okay lets go.

Merton: Oh wait, I wanted to call Allison and she if she got home all right.

Tommy: You know you're really protective of her.

Merton: Well she's my first girlfriend in a while and I don't want her to stop and think too much and realize how better she could do.

Merton picks up the phone and dials.

Tommy: Just don't get too needy.

(pause)

Tommy: What's up?

Merton: No answer.

Tommy: We better get going, you can call back later.

Merton: Yeah, let's go.

EXT: The Street

Tommy and Merton are staring down at the closed manhole cover.

Tommy: The sewer? Why would they be down in the sewer?

Merton: The second victim was a sewage worker who disappeared while on the job, he went down and never came up, so reason states that whatever is kidnapping these people originated from the sewer.

Tommy: What about the girl?

Merton: She must have been lured down.

Tommy: Well lets get this over with.

INT: Dark Sewer Corridor

Tommy and Merton are walking down the dark, murky, corridor with flashlights.

Tommy: What are we looking for by the way?

Merton: I don't know, something big and slimy is my guess.

Tommy: Lovely.

Tommy stops and holds Merton back.

Tommy: Hold up, do you hear that?

Merton: Hear what?

Tommy: Its pretty far away.

Merton: I'm sorry I don't have your werewolf senses, I could have them but you guys never invited me to the camping trips, or parties, or dances…

Tommy: Shut Up

A faint thumping sound gets louder and louder.

Merton: That doesn't sound good.

Tommy: Well obviously.

Merton: Look!

Merton gestures to a boarded up hole in the wall where the rustling has centered to a large room below. Merton and Tommy watch through a small space in the wall as a giant lizard dude (think Spiderman's The Lizard) ordering a bunch of other lizard dudes to dig into the wall.

Leader: Dig!

Other Lizards in Unison: Dig, dig, dig, dig, dig.

Tommy and Merton get up.

Merton: Giant lizards.

Tommy: Was that what you were expecting.

Merton: Actually it was number five on my list of possible sewer dwelling evils.

Tommy: Do you think those are the guys that kidnapped those people?

Merton: It's a pretty good guess.

Tommy: We better do something.

Merton: Yeah, lets leave a very threatening letter.

Tommy: Come on.

Tommy pulls Merton off screen.

INT: Large Room

Merton and Tommy (now wolfed out) walk into the large room and all the lizard men turn their heads to them.

Tommy: Hey freaky lizard people.

Leader: Yes?

Merton: Oh we just wanted to ask you, if its not too much trouble, to stop kidnapping people.

Leader: Well, I respect your opinion but KILL THE INTRUDERS!

A rush of lizard men charge after them and yet another brawl ensues. Scaly green bodies fly everywhere, Tommy is punching and kicking while Merton is being thrown from side to side by two lizards. The fight isn't going their way.

Tommy: I think we better get out of here.

Merton pushes the two lizards aside.

Merton: Yeah.

The two run out the way the came in. The leader sends five to chase after them and orders the rest to keep digging. Tommy and Merton duck into the shadows and the five lizards pass them.

Merton: We really have to work on formulating plans.

Tommy: Barging in and taking them all on at once always worked before.

Merton: They seem to follow their leader pretty obsessively, maybe we could just get rid of him.

Tommy: It's not that easy, we don't know anything about them.

Merton: Well we know their big, ugly, and are intent on digging up, probably to reach the surface.

Tommy: Why don't they just come up the way we came down?

Merton: Beats me.

Tommy: Let's get back up to the surface, we'll think of something.


INT: The Lair

Tommy, Merton, and Lori are sitting around planning.

Lori: I've got nothing.

Merton: Same here.

Tommy: Come on guys, we've got evil monsters plotting evil out there and we need to stop them before they kill again.

Lori: Their demons right? Why don't we check one of the books?

Tommy: The Encyclopedia Demonica?

Lori: G or L?

Merton: I think we're over analyzing this too much.

Lori: What do you think we should do?

Merton: I say we just go in there with weapons and beat the crap out of them.

Tommy: They'll be expecting us now.

Lori: There are plenty of tunnels down there, just pick a different one.

Merton hauls a giant ax over his shoulder.

Merton: Is everyone else ready?

INT: Warehouse.

BANG!

A mutated green fist slams down on a large box and dust flies up. The fist belongs to a very angry Merton who addresses a frightened vampire.

Merton: I hired you to do a simple job, kill Tommy Dawkins. Was it really that hard?

Short Vamp: Well you came in, I mean him, whatever, he caught us by surprise.

Merton: That's all I wanted, the element of surprise. I didn't want to show myself until I'd dug my self a nice little niche here but you force me to…

Short Vamp: We didn't…

Merton: I don't want to hear it. I was trapped in that well for a year because of him, and not to mention all those years before that, all I had was the element of surprise. It's just as well, now that I think about it, I would like to play with their minds first.

Merton walks away but only gets to the door.

Short Vamp: It wasn't our fault.

Merton turns around, shoots a vine out to grab him and pull him in, and jams a stake in his heart.

Merton: I said I didn't want to hear it.

He walks out.

INT: The Large Room

The leader is in charge of the digging as usual when a steel tipped arrow shoots into his shoulder. He turns his head around to look at the arrow but it takes a second for the pain to register.

Leader: Owwwwwwww!

The camera turns around to see the gang standing in front of a small entryway next to the digging spot; Merton is holding the crossbow.

Leader: You can't stop us.

Merton: Sorry but we can't let you escape.

Leader: What?

They walk closer to the leader and continue.

Merton: You know, escape…out of the sewers.

Leader: If we wanted to leave we would have used the manholes.

Tommy gives Merton a look and joins in.

Tommy: Then what are you digging for?

Leader: To release our god of course.

T, M, and L in unison: Your God?

A giant talon shoots out of the wall and then pulls back in.

Lori: Uh oh.

The wall breaks apart and a huge black dragon-like demon jumps out and slams into the ground.

Leader: Bow down to your savior.

All the lizards bow down. The creature reaches out, picks up a lizard dude and eats him. The rest of the lizards get back up.

Leader: Um, we better get goin'.

All the lizards rampage out of the room leaving the gang to the creature.

Tommy: Okay, good monster, no need to start eating anybody.

Lori: It kinda already did.

Tommy: Not helping.

The demon slams his claw into Tommy, driving him into the wall. It lifts its hand up and Tommy limps out as the wolf.

Tommy: Okay…now I'm…mad.

Tommy uses his super speed to zoom to the other side of the room and draw its attention.

Merton: What is that thing?

Lori: I think I recognize it from the book.

Lori picks up the Encyclopedia Demonica and flips to a thumbed page, which she reads.

Lori: It's a Levanak, it lives underground and occasionally comes up to feed.

Merton: Does it say how to kill it?

Lori reads further.

Lori: It's not too fond of light.

Merton checks his watch; it says 6:00 p.m.

Merton: Sun went down a long time ago.

Lori: It doesn't necessarily say natural light.

Merton pulls his flashlight out and shines it at the creature's back; it screams and turns around in anger. Merton yells to Tommy from across the room.

Merton: Tommy! Use your flashlight on it!

Tommy: What?

Merton: Flashlight!

Tommy: It won't do much good!

Merton: Just do it!

Tommy gives up and aims his flashlight at the creature: it screams and roars causing the room to shake.

Merton: We better get out of here.

Lori: Yeah.

INT: Dark Sewer Corridor

The gang runs out of the large room through the main exit and into the corridor, they turn around to watch in shock as the creature runs out and cause the hall to shake with every step. At about ten twenty feet from the group, the ceiling caves in, burying it.

EXT: The Street

Tommy, Merton, and Lori are standing over a huge hole that spans across a part of the street caused by the cave-in.

Merton: I don't see any reason why we should tell anybody about this.

Tommy: Just put some carpet over it, no one will know the difference.

Lori: I better get home.

Merton: Yeah, me too.

The gang walks off screen.

Tommy: I wonder what happened to the lizard people.

INT: Poorly Lit Rec. Room

The lizards are sitting at a folding table playing cards.

Lizard 1: Jeez, it's a good thing we dug this spare room out.

Leader: Please, no more talk about digging.

Lizard 2: Does anyone have any threes?

Lizard 3 gives 2 a card.


Lizard 2: Thanks.

Lizard 1: So what do we do now?

Leader: We rebuild.

Lizard 1: I'm too hungry to rebuild, that cave-in destroyed our food supply.

Lizard 3: Anyone for Chinese?

INT: Pleasantville High School Main Hallway

Merton walks up to Allison who is getting books out of her locker.

Merton: Oh thank god I thought you were eaten by giant lizards.

He fumbles.

Merton: I mean, hi how are you?

Allison: I'm fine, but you have a lot of nerve show your face after what you said last night.

Merton: What?

Allison: You know damn well what I'm talking about.

She walks away just as Tommy walks in.

Tommy: What was all that about?

Merton: I have absolutely no idea.

Tommy just shrugs as Merton walks in the opposite direction.

EXT: Street

Construction workers are sending a guy down in the hole with a rope.

(Tommy's Inner Monologue)

Well the whole thing turned out pretty good, and that section of the sewers was gonna be demolished anyway.

They drop the rope and he falls.

They were trying to find a way to do it without destroying the street but beggars can't be choosers right?