Tuned In
INT: Tommy's Bedroom
Tommy is sleeping in his bed when he suddenly jerks awake.
(Tommy's Inner Monologue)
Did you ever have one of those mornings where you wake up from a dream and something weird happens which makes you wake up again because that was also a dream?
INT: Kitchen
Tommy walks drearily into the kitchen. He drags himself to the refrigerator and opens it. A guy in a banana suit walks out and hands him a snack pack.
INT: Bedroom
Tommy rolls out of bed and slams on the ground face down; he doesn't get up.
(TIM)
I'm pretty sure that means something bad is gonna happen.
EXT: The Street, Day
Bernie walks down the street in a jerky style of movement, as if he was struggling with something inside of him. He passes by a store window and turns to look at his reflection. Rather than seeing himself, he sees Santini, smiling maniacally.
Santini (in the glass): This is my stop.
Bernie, through no will of his own, turns into the building and goes in. The camera pans up to reveal a sign; PBS: Pleasantville Broadcasting Station.
(Theme Song)
INT: Pleasantville Highschool, Main Hallway
Tommy walks down the hall to his locker.
(Tommy's Inner Monologue)
Horrible, bloodcurdling nightmares aside, it's been pretty normal around Pleasantville. I'm starting to think that a lot of the stuff that's been going on was thanks to that evil clone, now that he's gone things have calmed down. Still, something's not right.
He gets to his locker and opens it. Inside he sees the disembodied head of the Werewolf Syndicate Leader, resting in the top compartment.
Leader: Boo.
Tommy: Ahhhhh!
He slams the locker and turns to meet Merton, reveal to be behind the locker door.
Tommy: Ahhhhh!
Tommy falls back in surprise.
Merton (As if nothing happened): Hey Tommy.
Tommy (From the floor as if nothing happened): Hey Merton.
Tommy lifts himself up and dusts himself off.
Merton: You seem edgy.
Tommy: Eh, it's nothing.
Merton pulls a folder out of his notebook.
Tommy: What's that? More blackmailing material to use on Becky?
Merton: No, I'm out of the blackmailing business. It's just my report for History.
Tommy: Merton, do you ever wonder if it all matters?
Merton: What, writing reports?
Tommy: More than that.
Merton: Than what?
Tommy: It's just that maybe being that we live at Creepy Mega Death Central, there may not be much point.
Merton: How is that?
Tommy: I'm only saying that when you fight evil for a living, the future is uncertain.
Merton: Because we might die.
Tommy: Exactly.
Merton: We'll just deal with that when we get there. So
what brought on this line of thinking?
Tommy: Nothing. Just some dreams I've been having.
Merton: Creepy Mega Death dreams?
Tommy: you know it.
Tommy walks off to his class. Merton closes both their lockers.
INT: Station Lobby
Bernie stands in front of the receptionist window for several seconds before going up to it.
Receptionist: Can I help you sir?
Bernie: In.
Receptionist: Come again?
Bernie: Let me in.
Receptionist: I'm sorry, you can't come back here.
Bernie starts to punch the glass in front of the receptionist desk.
Receptionist: Security!
Bernie: Let me in!
Bernie punches through the glass and grabs the receptionist by the throat, lifting her up off the ground.
Receptionist (in a choked voice): Help me!
An electric current starts to flow from Bernie into the receptionist's eyes and mouth. When the flow stops, they both collapse onto the ground in their respective sides of the wall.
INT: Behind the Glass
The receptionist gets up and her eyes flicker with electricity.
Receptionist: Control Room.
She walks down the hallway in front of her office desk and turns into a door. The door closes behind her and we see the words Control Room.
INT: Classroom
Tommy sits in his desk/chair in the back of the class. A documentary on frogs plays on the TV at the front of the room.
Guy on TV: And the Goliath frog here in my hand is one of the largest known to man.
(Tommy's Inner Monologue)
I don't know, maybe making the leap from banana people to utter hopelessness is a bit of a stretch, but I can't help feeling that things would be a lot better without me.
The cord going from the wall to the TV starts to pulsate as a shape travels through it into the TV. Tommy starts to look at all the students.
(TIM)
My being a werewolf has been the cause of a lot of the deadly weirdness around here, hell I wonder if monsters even came here before I got bit.
Guy on TV: And this here is the horned tailed frog that (His voice suddenly changes) Tommy Dawkins? Can you hear me Tommy Dawkins?
Tommy suddenly perks up. He starts to speak.
Guy: Shut up. Don't say anything.
The guy on TV glares maniacally. Tommy doesn't seem too upset or surprised.
Guy: You will die horribly in the worst possible way imaginable.
Tommy: Will I?
Guy: Maggots will eat your brain while you're conscience, feeling every
excruciating bite.
Tommy: Will they?
Guy: Your end will come soon.
Tommy: Sure it will.
The bell rings and everybody files out just as the teacher clicks off the TV. The speaker on the wall crackles and a voice comes on.
Speaker: Mr. Bell, I need to see you in the office immediately.
The teacher at the front of the class gets up and leaves. That's when Tommy finally gets up and goes to the TV. He taps the screen.
Tommy: Anybody in there?
Nothing happens.
Tommy: Guess not.
Tommy leaves the room and closes the door. The TV clicks off and the nature Guy looks toward the door with a sickening smile.
(TIM)
This is not a normal day.
EXT: Graveyard, Day Establishing
INT: Mausoleum
Allison walks slowly into the now relatively clean up Mausoleum, carefully trying not to step on anything important. All evidence of Evil Merton has been cleared away, most likely by the ever-present government entity.
Allison: So what do you expect to find in here, dust and rocks?
The Leader sweeps into frame, as if appearing out of nowhere.
Leader: Don't forget dead bodies.
Allison: I think it's empty.
Leader: There has to be something here.
Allison: Like what?
Leader: Talismans, charms, something magical. This guy was into the darkness.
He starts to look around.
Allison: I guess I should look, what with you being intangible and all.
The Leader's hand swipes through a coffin like air.
Leader: Let's try that desk over there.
Allison goes over to a desk that has been completely gutted of it's drawers, a shell of it's former desky self.
Allison: I don't think we're gonna find anything in here.
Leader: You said this place was furnished last night.
Allison: It was, it looks like someone's cleaned house.
Allison notices something behind the desk, sticking out of the wall.
Allison: What's that?
Leader: What?
She pushes a switch into the wall and that portion of the wall flips down, a secret room full of scrolls and magical looking items.
Allison: Jackpot.
The Leader goes into the room and examines the contents of another desktop inside. A parchment is rolled out on the table.
Allison: Looks like this guy was a secret agent.
Leader: What is this?
Allison: Medieval Chinese Food Menu?
Leader: It looks like…no, it couldn't be.
Allison: Couldn't be what?
Leader: The Prophecies of Averon.
Allison: Oh, musty old prophecies.
Leader: Really old, centuries old.
Allison: What does it say?
Leader: I'm not sure, I can't read Latin.
Allison: Is this all you want?
Leader: All of these scrolls go together, I'll need all of them.
Allison: You're lucky I'm starting to get my werewolf strength.
Leader: Thank you for helping, I would get them but…
Allison: I know, I know, partial existence, you told me already.
She starts to collect the scrolls and pick them up, about twenty of them.
Allison: but you're gonna have to start pulling your own wait.
Leader: Wait.
Allison: Sure cap, what do you need?
Leader: This collection is not complete.
Allison: How do you know.
Leader: I can smell it.
Allison: You can smell the absence of scrolls?
Leader: No but I can smell one on you.
Allison: Uh huh.
Leader: I need you to help me find it.
Allison: I've never even seen it.
Leader: You've been near it. What about your boyfriend Merton; you've been to his room, it must be there?
Allison: The Lair?
Leader: He actually calls it that?
Allison: Don't start. I'll get it for you.
INT: School Cafeteria
Merton sits at a table with a musty old book and a official looking form, he seems to be going from one to the other at a quick pace until Becky joins him and sits down, causing him to jump.
Becky: Hey Merton.
Merton (slightly confused): Hey Becky. Shouldn't you be
over there with your friends not being related to me?
Becky: Why would I do that?
Merton: I just thought you would continue the daily trend of ignoring me.
Becky: I don't ignore you. (Off his look) I don't!
Merton: What do you want?
Becky: I just wanted to see what the gang was up to.
Merton looks to the right and left of him, looking for people that obviously
aren't there.
Merton: Well, the joint is jumping.
Becky: Where's Tommy?
Merton: He skipped lunch today.
Becky: So anything going on?
Merton: Yeah actually, I'm looking into a cult of brain sucking aliens.
Apparently they slurp your gray matter from your nose.
Becky: Really?
Merton: No, I was just making it up, but now I see what's up. I thought you said you didn't want anything to do with the superhero monster party.
Becky: I did and I don't; but I realize that you guys are protecting the town and everything and if I can help I will.
Merton: Look, I know the life sounds cool but there is a lot of blood, gore, and goat placenta spells you don't want to be anywhere near. Then there's the stress.
Becky: I can handle it.
Merton: Okay, pop quiz hotshot. Evil alien plant clones have taken over the school, what do you do? What do you do?
Becky: Weed killer.
Merton: Okay, good; But now an army of insane werewolves have kidnapped one of your teammates and have him hung up for sacrifice. What now?
Becky: I take out the leader and the rest follow.
Merton: Very good grasshopper, have you been reading my war journal?
Becky: What, you mean that pink notebook with the kittens all over it.
Merton: Um, a clever disguise to ward off enemies.
Becky: So am I in.
Merton: Sorry Becky, I just cant put you at risk.
Becky: Merton, I could kick your ass so bad.
Merton: You're inexperienced, I don't want to put you in danger.
Becky: Fine, I guess I'll just have to fight evil by myself.
She gets up and walks off in a huff.
Merton: At least she didn't call me…
Becky (off screen): Freaker!
EXT: Pleasantville High, Day, Establishing
A bell rings and kids walk out to their respective homes.
EXT: Tommy's House, Day, Establishing
Tommy walks into the living and heads straight for the kitchen. The camera pans over to Dean as he watches So Little Time (you know, that ridiculously moronic show before and after Big Wolf). The television image flickers and cuts off. Dean starts to voice protest but is cut off by Santini who has appeared on the screen.
Santini: Hello Dean?
Dean: You!
Santini: Yes it's me, and I need your help.
Dean: This is just another bad dream.
Santini: You weren't dreaming before and you aren't dreaming now. I need to borrow your body, I'll be sure to return it in good condition.
Dean: No…
Dean can no longer talk as an electric current shoots out of the TV and into Dean's eyes.
INT: Kitchen
Tommy closes the fridge after pulling out a snack pack and walks into the living room. He notices the Dean is not in his chair and gets freaked out.
Tommy: Dean?
He turns and Dean is standing behind him.
Tommy: Hi Dean.
Dean (Santini's voice superimposed over Dean's): Hello Tommy.
Tommy: You have a cold? (Catching himself) no wait, your probably possessed by some evil demon aren't you?
Dean: Something like that.
Tommy turns and runs but Dean opens his mouth and the electric current shoots out and into Tommy, swooping around his head and into his eyes. They both collapse on the ground. Tommy stands up and his eyes flash up with electricity to show that he is possessed. He walks out the front door, stepping over Dean's unconscience body.
INT: The Lair
Merton has finished writing out his form and folds it up. He gets up and leaves the room and Allison steps out from the shadows.
Allison: Now, if I was an old dusty scroll, where would I be?
She closes her eyes and suddenly we flash into her super werewolf senses. The camera is distorted and red, like an animal's POV. She starts to search the room with her mind. The animal vision moves to a cabinet and stops at a scroll almost identical to the ones from the other scene.
Allison (Coming out of it): There you are.
She gracefully walks over to the cabinet and rips off the door. She pulls out the scroll and starts to walks out of the room. Before she leaves, she sniffs the air and looks perplexed. Disregarding it, Allison walks out. When she closes the door we see Becky standing behind it with a confused look on her face.
EXT: Broadcasting Station, Day
Merton walks up to the PBS office and notices the yellow police tape around the door. He tries to go in when a policeman stops him.
Cop: Can't you read?
Merton: No, I'm illiterate and I'm a little embarrassed about it if you don't mind.
Cop: This is a crime scene, you can't come in.
Merton: What happened?
Cop: Somebody committed a crime.
Merton: Which was?
Cop: None of your business.
Merton: Right.
Cop: What's your name?
Merton: Merton J. Dingle.
Cop: No, seriously, what's your name.
Merton: That is my name.
Cop: What are you doing here?
Merton: I'm putting my application in.
Cop: Why do you want to work here?
Merton: Just one small step to show business.
Cop: Well, you're not getting in here any time soon, this is a crime scene.
Merton: As you said, and the colorful yellow tape was a given.
Cop: Than take a hint and get out of here.
Merton: Can I just drop this off?
Cop: No.
Merton: Fine, if you want to be snippy about it I'll take my business elsewhere.
He walks away. As he passes an alley, Tommy walks out and up to the PBS station.
Cop: Jeez, is everybody putting in applications today?
Tommy: Let me in please.
Cop: No, you'll have to come back later.
Tommy: Just remember, I asked nicely once.
Tommy wolfs out and grabs the cop by his neck, picking him off the ground.
INT: Control Room
The ground is lined with unconscience people in heaps. The camera tracks the heaps and pans up to a computer console that apparently controls all television broadcasts in Pleasantville. The wall is lined with TVs that have the color bars on them. The door opens and Tommy walks in. When he gets to the center of the room, the current shoots out of him and into one of the TVs, causing him to fall to the ground. He instantly snaps to attention and gets back up. He looks around confused.
Tommy: What the crap is going on with this?
The TV shoots out another beam and it causes Tommy to go unconscience again.
INT: Black Room of Nothingness
Tommy appears in a four cornered room of all black.
Tommy: I reiterate; what the crap is going on with this?
A figure in a black suit steps in front of him.
Santini: It's called revenge.
Tommy looks up and sees Santini above him.
Tommy: Well, it's that kind of day.
(Commercial Break)
Tommy is standing and looking on as Santini walks around him.
Tommy: So, you finally stepped up to the plate, huh?
Santini: What?
Tommy: Well, it's just that every other evil villain I take out seems to be coming back up for some revenge. I guess it was only a matter of time before I had to see your ugly face again. You could have at least worked on the teeth; don't they have a dental plan in hell?
Santini pulls out a small note pad.
Santini: I must ask you to refrain from talking that much, I'm contractually obligated to read you the rules of your capture and there isn't much time.
Tommy: What contract?
Santini: The contract that states whether or not you get to keep your body.
Tommy: I know I never signed anything like that.
Santini: It doesn't work that way.
Tommy: So what are the rules?
Santini: Excuse me? I just told you that you could lose your purchase on your
own body. Where's the fear and confusion?
Tommy: This isn't the day for fear, let's get on with this.
Santini: Fare enough. You have been converted to electricity and brought into the dimension you watch everyday on your television. I have brought you here to both exact my revenge and gain a physical from in the real world. You will have twelve hours to travel through the fabric of this reality. If you survive you will be transported back instantly. If you die, I gain full control of your body.
Tommy: Care to explain that again.
Santini: You live you win, you die I win.
Tommy: Wait a minute, this is just like that John Ritter movie.
Santini: Yeah, we made that one.
Tommy: Really?
Santini: Only a force of unspeakable evil could have produced something like that.
Tommy: Well, Jeffrey Jones had his moments.
Santini: Please, I need to get this over with.
Tommy: No, I understand. Except for the part about you getting my body.
Santini: It's pretty simple, currently I am not a physical being in your reality. If you die than your body will be empty and open for me to enter.
Tommy: I don't want you in my body.
Santini: You don't have a choice in the matter.
Tommy: Well that just doesn't seem right. Why do you even want my body?
Santini: I had a cushy government job before you came along and killed me. Now I have to pay tribute to a group of evil creatures in a hell dimension of horrible torment.
Tommy: Television?
Santini: Exactly. So the moment I gathered enough energy, I commissioned this set up. Your body is my ticket out of here and into the real world again.
Tommy: Trust me, the real world isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Santini: I have to leave now so have fun and preferably die a horrible death.
Tommy: I'll try my best.
Santini: Ta ta.
A remote control shoots out of Santini's sleeve and he pushes the channel button. Suddenly the area around Tommy changes to show a jungle.
EXT: Jungle, Day
Tommy stands in the clearing of a jungle, birdcalls and all.
Tommy: Well this isn't so bad.
Suddenly we hear thundering footsteps and a giant T-Rex jumps out from the trees and after Tommy.
Tommy: Or maybe not.
EXT: Graveyard, Day
Allison walks through the graveyard and into the Mausoleum. Becky walks out from behind a tree and follows. She walks up to the Mausoleum and looks in through the window. She sees Allison talking to the Leader over the pile of scrolls. She hands him the one stolen from the Lair.
Becky: What is going on?
INT: Mausoleum
The Leader senses something.
Allison: What?
Leader: Someone's watching us.
Allison: How do you know?
Leader: I just know.
He looks down at her.
Allison: Fine, I'll go check.
She turns around and wolfs out, then walks out toward the door.
EXT: Mausoleum, Day
Allison walks out of the mausoleum and looks around. Seeing nothing, she goes back in. The camera pans over to the side of the building where Becky has hidden. She runs off.
INT: Control Room
The TVs all show a heart monitor (The line that spikes along with heart rate) show Tommy's statis as his lifeless body sits in front of them.
EXT: Jungle, Day
Camera shows a patch of foliage. Tommy bursts through in mid run and zooms past, followed by the dinosaur behind him.
Tommy: Not good, not good, not good, not good, not good, not good.
INT: Control Room
Tommy's eyes open.
EXT: Jungle, Day
Tommy braces himself for massive teeth but they never come. He opens his eyes and looks up to see the dinosaur has disappeared. He gets up and sees that a bunch of cave men have subdued the dinosaur by tying to the ground. Three of the cave men turn to Tommy.
Tommy: Thanks guys, I really appreciate the assist but I have to get out of here.
Tommy is bonked in the head and falls to the ground to reveal another cave man behind him with a club.
INT: Tommy's House
There's a knock at the door.
Dean: Come in.
The door opens and Merton walks in.
Merton: Hey Dean.
Dean: Hey Merton.
Merton: Tommy in?
Dean: No, hasn't come home yet.
Merton: Not at all.
Dean: Nope.
Merton: That's strange.
Dean: I try not to dwell on it.
Merton: Aren't you worried?
Dean: He'll be back, he always comes back.
Merton: Something wrong, Dean?
Dean: No, I'm fine.
Merton: Sure?
Dean: Just some bad dreams.
Merton: If Tommy comes in, tell him I was here okay?
Dean: Sure.
Merton walks back out of the door. The camera pans over to Dean who is furiously twiddling his thumbs, trying to think of anything but his "nightmare". We see Tommy on the TV screen lying on stone ground unconscience.
EXT: Cave, Dusk
Tommy lies unconscience by a fire in front of a cave. He is poked with a stick by a cave man. He jerks awake and sits up.
Tommy: What?
The cave man grunts.
Tommy: Well thanks for clearing that up.
The cave man motions for Tommy to get up, which he does.
Tommy: Okay, just calm down. I can explain everything. Wait a minute, what do I have to explain? You're a bunch of monkey people.
The cave men start to jump up and down and get agitated.
Tommy: No offense though. So this is the TV dimension huh? Must be a Discovery Channel thing, maybe not historically accurate.
He leans down to talk to the crouching cave man and talks to him as you would a
child.
Tommy: Do you know your not supposed to exist with dinosaurs?
Cave Man: Grunt.
Tommy: Do you know how to get out of here.
Cave Man: Grunt.
Tommy: You're no help at all are you?
Cave Man: Grunt.
Tommy sits in front of the fire in defeat. The cave man shambles over and shoves a leg of roasted meet in Tommy's face.
Tommy: No thanks man.
He offers it again.
Tommy: I don't want your maggot meat man.
He takes it from the cave man and throws it in the woods.
Tommy: There, now the Sabertooth Tigers will have it.
All the cave men stand up and start to approach Tommy who intern backs up.
Tommy: Okay guys, I'm sorry. Just cool it.
He is backed into a tree. He jumps out of the way just as a batch of arrows shoots into the tree. Tommy comes back up.
Tommy: Hey, when did you get arrows?
Tommy runs over to the woods entrance and picks up the leg meat.
Tommy: Look guys, it's still good.
He picks off a piece of dirt and leaves.
Tommy: Just a little dirty, but not so much that you'd mind.
The cave men draw up their crossbows.
Tommy: Not that I'm saying you're dirty, even though you really are.
They shoot and he again dodges, only to stand up and stare them down.
Tommy: Okay, no more of this.
Tommy snarls and the screen does that zoom and swirl effect to show Tommy wolfing out, only when the effect ends he is still normal.
Tommy: Now it's go time.
He starts to get ready to fight but then he realizes something is wrong. He pulls at what should be fur and sighs.
Tommy: It's just that kinda day.
Tommy fights off the cave men as best as a teenage human can. In the middle of the battle, Santini appears.
Santini: Don't expect to get out of this by wolfing out.
Tommy: You did that?
Santini: I wouldn't make it that easy.
Tommy: And the crossbows too, I bet.
Santini: Inspiration.
Tommy: Did I say what a snappy suit that is?
Santini: No you didn't but thanks for noticing. The people I work for said I should wear it, said I'd look more like an evil villain in a suit.
Tommy: It really helps pull it off.
Santini: So, striking out on the first channel, huh?
Tommy: I have the upper hand, what are you talking about?
While Tommy's head it turned to Santini, an arrow shoots into his leg.
Tommy: Just don't talk to me, please.
Tommy slumps down next to the fire and pulls out the arrow. HE then picks up a flaming log from inside the fire to use as a weapon. He stands up and gets surrounded.
Tommy: Back off guys.
A cave man lunges and receives a fiery jab for his trouble.
Tommy: That's right, fire bad!
Santini: You really think a flaming log will hold them back.
Tommy: It seems to work fine.
Santini: These guys invented fire.
Tommy: Shut up!
Tommy is backed up to a strange looking wall and lifts up the flaming log. Instead of attacking, he moves the log to his right and burns a rope to the point of snapping. The camera pans and we see the T-Rex that was being tied down in the previous scene has now gotten free. Tommy jumps out of the way and the dinosaur starts chomping on some cave man lunch. Tommy stands up and dusts himself off as Santini walks up to him.
Tommy: See? Upper hand all the time.
Santini: Good job.
Tommy: You know you love it.
Santini draws his remote control and sends Tommy away.
INT: American Gladiator Stadium
Tommy teleports in just as he is hit in the chest by that staff thing with the two really padded ends. Tommy falls off a thin walkway he and an American Gladiator were standing on and lands with a thud.
Tommy's POV from the ground. Santini looks down at Tommy.
Santini: No, but I love that.
INT: The Factory
The camera pans through the crowd until it reaches Merton, sitting at a table and reading the old book he was reading at lunch. He flips the pages back to check on something, but doesn't seem to comprehend or can't admit the validity of what he's just read. On the other side of the room, Allison swoops in majestically, with Becky following behind. Becky watches as Allison gets closer and closer to Merton's table. Over by Merton's table, Allison sits down and starts to talk, only to be interrupted Becky who jumps into the third seat.
Allison: Hi Mer…
Becky: Hey Merton.
Allison: Becky.
Merton: Hey girls, what's up?
Allison: I have to talk to you.
Becky: So do I.
Merton: Okay, which one's life or death?
Becky: Mine.
They all look at her strangely.
Becky: I mean, no. Not life or death persay.
Merton: I really don't have time right now. I'm sorry, I gotta go.
He gets up and leaves Becky with Allison.
(pause)
Becky: So, how's every little thing?
Allison: Good.
Becky: Good.
(pause)
Becky: Gotta go.
Becky quickly shuffles away from the table, as fast as she possibly can. Allison sits alone. She sniffs the air and looks back to where Becky was sitting. A look of subtle realization flashes across her face.
INT: American Gladiator Stadium
A giant spear is thrust right at the camera. When it is pulled back we see that a heavily armored gladiator is fighting with a now lightly armored Tommy (It's a sight gag to show that the universe is catering to the safety of the gladiator rather than Tommy). Tommy dodges several more spear slashes until he is tripped and thrown to the ground. He quickly moves his head to avoid two more stabs and then kicks the gladiator down with him. Tommy jumps up and grabs his opponents spear and jabs it at him, stopping right at the jugular. The lights suddenly dim and spotlights swoop around. A giant TV screen flashes on and an announcer who looks a lot like Santini without makeup appears on it.
Santini: Let's all give a round of applause to our challenger, Tommy Dawkins!
The crowd boos with venomous rage and Tommy is hit by several wadded by papers and narrowly dodges a beer.
Tommy: Very funny.
A buzzer sounds.
Santini: Oh, you all now what that means. It's time for the Gauntlet!
Tommy looks on as the mat floor in front of him opens up and a giant obstacle course rises up.
Tommy: Oh yeah right, that is so unrealistic.
Two big dudes in armor appear out of nowhere behind Tommy and escort him to his fate.
INT: The Gauntlet
Tommy stands on a platform overlooking a big drop and the various obstacles of the course. He looks over and sees his new opponent, another gladiator getting ready to jump off. Santini appears behind Tommy and whispers in his ear.
Santini: Come on Tommy, smile, entertain the people.
Tommy smiles a little bit and both contestants are pushes off the platform by unseen hands.
INT: The Lair
Merton sits in a chair watching the end credits of So
Little Time on TV.
ABC Family Announcer: Stay tuned for four more hours of Mary Kate and Ashley
Olsen.
Merton looks at his clock, which reads 7:55.
Merton: Sorry man…
He starts to switch channels, blipping past American Gladiators and not noticing Tommy fighting for his life.
Merton: …but it's time for a brand new episode of…
He lands on a channel and finds only static.
Merton: Oh, crap.
He bangs the side of the TV but it doesn't change.
Merton: Okay Merton, just calm down and think about this.
Merton thinks for a moment and runs off screen.
EXT: The Street, Night
Becky walks cautiously down the street to her house. She hears a rustling behind her and turns to look around. Seeing nothing, she turns back around to run face to face with Allison.
Allison: Hi Becky.
Becky: Hey Allison.
Allison: How's every little thing?
((Commercial Break))
It is the same scene as before. Allison circles Becky, not unlike a predator and its prey.
Becky: So…what's goin' on?
Allison: Nothing, just wondering what you were thinking about.
Becky: Not much, I don't think much really.
Allison: Well you did have something on your mind before. You seemed to want to tell Merton about something. Life or death right (emphasizing the "death")?
(Tense pause)
Becky (Strangely calm): Okay, you know what? I don't like this whole crippling fear thing so I'm just gonna get this over with. I know you're Merton's girlfriend and this really isn't my business but you're a werewolf and I don't want you to bite or kill my brother. Now I am scared out of my mind right now and I'm probably gonna go home and weep uncontrollably, if you don't kill me. So if you're going to kill me, just get it over with; otherwise, (badass like) don't waste my time.
Allison looks a little dumbfounded.
Allison: Okay.
Becky: Okay to what?
Allison: I'm not gonna kill you.
Allison moves to attack but doesn't to see if Becky would flinch, she doesn't.
Allison: You got spunk.
Becky breathes a sigh of relief and turns away. She runs face to face with Allison yet again (super speed, remember?).
Allison (Venomous): But if you tell any of your little friends about me, I wont only kill you but I'll kill every person you've ever met in the worst way, starting with big brother. Got it?
Becky: Okay. You know, you're not the queen of subtlety.
Allison moves back and disappears (in the super speed sense, not the vanishing sense.). Becky continues her walk.
Becky: Becky, what have you gotten yourself into?
INT: The Gauntlet
On closer inspection, the obstacle course looks more like a torture rack, with swinging axes and spears that shoot out of the wall. There looks like a slim chance to pass through, as Tommy and his opponent get ready.
Tommy: So what do you think our chances are here.
Opponent: Shut up and wait for the bell!
Tommy: Fair enough.
They wait a few seconds. Tommy starts to hum, much to the annoyance of his
opponent. The bell rings and the gate in front of them opens.
INT: The Lair
Becky runs into the Lair.
Becky: Merton? Are you there.
Frustrated, she moves over to the book cabinet and looks through it to find a book. She pulls one out and opens it to a page in the middle. Close up on the page, which reads How To Kill A Werewolf.
INT: The Gauntlet
Tommy and his opponent are racing side by side on a very thin platform that barely holds the both of them. They fight each other for space while trying to avoid falling into what we now see as a giant, almost unfathomable, pit of spikes.
Tommy: Hey, could you just ease a bit?
He receives a push for his trouble.
Tommy: Okay then.
They reach a shaky looking wooden bridge and stop. They look to each other, quietly deciding who should take the first move. The opponent takes the chance and runs across the bridge with Tommy running cautiously behind him. He grips the rope holds on both sides and tries to steady him self amidst the shaking caused by the other person on the bridge.
Tommy: Okay, baby steps.
He looks up to find that his opponent has reached the end and has started to cut the ropes holding up the bridge.
Tommy: Or giant steps, giant steps are good.
Tommy breaks into a run across the bridge, trying to get to the end before it falls. A few seconds of running gets him to the end, just as the rope is cut and the bridge falls. Tommy grabs hold of the bridge as it slams against the wall, slowly climbing upwards.
Tommy: Just. That. Kind. Of. Day.
EXT: The Street, Night
Merton is driving down the street, making a big show of being in a hurry.
INT: The Gauntlet
Tommy has since miraculously climbed the entire length of the bridge and is struggling to get up onto the ledge.
Tommy: That guys gonna pay for that.
INT: Another Part of the Gauntlet
Tommy stands at the entrance of a series of swinging axes and spear shooting walls in a straight line at the end of which is a door. He braces himself for a painful death, than quickly runs into the fray. He dodges every blade and spike and almost too easily gets to the end.
Tommy: Wasn't so tough.
A spear shoots out at him, passing right in front of his face.
Tommy: I'm gonna go now.
He quickly shuffles through to the door.
INT: Claustrophobic Lobby Room
Tommy enters a small elevator like room and almost runs into the opponent, who appears to have been waiting a while.
Opponent: Glad you could make it.
Tommy: What's up?
Opponent: Time release, waits for us both.
Tommy: Hmm, makes the last part seem kinda pointless, doesn't it?
Opponent: Yeah.
The door in front of them opens and they are shown the next stage, a twisting and turning maze of deadly traps, both booby and other wise. They both get out of the small room and again, wait for each other to make the first move. They both sprint down the lanes at the same time, both coming ahead of each other at different times. What proceeds is a montage of them moving through the course, until they both get to end, a giant pit.
Tommy: What are you gonna do now man?
Opponent: Well, I was going to push you in and see if I could make the jump.
Tommy: Which order?
The opponent shoves Tommy into the pit but he catches himself before he falls into it. The opponent then runs back and performs a spectacular running jump across the pit. He looks back to taunt Tommy, only to receive a shock when Tommy performs an equally amazing jump across the pit. He grabs the opponent and brings him to the ground.
Tommy: What now huh?
He punches him.
Tommy: That's for cutting the rope.
He then picks up the opponent and throws him into the pit to fall to his death.
Tommy: And that's just because I'm having a really bad day.
Tommy walks up to a podium at the end and it starts to rise, until it comes up to the giant TV screen from a few scenes ago. Santini appears on the screen.
Santini: Good job.
Tommy: Thanks, I was kind of unsure about it back there but I pulled it out in the end.
Santini: It's time to go.
Tommy: Got it.
Special Effects Shot: A giant hand comes out of the TV screen and grabs Tommy, pulling him back in.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
Tommy teleports into the Werewolf Syndicate meeting room in werewolf form and in a long black robe (Note: Obviously this is not the real Werewolf Syndicate, just read on.). Tommy looks down at his hands.
Tommy: Hey, I'm a werewolf again.
He looks at the robe.
Tommy: What is this?
An arrow shoots at him from off screen and hits the wall next to him. He looks in the direction of the shot and sees Vesper, our very own Muffy the Werewolf Slayer.
Tommy: Muffy?
Muffy: Down puppy.
She brings up her crossbow and shoots again. Tommy jumps out of the way.
INT: Tommy's Living Room
Merton opens the door and pokes his head in.
Merton: Tommy, you in?
He sees only Dean, sitting in his chair, watching TV (coincidentally, he's watching Muffy the Werewolf Slayer). Merton's runs up to him and sits on the arm of the chair.
Merton: Cool, it's on. What did I miss?
Dean: Oh hey Merton, Muffy just escaped from the dungeon and now she's raiding the Syndicate of Werewolves.
Merton (not sarcastic): Wow, where do they come up with this stuff.
On the TV screen Muffy is blasting werewolves with arrows with super human speed and accuracy. Dozens of werewolves scatter to avoid the bolts, except one who gets up from the floor and stands right in front of her. He looks to the camera and Merton and Dean see Tommy inside the TV.
Dean: Ahhhhh!
Dean, seeing another nightmare, leads off screen, presumably to cry in a heap on the floor. Merton sits in the chair and grabs the remote.
Merton: Oh God, Tommy?
INT: Werewolf Syndicate (TV Show)
Tommy is confronting Muffy, using calm body language.
Tommy: Muffy, it's me, Tommy.
Muffy: I don't know any Tommy.
Tommy: You know, Tommy the good werewolf. The kind you don't want to shoot.
Muffy: There's such thing as a good werewolf. Except a dead one.
With that she shoots another arrow, which Tommy dodges.
Muffy: Now be a good werewolf and stay still.
Muffy leads into attack mode and starts to fight Tommy hand to hand. Tommy holds his own for a while but he's no match for a werewolf slayer and he soon goes down. Muffy aims her crossbow at his head and he points to a spot beside her.
Tommy: Muffy, look behind you.
INT: Tommy's Living Room
Merton is still watching the show.
Merton: Oh, come on Tommy, you don't really expect her to fall for that, do you?
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
Same scene as before
Muffy: You don't really expect me to fall for that, do you?
Tommy: No, I'm serious. For the love of God look behind you.
Muffy: Just don't.
Tommy: I'm telling you, if you don't look behind you right now, you're life might be in horrible danger.
Muffy (annoyed): Fine
She looks behind her and Tommy trips her and rolls away.
Tommy: Sucker!
Tommy runs off down the hall.
Muffy: Dammit!
INT: What Would Be Deirdre's Study.
Tommy runs into a room, which looks suspiciously like Deirdre's study. He looks to one wall and sees a giant television screen with an equally giant Merton looking in.
Tommy: Merton?
Merton: Tommy?
Tommy: You have to help me, I've been sucked into the TV.
Merton: I kinda guessed that. How did this happen?
Tommy: Santini's back.
Merton: These creeps just don't say down, do they?
Tommy: So what's new with you?
Merton: Oh, nothing much. How do I get you out of here?
Tommy: My bodies at the TV station, I'll explain later.
Merton: I'm on it.
INT: Deirdre's Room
Tommy watches the TV disappear into the wall and someone walks in behind him. He turns, bracing for the worst, but finds another robed werewolf.
Wolf: Come on brother, we must flee.
Tommy mentally considers his options, then goes with the werewolf.
EXT: The Street, Night
Merton is driving the hearse down the street until it starts to sputter and finally breaks down.
Merton: I guess it's just one of those days.
Merton gets out of the car and runs down the street.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate, Main Hallway
Tommy and several other werewolves are running out of the back entrance when others of their kind stop them from behind.
Werewolf: Wait up, we don't have to run anymore.
They all turn to see that Muffy has been captured, in the hands off two werewolves.
EXT: Cable Station, Night
Merton runs up to the door and stops to catch his breath. After a long sequence of this, He walks into the building, stepping over the still unconscience cop (damn that must have been a good punch).
Merton: You're doing a great job there, man.
He walks in.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
Muffy struggles to get out of a pair of manacles that she has since been placed into, attached to the wall. The werewolves, including Tommy, look on.
Wolf 1: What should we do with her?
Wolf 2: We should kill her.
Wolf 1: Of course, we'll kill her. I meant in what way.
Wolf 3: Painful?
Wolf 1: (sigh) I'm associated with morons.
Tommy: Maybe we should let her go.
Wolf 1: What?
Muffy: What?
Tommy: I said, maybe we should let her go.
Wolf 1: Why would we do that?
Tommy goes up to Muffy and addresses the group.
Tommy: I don't know, you know, we could…hunt her for sport?
INT: Cable Station
Merton walks into the lobby and sees the path of destruction leading to the control room.
Merton: This seems just too easy.
He walks into the control room.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
There's a tense pause as the crowd considers Tommy's suggestion.
Wolf 1: That's a great idea.
Tommy: That's why I just came up with it, just then. I'm just gonna check these chains, they look loose.
Tommy turns to Muffy and starts to "check the chains".
Tommy (whisper to Muffy): Play along, I'll get you out of these.
He unlocks the chains and Muffy kicks him across the room.
Tommy (From the wall): I don't think you understand the concept of "playing along".
Wolf 2: She's free!
Wolf 3: We gotta get outta here!
All the werewolves scramble.
INT: Control Room
Merton walks in and notices the trail of unconscience people.
Merton: This does not bode well.
He looks the center of the room and sees an unconscience Tommy sitting in front of the heart monitor TVs. He rushes over.
Merton: Tommy, you alive? Of course, you're alive, just in the TV. Dammit, why do I have to put myself in situations where sentences like that make sense?
Tommy suddenly pops awake and sits up.
Merton: Tommy, you're out, come on we gotta go.
Tommy: Out?
Merton: Of the TV. Oh, you don't remember?
Tommy: Oh, the TV, yeah, now I got it.
Merton: Let's go.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
Tommy gets up and Muffy pulls up her cross bow, aimed at him.
Muffy: Nice try, creature.
Tommy: Oh come on, I just saved your life.
Muffy looks unsure.
INT: Control Room
Merton is turned to leave, assuming Tommy is following.
Merton: We've gotta go before Santini comes back.
Tommy: I'm afraid that's not possible.
Merton: Why?
Tommy: Well…
Merton (Not turning around): No, let me guess, you're not really Tommy, but Santini in his body.
Tommy: Actually, that's dead on.
Merton: We get a lot of this sort of thing.
He turns around.
Merton: Let's do this thing, I'm missing my show.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
It is the same scene as before.
Tommy: Okay, let's just talk about this.
Muffy: Sorry, no time. More werewolves to kill.
Tommy: See, I know you've got this 'kill werewolves" mentality but have you really thought about all the different perspectives?
Muffy: No, I'm sticking with mine
INT: Control Room
Merton and Santini in Tommy's body are fighting in the center of the room. Santini wolfs out and snarls at his opponent.
Merton: Now I don't know about you but most villains like to talk a bit first. You know, the "you can't stop me, it's too late to save your friend" kind of thing.
Santini: Well, you can't stop me, it is too late to save your friend, and I have already won, but that whole thing does seem a bit trite, don't you think.
Merton: Fare enough.
Merton jumps and Santini swats him aside with one hand.
Santini: Werewolf strength, dimwit.
Santini looks at the monitors and they show the line getting weaker. He blinks and the TVs change channels to see Muffy and Tommy standing off.
Santini: Won't be long now.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
There is a stand off going down as seen on the TV screens.
Tommy: Okay fine, if your gonna shoot me, then shoot me. I've been through enough crap today for apparently no reason and this seems like the perfect end.
Muffy: Okay.
She brings back her crossbow and shoots.
INT: Control Room
Merton gets up and sees Santini standing in the middle of the room. He starts to lunge again but decides against it. He then looks to his right and sees a stool, then to the computer console controlling the TVs. He looks back and forth several times before catching on.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
The arrow moves in slow motion, Matrix style, toward Tommy. After a few seconds, Tommy checks his wristwatch (I know it's a cheep cliché but if you think about it visually it works).
INT: Control Room
Merton summons up enough courage to pick up the stool and throw it at the computer console. Sparks fly and Santini starts to convulse.
Merton: Well that did it.
INT: Werewolf Syndicate
The arrow shoots into Tommy's chest and he slumps to the ground.
Tommy: Ow, so much for the last second rescue.
His body starts to flicker and then teleport away. The arrow falls to the ground and Muffy goes to pick it up.
Muffy: It's just that kind of day I guess.
INT: Black Room of Nothingness
Both Tommy and Santini (no longer in Tommy's body) teleport into the familiar black room. Santini is still convulsing.
Tommy: So did I win or lose?
He looks down at Santini who has fallen on the ground and has started to puke up electricity.
Tommy: Well either way it looks like I got the better end of the deal.
Tommy vanishes.
INT: Control Room
Tommy's body is lying unconscience on the ground with Merton standing over it.
Merton: Oh god, I knew this would happen. I am such an idiot! I'm sorry man, I just didn't want to believe it my self. I should have told you about the prophecy before you got sucked into this whole mess. I can't believe this is happening.
Tommy wakes up.
Tommy: Hey Merton.
Merton (keeping back tears): Oh hey Tommy.
Tommy stands up.
Tommy: You all right man?
Merton: Yeah, I'm fine…it's just…
Merton quickly and tightly hugs Tommy, then backs off just as quickly and trys to stand as masculine as possible.
Tommy: Well that was, um…nice.
Merton: Okay, we can go now.
Tommy: Yeah.
The both rush towards the door but stop before they leave.
Tommy: Wait, what are we gonna do about these bodies.
Merton: They don't look dead. Leave em?
Tommy: Good.
They rush out.
EXT: Cable Station
Tommy and Merton walk out of the building.
Tommy: So what do you want to do now?
Merton: Factory?
Tommy: I don't know, I'm a little wiped out.
Merton: Come on, it'd Friday, free drinks.
Tommy: Oh crap I forgot.
Merton: What?
Tommy: I had a date with Ashley tonight.
Merton: Becky's friend?
Tommy: Yeah, I told her we'd meet at the Factory at 8:00. I'm, gonna be late.
Merton: Hey, you were sucked into another dimension, it happens.
Tommy: I gotta go.
Tommy runs to the right, off screen.
Merton: I'll get the car.
He remembers his car's current condition and runs off screen toward Tommy.
INT: Control Room
Pan through the unconscious bodies until we get back to the center of the room. Santini stands in the center, randomly flickering in and out of this reality.
Santini (to an unseen person): I need you to take care of something for me.
Unseen Female Person: Well, you helped me; I guess I should return the favor.
The camera turns and we see that Muffy has been brought out of the show and into reality.
Muffy: What do you need?
INT: The Factory
Tommy and Merton push their way through the crowd until they get some breathing room within the club.
Tommy: You see her?
Merton (disappointed): Yeah.
Tommy: Where is she?
Merton: Over there, (he points) with that guy.
Tommy looks and we see that Ashley is indeed dancing with another guy.
Tommy: Who's that?
Merton: That's Mitch Anderson; he's on the swim team.
Tommy: Oh.
Merton: Let's go man, this isn't looking too good.
Tommy: Yeah.
They start to walk off screen to the door. On the dance floor, Ashley sees them leave and runs after them.
EXT: Factory, Night
Tommy and Merton walk out of the Factory and start walking toward the hearse.
Merton: So, you feeling any side effects from the cross-dimensional travel?
Tommy: No, why?
Merton: I'm thinking of writing my thesis on it.
Ashley comes out from the Factory and runs up to Tommy.
Ashley: Tommy, wait up.
Tommy turns around.
Tommy: Oh, hi Ashley, that's all right, I was just getting out of here.
Ashley: Well, you wanna dance first?
Tommy: What about swim team Mitch Anderson.
Ashley: I don't like jocks.
Tommy laughs, but then looks confused.
Tommy: Wait a minute…
Ashley: Come on; let's go back in.
Ashley grabs Tommy's arm to pull him back into the club just as an arrow shoots into frame slicing through Ashley's side and resting under Tommy's ribs. Off in the alley, Muffy reloads her crossbow.
Muffy: Damn, I missed.
Merton rushes to Tommy first (what a friend) and tries to wake him up.
Merton: Tommy, are you all right? Say something.
Tommy: I'm fine; just get her to a hospital.
Merton: Who was that?
Tommy: I think I know.
Merton: Are you gonna be okay?
Tommy: I heal fast. Just go.
Merton starts to pick Ashley up, and with some difficulty, puts her into the hearse and drives away.
EXT: Another Alley, Night
Tommy runs in just as a shadow passes by, running out of the other end of the alley.
Tommy: Muffy!
A car screeches and Tommy turns to see Muffy, behind the wheel of a car running right into him. He jumps out of the way and the car drives off into the night. Tommy starts to run after her but falls to the ground, clutching his ribs.
INT: Hospital Room
It's your standard television Hospital room with Ashley in the bed and Tommy and Merton watching over her.
Merton: Did you, uh…
Tommy: No, couldn't get to her.
Merton: Who was it?
Tommy: Muffy, the werewolf slayer.
Merton: Given our current situation, I'm just gonna accept that as making sense.
Tommy: Santini brought her out…it doesn't matter.
Merton: Well, on the up side, the doctor said she's gonna be okay.
Tommy (melancholy): Well that's good.
Merton: It's going to be fine, Tommy. Ease up a bit.
Tommy (exploding): No Merton, I won't ease up! This girl got hurt because of me.
Merton: I didn't see you pulling the trigger.
Tommy: I might as well have.
Merton: Tommy, Ashley is okay, what is this about?
Tommy: I'm just sick and tired of people being put in danger because I'm…
Merton: A werewolf?
Tommy: Yeah.
Merton: Tommy, no offense, but you're an idiot.
Tommy: What?
Merton: Let's weigh for a second, the people you've put in danger with the people you've saved from danger. Oh, can't do it, the scale broke. A few innocents are gonna fall through the cracks but it doesn't change the fact that you help people.
Tommy: Say whatever you want, it doesn't make them any less dead.
Merton: This is about Lori, isn't it?
Tommy: What are you talking about?
Merton: It's just that since she left you've been taking great care in making everyone think you don't care that she left.
Tommy: She made her own decision; I'm fine.
Merton: Oh, and you sound so convincing.
Tommy: What do you want me to say? Yeah, I miss her.
Merton: And you think she left because of you, because you're a werewolf.
Tommy: That's ridiculous.
Merton: That's not why she left; she was fine with it.
Tommy: I know that.
Merton: Then what is it?
Tommy: It's just that she had to leave because I couldn't protect her. I just stood by while some monster turned her into a freak.
Merton: You mean, a freak like you.
Tommy: I kind of implied that, yes.
Merton: But she's okay.
Tommy: But…
Merton: But what?
Tommy: But she's not with me.
(Tense and morose pause)
Merton: Guess you just needed to vent.
Tommy: Yeah, I guess.
Merton: Maybe we should get out of here.
Tommy: Yeah, I think I am.
Merton: I'll get the car.
Tommy: No, I mean I think I'm gonna leave.
Merton: What, like the state?
Tommy: Yeah, when we graduate, I'm gone, out of this hellhole.
Merton: Where you gonna go?
Tommy: Someplace where I don't have to be the Pleasantville anything.
EXT: The Street Out Of Town, Night
Muffy's car drives down the road, past the "You Are Now Leaving Pleasantville" Sign.
INT: Monastery
The camera tracks along several monks in robes, apparently praying from books. The camera stops at a particular monk, his/her face covered by a hood. He/she drops the hood to reveal that it is indeed Lori, praying like the others. Her all white eyes start to flicker to signify an oncoming vision.
Lori's Vision
Seen from the eyes of a demon, Tommy is fighting off a pair of claws, which eventually get the better of him, stabbing him to death.
Back to Reality
Lori gets up, shocked, and runs off screen.
Next Episode: Destiny's A Bitch, part one
A prophecy foretells Tommy's imminent death and a hideous demon with unspeakably horrible slobber comes to town. Lori races to the rescue while Tommy once again fights for his life.
